Nos Volentes Ductus Ignarum Facitis Ingratum Esse

by Consulting Criminal InTraining

When Moriarty takes something you love twists it turns and corrupts it and uses it against you. How do you respond?

1. Chapter 1

The desert sun was just rising. John Watson leaned back in his Adirondack chair and sipped on his beer. It was a long night in the Operating Theatre. A bunch of kids from a local school set up by the American Military and Missionaries had come under attack. No one was saying who was responsible but it had been bad. Several guards and quite a few kids had been injured. Six kids had died; there was nothing the doctors could do when they arrived at the base hospital.

John shut his eyes and tried to force the images out of his mind. A shadow moved across him and he opened his eyes to see a tall brunette standing over him. He had seen her in the hospital she was with MI-6 they had been running a job nearby when the attack happened, and had jumped into service to aid the doctors.

W. H. her vest said the other MI-6 agents just called her Ma'am, when they had reached the base she was in one of the ambulances sleeves rolled up and pinching off a severed femoral artery. She rode on the gurney into the theatre grabbing a clamp from a nurse as she went by.

She had stayed in the operating theatre the entire time taking patient after patient. Her style was crude by effective, what someone might call meatball surgery, but she was a welcomed pair of hands and from his walk through the recovery area John could tell all her patients were doing well.

"Captain Watson?" She asked.

"Ah yes" John said standing leaving his beer by the chair and saluting

"You don't have to salute me" She smiled

"Sorry Agent…." John asked trailing for a name

"Willa and well not really an agent per say" She smiled "You did good work in there, you're fast and efficient."

"Thank you, you were pretty good in there yourself." John smiled

"Thanks. There's some incidents heating up on between here at Camp Bastion and Uzbekistan and we're going to set up base here for a bit." Willa said looking down at his tiny can of allowed beer. British Army bases were allowed some alcohol on base but at a regulation of the superiors "I see you're off shift. If you'd like to come back to my barracks I can get you something better then ration quality beer" she smiled. "As a reward for the wonderful work you did with those children."

John smiled and followed the government agent.

Three hours, a bottle of top shelf scotch and a round of sex later John was curled up next to Willa on the rather large bed for a temporary tent bunk. Another perk of being MI-6 she had smiled.

"Now John" She said kissing his neck "I hope this doesn't change our working relationship"

"I wasn't aware we were to have one?" John smiled

"Well see after the operating theatre and before I found you at your barracks I did a little reading. You're quite the shot for an army doctor, most just squeak past the test so they can carry and work at a FOB, you, you have the makings of a sniper, but I think first you have to start off as a spotter"

"Excuse me?" John said sitting.

"I need a new spotter, you see my old spotter, he sort of snapped and went rouge, he was the one who opened fire on the school." Willa said sitting up and running a hand over John's chest.

"So this is your recruitment premises, sleep with me then offer me a job" John said looking around for his pants and trousers.

"No I was just going to give you a drink then recruit you, your conversation, adorable smile and those magical eyes of yours I can never tell if they're blue, green, or brown, it's all the way the light hits them" Willa smiled kissing him again "I just lost myself, all my training down the drain. You looked across the table at me telling me that story of you on leave in Hong Kong and I knew I needed to have you in every possible way." She smiled.

John looked down for a moment and then smiled

"This isn't some MI-6 trick is it?" He asked

"I should be appalled at you asking but alas I know why you ask. No it's not a trick. You will join myself, Flagg, Lynch and Smith and our team as we track Sebastian Moran, my former spotter, professional partner and nothing more. Had to break off my relationship when I entered the field work, Office and field operatives are not really allowed to have relationships with each other." Willa smiled "There was a guy, but he's married, only reason his wife was ok with him being around was that my partner at the time was a woman"

"A woman so you are" John started

"Bisexual yes just like you" She smiled, "I can just tell" she smiled answering the how did you know look he gave her.

"So are you in?" Willa smiled

"I'd have to ask my commander." John started.

"Of course, and he would be asked to please release you into my command."

"You command" John said raising an eyebrow "Are their not rules about commanding officers sleeping with subordinates"

"Well, I could just loose that page of the handbook" Willa said guiding him back down onto the bed and kissing his chest. "And technically you're on loan the rules don't count."

"Well then, I guess I'm on loan to MI-6" John smiled as he grabbed Willa's waist and flung her onto the bed and climbed on top of her.

She smiled bigger she loved the aggressiveness.

Later that night John sat around the table of the very well catered meal. Willa and Major James Sholto John's CO were at the head of the table having a lively discussion about some helicopter mission near Kabul. By the end of the meal John was officially placed on loan to the MI-6 and all his stuff was moved into Willa's barracks.

Within a day they got word of Moran's movements and they were on the move. John just marveled at how they just left with their gear and another team came in later to pack up their stuff and move their base for them.

He rather liked working with Willa, when in the field she was so focused, and when they were in position on a mission, she was so still and calm, John one time almost had to check for a pulse as it seemed like she was barely breathing. Sniper training John knew, complete calming of the body. To see it in person was amazing.

He took to the job of spotter well. Willa said she'd have to get him to start training as a sniper and then she could focus on commanding.

His training was short lived. Five months into their mission He and Willa were tangled up together in her hotel room in Balkh when the message came. Moran was in Mazar-i-Sharif and was planning another hit, this one on a women's clinic.

John and Willa quickly dressed and headed to their cars. The drive into Mazar-i-Sharif was quick no need to worry about speed limits, and they knew the roads were IED clear as they had people watching them.

They reached the building their scouts had deemed to be Moran's hideout.

The thing about using locals as scouts was that they were not always loyal. Their scout was right they had the proper building, but a greater payment from Moran and the scout neglected to tell them the actual number of men Moran had and has forgot to tell them the building was wired.

Six men lost their lives in the initial blast, mostly from the local military that they had recruited. Lynch went down in the second smaller explosion. They were able to push into the main area of the building and that's when the firefight started.

Bullets were flying everywhere, John pushed Willa down into cover behind a jeep before taking cover Himself behind a few crates marked ammo and arms. He smiled and cracked it open, pulled out two of the assault rifles, loaded them and slid one to Willa as she took out her satellite phone and called in back up. When she hung up John gabbed some extra ammo belts and pointed to where Moran was held up in a warehouse office.

They took turns covering each other as they advanced on Moran.

Willa and John turned as they heard a cry from Smith; he was on the floor the lower part of his leg blown off by a barrage of amour piercing rounds. Willa reloaded and started firing at the office.

She only stopped when she heard a scream from John. She turned to see him sink to his knees, blood seeped across the shoulder of his uniform, and Moran took advantage of Willa's distraction and took aim. Flagg barely shoved her out of the way. The armor piercing round tore through her hip shattering the bones before embedding itself in the wall behind.

John struggled to stay on his knees raising his gun, he was hit in his left shoulder so his dominant right arm was uninjured, but the pain that was radiating though his arm was enough to throw him off kilter. He raised his gun haphazardly aimed at Moran and fired. The man fell to the ground clutching his stomach as back up burst in.

John found himself falling backwards in almost a slow motion. His head came to rest on the ground almost softly. He stared up at the ceiling listening to the voices around him they seemed so far away. He turned his head to where he's last seen Willa. She was on the ground Flagg and another were working on her hip. Someone was over him he heard his name but when he tried to answer he found no words come out of his mouth.

The person over him assured him that he was going to be alright and that they were taking him to a hospital.

John passed out shortly after that. He woke up four days later in a private hospital in what he believed was England, out the windows looked like England. Willa was in a bed across from him, Smith was in one next to him and Flagg… when was Flagg hurt, was across from Smith by Willa.

Willa had some sort of external frame over her pelvis; John guessed that it was for an internal traction and stabilization for her injuries, it meant her pelvis sustained severe damage. He looked over at his own shoulder that was held in place tightly with all the bandages. He started running though all his knowledge trying to figure out what they might have done for a repair job. Lots of hardware he surmised, few pins, plates and screws.

He watched as an older man entered the room and went right to Willa, he sort of looked like her, father? No not old enough, brother perhaps. He leaned down and kissed her forehead. He was talking to a nurse that had entered, something about moving Willa to some estate where she would be under the care of a private doctor.

John tried to hear more but he fell asleep again.

The next time he woke he was in a new room, a private room, and the same man who came to see Willa in the other room was there.

"Hello Captain Watson, as you may see you have been moved to a new facility you are at the Queen Elizabeth Hospital in Birmingham as per normal Army protocol" He said "I would like to thank you for the services you rendered for my sister's team. You service and your sacrifice of your own bodily health is appreciated. Moran has been arrested tried and in a prison hospital. You have been medically discharged; when you are able to be released from here you will be sent to a rehabilitation facility in London. You have already been assigned a Recovery Officer she will visit you tomorrow and will be your liaison for the duration of your recovery and will ease you back into civilian life. We got to you early and your shoulder has very minor nerve damage that can be repaired with therapy so you will be able to return to being a doctor if you so choose."

"Where's Willa?" John asked

"She has been moved to my country home and is being attended to by some of England's best doctors" The man said standing

"How is she?" John asked

"She will recover, though I doubt I will send her back on middle or Far East missions. She has a very long road to recovery ahead of her." He said heading to the door.

