*All mistakes are mine.*
'JJ and Hotch have a little conversation on Christmas Eve.'
It had been a long week. The team had just finished up a brutal case, involving a child kidnapping serial killer. It had hit all of the team hard, especially those with children. The jet was down due to the downpouring of snow so they were left to spend Christmas Eve at the local hotel in Cincinnati, Ohio. Penelope had tried her best to fill the team with holiday cheer, and Rossi had done his best to provide the team with enough alcohol to forget that they would all be missing their loved ones this holiday. As the night drew closer to the midnight hour, bringing Christmas Day with it, the various members of their merry team started to trickle off to their respective hotel rooms. Penelope was first, citing her need for beauty sleep after the amount of pina colodas she had consumed. Spencer and Emily were next, the latter explaining she had developed a headache and the former because he wanted to read awhile before he too took his slumber. Rossi and Morgan didn't excuse themselves from Hotch and JJ for any of the other team members reasons, no, the two ladies men had in fact, found themselves some holiday company in the form of two very attractive redheads. JJ and Hotch were left sitting across from each other, feeling melancholy.
JJ glanced at Hotch, sipping on her umpteenth alcoholic beverage. He didn't look particularly cheery, not that he had that look all that often. She let her mind drift off on thoughts of her ever stoic boss, mainly so she didn't have to think about the fact she was going to miss her adorable son waking up excited for Christmas morning. She knew Hotch had to be feeling similar as he would be missing the same with Jack.
Hotch noticed her seemingly lost in thought, however, he didn't miss her glancing his way every so often. She had to be missing Henry, as he himself couldn't stop thinking about yet another holiday he was going to miss with his own son. Hotch hated that one of the downfalls of his job was missing so much time with his son. He was growing so quickly, and Hotch worried one day Jack would resent all the times Hotch promised he would be back but Jack had been let down.
"Penny for your thoughts? I'm sorry you have to miss spending Christmas with Henry and Will. If I could have arranged it so you could be there, I would. " Hotch said earnestly. He would do anything possible to accommodate his team. Especially JJ. He had always felt that the two of them connected on more than just a professional level from the moment she had started working at the BAU. It had existed way before either of them had children, and continued to grow through so many changes in both their lives. He considered her a friend and respected her work ethic. He also admired her ability to do everything so flawlessly. Not only was she a great mother, she showed great promise as he newest profiler and she was able to keep a successful relationship going.
JJ threw a lazy smile his way. "Hotch, I don't think even you can stop snow from falling. You aren't quite Superman." Hotch sent a smile her way with a slight chuckle. JJ always cherished the moments when she got to see his casual side. She loved his smile and especially his laughs. It made him look even more handsome than usual.
"Well, don't tell that to Jack. He thinks I'm his personal superhero." Hotch said brightly, clearly pleased his son continues to think so highly of his father.
JJ smiled again. "I'll get you a cape for your birthday. I think you could pull it off." At Hotch's second chuckle of the night, JJ continued. "Hotch, I know you miss Jack just as much as I miss Henry. You're a great father, I know you wish you could be with him more, but even as young as Jack is, he understands his daddy has an important job. Jack understands that the time you two do get to spend together matters more than anything."
Hotch nodded knowingly. "Are you talking about me or you, JJ?" JJ let out a sigh. "Both of us. Hotch? Can I ask you a personal question?" JJ asked him with a slight blush, or maybe it was just from the alcohol. They had both decided that the current beverages they were drinking would be their last, considering it was ten minutes until midnight.
Hotch looked at her. "Of course, JJ. You can ask me anything. I'm not sure there's all that much about me that you don't already know." Hotch wondered what it was she wanted to ask him. Or why she felt the need to ask him beforehand. JJ wasn't really the type to ask permission, she usually just asked what was on her mind.
JJ started to speak then stopped. She wasn't sure why she wanted to ask about Hotch's new girlfriend but she was insanely curious. Sure, she heard things here and there about her from Rossi and she'd even seen a picture of her that Penelope had tracked down when she did her throughout background check but that didn't quell her curiosity. Really, it wasn't even any of her business but JJ couldn't stop her round of questioning. She would blame intoxication in the morning.
"I wanted to ask how things were going with Beth. If you don't want to talk about it with me, I completely understand." JJ finally said, definitely fighting off a blush. Hotch looked at her then, he couldn't mistake that flush for alcohol this time. He wondered why asking about Beth would cause JJ to have that kind of reaction. Without dwelling on it, Hotch contemplated her question.
