Note: Sorry if any of this feels strange or disjointed, it's my first fanfic, and I am super rusty as far as any creative writing is concerned. If you like it, feel free to drop a review. Also, the title of this fic is from an Andrew Bird song in case that interests you.
Disclaimer, I don't own any of this. Just my trusty Macbook.
Korra had a bitter sense of irony. Irony. Yes, that's how she would put it. She was a bending prodigy. An Avatar that mastered three of the four elements without any difficulty as soon as she could walk, Korra was told that she was destined for greatness. It was the kind of things that made her become so cocksure despite her shortcomings. She failed though. There was no other way of putting it. Maybe it was the pressure from everyone, but Korra saw it no other way. She failed at being an Avatar, and now she was stripped of everything she knew. Her bending was taken from her in some cruel joke by an anti-bending waterbender. He would have taken Mako's bending too if it weren't for some act of the Spirits blessing her with airbending after spending so much of her life being blocked from airbending. To make matters worse, after this incident, she connected with her spiritual self and with her predecessor for the first time, and she was told that he could not help her state. Funny, she thought. Her predecessor Aang possessed the power to restore, but he could not restore the rest of her bending- to make her whole again.
Mako tried to lift Korra's spirits. He declared his love for her, and she felt like something was being given back to her. However, none of the emptiness she felt subsided. She couldn't feel anything- just fear, pain, and anxiety. She seized up when anyone mentioned Amon, or she felt panicked if she heard whispers of her name. She tried anything to keep her mind of things. She continued to train under Tenzin to hone her skills as an air bender, but every success made her think of the absence of her other powers. She continued her relationship with Mako despite the kind of hollowness she felt whenever he kissed her. Korra cried silently after each time Mako made love to her as if she knew that he did this to keep appearances. Somehow, it became predictable that Mako would eventually cheat on her with Asami, and when she finally caught him, it just cemented everything that Korra knew about herself. She was nothing without her bending, and she could no longer call herself an Avatar. No one wanted to be associated with a girl who failed at her only destiny. In her words, she became a killjoy. Not even Bolin wanted to hang out with Korra. It was as if her depression was some contagious disease to people.
Korra decided to quarantine herself from the rest of the world. Korra returned back to the compound. Her homeland. She and Naga would go off weeks by themselves hunting and return to make her presence known. Sometimes the village arranged for search parties to find her because her parents feared for the worst. It became frequent enough that the village decided to stop. There was no use in swaying someone who dreamed of death more than life. People visited her from time to time, and it just made her anxious to have the responsibility of being a hostess. Katara visited her the most. Katara never did much when she visited. She never talked to Katara when she came over. All she did was clean around and make Katara eat. This was the only kind of relationship Korra could even keep. A one-sided relationship that did not require Korra to do anything because doing anything could mean that she could fail.
The evening sun started to blaze down. Korra looked at the sun setting as she sat on a cliff. It was the very cliff she had spiritually awakened at over a year ago. She was not able to connect again since that time. She came here often though- not out of some sort of hope that Aang would come back and tell her that he could restore her bending, but because it became a place she could come to just cry. Korra cried more than she ever had in her life these days. She didn't always cry because she was sad or frustrated. She cried because there was seemingly nothing else that could be done. She often watched her tears skip into the breeze. Sometimes she would airbend them away from her face, and sometimes this looked as if she could waterbend again. She liked the little wisps of air that flew from her fingertips as she did this. She liked this little lie to herself. This evening as she cried, she heard someone sit beside her. He sat in regal burgundy robes trimmed with gold and had a distinct scar over his left eye that she remembered well. It was Iroh's grandfather Zuko, a man she knew since she was a child. He had been gone for some time as an ambassador of peace. She supposed that he was in the area just trying his hardest to cheer her up like everyone else failed at.
"You know, I always thought my destiny was to bring back my honor by killing the Avatar. It wasn't until I learned who I was that I realized what my destiny truly was, but when I look back at it, I still don't know what my destiny exactly is," Zuko said.
"I don't think anyone can change this destiny I have," Korra said.
"No one should, but it doesn't mean you should accept it. Besides, failing is inevitable. It's a part of life," Zuko said.
"But no one is telling you that your failure has ruined people's lives. That people were depending on you and you ruined it."
"You never met my father. Haha… Well, it doesn't matter Korra. I didn't come to talk to you about honor or destiny or anything like that. I didn't come to cheer you up. What I came for is to give you this."
Zuko reached in his robes and took an old wooden mask. The old wooden mask was an old Earth Kingdom relic from an old opera that Zuko loved. It was the face of the Blue Spirit- the face of many tales told now to children. Korra heard these stories from Katara when she was young. Romantic tales of a young Fire Nation male who traveled through the Earth Kingdom in search of his destiny and honor. He stole the rich and corrupt, defended the helpless, and saved a nation or two. Rumors were that not only was the Blue Spirit real, but that his true identity was that of the Fire Nation prince. A banished prince searching for justice beneath a mask- truly a fairy tale.
"Sometimes it's nice to have a different face," Zuko said.
Korra fingered the ribbons and then placed the mask onto her face. Normally, she would shun the mask because masks had become some sort of trigger for panic attacks for her, but she felt comfortable in this mask.
"What does an old opera mask have to do with that?" Korra asked.
"Well maybe a new face could help. You can just be whomever you want with the mask. Maybe a crime-fighting vigilante?" Zuko said.
Korra laughed. She heard rumors that Zuko himself was the man behind the Blue Spirit stories. Iroh laughed at that whenever someone mentioned it. Iroh said that his grandfather was just some tea-loving, pai sho playing man that appreciated opera- definitely not a crime-fighting vigilante type even with all of that back-story.
"Probably not. No crime here in Southern Water Tribe lands with the exception of accidental theft of an otter-penguin," Korra said.
"Maybe Republic City could use someone like that? Always lots of crime to be dealt with," Zuko said.
"I'd rather not. Not with everyone there…" Korra said.
"I bet Ba Sing Se would be a good place to try that out. I'm not speaking out of experience though," Zuko said.
Korra laughed again. What was with it tonight with old man Zuko, Korra thought? It was good to be with someone not forcing her to feel better in the usual way but with a way that truly spoke with her. Zuko knew the right things to say even though Korra sometimes didn't understand what he was talking about. Iroh said it was a family thing.
"Katara says I should visit my uncle and his family in the north," Korra said.
"She usually has good ideas," Zuko said.
"Usually?"
"Well everyone's entitled to a terrible one now and again."
"Do you think I should go?"
"Go or don't go. Crime fighting or no crime fighting. It's all up to you. Don't listen to anyone but yourself. Sometimes when you lose yourself, you find yourself in order to find your true self. I think that's how that saying goes."
"I guess I don't have anything to lose then. It's not like things are going to change here. Thank you very much Fire Lord Zuko for your advice."
"I really only came here to give you that mask Korra! And don't call me Fire Lord! Just Zuko is fine!"
Korra took off the mask and hugged Zuko. She wore a smile on her face. She couldn't tell if she was happy or if she wanted to wear a smile because it had been too long. She tied the mask to her pelt knowing that she would get some use out of it,
"So Zuko, can I get a lift?" Korra asked.
"If you don't mind old bushel britches Iroh, then the pleasure would be mine," Zuko said.
