Hey guys. This is my very first published fanfic and I'm not really sure how I feel about it. I would love any kind of feedback and I really want to know what y'all think. so without further ado, here is my view on how the series should have continued in the Twilight sequel New Moon.
Disclaimer: I DO NOT own these characters, just some of the story line. The characters and some of the themes belong to Mrs. Stephine Meyers.
Pain is just an experience. It can be physical or emotional. Pain takes your confidence and steals it away to the point where you question the security of everything around you. It makes you want to curl up and never feel again. People will do whatever they have to in order to get away from pain.
I felt pain. But not just pain. I felt my heart being ripped out of my chest, my soul being crushed, my head cracking in half. I felt the worst pain of all; abandonment. I felt abandoned. I felt broken. He didn't want me anymore. He didn't want me. He left. They left.
For months I couldn't sleep. I couldn't eat. I couldn't talk. I couldn't function. I went to school, i went to work, i went home. I didn't socialize. I shut down. I shut everyone out. Every thought in my brain was consumed by him. He was always there. When I close my eyes, i see his face. The perfect bone structure. The bronze hair. The pale skin. The golden eyes. I could smell his intoxicating scent. I could feel his intimidating presence.
I didn't miss my school friends, not really. I only really cared for Angela. She has been supportive through all of this. But not Jessica. To be honest, she's a serious bitch. She has hated me ever since I moved back here because I was the only person who caught his attention and I am the infatuation of Mike. And Mike has just been more clingy than ever. He didn't understand. None of them did. But I did miss one friend more than anyone can imagine. I miss his garage. His woodsy smell. His boyish smile. I miss the one person that has been there for me as long as I can remember. I haven't seen him since we went to the movies with Mike. I miss Jake like crazy. But he hasn't called since then. And I wasn't in a place to reach out to him.
Charlie eventually cracked down on me. Told me to get out of the house. So I did. As I drove to the reservation, I realized just how bad had gotten. How this must have killed Charlie. Finally, I pull up in front of the little red house that has been a second home to me ever since i was born. I hear a loud ruckus inside the house and a lumbering bear of a man steps out of the tiny door.
We just stare at one another in shock. Him at my being there. Me at his appearance. Jacob Black had changed. Long gone is the young boy who has been my best friend since we were in diapers. More than six inches taller than he was the last time i saw him, Jacob's 6'7 tall body now towers nearly a foot over me. He is muscular in every single place on his body. His long hair is now cropped short. Despite the 70 degree weather, he wears nothing but a pair or cutoff jean shorts. And he has a tattoo on his shoulder. And if we're going to be honest here, Jacob is hot.
But that didn't matter. I just needed my best friend. It felt like I would explode if I didn't get closer to him. And he seemed to feel it too. In three long strides, he was down the ramp and was wrapping me up in his arms. His body was unusually warm but I just ignored it. Wrapping my arms around him, I buried my face in the crook of his neck. I didn't even realize I was crying until I felt hot tears soaking my shirt.
"I missed you," i whisper. "I missed you too, Bells." Jake sets me down and holds me at arm's length. "Are you okay?," he asks me quietly. I just shake my head. He seems to understand and just hugs me again. I take a deep breath and smile. He still smells like my Jacob. He still is my Jacob. For the first time in a long time I feel somewhat complete, whole. It was at that second that I knew. I knew that I could heal. That I could feel like me again. That this pain didn't last forever. Me and Jake stand like that for a long time. We eventually walked over to the garage and I saw the car he's working on, a rusty red Rabbit. We talk as he works. I learn so much. I realize how much has happened since I checked out, since that night.
I learn that the man who found me was Sam. The same Sam that has been converting the young men of the Quileute tribe to join the "cult" that he has going. The same Sam that caused Jake to lose one of his best friends. While that disgustd me, Jacob seems to be fine with it. We talked for hours, just catching up on these lost months. He made me want to talk. He made me want to smile, really smile. And most of all, he helped me forget.
That day was the first time I truly smiled since he left. The first time that I had a full blown conversation. The first time I had laughed. The first time I had joked. We talked and talked for hours. He knew exactly what to say. We hugged for several minutes when I had to leave.
"You better promise me that you'll come back," he warned me. "I swear," I genuinely answer. He pulls away to look me in the eyes. I'm shocked by the tears in his eyes. "I'm serious, Bella. I just got you back." The look on his face makes me want to melt a little. "Scout's honor," I joke, and hold my hand in the air like I'm pledging or something. He laughs and rolls his eyes. "I'm glad to have you back," he says softly. "It's good to be back."
I drive home smiling and singing along with the radio that Charlie had to replace after I destroyed the one that his family had gotten me. When I pull up to my house. I literally skip to the door. When I walk in, I'm smiling and I go hug Charlie, who actually looks a little terrified at my new behaviour.
"Are you okay?" I almost laugh out loud at his concern. "Never better, Dad. Never better." I head upstairs and to my bedroom. I slowly come down from my Jake-induced high and the old me makes a small comeback, but it's not nearly as bad. The hole is still there, but its smaller. I still wake up in the night, but instead of a blood-curdling scream, it's a cold sweat. And that's how I knew.
I wasn't broken. I was just bent. And I was starting to heal.
Thank y'all for taking the time to read this! I would love to know you're opinion on if I should continue this story or not. Love y'all.
Hasta luego,
fangirl0647 ;)