What Big Brother Doesn't Know

by AndAllThatGoodStuff

He doesn't know what he was thinking. He had known Logan since he was still in diapers. He watched him grow up. He babysat him for crying out loud! What on Earth possessed Kendall to kiss his best friend's little brother? KOGAN AU

"I'm really sorry about this, Kendall."

"James, would you quit apologizing?" Kendall chuckled as the pair entered the Knight residence. He shook the snow from his hair and coat as they removed the layers of clothing they have to bulk on for the cold Minnesota climate. "I already told you it's okay."

"I just hate that the one Knight you don't have to watch Katie, I get stuck with Logan." James grimaced.

"I can hear you, you know." As if on cue, James' little brother, Logan, entered the home. He glared at the two older boys as he removed his own coat, scarf, and boots. "And I don't think I didn't notice you walking faster and trying to ditch me."

Kendall laughed as he went to the closet to hang up the three coats. James rolled his eyes, half cursing his brother's speed. "Whatever. Can't you take a hint? Me and Kendall-"

"Kendall and I..." Logan spoke up.

"Kendall and you what?"

The short brunet opened his mouth to once again correct his brother, but promptly closed it, deciding it was useless. The only thing that got through that thick head was 'Cuda. "Nothing."

"Anyway," James continued on. "We don't want to spend our Friday night with some kid."

"I get it. Two guys your age would probably want to spend a Friday night with their girlfriends." The younger boy looked thoughtful for a moment. "But wait...you guys don't have girlfriends." Logan laughed at the identical glares the teens were sending him. "And like I'd want to spend my evening with you two." He continued with a scoff. "And I'm not a kid! I'm twelve."

"And we're sixteen. That makes you a kid." James responded smugly. Logan crossed his arms, glare still directed at his brother. "Why don't you go in the living room and color or something? And don't bother me and Kendall."

"Kendall and I!" Logan instinctively corrected again.

"What are you talking about?" James screeched.

Logan threw his hands up in exasperation, once again dismissing the brunet and his lack of grammar knowledge. He chose instead to stomp toward the living room, muttering something about James being an idiot under his breath. Kendall's brow quirked with concern as the younger boy dropped onto the couch and turned on the TV.

"Come on, Kendall." James nudged the blond, heading for the stairs.

Kendall shot one more glance at the boy on the couch before following James to his room.

…

"You don't think that, maybe, you were a little too harsh with Logan?" Kendall asked a few minutes into their video game.

"What?" James casted a confused glance in his friend's direction before bringing his gaze back to the screen in front of him. "No. You saw him. He's a total brat." The pretty boy glared slightly at the TV.

Kendall sighed, deciding not to point out who was actually being the brat earlier and refocused on the game. They were once again interrupted by the sound of James' phone going off. The brunet pulled the device from his pocket, his whole face lit up at the name on the screen. "It's Cindy from homeroom! Shh!" Kendall pulled a face because James was the only one talking. The pretty boy took a moment to collect himself, doing that weird jazz hand thing over his face before answering. "Hey, Cindy." He greeted in a smooth, flirty tone that Kendall rolled his eyes at.

"I'm gonna get a soda." Kendall announced, standing to his feet. James waved him away continuing to talk in that ridiculous voice. The blond walked downstairs, glancing at Logan who hadn't moved from where the two boys had left him. He continued watching the pre-teen as he walked into the kitchen, grabbing two sodas, and made his way back to the living room. "Hey," Kendall called to get the boy's attention. Logan looked up, brow raising in confusion. "Want one?" The teen waved the soda in his hand.

Logan eyed the drink. "What did you do to it?" He looked up at the older boy with a glare.

"Nothing!" Kendall laughed at the pale boy's paranoia. "Just thought you'd be a little thirsty, that's all." He said handing him the drink.

Logan continued to look at the can. Kendall watched curiously, waiting for him to do or say something. "Soda isn't actually a thirst quencher. Carbonated beverages are diuretic; so they take more water from your body than they put in."

Kendall blinked, only understanding half of what came from Logan's mouth, but he didn't have to know what he said to be impressed. "You're pretty smart, huh?" He smiled at the brunet as he sat on the arm of the couch.

Surprise briefly flashed across the genius' features as if he had expected Kendall to make fun of him or something. James always did and this was James' best friend. When no harsh words came, Kendall only continued to smile at him, the brunet began to stutter. "I, uh...I-I guess so." He blushed slightly, directing his gaze back to the can of soda in his lap.

Kendall continued to smile, taking a sip of his soda. "And I'm sorry about what James said." He said, feeling a twinge of guilt for not standing up for the younger boy earlier. His mom had raised him better than that. "I don't mind having you here. Really." He smiled reassuringly. "I bet you're a pretty cool kid." He gave the small brunet a friendly pat on the arm.

"You'd lose that bet." Logan mumbled, causing Kendall's smile to fall.

Before he could voice a question James came pounding down the stairs, wearing a huge grin. "Guess who has a date with Cindy tomorrow night." He pointed to himself with a cocky smirk and a hair flip. "Me-that's who."

Logan rolled his eyes with disinterest and Kendall only gave a small smile in response, his mind still on what Logan said. The pre-teen sounded so lonely, like he didn't have any friends at all. Then to have his own brother tell him he didn't want to hang out with him...

Kendall shook his head. If he didn't feel guilty before, he really felt guilty now. "Anyway, let's get back to the game." James patted Kendall's shoulder to nudge him up after he had finished his rant about Cindy. Kendall came out of his thoughts, only nodding for he barely heard what James had said.

When he stood to follow James, the tall boy stopped, and turned around again. "You okay, man? You seem out of it."

