Grown up Christmas list
Disclaimer: I do not own or make any money off this.
December 1st
"Ho ho ho merry Christmas." If Shouta heard Hizashi say that one more time the school might need to look for at least two new teachers.
"Why are you still screaming that nonsense?" Shout bubbled deeper into his scarf. This time of year always brought out the worst in him. The kids had lost their minds. The staff equally so but now expected him to participate in some nonsensical secret Santa and if he didn't he could only anticipate loud music being blasted next to his apartment for the next 5 months.
"Oh come one. Where is your Christmas spirit?"
"I think he left it wrapped up and will open it on Christmas morning." Toshinori had to put his two cents in to this.
"You would participate in this game."
"Of course. What is wrong with spreading a bit of cheer?"
Signing, there was nothing else to be done but reach into the red and white Santa hat to snatch a name.
God help me. As he read the name over and over again, willing it to change. It had to be Toshinori. Of course the fates would conspire to do so.
December 2
"Any plans for the break, Izuku?"
"Just staying with my mother. We really don't have family in the area and traveling at this time of year is hard. But it will be a nice week anyway. How about you, Ochako?"
"Same here. By the way…Kirishima is throwing a Christmas party. Did you want to go?"
Kirishima throwing a party was no surprise. He partied whenever he could for fair or foul. The guy loved games and loved it even more when people were laughing with him. But Christmas parties were different. The booze was different, the games and then there was the mistletoe. Blood rushed to his checks as thought of the potential guest list and who he might get caught under the mistletoe with. Most he could laugh off but if it were Kacchan…
"I don't know."
"Of course you are coming." A bulky arm wrapped around his neck pulling him close to an extremely hard chest. Kirishima smiling the whole time. "It's going to be great. And I plan for the celebrations to go on long after the parties over!"
This couldn't be good. "What do you mean?"
"I heard the staff was doing some kind of secret Santa. I'm not one for copying but…it's a good idea. Don't give me that look. It's a great way for use to bond. What could go wrong?"
December 3
What could go wrong? What was the exact thought Shouta had when his hand went into the hat. But everything had. How the hell could he find a gift for the man who, most likely received every gift under the sun for admirers around the globe. A gift card. That's what he would give him. No one could say anything about that.
"No gift cards!" Except Hizashi. The fucker. And cash most likely was out as well.
December 4
From deep within the confines of Kirishima's apartment, Izuku's nightmare started to spin out of control as they went from one holiday themed game to another. Thankfully, Kirishima had forgotten the mistletoe and he was at least safe from kissing anyone of his friends. At the moment.
"Ok. That name of the game is "Dear Santa". Each of use will pretend to write a letter to Santa and the best one wins!" Holding up a stack of lined paper and a bunch of random pens, most likely stolen from the bank.
"What do we get if we win?"
"Not sure. Probably the left over booze."
"Some prize."
"Please explain exactly how we are supposed to win. The "best letter to Santa is a bit vague since each of us has a different option on what our desires might be."
"Glasses, shut up and lets get this shit over with. I plan to drink myself into a blacking out so I won't remember any of this stupid shit." Katsuki in peak form grabbed the pen and paper. Pen instantly going to work.
"But-"
"Shut up, Deku and do what he says. Problem will ask for All Might shit."
As the half hour ticked away, Izuku stared at the blank lined paper hoping to write something heartfelt (cause everyone would know if it wasn't) but not foolish (cause he had a all too often habit of doing so). What did he want? With The tree twinkling in the background, he knew the truth. Nothing underneath it would be what he wanted. Growing up everyone always asked for the biggest and newest toy. Something shiny to be wrapped under the tree. But even if money had not been an issue in his home, that wasn't his heart's wish.
Let me be a fool. Not like that's anything new. Mind set, his pen went to paper.
The timer when off and Kirishima read the letter. Each one asking for something brand new or for the latest gadget on the market.
"It figures Katsuki would ask for new bike. What's wrong with your old one?"
"Nothing. But this one the gears have a special coating to keep them from sticking."
"True. Not bad. I think Katsuki might be the winner."
"Wait. What about Deku's?" Katsuki's grin was all but merry. There really were times he got off on humiliating the boy. And today was no different.
"Right, I forgot. Ok, let me see." Grabbing the paper out of Izuku's hands. Red eyes looked over it. A pause as he looked to the paper and back at his friend. "Uh, Izuku, I think you need to do this over. Did you not know what to do?"
"No, I did."
"Let me see this…" Kaskui snatching the paper. His voice clear as a bell as he read for the whole group to hear.
"Dear Santa,
Every year people ask what they want you to bring them but the truth is, if I had been asked this maybe 10 years ago, I'd say something like a toy. But I'm not a little kid and what I want might be too big for you to deliver. I know it won't fit in your sleigh and it might seem a bit silly but this is something I've been dreaming about for as long as I can remember.
Everyday I see people hurting, thinking it will never change. Their homes torn apart by war or they must face each day knowing there will be pain and suffering. If you can do anything, please let time heal their hearts. Let them know there is someone who cares for them and that even if their lives are all falling apart, things will get better.
So, that is my wish. Not for me but for everyone in need. Please, if you are out there, show me.
Love,
Izuku"
The only sound was the white noise from the Christmas tree as the electricity rushed to the blinking blubs. Even Katsuki was having trouble find a quip or put down.