"When can I see her?" John asked

"Oh you won't be seeing her again. It's not proper for her have relations with a solider that was under her command. She's lucky I kept all that out of my report. I know she was quite hurt by having to leave her lover behind, then having Sebastian turn on her. He was a close friend, not a lover but close enough for the emotional hit she took would have driven her into anyone's bed, and she lucked out with you. However if it was love which I believe it may be, no my sister will not be having any contact. No offense doctor but she may have feelings for you but as far as she will know you are dead. She's one of my best operatives but she lets her feelings get in the way, it distracts her. Flagg told me that if she hadn't stopped to check on you, Moran would have been taken down sooner, and she wouldn't have been injured, but her emotions got the better of her."

"You can't just go around telling her I'm dead what if I run into her on the street in London" John asked as he tried to sit up.

"Oh once she's healed I doubt she will wind up in London. I'll be sending her to our house in France. She likes France, it calms her." The man said from the door way. "Evening Doctor and as I said your Recovery Officer will be here in the morning."

With that the man left and John just laid back and stared at the ceiling. He tried to sleep but his arm hurt his leg hurt too, stiff and sore. Even when he moved back to London in the flat supplied by the veterans services and started his physio he could hardly walk on it, and required a cane, he also had a tremor in his left hand.

At the strong suggestion of the veteran's services he started seeing a therapist. Her name was Ella, it was the normal routine, PTSD, Tremor caused by fear of danger; he was damaged by war haunted by it, psychosomatic limp because his brains were all mottled from what he had seen over in Afghanistan. John didn't argue…much, but he just had a gut feeling that she was wrong. She then suggested blogging, John just laughed, what could he blog about, his life was nothing.

December 14th 2009 he made his first entry, simply titled Nothing, it consisted of a single word in the body of the blog, and that word was Nothing.

The next day it was a similar drab entry about how nothing ever happened to him. It got a comment, just a friend looking to meet up. So the whole thing was exactly what his title was Pointless.

The rest of the month and into January stayed the same. Ella would ask how it was going and he would say fine. In reality he felt as if he was just existing, not living but just rather taking up space.

He stopped blogging, and Ella pushed it. He would read her notes as he talked and just scoff.

Only thing interesting to him was the serial suicides that seemed to be happening, but he kept reading about them. Even wrote in his blog about them. Why not like anyone really cared. Suicides often went unnoticed and unreported.

The next morning John found his service revolver, he didn't know what he was thinking, what he was going to do with it he sat in his chair and stared at the revolver in his hand. He wasn't even supposed to have it. But he would never say where he had got it. . He put it away and went for a walk. He picked up the mornings paper and was going to sit in the park and read it. It's when he ran into an old friend Mike Stamford.

How that chance meeting would change his life John would have never believed it if you had told him beforehand.

It was through Mike that John found himself in a flat in 221B Baker Street with a man who called himself, Sherlock Holmes. Sherlock was a consulting detective and right off the bat John found himself immersed in the world of this fascinating man.

Their first night in the flat, Sherlock was in his chair, John was sitting across from him. Sherlock's eyes were closed his fingers tented under his chin

"Mrs. Hudson thinks we are a couple" Sherlock said breaking the silence, but not moving his hand or opening his eyes

"Well, Um" John didn't know how to respond

"Have you ever been with a man?" Sherlock asked

"I, I don't think that's a question for a first night in a flat share" John said but not bothering to move from the chair.

"Just curious as to who I will be sharing a flat with. You've been with women, have you been with a man?" Sherlock asked again

"Not that it should matter in a flat share but yes. I was with men before, and I have been with women" John replied, he was confused why was he not getting up and leaving, packing it in and moving out.

"I find those who are bisexual most curious" Sherlock replied still without opening his eyes. "To not only be attracted to men or women but men and women. Even attraction is odd. What makes one attracted to some but not to others? Take you for example. I find you aesthetically pleasing, your features are pleasant and your personality and demeanor are as well"

John really didn't know how to respond. Sherlock opened his eyes and put his hands on his knees and leaned forward.

"If I was to kiss you now, you know purely for research and curiosity purposes what would you do?" Sherlock asked.

"I, I um" John cleared his throat "I will return the kiss with pleasure"

"So you do find me attractive" Sherlock said leaning back. "I studied the way you looked at me when you first saw me, much like I looked over you. Of course my primary reason was to deduce what I could from you to see if you would be a suitable flat mate. Noticing your pleasing qualities was a byproduct. You however gave me more than a cursory glance. And when I turned around I saw you in the reflection looking at my backside"

"Well it is rather nice" John said without thinking.

Sherlock raised an eyebrow.

"I propose that we head to my bedroom. We engage in sexual intercourse, if it is not pleasant though I suspect it will be then I will help you find a suitable living space for the same cost as your share here"

"Deal" John said standing.

He really didn't know what was happening, sure he had made many irrational moves and had many one night stands both men and women in university and in the army, but Sherlock seemed different, the way he acted at St. Bart's when they first met and the way he acted around Mrs. Hudson. It was different as if it was a show.

John may not have the observational skills of Sherlock but he knew someone who had been hurt in a relationship before and Sherlock was one.

Sherlock made his way down the hall and John followed. Nothing ever happened to John. Nothing until that night really. It was as pleasurable as Sherlock had suspected, and in the morning there were no odd feelings between the two.

In fact they were having quite the pleasant conversation in their chairs when the Detective Inspector had arrived. Mrs. Hudson had let him up. Sherlock seemed to know the man well enough.

There was another suicide that fit the serials that had been going on, only difference was this one left a note.

Sherlock headed out to follow the DI. Mr. Hudson fluttered around the kitchen, for offering to make tea and bring food she did seem to not want to be treated like a housekeeper despite acting like one.

Sherlock returned and stood before John

"You're a doctor"

"Army doctor"

"Any good"

"Yes"

"Good come with me."

John said nothing but followed.

In the cab on the way to the crime scene he noted how Sherlock came to know so much just by looking. No he said it wasn't looking he said it was observing. Seeing beyond what others merely glance at.

And he did just that at the crime scene. It was fascinating. And the fact that DI Lestrade let him… much as it seemed to the chagrin of the other members of the MET.

Sherlock's demeanor was different again. That side of John saw in St. Bart's was back. The hardness, the closed off person was back.

After the first crime scene John found himself taken in a car to see the same man he met when injured.

"Ah Doctor Watson, you seem to have a knack for finding Holmes siblings. " He said as John entered.

"Pardon?" John asked.

"You've been to the flat have you not seen her pictures on the mantel. Sherlock particularly love the one of them riding the sheep when they were both quite small, and the one of them dressed as Pirates for a party." The man said motioning for John to sit, John remained standing.

"You know, I've got a phone." John said as he looked around to the warehouse he was brought to "I mean, very clever and all that, but er ... you could just phone me. On my phone."

"When one is avoiding the attention of Sherlock Holmes, one learns to be discreet, hence this place." The man said His voice, which has had a pleasant smile in it so far, became a little sterner. "The leg must be hurting you. Sit down."

"I don't wanna sit down." John said he looked the man was studying him

"You don't seem very afraid." The man remarked

"You don't seem very frightening." John replied, the man chuckled

"Ah, yes. The bravery of the soldier. Bravery is by far the kindest word for stupidity, don't you think?" The man said giving John a stern look "What is your connection to Sherlock Holmes?"

"I don't have one. I barely know him. I met him ..." John paused and though wow, it was only yesterday they had moved in together "... yesterday."

"Mmm, and since yesterday you've moved in with him and now you're solving crimes together. Might we expect a happy announcement by the end of the week?" The man gave an eerie smiled

"What's it to you?" John

"I'm just an interested party."

"Interested in Sherlock? Why? I know you are siblings but I'm guessing you're not friends."

"You've met him. How many 'friends' do you imagine he has? No but more so than his brother. I am the closest thing to a friend that Sherlock Holmes is capable of having."

"And what's that?" John asked

"An enemy." The man replied

"An enemy?"

"In his mind, certainly. If you were to ask him, he'd probably say his arch-enemy. He does love to be dramatic." The man said

John looked pointedly around the warehouse

"Well, thank God you're above all that." John said sarcastically.

The man frowned at him. Just then John's phone trilled a text alert. He dug into his jacket pocket, took out the phone and activated it, he looked at the message while ignoring the man in front of him. The message read:

Baker Street.

Come at once

if convenient.

SH

"I hope I'm not distracting you." The man asked

"Not distracting me at all." John said casually

"Do you plan to continue your association with Sherlock Holmes?" the man asked

"I could be wrong ... but I think that's none of your business." John replied

"It could be." The man said ominously

"It really couldn't." John retorted

The man took a notebook from his inside pocket, then opened it

"I'd be happy to pay you a meaningful sum of money on a regular basis to ease your way." He said

He closed the notebook and put it away again

"Why?" John asked

"Because you're not a wealthy man." The man replied

"In exchange for what?" John inquired

"Information. Nothing indiscreet. Nothing you'd feel ... uncomfortable with. Just tell me what he's up to." The man smiled

"Why?"

"I worry about him. Constantly." The man said

"That's nice of you." John said insincerely

"But I would prefer for various reasons that my concern go unmentioned. We have what you might call a ... difficult relationship." The man replied

John's phone sounded another text alert. Again he fished the phone out and looked at the message which read:

If inconvenient,

come anyway.

