Okay. I… really don't have much of a backstory for this thing as to why it exists. It kind of just came to me? I guess? I don't know! All I can tell you is when I started watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Netflix a few months ago and saw the title for the very first episode the song "Welcome to the Club" slammed into the forefront of my twisted mind and eventually twisted into this convoluted parody. So there ya go.
On a lesser note, this will probably be the ONLY thing I contribute to the Buffy fandom other than my membership of it. Luckily for you guys I like Buffy but I don't like it enough to make any sort of eye-bleed-inducing fanfiction for it. So this will be the only thing you get from me. Then again, I said the same thing about the 'Shake it Off' parody I did for Transformers. That thing is now turning into a book of parodied songs…. So who really knows about this?
Enjoy!
Welcome to the Hellmouth
You moved here
To find a normal life:
To escape
All the stress and strife.
"No more
"Vampires to slay,"
You pray.
This town—
Sunnydale—seems nice.
Friendly,
Normal, and just right.
Just wait
Till after light of day.
Hey-ey….
Welcome to the Hellmouth
Where the demons come out!
Grab your crossbow and your stakes.
You're living right on Hell's front gate!
Welcome to the Hellmouth!
You defend the world now
From the Apocalypse
And supernatural shi…
Welcome to the Hellmouth!
There is no escape now!
Make the best of what you can.
Hey, at least you've made some friends.
Welcome to the Hellmouth!
Foil the Master's plans now!
He wants to rise again,
And that's a bad bargain.
So ya better go stop him!
Better go stop him!
On the Hellmouth.
On the Hellmouth.
Right there,
In shadows, he stands—
A handsome and most mysterious man.
Who's he?
What does he want with you?
Ooh-ooh.
(He's a vampire too!)
Welcome to the Hellmouth
Where the demons come out!
Grab your crossbow and your stakes.
You're living right on Hell's front gate!
Welcome to the Hellmouth!
You defend the world now
From the Apocalypse
And supernatural shi…
Welcome to the Hellmouth!
There is no escape now!
Make the best of what you can.
Hey, at least you've made some friends.
Welcome to the Hellmouth!
Foil the Master's plans now!
He wants to rise again,
And that's a bad bargain.
So ya better go stop him!
"I'm the Slayer."
Here on the Hellmouth is my destiny.
At least I won't be totally lonely.
Giles is here.
My friends are here.
Plus hundreds of vamps and demons are here!
I'm the Slayer.
(Slay 'em all!)
I'm the Slayer.
(Slay 'em all.)
Patrol, and slay, then go to the Bronze.
We go to the Bronze!
Go to the Bronze!
On the Hellmouth.
SLAY.
On the Hellmouth.
(Take 'em all out!)
Welcome to the Hellmouth
Where the demons come out!
Grab your crossbow and your stakes.
You're living right on Hell's front gate!
Welcome to the Hellmouth!
You just saved the world now!
Celebrate while you can.
Enjoy yourself and then
You'll do it all again.