A/Ns: Well. My first attempt at both yaoi and Elricest. I'll warn everyone now, this is currently anywhere from 2-4 (depending on where I break off chapters, that's still under debate)chapters, but has no preplanned plotline. It goes where it wants to, with no thought involved. Subconcious to hands to keyboard to FFN. Actually, I missed a step- it has to get through the wonderful Iarrod, who has agreed to beta-read this story for me. Thank you, Iarrod~! ^^

Disclaimer: I. Own. NOTHING. Not even the computer I'm typing this on. (It's my sister's, in case anyone was wondering...you weren't? Oh...)

These thoughts were wrong, he knew that, but Al couldn't keep that face from appearing in his fantasies. That stunted body, weighed down by two heavy automail limbs. The well-toned, muscled figure he had seen shirtless so many times during their sparring matches, and pantsless during automail reattachments, that he couldn't help but wonder what the rest of him looked like. The parts of him that no little brother should think about in that way. The way that Alphonse couldn't seem to stop dreaming about.

The books all said it was normal for children to want to... explore their bodies, to put it gently, but they said absolutely nothing about sibling relationships. Ever. The first thing that came to mind was the word 'inbreeding', which really didn't apply to the situation. The second was the word 'illegal'.

But dear God, Ed... he was just... perfect. In every way, shape and form, he was everything anyone could ask for. Sure, he was a bit short-tempered sometimes, but that fact just made the blond even more enticing.

Fuck. The heat pooling in his groin should not be there, it was wrong in every sense of the word, wrong, wrong, wrong! The brunette teen curled in on himself, doubled over in an effort to... to... he didn't know, really. The fetal position was one that humans instinctively went to when feeling threatened by something, and these thoughts were threatening enough to induce that instinct, he realized. Hell, they threatened his relationship with his brother already. It wouldn't be long before Al could no longer restrain his urges. This was as far from instinctive as he could get, the logical part of his mind told him. Homosexuality was counterproductive and did nothing to further the species. Therefore it was entirely his own fault that he had fallen hard for his older brother. Alphonse curled in tighter on himself, ignoring the tense pain in his back as he stretched the muscles to their breaking point.

He wished he could go back in time, to when he had first gotten his body back. To when he could explain away these feelings as simply craving human touch, craving the feeling of skin on skin, of being an adolescent male inexperienced with controlling his thoughts and urges. To when his brother would hold him close, hands running along his back, comforting him even though there was nothing wrong. It was impossible, he knew, but the human mind was a hopeful thing.

The almost tentative knock on his door snapped the younger Elric out of his thoughts. He closed his grey-green eyes, trying to gain control of his voice before answering.

"Yes, brother?" 'Oh dear God, please tell me that did not just come out all high and ragged like I thought it did... please, please, please, don't let him find out...' He could hear the slight scrape as Ed's automail shifted backwards, dragging on the floor a bit more than a normal limb would.

"Never mind... I'll tell ya later." Receding footsteps in the direction of the kitchen signaled the elder's leaving. A derisive chuckle escaped Al's throat. How well this situation mirrored life. Ed just always too far away. Always unreachable on his pedestal of perfection.

Ed cursed as he leaned against the counter, fists clenched, nails digging into his flesh palm in some pretense of pain. He hardly noticed the stinging, or the fact that he'd broken skin.
"Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck." With each expletive loosed, his fists grew tighter, knuckles whitening beneath the skin, automail protesting creakily at the unusual amount of pressure. This was wrong, so very wrong. He shouldn't think of Al like that, shouldn't use him like that, even in his own mind, and definitely shouldn't even think of telling his little brother that he had the hots for him. The blond ignored the raging erection he could feel straining against his tight leather pants, trying and failing to think of anything but his perfect, angelic younger brother. For the love of... anything, God, the Gate, he didn't know, but this was wrong. Unbidden, his 17-year-old, hormone-crazed mind threw an image at him, taunting him with the fantasies of his dreams, now supplemented with the breathy, high-pitched voice that had emanated from the younger teen's room. A totally bare Alphonse, prone beneath him, face flushed, breath ragged, calling his name in that tone, the one that drove Ed crazy with lust. The blond bit the inside of his cheek until he tasted blood. No, no, no! He would not think about his little brother that way! Damn it, Al was too innocent, too perfect for him to soil like that! Hell, the boy would run screaming if Ed so much as hinted that he wanted to fuck him!
That was it.
He just wanted to fuck.
A sigh of relief escaped the Elric's mouth. This problem he could deal with much more easily than his earlier, imagined predicament. He hadn't fucked anyone but himself(well, more accurately, his own hand) for so long that his body was taking it out on his little brother, who just happened to be the first person he came in contact with. It would do the same if he saw Hawkeye, Winry, hell, probably even Mustang.
Okay, maybe Mustang was a bit of a stretch, but still! All he needed to do was head down to the Red Light District and let loose. That's what the place was there for, after all. He nodded slowly to himself, deciding this course of action was the most logical and easiest to carry out.

Only after he heard the front door open and close did Alphonse let himself relax. With his brother out of the house, he might be able to collect his thoughts, keep them under tighter rei- his mind, seemingly responding to his desire to not think about such things, produced a tantalizing image: one of the blond who so occupied his thoughts, eyes half-lidded and smoky with desire, arched over him dominantly, bodies closer than they'd ever been before. The brunette shook his head sharply. 'No, no, no! He is my older brother, not my boyfriend, and that's absolutely impossible!' Sometimes he could swear he heard the symbolic angel and devil of his conscience arguing.
'Doesn't mean the two need to be separate.'
'Don't think about that! It's not right!'
'You're already a sinner, what's one more strike against you?'
'There's almost no chance that he feels the same way!'
'The chance is still there.'
'It's unlikely enough that you're romantically attracted to your brother, unlikelier still that he would be attracted to you!'
'He's just as messed up as you are; you know that.'
'Doesn't mean his mind's as screwed up as yours!' Al shook his head, trying to ignore the voices, and decided a drink might do him some good. Seeing as his brother wasn't in the house anyways, there was no chance of him having to explain his odd tone earlier.
'Yeah, just thinking about how I shouldn't be in love with you. Nothing major.' He snorted, shaking his head as he walked into the kitchen. Hopeless. He was completely hopeless. A note stuck on the fridge with one of the plain, silver-backed magnets caught his attention.
Needed someone to do, went to RLD. See ya tomorrow morning. Ed. Just before his brother's scrawled signature, something had been completely blacked out with the pen, something obviously not meant to be read, or probably written at all.
'See? Red Light. If he liked you, he would've come to you. End of story.' The 'demon' persona grumbled but remained otherwise silent. At the same time joyful and depressed, due to this clean-cut new logic, Al shook his head and got himself a glass of water.