This is my first Wincest fic so it's not the greatest but I do like it a little bit. It's kind of a tag for 'After School Special' but it takes place during the flashbacks. Hope you like it, if you do let me know and if I should stop trying to write wincest… let me know that to!
They pulled up to the motel room and Sam bolted from the car as soon as it stopped. Dean watched Sam leave the car and did his best to ignore his dad's voice behind him. They both knew Sam hated when they moved around to much, especially when Sam managed to make a friend where ever they were. While they were at Truman Dean himself only saw Sam with one kid, Berry or something but he'd also been in a fight there. Honestly Dean didn't see why Sam was so upset about leaving, he should have been happy! Hell the kid was getting away from getting in trouble!
Shaking his head Dean looked over at his father, of course he was telling Dean that Sam needed a better attitude. "You told me that boy wasn't happy about being there why the hell is he being pissy now!" His father stared at the door where the younger Winchester had just gone into. "I don't have time for this I gotta go, new lead from a Benjamin Crooke."
Quickly Dean exited the impala watching his father drive off. Normally he would have stayed and tried to talk to Sam, which would only result in a screaming match from Sam but at least John tried. However the second he said lead Dean knew that his father was on a mission. Waving to his father he bit his lip and pushed the door open to the room. It was better than most hotels they stayed at, but it was the first one that they came to and their father wanted to get away as soon as he could. Running his hands thought his hair he walked towards the room pulling the room key out of his pocket. Pushing the door open he rolled his eyes looking at Sam who was curled in the middle of the bed with the covers over his head.
Moving onto the bed next to his younger brother he sighed trying to move the covers away from Sam's body. The younger Winchester simply moved away from him and went back to ignoring Dean's existence. It was bad but Dean knew how Sam felt, it annoyed him but he did understand. John was mad but there was nothing Dean could do to stop that, so he was stuck with an angry father and a bratty sulky little brother. Putting his hand on Sam's shoulder again he shook Sam harder only to be ignored again.
Letting out a loud sigh he looked down at Sam's form on the bed. "You gotta stop this Sammy..." Dean bit the inside of his lip, "I mean I had to leave Amanda to, you're not the only one." Now Dean only hoped that Sam hadn't heard about his not so proud last moments at the school.
Pushing the blankets off of his head Sam glared at him as he pushed away from the bed standing up, "You were with other girls at the same time it's different you didn't really care!"
Rolling his eyes Dean clenched his jaw, "Come on Sammy you knew this was going to happen. We weren't going to stay forever." he pleaded reaching out to grab his little brother.
Sam jerked away from him again sitting on the edge of the other bed in the room glaring at him, "No but we stayed long enough for you to hook up with two girls!" he snapped.
Scoffing Dean shook his head, "Sammy, Sammy, Sammy. I hooked up with one. I only kissed the other, kissing is nothing little brother." he said letting a lazy smirk come across his lips. Sometimes Sam was to innocent for his age, it was cute sometimes.
A look flashed across Sam's eyes, it was almost too fast to see but Dean caught it. "No it is something. Amanda really liked you… I heard she cried after she found you." Sam looked down at the floor, "Playing with people's emotions is bad Dean!" he yelled clenching his fists at his sides. "You always do that to people! You make them feel like you like them and let them think that they have a chance then you're sucking face with the next thing you see!"
Dean pulled his eyebrows together, Sam was beyond pissed, why the hell was he so worked up over what he did to Amanda? "What the hell are you talking about?" there was something Sam wasn't telling him. Usually he was great at reading Sam but not now.
Hazel eyes shifted away from his as he pulled his lip into his mouth looking straight at the floor letting out a few shaky breaths. "I heard you… the first night we were there. You thought I was asleep… but I wasn't."
Shaking his head Dean shot off the bed and bolted away from Sam. He didn't need to hear anymore to know what Sam was talking about. Running his hand through his hair he looked at the wall. He'd thought about Sam while he jacked off… he'd even said Sam's name. "Sammy I…" he stopped, would sorry really make up for this? He was sick and Sam knew. Sam was only 14, a baby by all means. Not to mention his fucking brother. He'd never meant for Sam to hear that… to know how messed up Dean was.
His whole life he'd been told to protect Sam, and when the time came to protect Sam from himself then he did. But he knew now. Sam knew that Dean was a freak he knew that his big brother was utterly disgusting. Running his hands through his hair he closed his eyes, this couldn't be actually happening. He was always so cautious about it, he should have known Sam wasn't asleep, it was his job to take care of Sam. But that night his brain wasn't on taking care of Sam it was about what Dean wanted. Selfishness was the only word he could think of to describe it, he was selfish, instead of thinking of his brother, in normal ways, he was to worried about his own dick.
Before he realized it Sam was next to him, the younger Winchester raised his hand slowly put his hand on Dean's shoulder. "De…"
Jerking back he looked at Sam for the first time since he stood up. "I'm… I'm sick… you don't…" he should leave, leave Sam with John, but he couldn't do that to either of them. His dad needed him and leaving Sam with their father would be horrible for him, he would just have to make Sam understand that he was sorry, that he would never do anything to him.
Sam stared back at Dean, his eyes didn't show any signs of disgust, of course Sam would still trust his brother. "You're not Dean… I promise."
Letting a hard laugh escape he looked at the shorter teen before him, "Do you even realize… do you have any idea what I've thought about you? You're my baby brother, it's wrong for me to do that!" He had to tear his eyes away from Sam again. "I'm sick but don't worry… I won't do anything I swear to you Sammy you gotta believe me!"
