Do I?
I've been teased about something for the past few weeks. It's probably been a month or so by now, actually. It seemed preposterous at the time, when things were still fresh and new, but after recently talking to Rein… As awful as she is, she isn't always wrong, I guess. In fact…she probably cares about me a lot. That's what Dameon says, at least.
Dameon…
How could this have happened? That peanut-brain, jarhead, vegetable… For months, Cura fangirled about whatever was "between us", stating that she could "smell love from a mile away". There's nothing about Dameon to love, nothing at all! He's a hard-headed drunk that only cares about preserving the past! …Yeah, that's what I thought in the beginning. Lately, though…my mind has really been changing about him. All of a sudden, my thoughts aren't so harsh and full of malice. I call him rude names less and less. Suddenly, without warning, he turns up in my dreams and replaces my nightmares with…with happiness.
Could it be that I…?
"Give me the bottle, Dameon," I hissed out, eyes glaring angrily towards Dameon. He had been drinking again, half conscious, and drooping towards the floor from his chair. His brown hair was messier than usual, and he was wearing his regular attire as if he was about to go out.
"How'sabout…..no," he waved me off with lazy, unfocused eyes. He didn't look like he was going to be giving up that bottle anytime soon as he took another swig of it and attempted to fix himself against the chair, nearly falling over in the process.
I sighed heavily while scratching my head full of messy, tangled curls that fell along my body to my hips, and offered my other hand. It was too late in the night to have to be dealing with this crap and I was still in my bed clothes with little, blue bunny slippers on my feet. The initial reason I had gotten up and out of my room was to get some water from the fridge, but when I noticed that Dameon wasn't in his own bed, I got curious and here I found Dameon nearly passed out in the dining room.
"You're pissed drunk, idiot. Give me the bottle," I spoke, taking a step closer, "Or will I have to take it from you?"
"Take it from me…?" Dameon grew silent before bursting into cold laughter. "Take it from me. Really? Go back to bed, Princess, it's not your place to play with big boys and their belongings."
I was getting irritated, and fast.
"Listen, you," I shouted bitterly, "this is the fourth fuckin' time this week that I've found you drunk as a bard like you have nothing to fuckin' live for!"
I drew closer to him, just about nose to nose, with a challenging expression on my face. I could smell the liquor on his breath as he glared at me just as intensely as I was glaring at him.
"Hand over that damn bottle…"
Dameon smacked my hand away as he rose to his feet with a stagger and began walking off.
"Get lost, Princess."
"Dameon, please…!" I yelled out, almost timidly, like I was in distress. I surprised myself with how weak I had sound just then, and knew that it may have caught Dameon off guard. I never showed weakness before – not consciously.
The second I yelled out, Dameon paused in his steps with a slight stagger, most likely due to his drunken state. I mentally cursed myself for yelling like how I did, for I didn't know what to say next. What was he expecting me to say? Something rude? Something clever? Something…unexpected…?
"I…," is how I began. Again, weak.
"Make it quick, I've got more alcohol sitting around doing nothing," he grumbled, sounding as if he didn't want to hear what I had to say, but was also interested in my change of character. This was going to be anything but easy.
"I… Uhm. Dameon… I…," I was at a loss for words, that's what I was.
"What?!"
I love you…!
"I care about you…!" I yelled at the top of my lungs as if to literally blow him away. Every muscle in my body tightened in anticipation because I had no idea how this would end.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck! I mentally punched myself over and over and over. How could I say something like that so openly?! Ah, mother of Arceus…
"Yeah, you and everyone else here," Dameon's voice finally cut through the silence. "Anything else before I take my leave?"
I sighed deeply again. This time was different, however, as it wasn't out of annoyance, but in preparation to calm my rampaging nerves. Here I go…
"N-no, Dameon…," I took two steps forward, scratching my head with one hand while using the other to press against my chest. My heart was hammering away as if it wanted to jump right out… "No… This… This is a lot different…"
"Yeah?" his sarcasm was evident in his tone, "I suppose it is, as your kind of care seems to be fighting with me, arguing with me, degrading me. All those sorts, am I right?"
He's much more hostile than usual. I came to the conclusion that the alcohol was the reason for it. I can't tell if this is an exaggeration of how he feels or if this is how he really feels. With my silence, Dameon took that as a cue to continue, not looking back at me for a second.