Things with Beth were going well, really well considering Hotch hadn't been in any kind of relationship since Haley. Beth was great. She was more than great, she was close to perfect. She was beautiful, fun, easy-going. They had things in common, like training for triathlons and having to deal with the sadness of death of someone dear to them. Beth also liked children, which having Jack, was a huge plus. Beth hadn't had any children herself and had been married once before, but things with him had ended two years prior as her former husband had been having an affair with his secretary, as cliché as that was.
"Things are going well. It's nice to have somebody there in a personal way. As great a friend as Dave is, Beth's a lot easier on the eyes." Hotch finally put together with a twinkle in his eyes. Dave had been the one to push him to pursue this thing with Beth. If it were just up to Hotch, he would have never taken to the level that it was approaching now. He took a glance at JJ, she seemed to not be satisfied with his answer, before he could ask what specifically she wanted to know, JJ started talking again.
"I'll bet. She's very pretty. I'm really happy for you Hotch, you deserve to be happy." JJ said a tad too diplomatically for Hotch's taste. Sure, he believed her sincerity but something about the way she said it and that blush she was sporting earlier made Hotch very curious. Perhaps things weren't going as well with Will as he had assumed?
"As do you, JJ. So, how are things going on with Will? You guys planning on getting married any time soon?" Hotch asked. He was always curious why the two had never gotten to that point. From the limited interaction he'd had with Will, he seemed like a pretty stand up guy and he clearly loved JJ. He left his career and home for her. If that isn't a sign of love, Hotch didn't know what was. Hotch knew JJ has reservations about love, but he thought Will had broken her out of her latent trust issues.
JJ sighed. "Things are going, I suppose. He's actually asked me to marry him six times now. Before we left for this case was the sixth time. It was a really beautiful proposal, any girl would be lucky to be married to Will. He's really perfect, you know. " JJ said practically gushing. Hotch was even more confused. Will had proposed, JJ thought Will was perfect yet clearly JJ had turned him down. Hotch was obviously missing something. He was a profilier, he should have picked up on something if JJ were unhappy.
"JJ, why did say no? I may not be an expert on women, but if he's as great as you say he is, why not say yes? Why not be the beautful bride we all know you would be?" Hotch said, perplexed.
JJ looked at him strangely. "You really think I'd be a beautiful bride?" JJ really must have been more drunk than she realized. Hotch probably thought she was hitting on him. She wasn't. Not that Hotch was worthty of being hit on, because he was. It's not like JJ hadn't thought of Hotch in a non-professional way before. Believe her, she had. Especially when she first started working there. Hello, I have a hot new boss late-night fantasies. Of course, besides the obvious, you don't sleep with your boss no matter how hot he is rule, Hotch was happily married. When Haley and Hotch started having problems those pesky thoughts started up again, but then she had Will and as she told Hotch, Will was perfect. He was really great, it's just JJ wasn't sure Will was perfect for her.
Hotch looked slightly startled. "Of course. You're a beautiful young women. You'd make a lovely bride." A beautiful young women? What is he? Her grandfather? Of course Hotch had noticed the appealing looks of his colleague. Ever since JJ had strolled into his office for her Media Liaison interview in her tight little skirt and her luscious blonde locks in a loose bun, Hotch had let himself on a few occasions, fanastize on what it would be like to pull her up against him and capture her lips in a searing kiss. Hotch had pushed those thoughts aside a long time ago. There were many reasons to bury his latent feelings for her. She was his subordinate, she was younger than him, and most important on a personal level, she had a boyfriend. Really, Hotch had too much baggage for someone as vibrant as JJ to be saddled with.
JJ didn't know why but she suddenly felt like she had been let down. Young women? Even if she did have more than friendly feelings for her boss, calling her a 'beautiful young women' clearly sent the message to her that he would never be interested in her in that way. She shouldn't even be upset by that, she didn't have feelings for Hotch. That would be ridiculous.
"Thank you, Hotch. I just, I love Will, I do. It's just sometimes, well, most times lately, I don't feel like Will's the guy for me. Don't get me wrong, he's been great to me and he's wonderful with Henry. I can't bring myself to say yes to his proposals because there's something, something I can't even explain that's telling me I should say no. I think the only reasons I stay in the relationship is that I don't want to break Will's heart or stop Henry from seeing his father anytime he wants to. I also feel guilty because Will basically gave up his life just to be with me and I'm not willing to do the same for him. That isn't love. At least not on my part." JJ barred her soul to Hotch. She almost regretted it when she thought she saw a hint of disapproval in Hotch's eyes. The last thing she wanted to do was have Hotch be disappointed in her. She valued his approval more than anything besides her son. If she were sober, that may have set of warning bells in her head.
