Author's Note: Yeah, this is my first fanfiction.. on fanfiction. net lol. But anyway, I don't own any of the characters from Harry Potter (J.K. Rowling has that honor). And this is just meant for humor.

Voldemort and Harry Potter decide to become buddies.

This starts just before the Sixth Year, during summer.

Buddies

Becoming Buddies

Harry Potter was stunned. Absolutely shocked. What do you say when Voldemort asks for a truce? He thought he was dreaming, but no. Voldemort was still waiting for an answer, staring creepily at Harry in the alley where he had jumped Harry in hopes of ending this whole war going on between them.

"Er...," was all Harry could say. He still had his wand brandished in belief that Voldemort was going to try the killing curse any second now. "Er..."

"Harry Potter," Voldemort hissed, "We could be great together..." It sounded a lot like what he had said in Harry's first year in front of the Mirror. "We could..." Voldemort suddenly slacked, gathering his breath in defeat. Then, in a voice unlike what Voldemort had used before, he said, "Dude, seriously. Aren't you tired of me killing off everyone you care about?" It was a deep voice, bored, and it dissipated any type of evil intelligence his previous high pitched voice held. It startled Harry even more.

"Er... why would I become.. buddies with you," Harry finally asked eerily.

"Uh," Voldemort said slowly, and then he pulled out a chocolate frog from his robe. "Candy?"

Harry hesitated, but then the pull of chocolate was far too strong for him. "Okay," he responded with a shrug, and took the chocolate frog from Voldemort. It tasted like sin. Or maybe that was just psychological. There was an awkward hesitation in which Harry sat down on the sidewalk, followed by Voldemort.

"So, uh... no hard feelings about Sirius, right," Voldemort asked slowly.

Harry thought for a moment, and was about to yell at him, but then Voldemort handed over another chocolate frog. "Nah, man," Harry responded in compliance.

"And, uh... no hard feelings about Cedric, too, right," Voldemort asked.

"No, seriously, he was a bit of a jerk anyway... besides, I heard he became a vampire," Harry stated.

"Huh, sweet," Voldemort replied, slowly easing his way into this buddy situation. "And... no hard feelings about.."

"I swear to God if you mention my parents," Harry interrupted violently. There was a pause.

"Okay, we'll ease into that later," Voldemort stated slowly.

Harry felt a bit bad, but he let it go. "So... you know eventually one of us is going to kill the other, right," Harry asked Voldemort. He assumed this would be the point Voldemort would turn on him. But Harry always had the perfect way to kill Voldemort when necessary. Just tackle any wand he has out of the way and bash his head in with a heavy object. But he also was planning on getting a gun soon, figuring no wand could stop a bullet. Only Neo could.

"Pff, man, like that's important," Voldemort scoffed. There was another awkward pause, but then Voldemort turned to Harry. "Hey, wanna go egg Snape's house?"

"Hells yeah," Harry said, and Voldemort put up his hand in a high five. Harry just stared at him dully.

"Too early for that? Right..," Volemort shrugged it off without a second thought as the new buddies ran to the store to buy some eggs.