SH

"No."

"But I haven't mentioned a figure." The man said

"Don't bother." John said putting his phone away

The man laughed briefly

"You're very loyal, very quickly." HE sneered

"No, I'm not. I'm just not interested." John replied

The man looked at him closely for a moment, then took out his notebook and opened it again.

"Trust issues," it says here." He said gesturing to the notebook

John felt a little unnerved.

"What's that?" He asked

"Could it be that you've decided to trust Sherlock Holmes of all people?" The man said looking at his notebook

"Who says I trust him?" John asked

"You slept with him, upon the first night of meeting him you slept with him, and he wanted to sleep with you. I have my ways of knowing without Sherlock knowing. He was your first sexual encounter since my sister. Does that change him now for you, knowing you also slept with his baby sister?" The man smiled

"Are we done?" John asked

The man raised his head and looked into John's eyes.

"You tell me." He smiled

John looked at him for a long moment, then turned his back on him and started to walk away.

"I imagine people have already warned you to stay away from him, but I can see from your left hand that's not going to happen." The man smiled

John stopped dead. His shoulders tensed and dropped and he angrily shook his head a little. Furious he turns back around to face the man.

"My wot?" He asked savagely though gritted teeth

"Show me." The man said calmly nodding towards John's left hand as he spoke, John, not to be intimidated deliberately shifted his feet under him as if digging in. He raised his left hand, bending it at the elbow, and stood still. His message was clear: if the man wanted to look at his hand, he'll have to come to him. Unperturbed by this belligerence, the man strolled forward, hooked the handle of the umbrella over his arm as he reached for John's hand. John instantly pulled his hand back a little.

"Don't." He said tensely

The man lowered his head and raised his eyebrows at John, almost as if saying, 'Did I mention trust issues?!' John very reluctantly lowered his hand, holding it out flat with the palm down. The man took it in both of his own hands and looked at it closely

"Remarkable." The man said

"What is?" John said pulling his hand away

"Most people blunder round this city, and all they see are streets and shops and cars. When you walk with Sherlock Holmes, you see the battlefield." He said turning and walking away a bit He turned towards John again. "You've seen it already, haven't you?"

"What's wrong with my hand?" John asked

"You have an intermittent tremor in your left hand." He said

John nodded his head.

"Your therapist thinks it is post-traumatic stress disorder. She thinks you're haunted by memories of your military service." The man said

John almost flinched as the man accurately fired off the facts at him. His gaze is fixed ahead of him and a muscle in his cheek twitched repeatedly.

"Who the hell are you? How do you know that?" John said angry and distressed

"Fire her. She's got it the wrong way round. You're under stress right now and your hand is perfectly steady." The man said

John's eyes flickered downward before returning to stare ahead of himself, his face set and struggling to hold back his anger.

"You're not haunted by the war, Doctor Watson ... you miss it." He smirked He leaned closer to him. Reluctantly John's eyes rose up to meet his. "Welcome back." The Man whispered

He turned and started to walk away just as John's phone trilled another text alert.

"Time to choose a side, Doctor Watson." The man said walking away and casually twirling his umbrella as he left.

John stood fixed to the spot for a few seconds, then turned and glanced towards the departing man while, behind John, the car door opens and a woman who called herself Anthea.. that Anthea he wondered, got out and walked a few paces towards him, her attention was still riveted to the BlackBerry held in front of her in both hands

John had returned to Baker Street, he was there in time for the drugs bust arranged by Detective Inspector Lestrade to seek out evidence that was being withheld by Sherlock.

Later John shot a man to save Sherlock; he shot a man in the middle of London just to save this man he just met, already slept with and knew he wanted to spend an eternity with. He again got to meet Mycroft as he learned the man was called. He made remarks about Willa and about Sherlock. John and Sherlock headed back to Baker Street.

John asked Sherlock about the young girl in the pictures on the mantel. Sherlock just looked at the floor.

"That is my sister, Willa, she ran away, when she was 16. I knew her briefly again for a while four years ago" Sherlock said "But Mycroft mentioned her, said you knew her."

"In Afghanistan" John replied Sherlock sat in his chair, John sat on the arm of the chair and absentmindedly ran his fingers though Sherlock's hair. Sherlock leaned on him.

"You had a relationship with her didn't you?" Sherlock asked

"I did couple of months while in Afghanistan" John said "She was on the mission where I got shot."

"Is that where she died?" Sherlock asked

"No she was healing just injured her hip." John said as Sherlock leaned on him more.

"Two months before I met you, Mycroft stopped by, said Willa was dead, head shot… Oh…"Sherlock said trailing off

John just pulled him close. Lots of field operatives be they military or government have a hard time adjusting back to civilian life, a headshot was Mycroft's way of telling Sherlock that's their little sister committed suicide.

"Does this affect you and I?" Sherlock asked

"No" John said

Sherlock nodded. They shared a bed that night but just holding each other.

John kept a blog about all the cases he did with Sherlock. It was a mere 3 months later when he found himself strapped into a bomb vest with an ear piece in re-narrating the words of a criminal who had been orchestrating murders across the city.

The look in Sherlock's eyes when he thought John was Moriarty; it hurt John so much to see Sherlock like that. Sherlock almost shut down, John started to see the walls going up, and then Moriarty revealed himself.

Words were exchanged and Moriarty who called himself a consulting criminal left. Sherlock ripped the vest off of John and tossed it aside.

John leaned in and kissed Sherlock as hard as he could though the shakes of adrenaline. Sherlock pulled him into a tight hug and held him close retuning the kiss with a force that would knock John over if Sherlock hadn't been holding him.

The Doors behind them opened again.

"Sorry, boys! I'm soooooo changeable!" He said re-entering the pool. "It is a weakness with me but, to be fair to myself, it is my only weakness. Oh Oops am I interrupting something"

John and Sherlock pulled away from each other John sat on the ground the rush of adrenaline was leaving him and he was starting to shake.

"Now I have a way to make this interesting." Moriarty smiled. "My Pet, love can you come out here, Darling we're waiting"

The door opened and a very familiar woman stepped out. She was dressed in a dress set up to match Moriarty in his suit. Her long hair hung loosely around her face. She

was thinner then John remembered her, she looked almost sickly, as she walked she had a very prominent limp, it was probably why she carried the ornate wooden cane in her hand. When she looked up it was her eyes that got them. They looked so hollow and empty.

Moriarty leaned in and whispered to her.

He gave an evil smile.

"Have you ever trained anyone Sherlock? I mean like really trained them, broke them down until they were nothing only to build them up in your control." Moriarty asked as Willa went over and picked up the vest. "Don't be rude, Say hello to your brother Willa."

Willa looked up at Sherlock.

"Hello Sherlock" She said

"Now your former lover" Moriarty said, Willa turned to John

"Hello John" Willa said before taking a few components from the vest and leaving it on the ground again before heading back to Moriarty.

Sherlock aimed the gun at the vest.

"You shoot that you'll kill not only us but your sister as well" Moriarty smiled and pulled her close.

Lights from Moriarty's snipers danced on John and Sherlock.

The stare down began, the silence and tension was broken by Moriarty's phone as it started to ring, a tinny music version of the Bee Gees Staying Alive. They continued to look at each other before Moriarty just rolled his eyes.

"D'you mind if I get that?" He asked

"No, no, please. You've got the rest of your life." Sherlock said

Jim took his phone out with one hand and gripped Willa's wrist tight with the other.

He argued with someone on the phone. He put the phone on his shoulder and turned to face the men.

"Sorry. Wrong day to die." He said

"Oh. Did you get a better offer?" Sherlock said casually

Jim looked down at the phone, then turned and slowly started to walk away pulling Willa with him

"You'll be hearing from me, Sherlock." He said as he went through the door, "So if you have what you say you have, I will make you rich. If you don't, I'll make you into shoes." They heard him say as the door closed.

"She's alive" John said struggling to regain his feet.

"She's a prisoner" Sherlock said helping John up. "I suppose this changes everything between us"

"What no, I am with you now Sherlock nothing will change that" John said hugging him.

The next cases that followed were a sultry dominatrix that got the better of Sherlock. pity she was killed in her exile.

That one shook Sherlock. John could really see it he was more quiet at home. Not like his in the world persona but quiet. He'd seen him doing a few internet searches trying to find Moriarty and Willa.

A few weeks after that case which John nicknamed the Scandal in Belgravia they returned home to find Willa in 221B. She was shaking. She asked Sherlock and John to just forget her, to delete her and not try to help her. Moriarty had a control on her, he made her do things, he made her hurt people, she always tried to stop it but it was like she was locked in her mind and watching her body act.

Sherlock practically begged her to stay; they could help her, undo the conditioning.

"But he loves us, we're a happy little trio" Willa said with a smile "I cook with our Prince he cleans, we cuddle and watch movies, he loves the old classics our Prince loves romantic ones."

"Willa it's not love it's a control mechanism" Sherlock said standing and coming over to her.

As he neared her phone started to ring,

"But mama I'm in love with a criminal, and this type of love isn't rational, it's physical, Mama please don't cry, I will be alright, All reason aside I just can't deny, I love the guy"

Willa took out the phone. Sherlock heard Moriarty, it seemed like he was reciting a poem. Willa's eyes dulled. She looked at Sherlock, her expression went cold. She turned and abruptly left. Sherlock tried to follow but she took her cane and tripped him.

