Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek
A/N: Many thanks to sevs_girl72 on LJ for the beta. The title comes from Percy B. Shelley's poem Ozymandias. All chapter titles are taken from Hanson's song Bridges of Stone. And thank you to my brother for helping me with the Chess game.

The Lone and Level Sands

Chapter One
In this Game We Play

James Kirk lay back on his bed, staring up at the ceiling of his cabin, wishing the sterile metal above him was at least tiled so he could have something to count. He would much rather focus on some sort of task than on the meandering thoughts that came unbidden to the forefront of his mind.

He had, in his opinion, been lying there trying not to think for far too long, particularly when he considered that he was failing at the not thinking and his mind was just going every which way it possibly could, especially the way he didn't want it to. He wished they'd run into an unexplored planet so he could have something else to think about, something pressing, but they had only just left Earth a few days before and there was enough explored space between them and the unknown to leave him bored and his mind jumbled.

And every time he thought maybe he'd finally be able to relax, his mind went right back to where he didn't want it to go: Spock.

He had all those memories that older Spock had given him, and all the feelings and emotions that went with them, and they were making him more than a little crazy. He felt like he and the younger Spock should have that relationship, that friendship the older Spock talked about, but they didn't and it was frustrating. He felt like he was letting the older Spock (and his other self, he supposed) down somehow.

He felt like he wasn't trying hard enough.

He'd thought (assumed?) that after everything they went through on the Narada, after having to fight for their lives, that they would at least be closer to being friends. Certainly, their relationship had definitely changed. It was more civil than before, and maybe more friendly in a way, but it wasn't really friendship.

Not yet.

In all honesty, Jim wasn't entirely certain where he stood with his first officer. Right when he thought he had it figured out, something would happen that would make him reconsider. Maybe he'd say something that caused Spock to turn all tight lipped and cold, or Spock would ramble off something about logic that Jim understood but didn't see the point of and it felt like they were back at square one.

It was frustrating and annoying and he just wished it made sense.

Jim groaned and pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes, pushing the thoughts aside. Being alone was obviously not an option at this point, and over thinking everything was not going to help, so he hopped up from his bed. He grabbed his tunic and pulled it on, taking a brief moment to admire the look of the gold on him (again) before jogging out the door and down the corridor to the turbo lift.

"Deck five," he called out as he slid to a halt inside. He clutched at the handle on the side of the lift, keeping his energy up to keep his mind from settling back on the same topic. When the doors opened, he bolted down the hall, plastering a grin on his face, and ducked into Sickbay.

Bones was behind his desk, squinting down at a PADD. Probably some medical text he wanted to refresh himself on or something, Jim thought. He rapped lightly on the door frame and Bones held up his 'just a minute' finger. Jim's grin grew a little wider and he cleared his throat.

"Is that how you act when your Captain wants to speak with you, Doctor?" he asked, keeping his voice as formal as possible and standing up straight. Never mind the fact that he was smiling – not that it mattered since Bones didn't even look up.

"Just a minute, Jim," Bones said, scrolling through the PADD, obviously reading whatever it was very carefully.

Jim decided on a different tact. He crossed his arms over his chest, doing his best to pout, and tried again, "What could you possibly be reading that's more important than me?"

Finally, Bones looked up. "That depends on why you're here."

"What if I was hurt?"

"Then Chapel would have already put you on a bed and come to get me," Bones said with a shrug, leaning back in his chair. "Unless it wasn't that serious, in which case she would've treated you and let you go."

Jim shook his head and walked into the room, leaning against Bones' desk. "What if I wanted you to treat me and wouldn't accept Nurse Chapel's help?"

"Then you'd be a moron," Bones said easily. "I have a very competent staff, and you know it."

"Yes, but no one has a bedside manner quite like yours." All pretense was gone, Jim was grinning like a maniac and he was pretty sure that weird scoffing sound was actually Bones chuckling (not that he was about to ask) and that was enough of an accomplishment for the day.

Bones sighed and shook his head. "Sometimes I wonder how you got a command so damn fast," he said.

If Jim's grin could've gotten wider, it would have. As it was, he just winked. "And then you reread the report on the fight with the Narada and you remember, right?"

"Nope," Bones said, a smile tugging at his mouth. "I reread it and keep wondering."

"Very funny," Jim mumbled, glaring at his friend. "Now, c'mon, Doc, I need your help."

"With what?"

Jim pushed the pile of PADDs to the side and slid up to sit on Bones' desk, swinging his legs out in front of him and watching his friend carefully. "I need my head shrunk," he said.

"Yes, well, I am not a shrink," Bones replied, quick and easy, like their banter always was.

Jim shrugged. "You took psychology courses," he said. Pushing the issue like he always did, like he needed to this time.

"That doesn't make me qualified. We have plenty of certified psychologists on board, Jim, go see one of them. I hear Doctor Dehner is particularly good."

Jim rolled his eyes. "You're missing the point, Bones," he said as petulantly as he could. "I want to talk to you because you're my friend."

