i'm (not) still the same me I was yesterday, a katekyo hitman reborn! fanfic

Notes: This is kind of a sequel to "your unselfish heart", so I'd recommend reading that first. Things might not make sense otherwise. :D

Ryohei is pissed. Sure, okay, he'll be the first one to admit that his temper's not the best, and there's a certain octopus-head and a Japanophile who can rile him up like no other. But this isn't something he can take a swing at and then laugh off later.

His fist makes contact with the center of the punching bag, causing it to fly back and then surge forward only to collide with his other fist. Rinse and repeat. Music blasts loudly in ears, the kind that usually gets him pumped up before a fight but only serves to block out the world around him tonight.

He's never been one to hold back, always attacking with his full strength, regardless of the opponent. And he did this time, too, but... He frowns severely, picking up pace until his punches are just a blur.

He had been okay with Tsuna asking out his little sister - not exactly thrilled but okay - because it's Tsuna. Always putting his friends and family first, wouldn't hurt a fly without good cause, kind and caring Tsuna. And Kyoko had wanted it, too, of course - had even come to him beforehand and asked permission, of all things.

They'd been good together - even Ryohei, biased older brother that he was, could see that. Kyoko had practically glowed those first few months, and Tsuna hadn't seemed to be able to stop smiling. Then they'd all grown up, graduated from high school, and finally moved to Vongola HQ in Italy.

Ryohei hadn't ever imagined he'd be anything other than a professional boxer, but he's found his place in the mafia (although after Tsuna's reform, it can hardly be called that anymore) with his friends and his sister and wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

He's mellowed out, some, isn't as prone to arguments and actually listens to people, even if what they have to say isn't all that interesting. "Social cues", his sister calls them. Necessary for keeping up appearances around mafia bigwigs. That is, until one of those slimy politicians' subtle jabs finally snaps someone's (usually Hayato's) patience, and all hell breaks loose.

The others have changed, too, but they've remained the same in all the ways that matter.

Kyouya doesn't shut everyone out quite so much, and he'll even join in on celebrations, as long as they don't last too long and aren't packed with 'herbivores.' He has a tendency to fly back to Namimori without a word and sequester himself in the peace and quiet of their hometown, but he always comes back, usually with information no one else had been able to get their hands on.

Hayato isn't so insecure about his position as Tsuna's right hand. Although he still argues with Takeshi over every little thing, there's never any real heat behind his barbs, and he's shaped up to be a capable strategist, able to take over if Tsuna is ever away or out of commission. He's stopped smoking, mostly because Tsuna had a very serious conversation with him about his future and whether his promise to stay by Tsuna's side even ten years later has any truth to it. He keeps a pack of gum in his front pocket and has learned to light his dynamite with his flames.

Mukuro still threatens to possess Tsuna from time to time, but none of them really take it seriously anymore. Tsuna usually just smiles fondly at him and tells him to go ahead and try. Ryohei knows that Mukuro is grateful Tsuna kept his promise and got him out of Vindice - and that he is changing Vongola for the better, returning it to its vigilante routes. He and Kyouya bicker whenever they're within ten feet of each other, so Tsuna makes sure their paths rarely cross, at least not while on business. Unless that business involves total destruction and mayhem.

Chrome has grown into herself, mentally and physically. Her illusions are on par with Mukuro's, and she's taken to solo missions as of late - probably to prove to herself that she's strong in her own right. The rest of the guardians already know as much. Kyoko and Haru drop by and take her out for some "girl fun" every few weeks, and she always returns with new clothes and a pleased smile. Gone are the days she shied away from anyone and everyone. She is wary around strangers (as she should be in their line of work), but she's no longer scared. She's a force to be reckoned with.

Takeshi is willing to drop the happy, carefree persona of his around them, but only when it actually is a persona. Their rain guardian is naturally optimistic and prone to laughter, and his presence really is calming. And it's rarely an act. He is the first to greet their allies, usually with a welcoming smile, and he is sent on more diplomatic missions than any of them. His blade is as deadly as ever, though, and his assassination missions are equally high in number.

Lambo is still a teenager, with all of the mood swings and drama it entails. He is spoiled by both Tsuna and the girls, and his mishaps with the Ten Year Bazooka occur on occasion. There's always some variation of the cow kid running around HQ, whether he's five years old or twenty-five. Ryohei has gotten better at cheering the kid up from his crying spells, a far cry from his dismal attempts in middle school. He's also being taught how to fight by all of them, so his style is unorthodox but definitely unpredictable.

And lastly, their boss, who has always been dependable and has always gone against his own wishes of normalcy to protect them, has changed both the most and the least. He doesn't take any flack from Reborn (not when it matters anyway) or anyone else, and he doggedly reforms Vongola - and subsequently the mafia as a whole - to his own image, regardless of its bloody history or protests from the Ninth and his advisors. His very presence commands respect and obedience, but he's still the kind and compassionate kid he was when Ryohei first met him.

The song ends with little fanfare, and the other begins immediately. The angry vocals echo his own mixed emotions, and he puts a little more strength behind his strikes.

Tsuna's a good guy. Ryohei wouldn't have dropped everything - his dreams, his life, his future - to follow him, otherwise. He's a good guy, but-

Kyoko's tear-streaked face flashes before his mind's eye, its accompanying memory playing out like a film reel, unbidden.

"We broke up, Nii-san," she tells him. "It was mutual. We just weren't- we didn't click, that's all." She wipes ineffectually at her eyes. "I love him, I do, but it's like- like a brother or a friend. Not like, like a boyfriend or-or a husband."

He wraps her up in his arms, and she presses her face against his chest, sobbing inconsolably now. Ryohei rubs her back and runs a hand through her long hair, like he's always done when she was upset.

As she breaks down, he sees only red.

"Don't you ever do anything to hurt her," he'd cautioned, without an ounce of his usual playfulness.

Tsuna's eyes had glowed orange as he'd promised, "I would never."

He'd promised.

Kyoko eventually calms down, but emotionally exhausted, she decides to take a nap. Ryohei tucks her into his bed, waits until she falls asleep, and then he practically marches down to Tsuna's office.

He looks resigned when Ryohei steps into the room unannounced, and somehow that pisses him off even more. He stands up and moves around his desk, and that's as far as he gets before Ryohei decks him.

He recovers quickly but doesn't retaliate (he never does), and for once, Ryohei wishes he would.

"Ryohei," Tsuna begins, quietly, calmly, heedless of the blossoming bruise on his right cheek. "I - we - didn't make this decision lightly. We discussed it with each other and mutually agree-"

"You promised," he interrupts, equally as quiet. "You promised me."

He doesn't know why that in particular is fueling his anger, more than Kyoko's sobs even, but he knows it's important.

"I promised," Tsuna acknowledges. "I had and still have no intention of hurting Kyoko."

"But you did."

"Unintentionally," he corrects gently. "Neither of us were happy with our relationship, Ryohei. It might have been even worse had we gone on pretending everything was okay." His smile takes on a bitter, helpless edge. "I couldn't do that to her."

He grits his teeth, torn between wanting to punch that stupid sad expression off of his face and wanting to comfort him the way he had Kyoko - because, loathe as he is to admit it, they're clearly both hurting.

He does neither. He stalks out of that stuffy room and all the way down to the training floor, passing various employees along the way, all of whom scurry out of his path.

He's been here for hours already, trying to work through his fury, but the same arguments keep running through his head, igniting his rage all over again.

Kyoko cried herself to sleep.