She turned "You never stopped me before why now?" With that she was gone as John helped Sherlock back to the sofa and got the ice while Sherlock called Mycroft.

Then was the bloody case in Baskerville where Sherlock tried to poisoned him with sugar, Then Moriarty made his move, he tried to discredit Sherlock. The press of course was having a field day tearing apart Sherlock. Kitty even published an article about Sherlock's fictitious sister. Painted Sherlock as a mad man who would do anything for a case. Said Moriarty was actor Richard Brooke and this Willa was Richard's partner. There was even a video clip released of Moriarty and Willa putting on a puppet show for kids in a hospital.

It all came to a head with Sherlock jumping, Sherlock jumped off of St. Bart's and that was it he was dead. During the funeral John saw a figure standing on the edge of the cemetery, it was Willa, She left when John saw her.

That meant she was alive, but how long would she last. With Moriarty gone she had no master. The type of control he had over her could fade, it was a trigger phrase. Sherlock had said it sounded like a poem. Would her mind recondition herself or would she just fade to nothing, or go mad.

Mycroft assured John that he would have his people try and track her down.

John only went back to Backer Street once after the funeral he packed his clothes and found another flat. He just couldn't be in that building alone.

He had debated also ending his life but he saw how Sherlock's suicide affected Mrs. Hudson and Lestrade and he couldn't do that to them.

Lestrade was actually a big help. Not that John talked much on the pub nights but he didn't let John be alone. He went into Baker Street to get the last of John's stuff too. Even found the birthday video Sherlock made.

John eventually started back at work. It was there he met Mary. She was a nurse, and she was a lovely woman, she too had seen loss, her husband had been killed in an accident a few years prior.

What started as friends going out for drinks to discuss mourning became dinners filled with laughter and with more intimate discussion.

Fourteen months after Sherlock died, Mary moved into John's new flat. John also started growing a moustache, he didn't really know why, figured it made him look distinguished.

Even as he became closer to Mary, he had that hold in his memory, Mary would never replace Sherlock. He loved Mary, but he still had that hole in his heart, in his very being that would never be filled.

After the first few months he stopped seeing Willa everywhere too. He knew all the times he had seen here it was just his imagination getting the best of him, but after a while he stopped thinking about her daily and she was dead just like Sherlock as far as John's mind was concerned.

Moriarty took away two of the best things he ever had in his life and John couldn't even beat the man for it, No Moriarty killed himself too. So John couldn't even get the satisfaction of killing him himself.

Mycroft was able to strategically release information to the press and Sherlock's good name was recovered and Moriarty was proven real. Not that that did any good. Sherlock was still dead.

After almost a year of living with Mary John decided that he was ready to take the next step. The one he had briefly though of taking with Sherlock.

He was going to ask Mary to become his wife. Part of this was because of the love John felt for Mary but deep down he knew it was also because he had already lost so much he was determined that he was not going to spend the rest of his life alone.

He made a reservation at The Landmark Hotel, The night was set, then everything went to hell.

The annoying French waiter was actually Sherlock, back from the dead never dead lied to John for two years Sherlock.

John hulled off and hit him, he was so angry, that got them kicked out of the restaurant so they relocated to a nearby café, John got mad as Sherlock seemed to play down John's emotions as not important. So he went at him again, this got them kicked out of the café, so they relocated to the nearby kabob shop where Mary helped Sherlock get napkins for Sherlock's now split lip.

Sherlock still didn't seem to grasp that John was livid at him, he acted like he did nothing wrong. John snapped again and head-butted Sherlock, while he didn't believe that he broke Sherlock's nose, he sure did make it bleed.

Mary grabbed a few more napkins as they were being escorted out of the shop and again tried to help Sherlock as he stood on the street. John was done with him, he was so mad, he just wanted to get a cab and leave.

On the way home Mary actually said that from what she saw and heard from Sherlock… she liked him.

That was not something John wanted to hear. He was so torn, he still loved Sherlock, but he was so mad at him, Sherlock said that he had done it to protect John, Lestrade, and Mrs. Hudson, but did he know how it felt to be abandoned and left behind, it felt like being betrayed and being lied to it hurt, it hurt him deeply.

The hole was filled but it wasn't mended.

John got captured drugged and put in a Bonfire he never heard Sherlock yell with such fear and panic. The first word out of John's mouth was Sherlock's name. He and Sherlock also deified a bomb in an abandoned subway car.

Sherlock and Mary got along very well, in fact Sherlock helped Mary plan the wedding, almost as much as John did, and actually John believed that Sherlock did more.

John married Mary and there was an attempt at murder at the wedding, of course life was never dull now, John's former commander James Sholto was the target, it was linked to a tragic mishap that had happened in Afghanistan under Major Sholto's watch a few years after John had been invalidated. End of the wedding, Sherlock accidently…. or was in in a sneaky way on purpose of telling John and Mary that they were going to be parents. This really complicated things. John had already decided that he was going to allow both Mary and Sherlock being in his life and being part of it, a child, a child made by him and Mary that was going to be a complication.

John sort of fell out of touch with Sherlock for a few days after the wedding; it was only when a neighbor wanted John to help her with her addict son did John find Sherlock in the drug den, he said it was for a case but the tests that Molly ran prove he was using again.

John blamed himself first and foremost. He had left Sherlock. That blame soon was elevated as they returned home, once Mycroft had poked the grizzly bear that was Sherlock and left, John met Janine, Mary's maid of honour, exiting Sherlock's (or as she called him Sherl's) bedroom, then went and joined him in the bath, she would hang off of him, and it well it really sickened John, but the blame crept back, John had only himself to blame for this, but no Sherlock was to blame too, if Sherlock hadn't faked his death John wouldn't have met Mary, so they were in this twisted mess together.

That night John learned that the relationship with Janine had all been a ruse to get closer to Janine's boss Charles Augustus Magnusson. The Napoleon of Blackmail as it had been put. Sherlock confronted Magnusson and was shot for the effort, not by Magnusson but rather by Mary, yes, John's Mary, for reason they still don't fully know, all they got was a memory stick with the initials A.G.R.A on it.

During Sherlock's recovery, when he wasn't leaving the hospital without notice to reveal Mary's secret or to meet with Magnusson, Sherlock would stare at the ceiling, John came to visit as did Lestrade, Sherlock told them how he had seen Willa a few time on his travels. She was with someone, someone Sherlock had not seen in a long time. Victor Trevor

When Sherlock said the name he closed his eyes tight tears could be seen forming.

John looked at Lestrade.

"Victor Trevor is an old acquaintance of Sherlock's" Lestrade said "He is the one who supplied Sherlock with whatever substance he wished to abuse"

"He was more than an acquaintance" Sherlock spoke eyes still shut tight the tears now slowly rolling down his cheeks. "He was my first"

"Your first what?" John asked

"Everything; he was my first attraction, my first date, my first boyfriend, my first lover, my first addiction." Sherlock paused and looked away. "It's how I first met Lestrade; he was the police constable that responded to the neighbors call when Trevor got carried away one night"

"Carried away!" Lestrade interjected "He broke your arm so badly it needed two surgeries, to get it fixed; he broke your jaw so you couldn't talk"

Sherlock looked down

"I was addicted, I had been an outsider all my life and this was a person who paid attention to me, who I thought loved me, I know the difference now. When I met John I felt attraction, but not just to his physical attributes or his mind, but to his essence his being, I knew I needed to be with him, but now I lost him, that is alright, he and Mary have a child to parent."

John leaned forward and kissed Sherlock; Lestrade raised an eyebrow as Sherlock just weakly returned the kiss.

"Mary is the mother of my Child, nothing more, especially after this, but you are forever the one who I love" John said Sherlock gave a small smile then drifted off to sleep as his new round of pain meds took hold.

Lestrade said nothing, he knew it was Mary who had shot Sherlock and he partially knew the reason why they were protecting her (beyond the fact she was pregnant with John's child). It was a very odd this life he was living now, one that had started when he met Sherlock all those years ago, the life that caused him to go grey, well he guessed grey at 50 wasn't bad, some of the ladies at the MET had called him a silver fox, he didn't really know what that meant but it didn't seem too bad.

When Sherlock was out of the hospital he wanted John and Mary to try and make things work, for not only the sake of the child but Sherlock understood that Mary was doing something she didn't want to, so the three, well four if you counted the child were off to Sherlock's parents for Christmas, Even Billy Wiggins the homeless person Sherlock had taken under his wing and Mycroft were there.

John went and sat with Mary in the sitting room. He asked for a divorce, he loved Sherlock, he still loved Mary but the trust was gone, she took it well, there were tears but they did agree that they would still raise the child together, co-parent, with Sherlock also being named as the child's father.

John and Sherlock would still help Mary with her case as Sherlock called it, they would still help her move further from her past and from the one who had control over her.

Then Mary fell asleep, and so did Mummy and Daddy Holmes, and Mycroft. Billy drugged everyone but Sherlock and John, so John and Sherlock could swipe Mycroft's laptop and go to Magnusson.

The Magnusson vault was a ruse a facade only in his mind much like Sherlock's mid palace.

