Behind the Wall
Hello! My name is Eren Jeager! I have just started my freshman year at Wall Rose Boys Academy.
DOES MY CUCUMBER DICK LOOK REAL asks Mikasa. Mikasa and me made a cherry blossom moon prism power pact in middle school to go to the same high school together so she is pretending to be a boy. We are in homeroom and I am daydreaming about Senpai and she is waving her cucumber dick in my eyelashes!
NO MIKA...TO I say because I watched Durarara. HEEY GUYS! says Armin the outer moon senshi. He is wearing a girls uniform because Jean-probably-has-a-huge-cock-senpai makes him every morning.
I'D HIT THAT says Pixis-sensei and Armin sheds a tear. Jean says SHUT UP YOU BALD BAKA!
I...
...look at the cherry blossoms outside. Why doesn't Jean care if Pixis hits on ME?!
JEAGER WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING says sensei.
I have left through the window, I am crouching in the cherry blossom. I am the cherry blossom. I see Senpai sitting below me reading dark poetry. His name is Levi and the Sakura is in his undercut. I think he is a hipster.
SO SEXY I wail.
AUUUUUUGGGGUGUGUGUUGUGUUU YEAH
...Something wails back?!
It isn't Senpai. He casually brushes a Sakura petal from his tresses and places it in his mouth, chewing sexily. Over the fence to Wall Rose Boys Academy naked men throw money at me, wailing.
TITANS I crys. The same Titans who my mother, a ho, sold herself to for our rent money...they ate her. Her will alone paid for my entry into the elite Rose Wall Academy. A man whipped out his dong and threw a condom at me.
GON GET YOU SWEET CHEEKS he caressed into the wind to my ear. His thing...was huge.
A Colossal Titan.
JEAGER WHAT THE FUCK GET DOWN FROM THE TREE BRANCH THIS IS THE FIFTH TIME THIS WEEK says a distant voice in my ear ringing like something distant.
On that day, mankind received a grim reminder.
Please review. Constructive criticism welcome. Thanks.