They both stood in silence for a moment, Dean continued to look anywhere but at Sam, where his brothers eyes were fixated on him. All he could hope was that Sam would trust him, that Sam didn't want him to leave. It would probably kill him if he had to be away from Sammy. "What if I wanted you to…" the voice was so quiet Dean wasn't even sure he heard it. Slowly he turned to face his brother, his eyes were on the floor and he had his lip sucked into his mouth. He could tell his brother was biting down hard on his lip. "I don't think you're sick Dean… if I did I would have told you, I don't know what you think but I know what I think."
Sucking in a breath Dean shook his head quickly, "No you can't. Sammy you don't think that you're 14 you think about chicks Sammy!" he snapped looking at his little brother. His brother heard him, and that filled Sam's head with ideas and now he was thinking the same thoughts he was. "I made you think this way!"
"No you didn't!" he could hear the panic in Sam's voice as he spoke putting his hand on Dean's back as he had it turned into him. "I felt it before that Dean I promise! I didn't know you did... I promise Dean you have to believe me." Dean spun around and looked at Sam shaking his head. "You didn't do anything to me." Sam's voice was quiet now.
Letting out a slow breath Dean bit the inside of his lip, "How long then... if it wasn't me then when?" He could see Sam flinch back, he didn't blame him, he'd never used this voice with his younger brother.
Sam opened his mouth but quickly closed it. It was like he was actually watching Sam think, "As long as I can remember. I tried everything I could think of to like somebody else but I don't." His voice was shaking as he spoke and it was ripping Dean's heart in half. "I never thought you'd feel the same to I hid it but that night… I knew you did so I don't know I thought maybe you'd tell me and let me know so I could tell you how I felt."
Dean didn't resist the urge to scoff, "Yeah and we'd live an incestuous life forever?" he raised an eyebrow at his little brother who quickly looked at his feet. "What the hell Sam everyone knows you're my brother we can't do this it doesn't matter about how anyone feels."
"Dad will be back soon and we'll move again and we don't have to be brothers there! We both know dad won't stick around to tell anyone anything so I don't see why not." Sam wasn't giving up on this and the more he talked about it the more since it made to Dean. "We spend our lives moving from town to town and never being able to make friends or anything like that… all I have is you Dean. I don't need any one else but you. Our lives are already messed up Dean…"
"This will just make it worse!" Dean snapped looking down at his brother.
Sam shook his head and gave Dean a small smile, "No it won't. It will be something we have control over, something that would make us… or at least me happy. I have nothing in my life that's mine Dean, but we could have it."
Closing his eyes tightly he walked over to the bed closest to the door and put his head in his hands. Was he actually considering this? Sam was his baby brother, the person he watched over, took care of, raised… and the only one who ever made him as happy as he was. He felt Sam standing in front of him and opened his eyes slowly setting his mouth in a hard line. Sam was standing in front of him, hand balled up by his side, bottom lip pulled into his mouth and his hair covering his eyes wanting to be near Dean but not have to look at him.
Cursing himself he reached out grabbing Sam's hands waiting until the younger Winchester raised his head to look at him. "There are rules." He started as Sam's eyes grew wide. "I love you Sammy but your just a kid so nothing even remotely close to sex at all until I decide you're old enough, if I do something you don't like you tell me, and if you do something and I push you away you can't get all bitchy at me. Most importantly it's just between us, no one else so when dad's around don't even look at me in any funny kind of way got it, no one can know!"
Sam gave him a look but stopped when Dean raised an eyebrow daring him to argue. Slowly Sam moved his hands to where he was holding onto Dean's fingers, "Can we kiss…" he asked quietly flashing his eyes to Dean momentarily.
Smiling softly Dean nodded swallowing hard, this would be the moment where he decided if he could really do this. Leaning up he lightly pressed his lips to Sam's earning a hum of approval as his lips softly touched his little brothers. Sam tightened his grip on Dean's hands before moving his hands to Dean's shoulders. Yeah, he could do this, no matter how bad it was to other people he could do this and he knew he could when he moved his hand to the back of Sam's head cupping his neck letting their lips move together.
The kiss was innocent, it was really just Sam testing the waters and getting the feel of someone else kissing him. He knew for a fact this was only his second or third kiss so he wasn't going to push it. Dean was going to let Sam set the pace unless he tried to jump into something then he would stop it. Slowly Sam pulled away the stupid smile he always got when he really liked something was on his face causing a small smile to come to Dean's lips as well.
"Can we lay down for a little bit… together I mean?" Sam was nervous again as he spoke, obviously afraid Dean was going to say no.
Dean nodded letting go of Sam before moving up on the bed laying back, "Sure Sammy." He watched Sam crawl onto the bed next to him shifting close to his side as he did. Relaxing a little Dean smiled at the ceiling; this was nice, and almost normal, with the exception of his hand reaching out grabbing his little brothers.
After a few moments of comfortable silence he felt Sam shift next to him, "Hey Dean." Dean raised an eyebrow in his brothers general direction letting him know he was listening. "Uh can… can it just be me… I don't want to…"
He could hear the panic in Sam's voice as he sat up in bed. Reaching an arm out Dean wrapped his arm around Sam's chest pulling him back leaving his brothers head to rest on his chest as he pressed a kiss to the top of his head. "Yeah Sammy only you, I promise." Sam was still tense for a few moments before he relaxed into Dean nodding slowly.