John shot Magnusson, you'd think the people he had been blackmailing would be grateful but no, while Sherlock was not going to jail he was being exiled. You think the government would be grateful the man had so much of them under blackmail. You think they would be giving him a medal for Christ sake not sending him off into some suicide mission.

Then the TV's around England all switched to the same imagery as a familiar face in the picture displayed while the voice kept repeating.

"Miss me?"

Mycroft secured Sherlock a pardon, when they boarded the plane to see him, Sherlock looked a mess, he was high, his list was long, and John saw actual worry in Mycroft's eyes. Sherlock assured them that he was well enough to start on the case. That he knew what the next move may be.

"Could Willa be in on this?" John asked as they headed back to Baker Street.

"Probably, Victor Trevor is probably at the forefront of it all and using Willa like a pawn much like Moriarty did." Sherlock said "We don't know what Moriarty said to her before his actions on the roof. And I did almost catch up with her and Victor in Istanbul"

"When I saw her at the Cemetery when visiting your headstone, still feels weird to say that, she looked ill; I don't think he left her in charge of anything So it must be Trevor at the helm" John said.

"She left the country with Moriarty" Mycroft replied "the man who died on the roof top was actor Richard Brooks; he was probably under the same control as Willa." Mycroft said he felt the six eyes on him. "I never said anything because I didn't know until you were well into this ordeal with Magnusson, I actually found out for sure while you were still in the hospital recovering from your bullet wound. Victor Trevor was a name that came up as well but I didn't want to mention him to you at the time. I guess now I should have, I didn't realize he was with Willa"

"Is she back in London?" Sherlock asked with an annoyed glare at Mycroft.

"No" Mycroft said

Mary typed away at her phone.

"She was last in March, Cambridgeshire" Mary announced "I'd say that was back in England at least"

"March, Cambridgeshire" Sherlock frowned while thinking.

"Whitemoor!" Sherlock and Mycroft said together.

"Whitemoor?" John asked confused "What's Whitemoor"

"Her Majesty's Prison Whitemoor - March, Cambridgeshire" Sherlock said "Over 500 of England's most dangerous criminal are kept there including Military Prisoners that are too dangerous for the Military Prison in Colchester"

"Wait, they have Military prisoners" John said going a bit pale "Colonel Sebastian Moran is he a prisoner there?"

Mycroft looked out the window then down at the floor of the vehicle.

"Yes he is" Mycroft said removing his phone to call the prison to be on alert. As he dialed the phone vibrated he pressed answer "Hello, yes, yes, ok thank you"

"He escaped didn't he?" John asked leaning on the door of the car.

"There was a massive fire and raid at the prison, Moran was broken free," Mycroft said

"They chartered a plane to Istanbul" Mary said looking at her phone. Her other hand rubbed her stomach.

"Going to gather recruits" Sherlock said "Most likely sacrificed what men they had in the prison break."

"She's back with Moran, alright, what now?" John said as Mary grabbed his hand "Mary?"

"I know we said about going back to Baker Street but a hospital might be the best option" She said squeezing John's hand tight and breathing though a contraction.

"Oh yes of course, Mycroft please direct our driver to the nearest hospital" John said holding Mary.

They arrived at the hospital and Mary was taken in to a delivery room.

"You should get yourself looked over" Mycroft said to Sherlock who had found a seat in the waiting room.

"I'm fine" Sherlock said watching the doors that led to the delivery rooms.

"You practically overdosed!" Mycroft exclaimed as he came and knelt in front of Sherlock.

"But I didn't I'm here and I am fine. Oh I should call Lestrade let him know that the baby is on the way." Sherlock smiled as he took out his phone. "After all the godparents should be here. I should call Mrs. Hudson, she's the godmother, and first Lestrade can pick her up on the way.

Mycroft sighed and went to see if he could at least find a nurse to check Sherlock over.

Sherlock sat bolt upright as he heard the yell from the delivery rooms. There had been others but that was Mary it was very distinctive. Sherlock smiled and leaned in closer.

Three hours later, Sherlock, who had been given the clear by the nurse, Lestrade, Mrs. Hudson and Mycroft looked up and John exited the carrying a tiny bundle.

"She's here" He smiled, "Alice Wilhelmina Martha Watson-Holmes"

Sherlock stood and looked at the tiny girl "She has your nose, and lips, I hope she has your eyes"

John smiled and looked up and Sherlock, his face was right next to his, John had to fight the urge to kiss him.

"She's absolutely adorable" Greg said with a smile as he came over with Mrs. Hudson

"Thank you." John was just beaming. Mycroft stood and walked over as Mrs. Hudson fawned over Alice. She was so honored to have her name used as one of Alice's names.

"How is Mary?" Mycroft asked

"Tired, they are getting her settled in a room" John said starring at Alice with awe

Sherlock smiled as the nurse came, they all followed her to Mary's room. Mary was sleeping. Sherlock was the first of the men to hold the baby. Alice opened her eyes and seemed to stare at him. Greg swore he saw an impossible for a just born baby smile. Mycroft held her too abet for a short time, and then Greg took the little bundle in his arms.

"Oh wow" He said "thought I wouldn't remember how to do this."

"I didn't know you had children" Sherlock said looking at Greg with a sort of awe.

"I don't, well, I was 16 and her parents didn't approve. After she was born we only knew her for a few short hours before her parents came and declared that we had to sign up for the child to be adopted my mother was upset but agreed it was best. Sealed adoption never saw her again, was told even her name was changed from what we picked. My girlfriend left too. Her parents wanted me far away from her. I mean I held my cousin's babies when they were born but they're all teenagers now" Greg gave a small smile as he rubbed under Alice's chin she opened her eyes again and they seemed to light up.

"Well she certainly seems to like you lot" John smiled as Greg handed Alice back

"I should get back to work" He said "Give Mary my love when she wakes."

"I will thank you Greg" John smiled as the Detective Inspector left.

"You need some sleep John, I shall hold Alice and you nap" Sherlock smiled

"She can go in her bassinet Sherlock" John smiled

"No I want to hold her" Sherlock smiled taking Alice from John and settling back in one of the overstuffed chairs in the maternity room.

Mycroft and Mrs. Hudson said their goodbyes and headed out Mycroft would be dropping Mrs. Hudson off on the way. John curled up in the chair and slept.

Two hours later Sherlock and John were talking when Mary woke up and said she was hungry. John went off to find food. Sherlock was talking to Mary when his mobile rang.

"Hey freak" Donovan said on the line "Can you tell my boss he's way over due for being back, I know babies are cute but we have work to do"

"I'm afraid DI Lestrade left just over two hours ago" Sherlock replied as he stood and headed out into the hall heading down to the street. Greg's car was still in the parking spot. Now with a parking ticket as he was over the two-hour limit.

Sherlock headed ran back dialing Mycroft on his way back as he did he saw John.

John headed back up the street. He decided to treat Mary and had gone to the deli next to the hospital.

He was smiling as he rounded the corner to the side door of the Hospital; He looked up as he saw a shadow in his path.

As he looked up he saw a very familiar but worn face.

"Hello John" Willa said with nearly no emotion.

"Willa! You're alive" John smiled

"I am. And he needs you to come," Willa said

"What?" John asked as a van pulled up John felt himself being shoved in.

Down the street Sherlock took off into a run, Willa was in the passenger seat of the van, she gave a wave as they passed, Sherlock could see Mary laughing and smiling beside her as Moran drove.

Sherlock ran back inside the hospital and to the room, the nurse was just on the phone trying to reach security as a few of Mycroft's men arrive.

"Mr. Holmes?"

"They took John; they took Detective Inspector Lestrade as well. Mary went willingly, she left Alice." Sherlock said taking the crying child in his arms he looked at the nurse

"She's hungry could you prepare a bottle for me."

"Yes sir" the nurse said as she left.

Sherlock cradled Alice in his arms and sat in the overstuffed chair again, the nurse brought him a bottle and he began to feed Alice.

"They have my sister, she looks worse than she did the last time I saw her in Istanbul" Sherlock said as he fed Alice.

"Any idea where they would be heading" the agent asked

"The van was nondescript but the CCTV cameras should be able to see the license clearly. Have my brother call our parents, once Alice has eaten we will get her to the nursery and have Mrs. Hudson come sit with her until my mum arrives. Then I can help out there with the search."

The men nodded and left.

John groaned as they strapped him to the upright apparatus. Greg was beside him on what looked like the same thing, a makeshift upright table like they used in American prisons for lethal injections. These ones were homemade though, and instead of Velcro straps for their arms legs it was duct tape. They were naked save for their undergarments. John had never felt so exposed.

In front of them were two tables each with a cloth over them. Moran and Moriarty led Willa in. Moriarty smiled

"Now Willa I brought you some gifts. I need them worked over well and I need them to be broken and bleeding." Moriarty said arm wrapped around her.

She said nothing but looked on the verge of tears.

"I don't want to Jimmy, maybe Moran and Mary can do it this time? Or we can wait until Victor is back" she said barely able to make eye contact with Greg or John.

"No, no, no there's no fun or poetry to them doing it." Moriarty smiled and kissed her cheek "Besides you do it so well. With your MI-6 training and what I taught you, you're among the best"

Willa shivered and closed her eyes tears streaming down her cheeks. Moriarty leaned in close as Moran injected her with something and recited

"Woke one night, with a pain,

Hair was soaked, pillow stain.