"JJ, if you aren't happy, you can't let Will's happiness come before your own. Henry will adjust, he's still young." JJ knew he was right. JJ felt something wet hit her cheek and felt like screaming when she realized she was crying. She hated to show this kind of weakness in front of being, let alone Hotch. Hotch grabbed her hand with one of his and dabbed her eyes with his other thumb. He pulled her chin up to look him in the eyes.
"Hey, JJ, it's okay. Look at me, sweetheart. You can't let yourself feel guilty about this. Sometimes, even though we try our best it's just not meant to be." Hotch tried his best to console the crying woman in front of him. If possible, she looked even more beautiful. He hadn't had an inkling she hadn't been happy with Will. Hotch felt guilty himself for not paying close enough attention to her to notice.
"It's officially Christmas. " JJ sniffled out. Hotch smiled at her. So, it was.
"Even though we couldn't spend Christmas with our sons, there's nobody else I'd rather spend it with than you." Hotch spoke kindly, forgetting about Beth for the time being. JJ let out a grin.
"You sure about that Hotch? You're actually happy to be spending Christmas with some crazy crying lady?" JJ asked with a laugh. She had to admit, it had felt good letting some things off her chest. She always felt better after she talked to Hotch. They hadn't had as many heart to hearts as they used to.
"I'm positive. As much as I'd like to talk to all night and dry your tears if they happened to fall again, I think we should both be heading to bed. Garcia said we should be able, weather permitting, leave tomorrow night." Hotch said. Grabbing her hand, and pulling her up beside him.
"A comfortable bed sounds wonderful right now, although I'm not sure we'll be laying in the most comfortable of quarters tonight, boss-man." JJ said, while she stumbled, thankful for the support Hotch's hand was providing her. She should not have had that extra vodka and tonic.
"Boss-man? JJ, you're wounding my ego, here. It's Superman to you." Hotch said looking completely serious before he broke out in a grin. JJ smiled right back at him, before she mumbled something to Hotch about being tired and promptly passed out. Hotch barely had time to catch her before she hit her head on the floor.
Hotch gathered her up in his arms and started walking towards their hotel rooms when he realized he didn't know where JJ's hotel key was. He didn't want to feel around in her pockets for it nor did he want to wake up Emily. Hotch decided to just take her to his room. Hotch, with a bit of difficultly, opened up his hotel door and made it over to his bed. He pulled down his covers, with one hand, and placed JJ in the bed, pulling his covers over her. He brushed some stray hairs out of her face affectionately before he started to make a bed for himself on he couch. Hotch was just about to fall asleep himself when he heard JJ call out for him. Hotch got up quickly and went to her side.
"What's the matter JJ? I hope you don't mind, I brought you to my room. I didn't know where your key was and I didn't want to wake Emily up." Hotch said, hoping she wouldn't think he was trying to take advantage of her. He saw JJ smile sleepily and pat the place next to her.
"It's okay, Hotch. I appreciate you taking care of me. Now, get in bed." JJ said with a slight slur.
Hotch smile yet shook his head. It wasn't appropriate for many reasons. Of course, her being in his room at all wasn't appropriate either. Hotch stood there silently debating, almost hoping she'd drift asleep.
"Hotch, I don't bite, unless you want." JJ said with a wink. Hotch didn't know what to say to that. On one hand, again, inappropriate but on the other hand, the hand that was a little drunk and very attracted both physically and emotionally to the blonde thought that was a very pleasing idea.
"Hotch, I was just kidding. Don't get your panties into a bunch. I'm really tired, and I know you are too. We're both adults, get beside me. If it makes you feel better you can sleep on top of the blanket." JJ said with a giggle. Hotch really was too cute sometimes.
Hotch nodded. He was tired. He climbed into the bed, careful not to touch her in any way. Just as Hotch was about to fall asleep, JJ turned over and gave him a chaste kiss on his cheek.
"Goodnight, Hotch. Thank you for everything tonight. Jack was right. You are a superhero." JJ said quietly before she fell asleep again. Hotch felt himself blush. "Goodnight, JJ. Sweet dreams." Hotch whispered before he too fell asleep, thoughts of the beauty next to him invading his dreams.