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A plane and a runway
By Devilry
It all happened so quickly.
There was never a man who had professed his feelings towards Aoi before, and she never thought there would be one. It was not that she thought herself unattractive; all her life, the many stories of love and courtship just seemed so far away.
So what was she supposed to do when a world of blushes and confessions and relentless poundings in her heart just showed up at her doorstep one morning when the Astronomy Channel was down? It was hardly fair to ask her to play this game. Where was the invitation letter, the rulebook, the game master who excused himself and never came back?
And to complicate things, this two-player game suddenly expanded to become a game for three. Who ever heard of such things? If a game developer wanted to add new content to please his customers, he would add new sounds, maps, options and abilities, but he would not change its entire premise.
And yet, she was expected to play. Once a game for two, now a game for three, where there could be any number of winners, but someone had to lose, because nobody's ever heard of a win-win-win game.
It was hardly fair to ask her to play this game.
The other two players – both were men who were confident, strong, caring, energetic, with just a little bit of chivalry. Their character roles, however, were completely different. The first one had declared his intention right from the beginning. He wanted her, and would settle for no one else. The other was... well, far more clueless about the rules than even she was.
And now she had come to the point where she was forced to make a choice between the two. Not in words or actions – and that was something she was grateful for – but in heart. It was impossible for her to try to like them both. This was not two games for two. It was one game for three. She had to choose one over the other.
She already had feelings for one of the two, but how could she be sure it was not merely a matter of circumstance? She met one before the other, fell for one before the other, experienced so much more with one before the other even entered her life. If the dice that dictated the order in which the players entered the game had willed differently, could she still say with confidence that she would feel the same way?
The first man had shown an extreme willingness to love her no matter what she did. No matter what kind of sudden twist he saw in her personality. Each time, he only claimed to fall for her even more. Was this what it meant to truly love her? His dedication was unquestionable, like the fairy tales many girls grew up with.
The second man had far stronger ideas about who she was and what she meant to him. These were not things he would ever voice, but every small interaction between them let her know that he treasured her companionship. He was there for her just as much as she was there for him.
Who to choose? It did not seem like an easy choice - or was it?
Having grown up distrusting men, Aoi knew that she wanted a man who would forcefully break down her walls of preconceived notions. She wanted a man who would prove that she could trust him from the bottom of her heart, who was neither a destroyer nor a possessor, but a lover. She wanted a man who did not simply see her in terms of her sexuality, her appearance, her awkwardness towards love and romance, her power as the ex-leader of the Red Tails, all the characteristics she had that classified her under a particular group of attractive woman. She wanted a man who did not see her as a means to something else, be it personal achievement or social recognition or anything else to pet his overinflated egos.
She wanted a man who saw her as a woman. Just a woman, and nothing else.
And that was why, no matter how much she admired the first man for his ability to love her, she felt that she could never bring herself to love him back. If he loved her no matter who she was, then how could she be sure that he loved her for who she was? How could she be sure that she was the good ending to his game, and not just the solution to unlocking the good ending? He was a true gentleman beyond doubt, but a gentleman in the old-fashioned way who was unable to see her as a woman with her own desires, aggressions, ires, lusts and conflicts.
It was true that the other man had yet to express any interest in her beyond being just friends. But he saw her as many things more than just a potential date. He saw her as his very first park debut, the queen of Ishiyama High, an odd acquaintance over the summer break, the captain of his volleyball team, his training partner on Mapputatsu and Decapitation Island, and his comrade in the battle against Behemoth's 34 Pillar Division. He saw her as an individual with a wealth of personal experiences that set her apart from any other person in the universe. He saw her not as society's definition of an attractive woman, but as Aoi Kunieda (and maybe a little Kunie). Each time she changed, for better or for worse, he let her know that it mattered. But he never stopped treasuring her, and he never stopped trusting her. He was the one who saw her as a woman, and just a woman. Nothing else.
Aiba was good at playing the game, but that was his exact flaw. Aoi did not want to be courted as though she were in a game. She was a woman, not a woman in a game, and it took far more than familiarisation with the rules of courtship to win her heart. He was not half-bad, but he had a long way to go before he was ready to love a woman, and he was ready for a woman to love him. In the mean time her heart would continue to belong to Oga, but not before leaving Aiba with a particularly valuable lesson.
"When you come back, I'll be trying to win you over again." He told her at the airport just before she left. Aoi unwittingly let out a laugh. Surely he did not think the same approach would work twice?
"All right. But I have someone I like, you know." She told him. Not 'no', for it would have been unfair of her not to tell him why he lost, but 'I have someone I like, you know.', because she wanted him to discover what Oga had something he lacked. Aiba was funny and good-spirited, and she would love to see how he would grow.
Inevitably, there was cruel irony to those words, for therein lay a new game to play. It was a race to see if Aiba could come back to contest for her heart once again, before she quit the game altogether and got together with Oga in the real world.
Just a little one shot that summarises my thoughts on why I support AoixOga and not AoixAiba. AoixAiba doesn't really allow for Aoi's character to develop further. He is so ready to accept her and declare his love for her that I can't help but wonder just what exactly she means to him. Not that I really dislike Aiba that much, but I echo the sentiment in my story that he's trying to rush a relationship with Aoi even though he simply doesn't know her well enough to love her as much as he says he does just yet.
In the end, it's that little extra straightforwardness Oga has that gives him my vote :)
Reviews & Replies
FlamingLexus:
Oh gosh Devilry, I've read your profile and it feels like I'm looking at a mirror of myself. But I didn't come here just to say that; I've read all of your Beelzebub work and I think they're all fantastic! You've got a masterful command of the English language and it's clear from your work that you've put a lot of thought and effort into writing these. It's something that I really, truly appreciate and it makes me want to jump in and write something myself.
As for this story in particular, as I've said I can see just how much thought you've put into Aoi's character; you explain her thoughts clearly, eloquently and in a way that does justice to her character. I came away from this feeling like I understand Aoi much better; the contrast you've noted between Aiba and Oga makes so much sense... I can go on and on but when it comes down to it, you do incredible work and I'm so happy that someone is taking the time to create these masterpieces for Aoi (and helping my Beelzebub withdrawal symptoms).
I'm definitely looking forward to more of your work!
Reply:
Oh wow, hey, do you by any chance happen to be a guy?
I mean, I'm just trying to make a (poor) inference based on your very first sentence. It's quite a big deal for me if you are, because most of my more vocal readers are girls. As much as I'm glad I have their support, I also want to know what other guys think.
If you're not, and I'm just getting ahead of myself, then oh well xD Can I interest you in yugioh maybe? We need more girls playing that game.
I'm really happy that I've been able to give you new insight on the characters. It's truly extraordinary how little Beelzebub says, but how much meaning can be embedded in it. It's even more extraordinary that Beelzebub sets out, first and foremost, to be a gag manga.
I mean, Beelzebub is just like 'hey im gunna give u plenty of laughs but just in case thats not enough then ok lemme give u better characterisation than 90% of serious mangas out there' without even breaking a sweat.