There was nothing I could hear,

A human shadow did appear.

Slowly crept out of bed,

Stunned I stood, as I bled.

Could not hear the dripping sound,

As my blood, soaked the ground.

Could not move, I was engrossed,

As I stared at the ghost.

He was missing his right ear,

The ghost was me, it was clear."

With the last word, Willa's body relaxed, the tears were gone and her eyes were hard.

"Are you with me my pet?" Moriarty asked

"Yes my master" Willa replied but her voice felt and sounded so far away.

Moran lifted the cover on the first table, knives, a whip, and other sharp objects.

"Stage A my pet" Moriarty said and he and Moran left.

Willa slowly walked over to the other two and stood between them.

"Willa you don't have to do this." Greg said his reply was a smack across the face, Willa moved to standing in front of John. She used her finger to trace over the scar on his left shoulder.

"Willa, we can help you" John calmly said.

"No talking just screams" She said as she put her hands on his arm and shoulder, Willa made a quick move and it took all that was in John not to scream as she dislocated his bad shoulder.

Willa giggled like a school girl.

"I broke John, Sherlock will be so mad, I broke his boyfriend" Willa sort of said in a sing song voice as she moved over the Greg.

She traced her finger down the scar on his knee, the reminder of an injury that ended his hopes of ever having a professional football career. Almost as quickly as she acted with John she dislocated Greg's knee with a sickening snap. Greg bit back a cry causing him to bite his lip and draw blood.

"That's not nice" Willa said standing "I am the one who is supposed to make you bleed"

She took a long thin knife off the table, and stood nose to nose with Greg.

"Other Willa thinks you're handsome, I can fix that" She said slicing into Greg's check from the base of his ear to very near the corner of his mouth, the gash was not though his cheek but it was enough to send blood running down him.

She giggled again and went to work. Alternating between John and Greg, making tiny cuts, almost like paper cut, not enough to really bleed but enough to sting, she covered they're stomach and legs.

After an hour and a half she became a little weaker, the conditioning was wearing off, and her eyes were softening.

"Willa?" John tentatively asked.

"I'm sorry." She choked out as tears formed "Oh god what did I do. I'm sorry I'm sorry." She said sitting on the ground "Oh god Greg, I"

"It's not your fault" Greg said trying to give her a smile despite the pain and pull in his cheek.

Willa started to curl up tight on the floor when the door opened and Moran entered with a tray.

"Oh Willa, I'm sorry I should have come sooner, you really went to town and you expended yourself quicker than we thought." Moran said setting the tray down, He got Willa sitting on a nearby chair.

He fed her what looked like pasta, gave her plenty of water, and then injected her again. Then leaned and recited.

Her strong enchantments failing,

Her towers of fear in wreck,

Her limbecks dried of poisons

And the knife at her neck,

The Queen of air and darkness

Begins to shrill and cry,

"O young man, O my slayer,

To-morrow you shall die."

O Queen of air and darkness,

I think 'tis truth you say,

And I shall die tomorrow;

But you will die to-day.

Willa's eyes went hard again as she stood. Moran smiled and moved the cloth off the second table.

"Now Pet, Your master had said it's time for Stage B" Moran said running his hands over the blunt objects on the table. There was a pry bar, a truncheon that seemed an awful like Greg's, a mini cricket bat, and a mini mallet that was a cross between a coquette mallet and a sledge hammer. Willa picked it up with a creepy smiled.

"A gift from Mary" Moran said as he nuzzled in a kissed Willa's neck. He tuned to face the men as Willa made her way over to John.

She carefully knelt and ran her free hand down John's legs. She raised the mallet and brought it crashing down on John's left foot then his right, John cried out as he felt the bones break.

"I like this one" Willa sneered

"Well you'll have to write Mary a thank you note" John managed to say.

"Nice one John" Moran laughed "Tortured and still with a sense of humor. I'll leave you to it Willa. Victor will be back tonight, he has some lovely plans for you"

Moran turned and left.

"What are they giving you?" Greg asked as Willa circled him.

"It's it Devil or Dragons Breath?" John asked "It would make sense that's why you only vaguely remember what you did while in your trance"

"It's vitamins to keep me strong" Willa said as she stood in front of Greg, She brought her mallet down smashing his hand.

Greg swore under his breath then looked up at Willa.

"Willa" He started but was cut off by a blow to the head from her hand that didn't knock him out but rather dazed him.

Willa walked to the table and ran her hand over the other items, she picked up the truncheon. She swayed a little humming before slamming it into John's exposed side. She stopped and poked him before hitting him again.

John just kept talking, trying to distract her as she moved around, trying to make get the drugs and conditioning to wear off.

Willa went and laid down the truncheon and picked up a knife again.

"Willa please stop." Greg quietly said.

Willa didn't turn around instead she ran the knife over the spot where she had just hit John.

"Willa, this is not you, this is not the sweet young agent I saw sitting beside her brother as he recovered from his third overdose. The Willa I know is kind and caring. I remember when you were moving into your London flat because you wanted to keep an eye on Sherlock. You had just rekindled your relationship with him. You sat by his bedside for two weeks and even rode in the car with him on the way to Surrey and the treatment facility. I drove you out every weekend for the family visits." Greg kept talking even as Willa ran the knife down his body, from top of his shoulder all the way to his toes. She made little flourishes near his ankle and then his neck.

She stood and started to pace.

"Remember he did follow you, but you made it over the fence and he didn't, he twisted his leg and cut his foot. He ran another mile on that injured leg" Greg said "he blamed Mycroft for setting you off, for angering you like that. It was none of Mycroft's business who you liked." Greg continued.

Willa sat on the ground between the two men and started to rock.

"You forgave him, he forgave you, and you used your own experience with drugs to help him though his own addiction." Greg continued "I know it was hard for you to leave him again when your work called you away to Afghanistan. He missed you so much, I think that's why he threw himself fully into being a consulting detective for me"

Willa used the knife to trace a pattern on her arm opening a cut that swerved down her forearm elbow to wrist, though by her wrist it seemed not as deep.

"I learned a lot from you in Afghanistan" John spoke up. Willa half turned her head to look at him "You taught me how to make the best field pancakes I ever had, you taught me sign language"

Willa stood and faced John. She kissed him then pulled back.

"No that's not right, I don't belong to you anymore, I belong to Jim, and Victor" She said as she began to pace.

"You don't belong to anyone Willa" Greg said "You are a person not an object."

Willa paced and babbled something about I wasn't right before, about having no purpose, about being useless, no job with a limp, no field work, and no purpose.

"You don't need to be an MI-6 agent to have purpose." John said. "You told me you wanted to run a music school, I loved listening to you play the violin and I would love to hear you play the cello, that's your primary instrument right?"

Willa gave a nod. John let himself smile a little.

"But I can't, I have to stay with Jimmy and Victor, If I leave them I die" Willa said still pacing, she reached up and smacked her head hard with her hand "No, no, no that's just what he says, I lasted a year before Mary and Victor came, but I was sick, I couldn't eat"

John just listened, long term control with drugs and other mid control techniques. Jim and Victor seemed very abusive too, and Mary, it wasn't girls weekends to the country she was traveling to France to help Jim and Victor condition Willa.

"We can help" John said the blood loss was getting to him as was the pain he was starting to feel week.

"I will help you." Greg said "It can be like it was, I still owe you that trip to Blackpool, I was going to try and win you a stuffed animal at one of those rigged skill games and you owe me the scotch tour in Scotland"

John didn't mean to but he smiled. One night when they were near Kabul Willa had gotten a little tipsy on the homebrew a local unit had made, she told John that even though she had an intimate relationship with Anthea, she had this wonderful relationship with a detective from the local constabulary. Anthea like him too and said that if Willa even managed to snag him Anthea wouldn't mind.

Greg was that Detective She had mentioned.

Willa was crying and apologizing again, the control had worn off. She walked over and kissed Greg, harder then she had kissed John.

The door opened and in walked Moriarty with Victor.

"Oh Willa my pet, how could you?" He said as Victor pulled Willa away from Greg. Moriarty produced a gun from behind his back and shot Willa in the hip. "And that is your punishment my pet"

Victor, pulled her close and gave her a long hard kiss before he dropped her to the ground. As he did voices echoed in the hall Moriarty and Victor looked up then left, there was arguing then gunshots, Victor (who had a bloody nose) and Moriarty ran though the room with Moran, Moran stopped long enough to add a bullet in Willa's chest. They were followed by Mary she stopped for a moment in front of John. She gave an eerie smiled then slammed her fist down on his already dislocated shoulder before she and Moran fled down the hall after Moriarty and Victor.

Sherlock and Mycroft and some of Mycroft's men burst through the main door. Sherlock went instantly to John and started working on loosening the tape.

"My shoulder" John said though gritted teeth. Sherlock just nodded.

"His feet too" Willa said as she tried to sit.

"You stay down Willa, the paramedics will help you too" Mycroft said kneeling by her, Behind him paramedics worked on freeing Greg from his bonds.

"Just end me now" Willa said through tears "I don't want to hurt anyone else"

"You won't" Mycroft said his tone softer and more gentle then any of the men had ever heard it before "I will get you help, all the help you need, I can find specialists, we can undo all that he has done." Mycroft leaned down and kissed her forehead. The paramedics had everyone loaded and headed for the hospital.