"The people who seem like they care about me are everyone else around you, and guess what?" he paused for a moment, "They probably don't even care about me! Hah! How's that for a change of mind?"
"Dameon, that's not true. You know it's not –"
"And you're supposed to change my mind about that? You of all people?" Dameon lashed at me with his words every chance he got. I couldn't lie; they were actually starting to sting. He finally turned to me, but what I didn't expect was the torture in his eyes. "The people that really cared about me, the ones I knew cared about me, at least, are all gone. Get it? Gone."
"Wrong," was all I could mutter out. I broke into a small giggle as I continued, "Wrong, wrong, wrong. Wrong, you are, sir."
Dameon clicked his tongue in annoyance, and turned around to walk away, "I don't have time for thi- Oof...!"
Before he could take a full stride forward, I wrapped my slender arms around Dameon, holding him tightly and in place, as if life depended on this hold.
"No. No way. I'm not letting go, Dameon," I told him with a firm, yet gentle, tone. "Not this time. I can't."
"What in the…," he began. "What do you think you're-?"
"If I let go, I won't see you again, right?" I asked him, casually, knowing he'd understand. "Right, Dameon? Just like in the letter that you wrote to us."
"…," he didn't mutter a single word. He was caught.
"I found the letter, Dameon… It was by accident that I found it so early," I said softly, before chuckling a bit, "Good thing, right? I wouldn't have been able to stop you."
"You're not going to stop me," Dameon said, grabbing onto one of my arms and trying to pull himself free, "Now, let go."
"I can't do that," I held tighter, not planning on giving up to Dameon… or giving up on Dameon.
"Get the fuck off of me!"
Dameon pulled himself free, and pushed me pretty hard so that I'd be enough distance away from him, almost falling over. What the hell's gotten into him? He's never been so drunk that he'd actually-
"You're a fuckin' idiot, Dameon!" I screamed, taking a hard step forward. My rising anger caused a slight tremor in the ground. "You're a big, fuckin' jarhead idiot!"
"Stay out of my way, Princess," he sourly spoke as his eyes narrowed to a point at which I could barely see the slits of his eyes. "You want to lead the team? Now you can have it all to yourself."
"I don't want it to myself!" I yelled once more, harshly, as I grabbed his forearm to stall him further. I wanted him to hear me out, for real. "I want –"
Do I really?
The next moment, Dameon threw me with just the brute force of his hands to the other side of the room. I crashed into the glass coffee table, shattering it to pieces, before slamming into the wall, and slumping down, having all of the glass chinaware fall and break everywhere around me. I looked up at Dameon with disbelief completely taking over my expression as he looked down on me, almost fidgeting a bit, with a look of surprise on his own face. I glared up at him as intensely as I could, but my eyes became misty fairly quick, and I couldn't cover it up anymore.
I do…
"I-I just…," I began strong as the tears finally spilled down my flushed cheeks. As the moments passed, my voice became a sad whisper, "I just wanted to love you…"
A/N: Hello, my wolves~ It's been a reaaally long time, huh? While I'm depriving my babies of Time of Courage, random stories and ideas drop into my head while I do my very long and complicated physics homework. This is one of the ideas that actually made it to the end heehee. It pretty much wrote itself, to be honest haha. I genuinely enjoyed writing this and, although I intended for this little piece to be a one-shot, it might become a two-shot. Because I can.
Those who have read Time of Courage will know the characters being used as:
Michka Morre (FiammaJoule)
Dameon Blackburn (CaptainPrice)
Reinforce Yukimura (Silverdragon98)(mentioned)
School is almost out for me, so that's something to look forward to, as I'll have much more time on my hands. Not only that, Time of Courage's anniversary is coming up in almost two months, which means something special dahahah. And right after Time of Courage's anniversary, it'll be my own birthday~ Whoop whoop, still not the drinking age, but that's okay! (I don't drink, nor do I like alcohol *fistpumping*).
(I just realized that I forgot to re-include the part with the Pokemon, but it was too awkward, so I omitted it. That'll be in Part 2 [if there is a Part 2], so be cool, everyone, be cool~)
Until next time, my sweets~
-FiammaJoule
