Heart: Hah! Another pointless article!
Mercy: Torturing our favourite star guest on Weird Fanfictions!
Heart: That's right it's our very well loved and tortured Kai!
Mercy: Don't arrest us yes for being crazy... You can do that later after you read the fanfiction!
Heart: Oh and by the way... we don't own Beyblade.
Mercy: -sobs-
Heart: -edges away- So welcome to the show... er... fanfiction!
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Meet Kai's little sister Kris. She's a happy, average, normal girl whose one main goal is to kill Kai. Yup, very average and happy. She is about 10 year old and has droopy grey hair. Basically she is a samll female version of Kai that just has a few kinks to work out. She has his coolness, his sarcasm, but she is also rather evil. She is not really Kai's bilogical sister because she was created from scratch at the abbey. That's right, no cake mix included, pretty good for Boris and Voltaire. This is a story about her.
One night Kai was sleeping when he woke up because he heard a suspicious noise. He woke up and saw Kris holding knife over him. She quickly hid the knife behind her back and said, "Umm… I had a nightmare Kai." and immediately changed into an innocent little girl. Kai was confused and drowsy from just waking up so he didn't notice the attempt on his life by his little sister. He just told her to go back to sleep and he went back to bed.
The next night Kai woke up and found himself on a board with his legs and arms pinned down. There was a laser going to cut him in half. Kris was laughing maniacally. She said, "Muahaha! You ignored my attempts to kill you and now you suffer the consequences!" Kai easily broke through the chains and left. Kris was left there standing. "I knew I should have actually bought the chains instead of picking them out of the dumpster dammit!"
He began avoiding Kris for a while but it was kind of hard because they were brother and sister. One night later he found himself with his mouth stuffed with acorns and Kris about to release a cage of evil, crazed squirrels on him.
"Aarghuah grah grah." was all Kai managed to say with his mouth stuffed with acorns. He easily spat out the acorns. One hit Kris's head. "Dammit!" she said. The rabid, evil squirrels automatically saw this and attacked Kris. She did survive but was thoroughly scratched.
Kris decided to get help and ran to the master of advice… Rick otherwise known as WHITE HAIRED DUNGA! She begged for advice and his amazingly wise response was "Dye your hair white so you can be another white haired dunga!"
Kris realized this was pointless and left thinking, "Note to self. Find a better person to go to for advice." She left annoyed stomped away. Suddenly Spencer and Ian appeared out of the shadows. Tala was nowhere in sight. hint hint.
Spencer: To protect the world for deviation… NO! Wait. Oh the script is weird. Anyways… to protect the world for devastation…
Ian: To unite all people in our nation…
Spencer: To pronounce the evils of truth and love
Ian: To extend our reach to the stars above
Spencer: Spencer
Ian: Ian
Spencer: Surrender now or prepare to beyblade!
Tala (in background): Do I have to?
Spence and Ian: YES!
Tala: Fine. -steps out of shadows in Meowth costume- That's right.
Kris punched Tala in the stomach and hit Ian and Spencer in the head and said "You idiots that's the Team Rocket thing not yours! You idiot plagiarisers! Get lost!" The Demolition Boys slowly sink into the shadows sobbing their heads off.
"How pathetic." Kris whipped her head around, possibly getting whiplash from turning around as fast as that, and saw a guy with nerdy glasses and a really dorky stripped shirt. "Who are you!" she asked. The guy responded, "I'm the reporter. We ran out of ideas so we're going to end the fanfiction right now. So bye!" Kris was screaming while being dragged away and thrown into her medical ward for mental people. She waited and to keep herself company started talking to herself. "I will kill Kai. I will! I'm going to kill Kai. He can't run anymore. He can't! They'll think I'm crazy but I'm not crazy. I'm the only one that isn't crazy. I show them. Some day I'll show them! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
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Is Kris actually mental?
Will Kris appear in other fanfictions because this one is done?
Will it be one that makes sense and goes on about her creation?
Or will it just be crap?
Find out next time on Weird Fanfictions!