John woke, his head was fuzzy and he hurt, all over, from the dull ache of his head to the pain in his feet, arm and side. He turned his head to face the weight on the bed; beside him Sherlock was curled up head on his good shoulder hand resting just below his injured ribs. He blinked and looked past Sherlock to see Greg in the bed next to his. Greg's hand was casted, he was covered in bandages covering his cuts, his face was bandaged as was the long cut down his body, and his knee was encased in an immobilizer and propped up on pillows. John looked down his own feet were incased in casts and also slightly elevated with his knees bent and the pillows under them. Mummy Holmes was sitting between the beds.

"Morning love" Mummy Holmes said kissing his forehead gently.

"Thank you" John smiled then panicked "Where's Alice!"

"She is in the Hospital Nursery; Anthea is sitting with her now, sent Martha home to rest"

"I want to see her later" John said

"Of course" Mummy answered "For now here are some pictures" she showed John the pictures and he smiled.

"Is Sherlock alright?" he asked noticing the cast on Sherlock's hand

"Mycroft said he broke it on the face of someone named Victor" Mummy Holmes said. "Said he had hurt him in the past and was now hurting Willa"

"Where is Willa?" John asked with worry last he'd seen there had been a bullet entering her upper chest.

"She's in an isolated private room" Mummy Holmes answered "Mycroft and her Father are with her. She had surgery to repair her collar bone and hip, she will need another one on her hip"

"Has she awoken? How is she mentally?" John asked

"She was awake last night, mostly cried, she doesn't think she deserves help, she says she should be punished" Mummy said as Sherlock stirred.

"She's asking for jail?" John asked

"She's asking for death" Sherlock said in almost a low whisper.

"Oh" John replied Sherlock gave a nod almost like a scared child.

"Then we talk to her help her" a voice said from behind them. Greg was awake and trying to sit. Mummy Holmes hurried over to him.

"You rest" She said putting her hand on his chest. "You have a lot of stitches and it would do you no good pulling any of them."

Greg just nodded and eased himself back.

"You may want to see her but she may not want to see you" Mummy said sitting on the edge of Greg's bed "Her mind is very scrambled right now and she thinks that you all hate her."

Mummy paused as she remembered the pain in Mycroft's voice when he told her that overnight Willa had begged him to kill her, that she hurt the ones she loved so much that she felt she was better off dead. Mycroft had broken down in tears. That's when Mummy Holmes sent Daddy up to sit with them. There was also a guard there as Willa was on suicide watch. Not that she could do much. Her left arm was in an immobilizer after the bullet Moran fired shattered her collar bone before tearing though her chest just barely missing her lung and heart, her right was bandaged from the cut she had made. And her hip was encased in another external frame. All the hardware she's gotten in years ago after Afghanistan had to be redone.

Sherlock had been very grateful that John was not also in need of such repair, though he did need surgery to fix the dislocated joint, the hardware was all intact.

"We tried to help her" Greg said "John and I we kept talking to her, we really got through to her too, I think"

"You did Greg" Mummy Holmes said kissing his forehead. He just nodded and yawned "You sleep, you need rest"

He gave a tiny nod and slept. John dozed as Sherlock ran his fingers though his hair.

Willa lay in the bed starring at the ceiling, had it been a week or two weeks since she'd been brought to the new facility from the private operating recovery room.

She was now in a private room in the infirmary wing at The Maudsley Hospital, it was the same one she had been to years ago for her addictions treatment. They were the best, and Mycroft said she needed and deserved the best.

She slept most of the time so it was hard to tell the passage of time. Someone was always with her though. Not just the medical staff. Daddy and Mycroft had been with her for a while, Anthea came once too, Mummy came, then Sherlock. That was last night Sherlock had been there…. Or was that the day before, he said when he returned he would have a special visitor.

She'd already had several visits from doctors as well, they talked directly to her sometimes then other times they would talk to whoever was with her. Mostly about treatment, she was going to be undergoing a lot of tests, they thought most of the control had been from the drugs, but she would still be undergoing some hypnotherapy and other relaxation therapy to make sure there was nothing else controlling her, and that the poems that were used (they had found a book that had been dropped by a fleeing Moriarty and it had all the poems underlined and notated what each were for) The doctors said this could be all undone.

She barely ate it hurt too much to sit to eat. Usually Mycroft helped her eat, Anthea helped her eat the grilled chicken she had made her... it was one of Willa's favorites, but she could only eat about a quarter before needing to lay down again.

Willa heard her room door open.

"Morning Willa" Sherlock said. Willa heard the turning wheels, just a small squeak. She turned her head and saw Sherlock was pushing a wheelchair, John was riding in it, both his feet were still in casts and his arm was still held tight against him in the immobilizer but most of the bruises had faded and the cuts were healing. He smiled as he saw Willa.

"Hello Willa"

"Hi John" She said her eyes watered as Sherlock parked the wheelchair by the bed.

John took her hand in his good hand

"No tears Willa, please." He kissed her hand "I am here to say I forgive you. Although that is odd to say and I don't even blame you for this to begin with. Your hand may have held the tools but they were not controlled by you, they were controlled by Victor, Moriarty, Moran, and" John paused and swallowed "and Mary" his voice cracked a little.

"I tried to warn you and Sherlock when I knew who it was you who Mary would talk about, but I couldn't get away." Willa was crying "I'm sorry you said no tears, I'm so sorry"

Sherlock moved his hand to wipe her tears and she flinched back.

"I'm sorry" Sherlock quietly said before gently wiping the tears from her eyes.

She just looked away.

Sherlock bushed some hair off her face then sat back in his chair.

"Willa, Do you accept my forgiveness?" John asked

"Yes" She replied quietly "Although you didn't need to give it I don't deserve it:

"Of course you do silly" Joh said kissing her hand again. "Now we need to work on your recovery, not only everything going on in your head but I need a best man for my wedding"

"Your wedding?" Willa asked confused.

"Yes I proposed to Sherlock two days ago. It's something I should have done two years ago, but now we are back together, and Mycroft is rushing though papers for Sherlock to adopt Alice and so it's time Sherlock and I married" John smiled, he could see the faintest hint of a smile on her lips "If we have your blessing that is?"

"Of course" Willa replied "I still love you in this own unique way John, but you and Sherlock are meant to be together." Willa said turning and facing Sherlock

"Excellent" John continued "Then it's settled, you will be my best man or I guess woman"

"Why?" Willa asked

"Sherlock is my best friend but he should have never been my best man, he should have always been my fellow groom. You are my other best friend. I know what we've seen of each other since Afghanistan hadn't been the nicest but I still have my connection with you. If we hadn't been in the fight, if we hadn't been shot, I don't think we would have lasted as a couple but I am bloody sure we would be great mates" John smiled "So I'd like to make up for all that, do some catch up, help you and have you stand for me at our wedding."

Willa smiled and nodded

"Don't plan it too soon" she said as her smile fell and she looked back at the ceiling "They'll probably tell you this is a good day for me, but the bad ones the ones full of confusion and hate, and anger, they outnumber the good ones right now."

"We won't do anything until we are all well enough" John said kissing her hand again "Oh I almost forgot, we brought you some pictures of Alice for your board"

John handed the pictures to Daddy Holmes who hung them on a bulletin board they had put in Willa's room with family pictures"

"She's adorable" Willa smiled then yawned. Sherlock sang and soon she was asleep. Sherlock looked over at John with a smile.

"That's the most we've got her to talk in a while" He smiled "I can't wait till we bring Lestrade in, He'll get her talking more"

"And probably smiling more too" Mummy Holmes added with her own smile. "If she smiled the way she did at Anthea she will smile at Greg"

"And we should tell her Lestrade is a single man" Sherlock said "She never liked his wife said she was shrewish, and never talked nicely to Greg, He should have left her after the wedding when he learned the pregnancy was a scam."

"What?" John said looking up.

"Greg was on his way to the pros with Football, she said she was pregnant and he did the honorable thing an married her, he then learned it was false, he's too good natured and believed her story that she read the test wrong," Sherlock huffed and continued "then he wreaked his knee, and set out to fulfil another boyhood dream to be a police officer. He's more suited for work at the yard. He's the best they got and would be better if he only put that mind of his to better use than football and rugby scores and stats."

"And the solar system" Mycroft smirked

Sherlock just shot him a look.

"She stayed with him but slept around, she would have continued trying to make him look the fool if I hadn't pointed it out, no I think her knew but, he's so damned honorable, treats women like gold but he's been unlucky" Sherlock looked up at John "You should have seen the three of them, Greg, Anthea and Willa, always off on some weekend adventure."

Mycroft leaned forward with his mobile in hand. "I don't know why I keep it on there, it's been though six phones, but it makes me smile."

John let go of Willa's hand and took the mobile holding it on its side, on its screen was a picture of them on top of a roller coaster at Thorpe Park when they had climbed as part of a coaster climb they looked absolutely ecstatic excited and having so much fun.

"They'll be lucky to have each other" John smiled.

"If we can get them back together" Anthea said entering, her ever present blackberry was nowhere to be seen "She's convinced that Greg will never want to see her again, no matter what we do, when the doctors suggested a visit she freaked out"

"Oh." John said as Mycroft took his mobile back. "Why not freak out with me, we had a relationship?"

