As Clark sat on the couch in his loft he wondered about the man he should become. Reading the birthday card from his father had been like him coming back from the dead. Which he had done to some extent.
God he felt so embarrassed when Lana found him in her room. Understandably she thought he was being a jealous ex-boyfriend. But of course she hadn't listened. Why did she always have to think the worst of him?
"I thought you would be outside Lana's room with your binoculars by now" Lois said. He hadn't needed his superhearing to hear her trudging up the stairs.
Clark looked up from the card. His face serious for a moment before smirking.
"You know I was actually there to help save Lex's life. A true stalker ex boyfriend would just let him die, don't you think?" Clark said standing up.
"As if you would ever let somebody die, Mr and Mrs K raised you better."
"I know"
"Look Smallville Lana's going to move on..."
Clark grunted "She already has..with Lex"
Lois sighed "And it sucks, but you gotta trust that you broke up for a reason"
"Lois I don't need the whole intervention speech" Clark looked at her in annoyance
"Well I think you do"
"I know exactly why I ended things and they aren't going to change. I want Lana to be happy, to find somebody else, but Lex my former best friend. I mean come on, that's just wrong"
"I know the guy she's picked isn't the best guy..."
"Lois she couldn't have picked worse if she tried"
Lois giggled and Clark smiled too. She rarely got to see this down to earth Clark. It was nice, he was actually quite funny. When he wanted to be.
"So why did you break up?" Lois asked
"I...Are you sure you want to hear all this"
"As long as there's no freaky bedroom stuff" Clark turned red
"No, I... on the day my Dad died" Lois leaned forward still perched on the edge of the couch arm."Basically she came to me and said she wanted a break, then my dad had his heart attack"
"Clark.. I'm sorry"
"Yeah well there's a difference between suspecting and knowing that the person is staying with you out of pity" Clark let out a bark like laugh "It's not like it's unexpected, we had been growing apart for weeks then the month after that was some how even worse with my dad an all. Then I guess I used that mind control girl as an excuse to end it."
"I'm proud of you Clark" said Lois without the usual snark (or Lois filter) as he liked to call it.
"Now there's something I never expected to hear from you" Clark laughed
Lois looked a little embarrassed.
This thread of conversation had finished and both pairs of eyes found themselves on his fathers birthday card.
"I've been thinking a lot about him lately."
Lois nodded "I think about my Mom sometimes too"
"Do you ever think you won't measure up to their expectations"
"All the time Clark, every kid does"
"My Dad always wanted me to take over the farm, keep it in the family...I'm not sure what he expected, marry a city girl and convert her into a country mouse"
Lois laughed
"I guess he wanted me to have a quiet life, but I'm don't think that's what I want"
"Clark your pretty much the model son, and Mr K wasn't the type of father to force you to do anything"
"I know that, I just want to do something that I'm not sure he would approve of."
"What?"
"Ever since he died, I keep thinking about what I'm going to do, just stay here or do something that will affect people"
"What are you thinking about, Army? Police?"
"I want to be the person my dad would be proud of so I was thinking journalist"
"Aww you just want to be close to Chloe" Lois giggled ruffling his hair
"I'd stop that Lois you forget Chloe told me your ticklish" Lois stopped but her eyes looked like they were just daring him to try it.
"Seriously Clark, just do what you want to do, your parents will always be proud of you, and well I'm proud of you"
"What not the shy teenage you first met?"
"No..your maturing that's all" Lois' eyes did an unconcious once over of Clark. And he bless him saw but didn't get the meaning. Still Lois chastised herself. The one time Clark shows some level of growing up and she was practically drooling.
"Glad you approve" Lois' eyes went wide in shock thinking he had read her mind but he had stood up.
"Thanks Lois, I needed that..and thanks for my diary. You know sometimes I think you don't know me at all, Yet there are other times that I think you know me better than anyone. "
Lois blushed "Yeah well that's what I'm here for Smallville, one save at a time"