Title: Touchy and Feely
Summary: During another boring captain's meeting, Shunsui finds a much more interesting way of distracting himself. Ukitake, however, isn't all that amused...
Pairing/s: Shunsui/Ukitake
Disclaimer: I don't own nothing belonging to Bleach
Warnings: Uh, one swear word at the end?
AN: Hello again! This was supposed to be a drabble, but it kinda grew bigger than that. I haven't done a drabble for a while and I don't think I'm very good at them now XD This is kinda short and stupid, but I hope you'll enjoy reading it anyway!
Captains' meetings. Boring. Tedious. Long. Oh god, oh-so long.
They don't teach you how to deal with the droning, monotonous voice of Head-Captain Yamamoto, going on and on, at the academy.
And, honestly, they should. It can be more painful and unbearable than dealing with hoards of Hollows. In fact, many Reapers would volunteer to go hunting for Hollows instead of having to listen to Old Man Yamamoto.
New captains were always so shocked, and some even appalled with the realization that they have to go through these meetings every single week. And, on some occasions, every single day.
It's utterly horrifying to them that they could be so bored and not fall asleep. Or die. And they often worry about the sanity of the older, more experienced captains.
Really? Two thousand years of this?
Ukitake knows better than anyone how boring, how utterly mind-numbing these meetings can be. And knows the best way to get through them;
Distractions.
He's learnt to distract him, to drown out his sensei's voice and keep himself occupied mentally. And the monthly captain meetings, the ones that can go on for hours and they have the privilege to sit down, were the ones he found easier to get through. The shorter ones, where he had to stand were a little harder.
What did he do to keep himself busy? Well, writing down ideas for his children novels' of course. Scribbling in a notebook and random pieces of paper made it appear as though he was paying attention and writing important things down.
It was also helpful if he sat next to Shunsui during these meetings, which he did most of the time and whenever possible. They both kept each other alert and made the hours go much, much faster. No one questioned when they 'compared' notes. In reality, though, they were simply passing notes, making random conversations on paper.
It kept them busy, entertained, and most importantly, sane.
Shunsui, however, often found other ways to distract himself. He came up with new ideas and methods, often spending the time he should be working on his paperwork coming up with 'survival tactics', as he called them.
And, sometimes, they involved Ukitake himself. Voluntary, or involuntary.
Involuntary, more often than not.
Today was no different.
They were approximately 30 minutes into their monthly captains' meeting. Shunsui had been sitting relatively quietly in his usual place beside Ukitake. And Ukitake was in the middle of jotting down an exciting idea for his string of novels while the other captains struggled to stay awake. Captain Kenpachi, however, gave up minutes into the meeting and was no softly snoring in the back corner of the room.
Things had been proceeding as normal.
Until…
Ukitake stiffened in his seat, being pulled from his thoughts and musings when he felt something warm touch his leg, or more accurately, his upper thigh. His right upper thigh. The side that Shunsui was sitting. And that something, Ukitake knew, was a hand. Shunsui's hand.
His hand rested on the top of his leg, fingers teasing his inner thigh. Long, talented fingers stroked and petted the material of his clothing, uncomfortably close to a place where a hand shouldn't be daring to go, especially under a desk in a room filled with captains during a captains' meeting.
With Old Man Yama sitting right there.
Ukitake bit the inside of his mouth in a desperate attempt to prevent a whimper from escaping his lips.
Keeping his writing hand upon the table, Ukitake tried to keep his expression neutral as he slipped his other hand under the table. His fingers immediately found Shunsui's offending hand and he tried to, oh-so subtly, to unclamp his hand from his person. He managed to pry Shunsui's hand off his thigh, and he shot him a disapproving look from the corner of his eye.
Shunsui, however, barely held back that sexy half-grin of his.
And then, his hand was back. Much, much closer to that...sensitive spot.
Ukitake squeaked rather loudly in surprised, immediately shifting in his seat to position his legs away from Shunsui's hand as he gripped his wrist, pinning it to the side of his seat. He felt his features heat up as he glared a little harder at Shunsui, clearly telling him not to try that again.
However, the very second he squeaked, the room fell into a thick and deafening silence. And, probably rightly so, all attention was on him.
Oh dear…
"Is there something wrong, Captain Ukitake?"
"Uh…" Ukitake fumbled with his words as he turned to gaze at his stern looking sensei, his hand still grasping Shunsui's wrist tightly. And the other man, infuriatingly, looked unfazed, smug even.
"I…I'm sorry," Ukitake managed to utter. "I guess I'm not feeling very well."
Sensei peered at him through one half-lidded eye, a gaze both piercing and searching. "Is that so?"
"Yare," Shunsui suddenly spoke up, nothing but confidence oozing in his voice. "Maybe I should escort him home so he can rest. We wouldn't want him to get worse, hm?"
Yamamoto was completely silent, now peering at them both with a look that, from Ukitake's point of view, was filled with pure scepticism.
Ukitake felt himself wince. Oh please, to whoever was listening, don't let sensei figure out what was really going on. He didn't know what was worst, the punishment for interrupting a meeting or the humiliation of Old Man Yama knowing where Shunsui's hand was.
"Hm, very well," Yamamoto suddenly agreed. "You two may be excused."
The very moment those words left his sensei's mouth, Ukitake released Shunsui's hand and scrambled to his feet, his notes and papers haphazardly clutched against his chest as he muttered soft apologies. He stood up and Shunsui, as calm as ever, was by his side, his arm oh-so conveniently wrapped around his shoulders.
As they moved to leave, Ukitake could have sworn he heard a few of his few captains muttering to themselves.
"Lucky bastard."
"If they ask for notes, I'm fucking killing them."
"Not feeling well, my ass."
Ukitake pushed back a blush as he hastily made his way, with Shunsui of course, out of the room. He almost sighed loudly with relief when he heard the large doors slam to a close.
When he knew they were out of ear shot, Ukitake abruptly pulled himself away from Shunsui's arm, spun around and punched him square in the stomach. Shunsui made a wheezing sound as he doubled over, clutching his stomach.
"You pervert," Ukitake almost, very nearly shrilled as he moved to stand before him, his body rigid from sheer indignity. "I can't believe you just did that!"
Shunsui suddenly laughed as he straightened his tall frame, his hands folding into his haori as he smiled that cheeky smile of his. And, most maddeningly of them all, he was completely unfazed by that jab to the gut.
"Aw, but Juu-chan," Shunsui playfully whined. "I've done that before."
Oh yes, many, many times before.
"But not during a meeting," Ukitake retorted. "That was something that should be done in private. As in alone."
"Hm, alone?" Shunsui took on a musing stance, folding his arm over his chest as he scratched his chin. He then looked undeniably devious. "Well, we're alone now, aren't we?"
Ukitake could only shake his head in exasperation. Still, there was a smile on his lips. "You're impossible," he muttered as he turned to leave, heading for the privacy of his Ugendo, Shunsui tailing oh-so closely behind him.
Well, the captains' meeting did indeed need to go on for an hour at least, so…
AN: …Hm, I just realised that I have the tendency to write certain favourite of mine in embarrassing situations, leaving them frazzled. Would that be considered lightly sadistic? :3
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