"You've moved on, I've moved on, Greg is free, Greg is available" Anthea said sitting by John "Plus it may have been something Moran or Mary programmed in, or Victor. Victor is very possessive, if he made Willa his"

"She has lots of healed bruises and cuts, Victor likes to bruise people, especially where others can't see" Sherlock added

John nodded and watched the sleeping Willa.

Willa's good days became further apart and only one family member was allowed in to the room. Mummy and Sherlock took turns. When she was starting to heal a little more she was moved to a different treatment wing. But again could only have one visitor at a time.

It took its toll on Sherlock. He would pace the flat in-between visiting hours and on days when his Mum went. John was still wheelchair bound as his feet were slow to heal after he developed an infection and although he was just starting physio on his shoulder the joint was not stable enough for using crutches.

Mummy and Daddy Holmes, who were staying in John's old room, insisted that Greg come at stay with them, they were so worried about him going home alone. So a cot was set up in the sitting room. Greg may have been released from the hospital but he was not doing too well.

Actually all three of the men weren't well, physically or mentally. Sherlock was more quiet then John had ever seen him. Greg just slept a lot, John had nightmares, and all three hardly ate.

Sherlock had brought up the possibility of Greg visiting Willa, Willa freaked out, she said he couldn't come that John couldn't come either, she had hurt them and they hated her.

Sherlock had been barred from seeing Willa for a few days after that, that didn't do anything to help Sherlock, he was quiet.

He doted on Alice though, He insisted that her crib be in the room with he and John, he was up several times a night feeding or changing her. In the morning he would allow Dad or Mum to hold her while he showered and got dressed, then he before the baring he would go off to see Willa till just after lunch (in the afternoon is when she had most of her appointments) and when he returned he took over care of John and Alice once again. He did fuss of Greg a little too.

Greg was almost worst of all of them, physically, his knee was not healing well and he faced even more surgeries, The hospital had given him a crutch that his forearm rested on so that there was no pressure on his hand which was nearly healed, the scar on his face was a little prominent then the thought it would be, the doctor at the casualty did a wonderful job but Greg had refused the plastic surgeon, he didn't want to add on another surgery on top of the once he may face for his knee. The scar from the long cut was barely noticeable when he was dressed; all you could see in his t-shirt was the part that wisped up on his neck. Mentally, he blamed a lot of what happened to Willa on himself, everything from the time she left England for Afghanistan to now.

He knew she had moved to France and got it in his mind that she didn't want to ever see him again and so he never went. He really wished he had gone, none of this would have happened if he had just gone to see her. But most of all he had wished that he had listened to not only his gut but to Sherlock when the man first brought up Marjorie (his ex-wife)'s infidelity. Marjorie was always jealous of the time Greg spent with Willa and Anthea. She might have known that the attraction was there that even though Anthea and Willa were together, well together but not committed they were just having fun, he wanted to be a part of that. But Marjorie didn't like the trips on Motorcycles up to Edinburgh or the amusement park thrill rides.

Greg had followed Willa to the airfield where she was flying out of to head back to Afghanistan. But he didn't enter Anthea arrived and pulled him in told him that what was going on between her and Willa was lust, but what could happen between Greg and Willa could be love, but it was too late the plane had left.

Greg returned home, his wife unaware where he had been carried on as if nothing changed.

Now he wished he could just simply hold Willa, even just see her.

They all tried to do their best for him but knew what he really needed was to see Willa.

John and Greg had been ordered by the doctors to see a therapist John just went back to Ella not that he liked her but he really didn't feel like explaining his life history to a new person. Greg was seeing one appointed by the MET. Though Greg had told him he never talked much in the sessions, yes the therapist was good at coping techniques and relaxation methods to help deal with the nightmares Greg had been having, but how would this person ever really truly understand what Greg went though. John told him he had the same feelings when going to see Ella. Most nights after Sherlock's body gave into exhaustion John and Greg would still be in the sitting room, John in his chair, Greg on the sofa and they would talk, that's what really helped.

The day Sherlock could return to visit Willa he practically ran out the door after his few measly bites of breakfast.

John settled into his chair with Alice and started reading her a story, Greg finished starring at his untouched breakfast and went back to lay in his cot. Mummy Holmes helped get his leg elevated, they were doing everything to try and stave off another surgery, the infections had all cleared and they just had to see if the swelling went down and if the ligaments were knitting. John was looking forward to maybe getting walking casts soon. It would make it easier to get in and out of the flat.

Daddy Holmes sat on the sofa reading the morning paper, the house was quiet.

"I think we should have a nice big dinner tonight" Mummy Holmes smiled

"Not too big, I don't think I could eat a lot" Greg said

"Nonsense you boys need to start eating more than a few crumbs, you are all becoming too thin, you and John are losing all your muscle and Sherlock, if he loses any more weight he'll disappear when turning sideways, or worse all of you will wind back up in Hospital. And we are not letting that happen, what is your favorite food John" Mummy Holmes said turning to face the chair

"I ah, never really said to anyone but I love Cornish pasty, my aunt used to make the best." John smiled

"Ok it's settled, dinner tonight will be Cornish pastey for John, Scotch Eggs for Greg, Toad in the Hole for Sherlock, his favorite since childhood, we'll have some potatoes and Sherlock does love mushy peas, and for desert, Bakewell Tart for Sherlock, strawberries and cream for Greg and I believe at Christmas you said you loved my Eccles cakes, there it's settled all the favorites will get you boys to eat. Father will be here to help should you need anything. I am going shopping"

Mummy Holmes went and gathered her purse she kissed John, Greg and Alice's foreheads then headed out.

Greg smiled "You know Mrs. Holmes and my Mum; they would have got along like two peas in a pod. Wish they could have met"

"My mom would have ignored her and called her too posh." John sighed "Mrs. Holmes has been more of a mother to me in the short time I've known her then my mother was the entire time I knew her."

"Sorry" Greg said picking up his book

"It's ok, if not for my past I wouldn't have my future" John said as Alice drifted off to sleep

"Ella tell you that?" Greg allowed himself a smirk

"Fortune cookie" John smiled and Greg laughed, first time he's laughed in the near month since this all started.

Greg looked to where Daddy Holmes was reading

"Sorry sir, your misses is going off making all our favorites and none of yours" Greg said

"She is making my favorites, anything she wishes to make is my favorite" Daddy Holmes smiled

"You have a wonderful relationship" John added

"It's had its hardships like any relationship, but that's what makes the bond stronger." Daddy Holmes smiled.

John and Greg smiled.

Sherlock reentered the apartment and went to hang up his jacket.

"How is she" Greg and John asked in unison

"She's back in the infirmary wing. " Sherlock said sitting in his chair "She had a bad session yesterday and lashed out, she hit her hand on the table and broke her fifth metacarpal, it is casted won't need surgery thankfully."

John reached over and gave his had a squeeze

"She was doing better; she had a real breakthrough on Monday. She said she wanted to see Greg" Sherlock said looking up at Greg who was still lying on the cot now with ice on his knee. "But I don't know what happened yesterday. It was something in the group therapy"

"She liked the group therapy" Mummy Holmes spoke up from the kitchen where she was cooking "Said there's that lovely young lady from Chelmsford, the one who plays the piano at all hours, oh what's her name"

Sherlock's head dropped and he sighed.

"Her name was Farah." Sherlock sighed "There was a lit candle and a peace lily plant on the reception desk, the name card read for Farah. I was worried about what condition Willa was in that it didn't click till now. That along with the fact that the patient with the developmental disorder, Corrine she copycat injured her hand, she's latched onto Willa and has made her, her hero. It's hard; everything Willa does Corrine mimics, although Willa has said it is a good encouragement to get better"

Mummy Holmes came over and hugged Sherlock.

"I'll see if we can arrange for us both to go see her tomorrow, we can talk with her about it ok, Maybe we can arrange for Alice to come she liked it when Alice was able to visit" Mummy said Sherlock just nodded and looked at Alice who was sleeping in her chair. "Now, supper will be ready in about an hour?" She asked heading back to the kitchen.

"I'm going to lie down" Sherlock said standing and heading for his bedroom.

"I'll come with you." John said as he started to ease his chair forward. Sherlock moved behind and guided the chair into the bed room.

Once in the bedroom John got comfortable sitting with his back on pillows up against the headboard. Sherlock climbed up and curled up tight with his head on John's lap.

He knew Sherlock was hurting. Sherlock hated being helpless and he felt helpless to help his sister. John just rubbed his back as he felt the sobbing start.

Sherlock would never admit it outright in public but he was a wreak, nearly loosing John, nearly loosing Willa, it had affected him deeper then John ever really thought it would. Sherlock wandered the flat the first night they were home, and John honestly believed that if Mum and Dad were not upstairs Sherlock would have gone off looking for a fix. That and Alice, He loved Alice as if she were his own. Mycroft had made sure that the birth certificate was changed and listing Sherlock as a father alongside John.

It hadn't been long since Sherlock last used on the plane when he thought he was going to be exiled forever. John knew that the want that hunger to use did not go away easily and sometimes it never did. But John would be here with him, they would navigate this together.

A/N the poems first is Ghost from the second is Her Strong Enchantments Failing by A.E Housman