Chapter 1

Out of the gloom

I was the first person into class for once and whilst I was waiting for everyone else to arrive I pulled out my book.

I was in my usual place at the back of the room trying to block out the sounds of everyone talking in the next classroom.

The book I was currently reading was highly captivating and as usual all I wanted to do was read.

One by one my friends started arriving and as usual when they greeted me I said Hi as an automatic response which was pretty much as much as I said to anyone these days.

Then came the gorgeous voice of Jamie.

"Morning all!" He said in his usual cheery voice that never failed to make my heart crumble and all the other girls I knew thought I was crazy because I never went all giggly around him.

I regularly heard them talking about how weird I was but I didn't care in the slightest. I kept to myself.

After class I left with my friends and felt someone looking intensely at me but I ignored it, expecting it to be another one of the other girls in my class like Jess who was always trying to figure me out because she loved gossip.

I had learnt to block off my emotions most of the time although I did occasionally slip up.

It had taken four whole years to learn how to master the technique and I was now in year 10 in 2006 at school and the only positive part of it was that I got to have something to do.

My first class of the day was science and I was not looking forward to it.

We where currently studying biology and we had to do a one lesson project on the genetics of rats.

To my Horror, when we got into the classroom my partners AND Jamie's partner where both away and I had to work on the same sheet as him.

I forced myself to concentrate on what the teacher was saying and I took far more notes than necessary even though I had studied the assignment thoroughly the night before.

Once the Teacher had completed his explanation of how we where to complete the sheet everyone went to sit by their partners.

I stayed where I was because I could feel myself freezing up. "Hey Sally", Jamie said as he sat down beside me.

My stomach gave a huge leap and I moved my head slowly around to look at Him.

"Hi", I said, feeling myself turn slightly pink.

"I see you took plenty of notes" he said smiling widely "we'll hardly have to do any work at all!"

I laughed hollowly and turned to the sheet between us."Hey Sally, I was wandering if you were busy this weekend?"

I froze solid in my seat and then as I slowly began to feel warm again I rushed to answer.

"Ye, I mean no, I'm not doing anything this weekend." I stammered.

"Why did you want to know?" I asked looking into his chocolate brown eyes.

"Well, I was wandering, if you wanted, would you like to watch the notebook with me?"

I stared at him; of course I wanted to watch a movie with him! What crazy girl in this school wouldn't? And why was he asking me?!

"S Sure, I'd love to!"I said after almost ten seconds.

If I hadn't been sitting I would have collapsed.

"Great! How about I'll meet you at the cinema on Saturday at 2pm, I'll pay for the tickets and popcorn!"He said quickly with full confidence.

"OK" I said and then we turned to the worksheet and thanks to my study and my notes, and of course his intelligence, we finished the sheet before the end of the lesson and sat chatting.

The rest of the week went by very slowly. Every time Jamie smiled at me from across the class room or greeted me I would turn bright red and smile back at him.

On Friday I sat alone in the canteen quadrangle and thought about the song my friends where currently writing. They had formed a band together and even though they asked me to join every few weeks I still refused.

I had never told anyone that I could play the piano but they still insisted that I would be able to play some kind of music if I tried.

I decided that since I was sitting alone, again, that I should tune into the current gossip so I pulled out my book and pretended to be reading whilst listening to the gossip group across from me And was surprised to find that their current topic was me!

"How does she do it?! Ever since she came to this school she has hardly said more than a sentence and now all of a sudden she has been asked out by Jamie!" I heard Jess say

"I know!, she doesn't even seem to notice him until he says Hi to her and then she just turns pink and carries on like nothing has happened!"

I tuned out, I was glad that they never knew how much I liked Jamie and I found it funny that they found it to be such an outrage.

I suddenly felt someone watching me very closely from the other side of the table and then the bench across from me creaked.

I looked up in surprise and saw that Jamie had sat down directly across from me. I smiled.

Jamie had sat with me twice so far and loved to chat with Him.

I told Him all about How I had been backstabbed in my last school and that the reason I never talked was because if I kept to myself then I wouldn't be able to be hurt.

I found it strangely easy to tell Jamie these sorts of things.

When I got home I went straight to my keyboard began writing a new song.

I used to write songs all the time and had a small book of them buy when I went into my depressed stage I had stopped.

I continued until I heard my parents calling me down for dinner.

I went down and they were so surprised to see me smile that they hardly touched their food and once I was done I cleaned the kitchen and told my parents that I was going out on Saturday and went to take a shower and go to bed.

The next morning I woke at 10 and decided that I would have to clean up a bit for the movie.

I looked at myself in the mirror. I was not skinny but I wasn't large.

My hair which used to be a beautiful reddish brown was now a dark brown that hung limp from 3 years of neglect.

I tied it up into a high bun rather than a plain ponytail and went to my wardrobe.

I had the worst selection for a nice movie because everything was blacks, greys and brown with a few dark coloured items thrown in.

I grabbed a pair of black slim-flare jeans and a deep blue v neck that was dusty from hanging there for so long.

I left the house at one after completing all my chores.

Jamie greeted me warmly outside the cinema with a large box of popcorn and 2 cokes with the movie tickets held between his first and second fingers.

We headed in to the cinema and sat down. We chatted mindlessly about our English test coming up.

When the movie started Jamie held his hand on my arm rest with his palm up.

I placed my hand in his and watched. During the sadder parts of the film I found myself crying into his shoulder.