Bones grunted. "Get more friends," he muttered, grabbing another PADD and bending his head low to read it, avoiding the much exaggerated pout Jim was sending his way.

"C'mon, Bones!" Jim slid off the desk and pulled the extra chair over to sit down properly. "You gotta help me."

"Fine, speak."

"It's about Spock."

"Of course it is." Bones leaned back and put the PADD aside, looking Jim in the eye, his arms crossed over his chest.

It unnerved Jim more than a little that Bones had been expecting this. "Uh, yeah," he said. He swallowed and shook his head and tried to think of how to continue, but he couldn't think of anything but, "how did you know?"

Bones shrugged. "You've been acting odd around him since we shipped out," he said. "Like you're not entirely sure where you stand. To be honest, I was wondering if you'd slept with him. Or, well, wanted to sleep with him, considering that whole thing he's got with Uhura." Bones waved his hand to the side in a noncommittal gesture, and Jim watched it for a minute, wrapping his head around what Bones had said.

When it sank in, he snapped his eyes back to Bones' face. "What?" Jim asked. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, trying to think of what to say. He knew he probably looked like a fish out of water, but he really didn't care that much considering he felt like one, too? "You didn't…you can't…No! What made you think a thing like that?!"

Bones shrugged again, obviously struggling not to laugh. "Hey, that's usually how that little dance works," he said. "I've been there, and I've seen you there, too."

"What? Dance? When?" Jim cursed Bones for having that irritating ability to make him inarticulate.

"At the academy," Bones elaborated. "You slept with enough people that you were bound to get a few awkward encounters after. And you did. I'm surprised you didn't notice. Then again, you were probably too busy trying to pick up the next night's date."

"Your opinion of me is just so positive," Jim said, shaking his head. "Thank you."

"It's not an opinion, Jim, it's a fact," Bones said. "Besides, you're not here to talk about your academy affairs. What about our pointy eared friend has you so muddled?"

"I told you about meeting that other Spock, right?" Jim asked, glad to change the subject, though he did vow to get Bones back somehow for this.

Bones nodded. "Quite a few times."

"Yeah, well, he mind melded with me."

"I think you mentioned that."

"All right, well, he also told me that me and Spock are supposed to be friends."

Silence hung over the room for a few minutes, then Bones blinked and shook his head. "Wait," he asked, "that's what you wanted to tell me?"

"Well, yeah," Jim said. "I wanted to know what you think I should do. I mean, I thought maybe we'd be closer to that by now, after the whole fighting for our lives thing, but, uh, I don't know if 'friend' is the term I'd use for us right now."

Bones laughed. Jim stared at him, wondering if it would be amiss for the Captain of a star ship to punch his Chief Medical Officer. It probably would, but Bones was making it extremely tempting at the moment, laughing that full bellied laugh of his, with his head thrown back and everything.

Jim clenched his fists against his thighs. "It's not funny," he said.

The laughter died down and Bones took a deep breath, lowering his head to look at Jim again. "Yes it is," he said, a light chuckle still in his voice. "You thought it would be that easy? A mind meld and a gun fight and then you guys would be bosom buddies?"

"I dunno," Jim mumbled, suddenly feeing very embarrassed.

"It ain't that simple, Jim," Bones said. "Friendship isn't something that happens because some crazy old Vulcan told you it would, it takes time." He shrugged. "Just wait and see."

"I just…I thought," Jim sighed. "I assumed it would be easier than this."

"Yeah, well, you know what they say," Bones said, pulling the PADD he had discarded earlier off the desk and scrolling through it.

Jim didn't bother to ask what they said. He stood, waving absentmindedly at his friend, then left the Sick Bay. He meandered through the corridors of the ship for awhile, listening to the constant calming hum she made and letting her keep his mind off of his green-blooded problem.

He was on his ship, with his crew. He was Captain, and they were exploring the galaxy. So what if he and his first officer weren't best buds?

When he reached the lounge, however, his contentment vanished.

Spock was seated at a table playing a game of chess against Chekov. The young Russian was putting up a good fight, but Jim could tell he'd be mated in four turns. Three, if Spock didn't rely so much on logic.

Jim carefully stepped up to the table, making sure both players knew of his arrival, then took a seat to watch the rest of the game. As he had guessed, it didn't last much longer. Spock mated Chekov in those four moves, and the Ensign moved off to join Sulu and Scotty a few tables over in a game of cards. Complete with a bottle of scotch to go around.

Jim watched them for a few moments, smiling at the camaraderie that was already settling over his crew. It was good to see the friendship arising, to watch the interactions and see that even long after their terms on the Enterprise, these men and women would remember each other.

"Did you want to play, Captain?" Spock's voice broke through Jim's strange little reverie, pulling him back to the 3D chess set before him.

