I had never been so furious in my life before that moment, as I pulled the picture of her and Lucas from my bag.

"Fine! Wanna see something' else? Here's a picture of you and Lucas on my birthday!" I looked her briefly in the eyes, knowing she would see the anger in them. "So who's the whore now?!" I hurled the thing at the ground, half hoping it would bounce and hit Peyton right in the temple and knock her out. But it didn't, even though she flinched, so cowardly as always. I turned away then, still blowing smoke out of my nose but done ranting, and waited to hear her pathetic sniffling comment or plea or apology. But I heard a pause, and then steps on her porch, and they were not the steps in the slow gate of a retreat. No. Instead the blonde was charging me, and I turned around just in time to take the brunt of the assault. I was in the air, her arms hooked around my legs, my head far above hers. Before I could think, the wind knocked out of me already, I was on my back, fighting her immediately. It was then that I was reminded of how strong her boney ass actually was, her straddle pinning me to the ground. "Stop!" I yelled at her, like I actually thought she would. And then she commanded me to

"Quit it!" It was almost funny, now that I look back on it. But I was so determined to beat her, and I wrestled her back and forth until I finally ruined her balance, slamming her back into her own lawn. I went for her precious curls. "Oww! Brooke!" she cried, and I smiled for the second I had before she knocked me half off of her. I returned my attention quickly to regaining domination.

"What the hell, Peyton???" I screamed, holding her down. "How the fuck could you do something like that? Behind my back-" She flipped me, so well timed as she always was. My P. Sawyer was playing rough now.

"It wasn't behind your back-"

"Really? Then explain to me," I continued to fight her, trying to get right side up again. I really didn't like being underneath her. "explain to me why you never told me about it! Explain to me, why I had to find out through a picture you stupid whore-" I stopped cold, the right side of my face flat against the grass. She had slapped me, and it stung like hell. Never in all my time of knowing her had Peyton hit me before, and it took me a while to overcome the whole prospect. I stopped fighting her, her hands strong on my wrists, restraining me. I panted, feeling the ferocity of her weight on top of me with each exhale. I knew if I tried to fight her off me now she'd only tighten her grip and I'd never get up… She had me. But I was just so pissed off.

I finally turned my head back up to look her in the face. Peyton's eyes bore into mine, angry and passionate, full of drive. Testing the waters, I tried to force my weight up off of the ground, and just like I had thought, she pushed me harder into the grass.

"Peyton, stop… Just, let go!" I struggled against her. "C'mon let go! I'm the one with no boyfriend, no prom dress and a black eye!" She fought with me, not letting my words distract her. It was then that I felt tears press to the backs of my eyes. "… Look, I don't care that you were with Lucas on my birthday, okay? You win that one, alright?" I was still breathing hard, but she was breathing harder. I took a little pride in that. But she eyed me as I spoke. "I care that you weren't with me. I care that you were never with me… I fucking hate you for it, Peyton." I really was in no position to talk to her like this, I knew. She could have knocked me out at that point. But my blood was boiling and I was about to cry and I had to release the emotion somehow. "It was never about Lucas. Never. But you? Always." I tried a fast one and she faltered, catching herself just before smashing into me. But she recovered before I could flip her.

"Brooke-"

"No, shut up," I snapped. "How could you not get it?" My fight was returning. I wriggled under her, spring-loading my weight. "It was always about you, Peyton. You!" Her nails dug into my skin.

"Are you seriously blaming me for this?" The fight for dominance began again, and it was a while before either of us could speak. Her face was so Peyton. It was so hurt and predictable.

"I… I am!" I said. "Because you've always been too absorbed in Lucas or Nathan or Jake to see anything else!"

"Brooke, what the hell are you talking about?" She was trying to hold me still, but my body was just not having it. It was like I didn't have any control over my limbs anymore.

"You and me, Peyton! I've been trying for years to tell you, but I've been scared…. I love you. You were supposed to be with me. It was supposed to be us forever! But I had to let it go because of you! I had to let it go because of Nathan. Because of Jake. Because of… Lucas. So you win, Peyton, alright? You. Fucking. Win." She got off of me slowly, and I helped push her off. If I noticed nothing else, I saw her eyes, big and classic as they watched me in confusion. She wiped the hair that was stuck to her damp forehead out of her face, her lips never closing as she took in all the air she could. I sat up, trying to regain some dignity.

"Why didn't you say something-"

"Why do you even care, anyway?!" I yelled, my anger returning. "Prom's practically here and you're going with the boy you love!" She stopped as she got close to her stairs, turning slowly to look at me.

"…Why do I care?" she asked me, breathless. "Brooke, this has been one of the worst years of my life." She looked away from me, either gathering her thoughts or too disgusted to even see me. "And maybe it would have been nice to know how my best friend feels about me so I didn't have to fake my way through things on top of all the other shit I've been through! It is so hard to put on a smile for someone you love and kiss someone you don't. And it's even harder when the person you love cuts you out of their life because you were honest with them… Even when they weren't."

"Peyton-"

"So why do I care? Because I do, Brooke. And I wish that I would have known that you did too before now. Because now, our friendship has gone to shit!" I was standing then, suddenly closer to her. I still kept my distance.

"Peyton, please-"

"No. Don't do it, Brooke." she said. She was forbidding me to come closer to her. I tested the waters for the second time with her that day, taking one step closer to her. She only closed her eyes then, years streaming out of them, and shook her head quickly. "You hurt me, you know. You hurt me more than anyone has ever, ever hurt me." She paused, her head facing the ground, her eyes still closed and letting tears fall under her lashes. "But not anymore because you and me, we're done." She was looking at me then, and I had gotten closer than I had been before she had looked down. And the look in her eyes said it all.

"No, don't-"

"Forget it," she said, starting to walk away. "Go home." I watched her climb the few stairs to get to her door, every inch of my body itching to do something. So I went after her, my vision slightly blurred with tears, and caught her before she got inside.

"Peyton…" She looked at me over her shoulder, her eyes angry and tired. I read her quickly, a little scan to see how smooth everything would go and before she could say anything, I kissed her. She tensed, wanting to pull away, but she never did. In fact she turned to face me, her hand reaching up to the side of my face to pull me closer.

"I hate you," she murmured, tears in her voice, and I believed it. And then she bit my lip and I flinched, pulling away. My fingers went to tend to my small wound and I looked up at her, taken back by the expression on her face. There was strong anger there, and a slight determination. A single tear fell down among the drying ones on her face and her expression softened. I stepped closer again, catching the tear half way down her face.

"I'm sorry, Peyton," I said. I tucked hair out of her face and she relaxed more. She looked up at me, not smiling.

"… I know," she said. "I am too." I leaned in again, just enough to ask permission, and she came the rest of the way, kissing me gently without biting this time. But she pulled back after only a moment, no amusement in her face. "Go home, Brooke," she said softly, stepping back. She glanced over my head out to my car, and then back to me, enforcing her light command. I looked down, resisting my tears, and turned away from her, descending the stairs to head for my car.

I didn't hear her close the front door until I gunned the engine, and I tried my best not to hesitate before driving away… I started crying once I got around the corner.