The Flower Girl
Rating: PG ( for suicide)
Summary: Cloud reflects on his lost love, and decides he wants to join her.
Author's Note: I don't normally write stuff this dark, nor do I think Cloud would actually do this, but it was an idea I got in my English class while listening to BORING essays being read, so I went with the idea. As always, read and review! Thanks!
~x~
I stand in the church where I first met her. I watch her spirit straighten her rows of flowers and feel a tear roll down my cheek.
'They say you can't grow trees or flowers in Midgar, but the flowers have no difficulty growing here.'
"Yes, that is a mystery...But perhaps it's because you were here, caring for them just like you've cared for us." I speak to myself- the kids have long left. It's surprising that her flowers have stayed at all.
Why was I so stupid? Why did I just stand there? Why the hell didn't I help her? He was right there, I could have knocked him away. Why didn't I? WHY DIDN'T I?
It's because I couldn't move. I remember I tried moving. I tried moving toward her, to embrace her, to protect her, to defeat him while I still could. I wanted to keep her safe from all harm, but I failed.
Hojo was right. I am a failure. I defeated Sephiroth, but I still am a failure. I failed to protect the woman I love.
Why didn't I try harder? I could have revived her...why didn't I?
I needed to protect my heart, it was easily trampled on. I hope Tifa enjoyed it, because I didn't. I let her use me because I was hurting. It sounds silly, but I just laid there, shut my eyes, and thought of Aeris. Everything was all right when she was there - she made everything happy and fun. Oh, I want to be with her!
"I will be with you soon Aeris, just you wait!"
The world is cruel. I never used to hate life, I just hated people. Life has laughed at me. It took someone who I managed to fall in love with and stole them from me. I don't know how I can ever go on without you now.
I won't. It's final. I'm not happy here. I am only happy with her. I think of the night we shared at Gold Saucer. It was phenominal, it was unbelievable, it was earth-shaking. No, I'm not talking about the date, although that was great too. What she did afterward came as a surprise. But it was very welcome and I wonder what it would be like if we hadn't done what we did.
Oh, how have I made it like this? How have I made it this far without failing?
...
I've denied it for a long time now, but it's kind of hard to hide. I've never been in love with anyone before, let alone someone who died months before I realized what was going on, but I am. I am in love with the one person who saved us all.
So this is it. This is my final good bye. I'm sorry for the pain I've caused the world, and my friends whom I'm leaving behind. I'll miss you, but I'll be in a better place. Take care of Tifa, I don't want her doing anything drastic...I really do care about her...she was always a good friend.
I'm leaving now. I regret to say you will never see me again, and I'm sorry for that. Live life to the fullest and don't make the mistakes I have made. Never deny love. You never know when it's too late. Live. Love. You will be happy, and now I will finally be because I'm with her.
Farewell.
Rating: PG ( for suicide)
Summary: Cloud reflects on his lost love, and decides he wants to join her.
Author's Note: I don't normally write stuff this dark, nor do I think Cloud would actually do this, but it was an idea I got in my English class while listening to BORING essays being read, so I went with the idea. As always, read and review! Thanks!
~x~
I stand in the church where I first met her. I watch her spirit straighten her rows of flowers and feel a tear roll down my cheek.
'They say you can't grow trees or flowers in Midgar, but the flowers have no difficulty growing here.'
"Yes, that is a mystery...But perhaps it's because you were here, caring for them just like you've cared for us." I speak to myself- the kids have long left. It's surprising that her flowers have stayed at all.
Why was I so stupid? Why did I just stand there? Why the hell didn't I help her? He was right there, I could have knocked him away. Why didn't I? WHY DIDN'T I?
It's because I couldn't move. I remember I tried moving. I tried moving toward her, to embrace her, to protect her, to defeat him while I still could. I wanted to keep her safe from all harm, but I failed.
Hojo was right. I am a failure. I defeated Sephiroth, but I still am a failure. I failed to protect the woman I love.
Why didn't I try harder? I could have revived her...why didn't I?
I needed to protect my heart, it was easily trampled on. I hope Tifa enjoyed it, because I didn't. I let her use me because I was hurting. It sounds silly, but I just laid there, shut my eyes, and thought of Aeris. Everything was all right when she was there - she made everything happy and fun. Oh, I want to be with her!
"I will be with you soon Aeris, just you wait!"
The world is cruel. I never used to hate life, I just hated people. Life has laughed at me. It took someone who I managed to fall in love with and stole them from me. I don't know how I can ever go on without you now.
I won't. It's final. I'm not happy here. I am only happy with her. I think of the night we shared at Gold Saucer. It was phenominal, it was unbelievable, it was earth-shaking. No, I'm not talking about the date, although that was great too. What she did afterward came as a surprise. But it was very welcome and I wonder what it would be like if we hadn't done what we did.
Oh, how have I made it like this? How have I made it this far without failing?
...
I've denied it for a long time now, but it's kind of hard to hide. I've never been in love with anyone before, let alone someone who died months before I realized what was going on, but I am. I am in love with the one person who saved us all.
So this is it. This is my final good bye. I'm sorry for the pain I've caused the world, and my friends whom I'm leaving behind. I'll miss you, but I'll be in a better place. Take care of Tifa, I don't want her doing anything drastic...I really do care about her...she was always a good friend.
I'm leaving now. I regret to say you will never see me again, and I'm sorry for that. Live life to the fullest and don't make the mistakes I have made. Never deny love. You never know when it's too late. Live. Love. You will be happy, and now I will finally be because I'm with her.
Farewell.