Lights out, Uchiha

Chapter 1 The birth of mission KSA

Disclaimer: No, I don't own Naruto… I could never…IF perhaps I did I would not be just writing fan fiction. This is done purely for entertainment.

Ages:

Rookie 9: 18

Team Gai: 19

Temari: 21

Kankuro :20

Hanabi: 13

Konohamaru corps: 14

Italics-thoughts

Bold/underline-stressed speech

CAPITALS -shouts

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(Flashback) 'Sasuke-kun, will you go to dinner with me...you know for my birthday…"

No response.

'Y-you don't have to come if you don't want to...' Sakura stammered nervously.

It was a beautiful March spring day, and Sakura wanted an escort to her birthday party. Sasuke had returned to Konoha four months earlier and was more emo and stick up the ass (Sorry Sasuke fan girls!!) but She had forgiven the avenger and loved him even more. He looked at her blankly, pausing his violent decimation of Konoha's forests and brutal mutilation of a training dummy.

'Please Come, Please Come, Please come' she repeated over and over hoping that somehow he'd say yes.

'Sakura…I can't' he said monotonously.

'I-I understand' she sighed dejectedly as he resumed practice visibly ignoring her.

'You're an avenger.... I've heard that many times before!" she thought as she left the training ground.

As she remembered what occurred just moments ago, she burst into a set of fresh tears. Seriously, how many times was he going to break her heart? She never expected him to come on a shiny white horse, sweeping her off her feet, singing ballads or poetry or whatever. She knew he wasn't that type…and yes, for the third time, he was an avenger. She couldn't help but feel hurt so she decided on going home and going straight off to bed to shamelessly drown her sorrows. She expected that Sasuke might have changed, wishful thinking on her part.

His homecoming was nothing you'd expect. Just a dry, old anti-climatic "I'm Back", "as if he'd returned from vacation in Hawaii, or something. No heartbroken fool crying 'you finally came back home', just plain random shock. Things were hardly ever surprising in Konoha anymore and people went on with their lives. "WHY can't I ever stop loving you' she muttered dejectedly.

Suddenly, she heard some annoyingly high-pitched shrill shrieking, breaking her from her reminiscent reverie. Only one thing can disturb the peace like that in Konoha, and it was Ino Yamanaka. The whole village knew of the entire village's secret affairs and business solely through her lethal tongue. The said person burst open the door dramatically, leaving Tenten and Hinata in her wake, following somewhat unwillingly.

'Forehead, Kiba told Naruto who told Lee who told Gai-sensei who told his hairdresser who told Kakashi who told Mr Ichiraku's cousin's daughter's team-mate who I met at that new bar told me, so then I absolutely had to tell Hinata and Tenten that Sasuke rejected you 'Ino said all in one breath.

"Hard to think that the laziest people are in Konoha…That happened twenty minutes ago!!!" exclaimed Tenten.

'But I guarantee you billboard, if you try Ino's supreme extreme youthful love kit, then all your love problems will go adios.' Finished Ino smoothly.

"U-um I don't mean to be rude Ino but…youthful?' inquired Hinata apprehensively.

'Lee's the only business partner I got at that time. I wonder why no one else wanted to…" Ino said thoughtfully. 'It's a steal at four easy payments of 25 yen'

'Maybe it's because you're the one giving the advice. I don't want the stupid love kit and I can handle it alone.' She said pissed. 'I'm going training with Hokage-sama.'

'We've got to do something about her' Tenten said as the door slammed in front of them.

After a long hard training, Sakura trudged home tired and frustrated, desiring only a warm vanillas scented bubble bath, maybe a body scrub, a warm dinner, some chocolate, a good book and then a nice long nap. But when she opened the door and turning on the light she knew her bath, rest and dinner plans were ruined due to certain unwanted invaders in her home.

That selfsame gang was comprised of Lee, who was sitting on the sofa, Naruto searching her cupboards, Hinata twiddling her fingers, looking longingly at him, Ino sitting on her kitchen table ranting about her troubled love affair to a bored looking Tenten who sat opposite her.

'WHAT ARE YOU PEOPLE DOING IN MY HOUSE!?!?!" thundered Sakura, her eyes turning Sharingan red with rage.

'Sakura-Chan, my youthful blossom, we are only here to help aid in giving assistance to you,' Lee said animatedly.

