The Temptations

by sequestration13

Ser Cullen has to confront his greatest nemesis. Not Calpernia, Samson, nor Corypheus, and certainly not his Lyrium addiction, but the predations of Evelyn Mariam Rainbow Twilight Sprinkle Sue Trevelyan. A cracky selection of moments during the events of Dragon Age: Inquisition.

1. Chapter 1

The Temptations

Sequestration13

"O Maker, hear my cry:

Guide me through the blackest nights

Steel my heart against the temptations of the wicked

Make me to rest in the warmest places."

- Transfigurations 12

---

Ser Cullen Stanton Rutherford of Honnleath could not believe his eyes. Ellen Trevelyan was back in his office yet again.

Lady Trevelyan sat on his desk, eyes lasciviously fluttering in time to the song of the birds that always seemed to follow her around. Despite her insistence on wearing those horridly dull clothes, Cullen could not stop from producing a wan smile.

"Lady Trevelyan," began the Commander.

"Oh my brave Templar, you help me get through every single day and every night," replied the Inquisitor with heady abandon.

"Of course, Inquisitor." Cullen tried desperately to right the ship. Today was just not a good day, as the lyrium still in his system cried out yet again for replenishment. Desperately trying to conceal the whanging headaches returning with a vengeance, Cullen made his way to the desk.

Evelyn Mariam Twilight Rainbow Sprinkle Sue Trevelyan was all too delighted at this course of action.

Whirling off of the desk with a grace that belied her status as a mage, Cullen soon found himself with the Inquisitor in his arms, fingers straining as she languidly stretched towards the fur collar around his neck. The Commander tried his best to avoid rolling his eyes.

"Inquisitor, I really must attend to my duties," came the curt dismissal.

Evelyn was having none of it. "But my Commander, surely you could use a little bit of a break. All work and no play makes for a dull Cully-wully."

What.

"Cully Wully?"

"Yes, my dearest. Sera insisted that I give you an endearing nickname, just like all of those lovers in Varric's serials," Evelyn replied breathlessly.

Sera. It had to be. "What do you mean 'like in Varric's serials'?"

"Even the dear Seeker reads them. Swords and Shields. We can be like the Knight-Captain and the Champion."

It was just too much for Cullen. The headaches and the realization, that, that "VARRIC SHIPPED ME WITH HAWKE!"

"It wasn't all bad," purred the Inquisitor. "It gave me some of the most interesting ideas," tongue lolling out at the prospect of an evening of adventures.

Maker, thought Cullen. Corypheus couldn't be defeated soon enough.