A/N I was discussing this idea with another author (CrazyNut2002), and she said I should write it. So that's what I'm doing. Feel free to laugh, cry, do a dance, and review.

Disclaimer: I don't own the Princess Diaries, MIB, and half this story was thought up by CrazyNut2002. This fic only exists because I am taking part in the Freaky Fic Project, 2002.

Setting: Agents J and K are standing at the top of a cliff, looking cool in their MIB suits, and Frank... well, he's having a nap. Surrounding them were really ugly aliens with green, snake-like skin covering their legs, and slime oozing out of their bloated stomachs and heads.

Chapter 1- From the files of the MIB

Agent J, you take the mini-cannon gun, (A/N, I don't know what that cute little gun is called) and I'll have this baby, Agent K fingered his shiny new Machine-gun.

Dangerously near, a group of man-sized, exceedingly ugly aliens roared, and tried to get a bite of agent K.

Normally, J would've laughed himself sick, but these aliens were no joke. He contented himself by firing blast after blast of his mini-cannon gun, enjoying it's overwhelming power. Out the corner of his eye, he watched K expertly firing round after round at the aliens.

Soon, there were only two aliens left. K looked desperate. He cried. I've run out of ammunition! Uh-oh. Now what? Doing his best to sound reassuring, he said, Don't worry, partner, I'll finish them off. He blasted the alien in front of him, tearing a huge hole in it's stomach, causing it to shriek and die almost instantly. But, forgetting how close he was to the alien, did a slight miscalculation, and the impact of the mini-cannon gun sent him flying backwards...

...and down the cliff, into the waters below. K shouted from above. Frustrated and powerless, -knowing his life might end anytime soon- J fired his mini-cannon gun at the waters beneath him, sending himself shooting back up and onto the cliff from which he had fallen. Landing on the one remaining alien, and not daring to fire the overkill weapon in his hand, J punched and kicked it for all he was worth, finally giving up, and kicking it overboard instead.

J ran to the befallen Agent K, and tried to shake him awake. The only response was a groan, as K clutched his chest, where his heart was. Frantically checking him, (A/N That is NOT meant to be sick, to all those with polluted minds) J discovered that his partner had been clawed, from the chest to his back. He wasn't going to make it.

I know, K said to J. It's quite obvious... He coughed up some blood, then continued. It's...why I was fit to....join....the MIB. I.....had no......fa....family, so my......death......could go ......unnoticed. And with that, he fell into the clutches of death. Agent J stared. Where were the thanks for being a great partners? It was strange how K, even at his moment of death, could waste his breath on a little lesson. Performing the eye-closing ritual, he gathered K's limp, (but somewhat heavy) body in his arms, and headed for the safest way back to normal ground level.

~The following week, and at the MIB HQ~

Agent J, you must find another partner, that's three times already that you nearly died, if not for our men finding you. I do not wish to have spies following you, and to ensure my peace of mind, you must find a new partner. And that's final. With that, Agent Z walked off, uninterested in Agent J's many protests.

J sighed. He had to find a way to meet lots of new people, because he really didn't care to spend too much time searching. Agent K had been buried at a 3-hour funeral, given by the MIB, and everyone there had attended. J himself had cried (though he was loathe to admit it), and everyone had stayed a little while after the funeral. Now his partner, and (he admitted to himself,) best friend was gone, and he'd have to spend... possibly hours searching for a new partner.

Then he got a brainwave, and knew just what he had to do.

A/N So how was that? All this stuff is kinda hard to write... I might have to read some Horowitz for inspiration. But those who know me can PROBABLY tell that's only an excuse! :D
Oh, and don't worry, because this really has something to do with the Princess Diaries.