'Lee you do realise that help, assistance and aid all means the same thing, stupid!!' Tenten said frustratedly with anime veins popping up. 'And Ino dragged me here. I was watching a new episode of shinobi wives."

'I heard that the asshole dumped you and I'm ready to kick his bastard as all over Konoha'. Naruto adamantly exclaimed, pumping a fist in the air.

'Crazy fools' Sakura muttered darkly. 'I'm over it' she said with a nice big fake smile pasted on her face.

'We're gonna pay him back for toying with your emotions…YOU HEARD THAT SHIKAMARU!!! YOU"LL HAVE HELL TO PAY!!! Ranted Ino, shouting all up to the heavens, as everyone stepped away from her nervously.

"She does realise that we're talking about Sasuke…right' whispered Naruto to Tenten.

"Who knows what goes on in the mind of our resident psycho, who knows" she answered sweat dropping.

"But somehow you can decipher your boyfriend the human Popsicle, huh' said Sakura slyly glad that she finally had the chance to do some teasing.

"NEJI IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND!!!" Tenten loudly exclaimed, adding to the current bitch fit that Ino was throwing.

Suddenly, the bitch fit was over, the birds stopped chirping, the rivers stopped running, Tsunade dropped her bottle of sake, Jiraiya stopped peeking at women, Neji sneezed repeatedly and Orochimaru checked into rehab.

'O-kaaay…' said Ino backing away from Tenten, somehow forgetting that she just received the Oscar for bitchiness (I'm not Ino-bashing, I do love Ino), and had moments ago threw a fit that was unrivalled in Konoha.

'Nobody said he was Tenten. All I said was boyfriend' Sakura said innocently.

'Well team, it seems that we have multiple missions on our hands…Mission KSA is now in operation'. Ino said professionally, while Lee took notes with his trusty pen and notepad ™.

'Wait… KSA? What's it mean?' asked Naruto cluelessly scratching his head.

'Kick Sasuke's Ass' supplied Tenten "that bastard's going down one way or another."

'WHO"S WITH ME!!!" exclaimed Ino

"For all the unbearable brunt of agonising pain delivered onto my beloved, most youthful cherry blossom," added Lee passionately.

"THAT, AND MESSING AROUND WITH ME ALL THE TIME!! Thinks he's so cool, but I'm gonna show him…" swore Naruto shaking his fist at the heavens, eyes blazing with determination.

'GET THE FRICKIN' FIRE EXTINGUISHER!!! MY HOUSE IS ON FIRE!!!' Screamed Sakura over the wild smoke alarm, as the gang scrambled to fill buckets of water and search for the extinguisher.

'Such youth Naruto demonstrates…I sometimes wish he were on our team to aid in spreading the joys of youth to my non-believing team-mates' said Lee wistfully, oblivious to the scalding heat of the raging inferno.

"Well there's nothing I could say to prevent you guys, but heck, I'm never in any main plot adventure…so I guess I'm in" Reasoned Tenten enthusiastically.

"And I could be around Naruto too" thought Hinata, blushing slightly.

"Ready your weapons" Said Tenten, eyes dangerously narrowing.

"NON VIOLENT, flower. Violence taints your divine Gai-sensei given youth. Why it..."

"Shut up, Lee. Let's do this" Tenten responded, agitated.

"Like I said before, WHO'S WITH ME!!!" roared Ino triumphantly, standing on a coffee table, pumping her fists in the air.

"WE ARE!!!' everyone else responded as Sakura shook her head.

"AND WHO ARE WE!?"

"TEAM KSA!!!GO KSA!!!!!!YAAYYYYYY!!!"

'My house is totally ruined…my mom is SO gonna freak' cried Sakura silently, looking at the glowing furniture.

Little did she know that the madness was only just the beginning.

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Wow…. That only took one hour three, pages and 1, 156 words. Trust me it will get funnier and I've already got this story all planned out. Please review and give any suggestions or anything you think should happen. Flames or whatever, I'll take it like a man (even if I'm a girl)

Main Pairings include

Sasu/ Saku?

Neji/Ten?

Naru/Hina?

Ino/Shika/Tem

Any other pairings will be decided on later. Lookout for chapter two: Plans and Inconveniences. Adios, goodbye and out. And about the kit...let's not go there..