AN: So it's been forever since I've uploaded anything but I have time over the summer and idea's in my head so why not. This is not Age of Ultron compatible but can totally be a haven for you if you don't like bruceX natasha ( I don't diss the pairing in this story but I know a lot of people aren't crazy about it). Obviously I don't own the Avengers ( though I wish I did). Please be gentle with me- it's been a while and I may be rusty at first. I'm the only one making these spelling mistakes kids so enjoy them. Harley is mine 3
Tony was in his lab as usual when his phone started to ring
Boy, I will be your sexy silk
Wrap me around, 'round, 'round, 'round
I'll be your pussycat licking at your-
"What do you want Harley?" Tony muttered trying to balance his phone against his ear with his shoulder as he tackled a particularly expensive piece of equipment for his suit.
"Tony baby! I would think you might be happy to hear from me considering I'm back in New York" Harley joked as she strode confidently down the busy sidewalk- her heels clicking loudly with every step.
"When you say you're in New York please tell me you mean you're staying in the village with other wacky bohemian writers discussing ridiculous sex positions and smoking lots of pot" he said as he glanced over at a mildly concerned Bruce who was tinkering away at his own lab table across the room.
"No honey I mean I can see the tower up close and personal- god you'd think Pepper would have made sure you made it less gaudy this time around but I guess not- why Tony do you not want my charming company?" She teased as she approached the entrance to the tower.
"How close are you? I'll tell Jarvis to let you in" he muttered while trying to make his damn suit cooperate
"Thank you, I'll have him point me in your direction. See you soon" She said hanging up before he could say another word.
Harley was 35 now and as disgustingly successful as she could ever have imagined- what had started as a desire to be a doctor had somehow become writing self help books about sex, and damn if those didn't sell. So there she was- dressed in Channel with stunning black leather Christian Louboutin pumps clicking against the stone floors that now led to Stark Industries' updated labs.
"Tony Stark put down your big shiny metal suit and come give me a hug, do you know how many times Pepper has called me panicked that you're going to get yourself blown up? I figured it was time to give you a motherly talking to" Harley chastised as she wrapped her arms around her old friend
"Harley you're 5 years younger than I am and you smoke pot with hippie authors between writing cheep books for women who's husbands can't make them cum" Tony sneered as he tried to get out of her hug
"First of all- I don't smoke pot between books I have no idea where you got that idea considering you were the first person to ever get me stoned- which no we can't do- Pepper will kill us and I can't handle myself stoned anymore. Secondly those women need to know how to find their g-spot and how to have open conversations with their partner about clitoral stimulation. No one should ever fake an orgasm- it's sacrilege." Suddenly Harley noticed an attractive man sitting behind a desk in the corner with lightly tanned skin and wispy black hair. "Oh! I'm sorry you must be Dr. Bruce Banner- Tony's told me great things.
"Tony says nice things about me?" Bruce asked shyly with a hint of wit
"Oh of course- I mean he tells a lot of terribly stupid stories of trying to jab you with lab equipment but somewhere in there he definitely complimented you as a scientist, I joke that you guys are science bros all the time" Harley teased as she walked over to the doctor
"Harley! you weren't supposed to tell him about science bros. Go find a room for yourself, Jarvis can help you, I have science-y stuff to do that you wouldn't understand" He said sticking out his tongue and going back over to his suit.
"Well doctor what floor do you have?" Harley asked turning her attention back to the doctor as she leaned over his table- exposing her sizeable cleavage should he decide to indulge
"I have my own floor for …safety reasons" Bruce mumbled without making eye contact
" Well I don't know anyone else and everyone here could also kill me without batting an eye. Plus I'm not going anywhere near Tony and Pepper's penthouse- they fuck like rabbits having an asthma attack. Seriously it's disturbing- and I write books telling menopausal women how to make masturbation a normal and fun part of their lives. Please Bruce I'll stay out your way and I promise not to try and stab you with things for shits and giggles like Tony. Please?" Harley begged sinking lower onto the table and emphasizing her cleavage even more. This time Bruce gave her cleavage a quick glance before nodding.
"Thank you! I'll have Jarvis guide me, you're a lifesaver" Harley giggled throwing her arms around the shy scientist, Bruce- not being used to hugs -immediately stiffened.
Harley realized immediately how uncomfortable Bruce was and pulled back quickly mumbling an apology before dashing out of the labs. Once she felt she was out of sight she looked back and saw Bruce struggling to adjust his pants- as if they had suddenly gotten a bit too tight in the crotch. So while the hug had thrown him off his guard- he didn't have a totally negative reaction to her presence.
"Good" She thought to herself as she skipped playfully towards the elevator.
so it's meh? I hope you're at least intrigued. I promise it'll get better. I'm actually studying psychology and doing a minor in sexuality and the sex books are what some of my friends joke that I'll end up doing. Gotta agree with Harley- Never fake an orgasm. Review and let me know what you think 3
-psychological smut by night