Jim shrugged. "Sure, why not," he said, moving to sit in the chair Chekov had just vacated while Spock reset the board. "I suppose you want to be black?" he asked, watching as Spock carefully set up the pieces. He focused his attention on the Vulcan's slim fingers, watching them hold and release each piece in its place.

"It is only logical," Spock replied. "I am older than you."

"And you won't let me forget it, right?" Jim asked, grinning.

Spock looked up at him, an eyebrow raised in puzzlement. "I do not recall ever excessively reminding you of our age difference," he said.

Jim sighed. "It's a figure of speech," he said, examining the board for a few minutes. He moved his king's bishop's pawn, a typical opening move. One that Spock would be expecting.

Spock countered with his own pawn. "I apologize," he said as he moved the piece two squares forward and to the neutral level. "I'm afraid I am not as accustomed to Human figures of speech as I would like to be."

Jim nodded slowly, looking over his options. He played out a few turns in his mind, wondering what Spock was expecting him to do. Depending on Spock's moves, Jim was pretty sure he could mate quickly, and since Jim was sure it was easier for him to predict Spock's moves than for Spock to predict his, he wouldn't be surprised if he did just that.

He developed his queen's knight, setting it down where his pawn had been at the beginning of the game.

"Fascinating," Spock mumbled. Jim smiled and leaned back in his chair, content that he would win this game.

He watched Spock thinking, wondering if he should make some sort of small talk. Questions shifted around in his mind, many of them far more personal than Jim thought polite. There was so much about his first officer that he didn't really know, and as Spock made his move (queen's bishop's pawn), Jim decided he'd eventually have to ask those personal questions anyway, so why not do it now.

"How are you and Lieutenant Uhura doing?" he asked, carefully watching Spock even while he surveyed the board.

His first officer's expression remained as impassive as always as he clasped his hands in front of him and fixed his gaze steadily on Jim. "We have decided to terminate our romantic relationship," he said matter-of-factly.

Jim was pretty sure only a Vulcan could be that cool about a break up. "And why did you do that?" he asked, moving his king's knight's pawn, having decided to give Spock more of a fighting chance.

"We discussed the issue and determined it would be better for the mission if we kept our relationship professional," Spock replied, shifting his king's bishop forward a few spaces. "It was Lieutenant Uhura's idea, and her logic was sound, so I saw no reason to question her conclusion."

"So it was mutual?" Jim asked. Spock nodded. "Well, that's good." Jim nodded his head slowly, barely paying attention as he made his next move - queen's bishop's pawn forward two and to neutral level.

"Is there any particular reason for the question?" Spock asked, not looking at Jim. His gaze was on the board, an eyebrow raised at the move Jim had made.

Jim shrugged. "Just wondering," he said. "Gotta make sure my crew isn't going to kill each other over petty squabbles."

"Your move is illogical," Spock said, and Jim was pretty sure he hadn't heard the answer to his question. "It opens up your Queen."

Jim grinned. "Logical or not, give me six turns and I'll have you mated," he said.

"Doubtful," Spock replied, moving one of his knights.

The move opened the board up just as Jim had hoped it would, and he was about to make his own move, bringing him one step closer to beating Spock, when the Comm. crackled and Lieutenant Uhura's voice came over it, loud and crisp and clear.

"Captain and First Officer to the bridge," she said.

Spock stood and Jim let out a long sigh, gazing forlornly at the board for an extra second before standing as well and falling into step beside Spock on the way to the turbo lift. "I'll get you next time, buddy," Jim said, clapping Spock on the back as they stepped into the lift.

"Bridge," Spock said. He had raised an eyebrow at Jim, but he said nothing about the game.

When the lift door opened onto the bridge, Jim had to hold his breath to keep from letting out a sigh of relief. That ride had felt far longer, and the space more enclosed, than any ride in the turbo lift ever had before. Jim let Spock exit first, watching him take those long, purposeful strides over to his station, then he stepped onto the bridge, looking over at Uhura as he crossed to the center chair.

"What've we got?" he asked, leaning against the arm of the chair and watching Uhura carefully.

She didn't glance at Spock. She turned in her chair and looked Jim in the eye, her head high and her back straight. "We've just had a communiqué from Starfleet Command. Antari VI just contacted them about joining the federation, and we're the closest ship."

Jim nodded. "Riley," he said, turning to the helm. "Set a course for Antari VI, warp three."

"Course set, Captain. Warp three," Riley said, putting on a thick Irish accent. One of the newer additions to his crew, Ensign Riley was a good Helmsman. Not as good as Sulu, and a little obsessed with his Irish heritage, but if Jim could put up with Chekov's attributing everything to Russia, he could put up with Riley doing the same with Ireland.

"Very good." Jim turned back to Uhura. "Have Sulu, Chekov, and Palamas from Anthropology meet Spock and me in the briefing room," he said. Uhura nodded and turned back to her station. Jim looked up at Spock who had already stood and was striding back across the bridge towards the Turbo Lift.

Jim grinned. Like a well oiled machine, he thought, surveying the bridge one more time before following Spock to the lift.