"Is…this really want you want, Izuku?" Shouto's hand rested on his should more for his own support than Izuku's.
"It's hard having hope and sometimes, you are convinced the pain will never go away and sometimes, it doesn't. The hurt can be so deep that nothing can ever heal it." He hadn't meant to kill the mood. But they wanted honestly. "Hey, don't look at me like that! I mean isn't that what we all really want deep inside? To make the world a better place. Come on, we're super heroes in training. I just…you know…wrote it down. Anyway, let's give Kacchan the liquor and move on to the secret Santa!" Even if his smile did reach his eyes, it was more fake than Santas at the malls and just as haunting.
Katsuki had forgotten how hard the holidays were for him. While most people had all their friends and family around, Deku only had his mother and partially thanks to him for scaring away any potential friends. But even now as he was surrounded by love, the pain and loneliness still dwells. As the hat was passed around, it seemed the like he was being visited by the three ghosts of Christmas. Visions of his youth playing with Deku slowly morphed showing the bully had become which bled into him standing on top of a roof, Deku at the edge. Katsuki's legs going as fast as they could but not able to reach him in time as he plummets to his death. I really need another drink. As he reached inside, the clinching of shackles echoed in his mind only to stop when he read the name …Izuku…
December 5
Shouta gripped Hizashi's arm as his friend tried to make his escape. "I want to change the person!" He voice grumbled as he tried to contain his rage. "Or at the very least let me get a fucking gift card."
"Dude, that's not how this works. The point of the secret Santa is not to just give and get gifts but to get to know each other. I mean who could you have possibly gotten that it could be so bad?"
Tired eyes narrowed conveying more than words ever could. "Oh…" The silent shattered to the all too familiar sound of a way too cheerful voice. "But! What's done is done. If you are not sure what to get Toshinori, why don't stalk, I mean hang out with him. Then you can get some ideas."
"I hate you."
December 6
"So, please explain why you are following me around? Not that I don't enjoy your company?" Toshinori swerved in and out of the crowd of people with Shouta not far behind.
Toshinori being the gullible and trusting type would believe anything anyone told him. Or at least a trusted co-worker. "I'm trying to find a gift from Hizashi. And I need help."
"But I picked Hizashi from the Secret Santa. Why are you shopping for him?"
Crap! "I always get him something."
"That's wonderful! Then you can help me. I've been thinking over and over what I could get him but nothing seems right," A large hand grabbed his side as he hunched over panting.
"Are you alright?" He hadn't thought a brisk walk in the mall would over exert the top super hero. But at least he wasn't coughing up blood yet.
"Yes. I just need to rest. Why don't we get a drink?"
Thankfully, even though the mall's food court was packed, they were able to find a table. "It's a Christmas miracle!" He laughed sitting down enjoying how the pain in his feet along with his side seemed to ebb.
As Toshinori tried to recuperate, Shouta's mind once again went back to his own gift dilemma. What could he get the man sitting across from him? What could he possibly want or need? He wasn't cruel enough to buy a cane as a joke but what could he get him.
"Shouta?"
"Um?"
"I know this wasn't planned but I thank you for coming out with me. It gets a little lonely doing everything by yourself."
"I find it hard to believe you are lonely. How can you be lonely when everyone around the globe is looking after you?"
"Really? You think everyone. Do you think they would like me if they really knew I was this." Motioning to his skeleton like form. "Is all that I am. All that I will be. When the world finds out, there will be no one thinking of me as a great hero. Only a fraud. Even still when I am in that form, I'm still alone. I can be standing in a room full of people and still feel like I am the only one there. It's a lonely career that I choose and no one seems to get it. Everyone always 'oh you're so famous.' but that comes with a price."
"But in a sense, they might never find out. And you still have the other superheroes."
"Still, at this time of year, I wonder what my life would have been had I chosen differently. In our line of work, we are condemned to loneliness. Our only companions are each other and if we choose not to seek them out, then what do we have? You might think this whole secret Santa thing is a bunch of crap but he gets it. He sees the loneliness and wants to help. Can you blame Hizashi, really? People all around him saddened by this invisible burden? Honestly. How many of us do you think will find love and get married? Have a family or even grow old? I don't. But I still dream about it."
Even after years of knowing Toshinori, Shouta still forgot the man was mortal not the figure flashed up on the big screens. A person who could be broken and bleed. Now his heart was just like the rest of him body.
This fic is such a rush job but yesterday at work I hear "Where are you Christmas?" and images started to fly into my head. Bringing me to this. Each chapter will have a song attached to it. The first song is "Grown up Christmas List". Next will be "Believe" and finally, "Where are you Christmas?"
"My Grown Up Christmas List"
Do you remember me?
I sat upon your knee
I wrote to you
With childhood fantasies
Well, I'm all grown up now
And still need help somehow
I'm not a child
But my heart still can dream
So here's my lifelong wish
My grown up christmas list
Not for myself
But for a world in need
No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end
This is my grown up christmas list
As children we believed
The grandest sight to see
Was something lovely
Wrapped beneath our tree
But heaven only knows
That packages and bows
Can never heal
A hurting human soul
No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end
This is my grown up christmas list
What is this illusion called the innocence of youth
Maybe only in our blind belief can we ever find the truth
No more lives torn apart
That wars would never start
And time would heal all hearts
And everyone would have a friend
And right would always win
And love would never end, oh
This is my grown up christmas list
This is my only life long wish
This is my grown up christmas list