Disclaimer: I do not aim, nor do I claim to own, or am I affiliated in any way with the Addams Family in any of its forms
Gomez and Morticia sat with their heads pressed together on the daybed, Morticia fit comfortably on his lap. He pressed a kiss to his wife's forehead. They had been married exactly a week ago today, and their whirlwind romance was still going full steam. Since the impromptu ceremony the two had been inseparable. Morticia hadn't even bid goodbye to her mother and uncle when they left the house- and hadn't been back to collect her possessions either. She wore her wedding dress still during the day, and during the night she had borrowed one of Gomez's evening jackets, but it had rarely so much as touched her shoulders on those nights.
A loud foghorn sounded throughout the house, but neither of the happy pair shifted position, instead allowing their butler, Lurch, to answer the door.
"Morticia!" the shrill voice of Hester Frump came from the foyer.
"Hello mother," Morticia replied, without looking away from her husband.
Mother Frump's eyes widened at seeing the pair sat so close and comfortably, and rushed forward, pulling her daughter off the man.
"Mother!" Morticia shouted out in surprise.
"Mother Frump!" Gomez jumped up from the daybed. "I didn't hear you come in, how long has it been? A week? We really must do this more often!"
"Morticia!" Fester walked into the room, arms spread wide.
"Uncle Fester!" Morticia hugged her uncle. "It's so good to see you."
Mother Frump shifted her eyes between her daughter and son-in-law, then gently took her daughter by the wrist, "Morticia, is there somewhere we can speak in private?"
"Yes, the kitchen," Morticia led the way down the hall, giving her husband a quick kiss as she passed him.
The two women sat down at the small kitchen table across from each other.
"Now Morticia," Mother Frump spoke seriously. "We never got a chance to have a mother-to-daughter chat after the wedding."
"I know mother, but it was all so quick."
"Morticia, has he been treating you right?"
"Of course he has mother," Morticia gave a gentle smile at the thought of him. "He's been a perfect gentleman this whole time."
Mother Frump didn't look convinced, "Have you discussed your life together yet? Are you going to live here? Is his mother going to live here? Are you planning any children? What about a burial plot?"
"We're going to be buried side by side," Morticia replied. "And we haven't had a chance to discuss any of your other points yet. We've only been married a week."
"Now Morticia," Mother Frump looked stern. "I know Gomez is very charming, and I know he's your husband. But make sure you're careful when you're with him, you don't want to suddenly find yourself alone with a dozen children and no money."
Morticia's eyes flashed anger, "Mother! Gomez would never leave me, not ever."
Mother Frump let out a sigh, "Alright darling, you seem to know what you're doing with him. Now let's go out there to him and make a few arrangements."
Morticia immediately allowed herself to be enveloped in her husband's arms as soon as she returned to her husband.
"Ah querida, I missed you so much."
"I missed you too, bubbeleh," Morticia leaned up and kissed him.
"Ah, you two are perfect for each other," Fester sighed happily from the corner. "I'm so glad I didn't let you go through with the wedding to Ophelia."
"Fester, you were twisting my arm so that I would marry Ophelia," Gomez replied with a perplexed look.
"Yeah, but I didn't mean it," Fester quickly looked away.
"Gomez!" Mother Frump interjected. "We need to talk about a few points before I leave you here with my daughter."
"Dowry?"
"No," Mother Frump frowned. "Firstly, are the two of you going to be living here with your mother?"
"I'd thought we might," Gomez nodded.
"Oh, could we?" Morticia smiled gently. "I do love it here, I have a feeling it's haunted."
"Dreamer," Gomez chided jokingly.
"And children? Do you plan on having children?" Mother Frump asked.
The pair looked at each other momentarily, and then both nodded, "Yes."
"Are you going to start spawning them right away? Or are you using protection?"
"We haven't... We never thought..." Gomez fumbled awkwardly for the words.
"We're not using anything," Morticia jumped in. "Let nature do what nature will. Let the children come when we are meant to have them."
Mother Frump looked less than happy at this, but pressed on anyway, "I'd like to have you under supervision."
"Supervision?" Gomez looked offended.
"You're not thinking of moving in, are you Mother?" Morticia asked cautiously.
"Oh no," Mother Frump shook her head. "I thought perhaps your uncle."
"Uncle Fester?"
"Oh we'd love to have Fester stay here with us!" Gomez excitedly ran over to Fester. "What say you old man?"
Fester nodded, "Sure! Only for a few weeks mind you, I don't want to crowd you."
"Then it's settled," Mother Frump stood up. "Morticia, your things are in the car, I'll have your butler bring them in before I leave."
"Good bye Mother," Morticia embraced her mother before heading up the stairs. "Bubbelleh, I'll be waiting in the bedroom if you want to help me unpack."
"Tish! That word!" Gomez bounded up the stairs after his wife.
Mother Frump shook her head, then turned to Fester.
"Make sure you call me as soon as they start having some grandchildren for me."
Fester gave a little salute then glanced up the stairs, "I expect we'll be talking again soon then."
Author's note: I apologize, this isn't the kind of writing I usually like to post, but I just couldn't get this out of my head. Nor could I figure out an interesting way to write it. This is the best I got. I'll probably take it down after a while. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it all the same.