The Doctor leaned, hunched over the balcony, his head in his hands.
Memories replayed over and over in his head, like a broken video tape.
His argument with Adric – one of many.
Making up with him – acknowledging Adric's brilliance, and the accuracy of his sums.
Those last moments when the Doctor had rushed to safety with Tegan…leaving Adric behind.
How could he ever forgive himself?
Could he go back in time, and prevent Adric from dying?
No. As easy as it sounded, it went against his very moral code…for such an action could have unforeseeable consequences. No.
He would have to face up to his grief…force himself to accept that Adric's death was not his own fault…quell his dark hatred of the Cybermen.
As he gazed into the infinite depths of his TARDIS, he felt a cool hand on his shoulder.
He did not have to look up to know that it was Tegan.
Only she knew the true depths of his anguish…Nyssa might guess at it…but he had bared his soul to Tegan.
And she was fighting her own guilt, as well as fighting herself – trying not to blame the Doctor for what had happened. And, curse it, he couldn't help but agree with her.
Silent sobs racked his body.
Such a young, young life snuffed out – by those who had no such thing.
He turned into Tegan's comforting arms, and felt her wet cheeks upon his.
They hugged tight.
In that one moment, nothing seemed to matter.
The Doctor wished that this hug could squeeze out every ounce of remorse and guilt.
He stroked Tegan's hair, and together they turned, and gazed into the endless heart of the TARDIS.
fin