"Hm?" Kendall looked up, expression slightly dazed making James' eyebrow arch upward. "Yeah, I'm fine." He said with a shrug, but James saw right through it.

"You didn't bother him, did you?" The pretty boy shot a glare in his little brother's direction.

"James, he's fine. Let's go back upstairs." Kendall was doing the nudging this time, pushing James up the stairs. "You wanna join us, Logie?" He turned to the brunet again with a sincere smile.

Logan was once again surprised. Not only had Kendall defended him but he was now inviting him to hang out with him. "N-no, I'm fine. Thanks." He smiled back at the blond.

"Come on, it'll be fun." Kendall continued to prod. "You can be on my team and we can beat James' pants off."

Logan could feel his face heating up again as he nodded and followed Kendall to his room.

…

"Aw, man. Where is it?" James groaned, throwing his clothes and other items all over his room.

Kendall, upon hearing the chaos going on down the hall, went to investigate. The noise grew louder as he approached his room mate's room. There were clothes still flying everywhere- some even out the door and almost hitting Kendall. The blond thanked God for hockey giving him fast reflexes, able to dodge his friend's underwear when he saw them coming.

"James!" Kendall yelled, trying to get the pretty boy's attention but James continued his frantic activities. "James!" He tried again, taking cautious steps into the tall boy's room. "James, what are you doing?" He finally caught James' attention but the brunet didn't slow his efforts.

"I can't find my phone." He said quickly. "It keeps ringing, but I never find it in time. What if it's Carlos trying to find out why I'm late for our date?" He asked in his higher pitched panic-y tone. "He's gonna think I ditched him."

When the ring tone went off again, James let out an almost girlish scream as he continued to turn his room upside down looking for the device. Kendall watched with slight amusement as his friend scrambled under his bed when all he did was reach over to his dresser where the phone laid and flip it open. "Found it." He announced with a smirk, reading over the text message.

James' head popped up from under the bed, hair uncharacteristically mused and frazzled. "Is it Carlos?" He asked worriedly. "Does he think I ditched him? Is it a break up text? What?" James ran over to his blond friend struggling to see the phone too.

"Calm down; it's not Carlos." James breathed a sigh of relief but Kendall's brow furrowed with confusion. "It's Logan." The brunet mirrored his friend's confused expression, muttering the name to himself as if it would ring any bells as to why his little brother was texting him. "He says his plane landed half an hour ago and he's been waiting for you." Kendall's eyes narrowed further as he grew more inquisitive. "I didn't know Logan was coming to town."

James' eyes suddenly widened as if he had been slapped in the face. "Didn't I...tell you that...?" He laughed nervously, taking his phone from the blond quickly.

"No..." Kendall watched with suspiciously narrowed eyes as James tapped away on his phone. "You forgot, didn't you?" He asked, crossing his arms over his chest in an accusing manner.

The tall boy made a 'pfft' noise in response, smiling in what he hoped was innocence at his friend. "No." He laughed at the accusation. When Kendall continued to glare at him in that way that only the spawn of Jennifer Knight could, he broke. "Okay, yes." He confessed.

"James!" Kendall started to scold.

"Don't yell at me! It is not my fault." James tried to defend himself.

Kendall's glare was back.

"It was Carlos. I've been trying to get a date with him forever and when I found out he was giving me a chance...I couldn't think about anything else!" Kendall continued to scowl, showing he felt absolutely no sympathy towards the pretty boy's story. "And now I can't stand Carlos up. I can't. Who knows when he'll give me another shot? So, if you could do me a favor..."

"No." Kendall said immediately, turning on his heel and leaving the room.

James' jaw fell, following his shorter friend into their living room where he fell on the couch and continued watching the hockey game that was interrupted by the brunet's antics. "You don't even know what I'm going to ask."

"You're going to ask me to go pick up Logan, like you were supposed to, while you go on your date."

James' eyes shifted for he had been caught, then smiled hopefully at the blond. "No!" Kendall repeated.

"Kendall!" James whined. "Please, I promise you can give me the 'you're the worst big brother ever!' speech, but later. Please do this for me. Please?" The pretty boy poked out his bottom lip and cupped his hands in front of himself in a pleading manner.

Kendall sighed, feeling his defense crumbling but still wanting to be strong. "I don't know..."

"Come on, Kendall. He likes you better anyway." The pretty boy continued to pout.

The hockey player, rolled his eyes, trying to ignore the annoyance he felt from James not even caring that his little brother preferred the company of his best friend than himself. But that really annoyed him. "Fine, but have you ever stopped to think that maybe Logan likes me more because I actually nice to him?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Lecture later. You should go get Logan; you're late!" The brunet called over his shoulder as he gathered his things and ran out the door.

"You're getting that lecture!" Kendall yelled just as the door shut. When all he heard was a muffled 'thanks' through the door, he let his head fall to the back of the couch with a groan, before gathering his keys and heading out the door himself.

...

Kendall stood in the airport, feeling like an idiot as he held a sign with Logan's name on it. He checked his watch, sighing heavily as another minute went by and Logan didn't show. "Kendall?" The blond turned around, jaw falling at the sight of the short brunet approaching him.

Logan had gotten taller since he had last seen him. His shaggy dark locks were now cut short and spiked into a faux hawk. When the short boy ran up and hugged him, he could tell that genius' previously scrawny physique had been replaced with more meat and muscle. "It's been so long." Logan grinned up at him.

"Yeah...it has." Kendall said quietly, not quite believing that this was the same little Logie he had left in Minnesota four years ago when he graduated and packed up his stuff to move to California with James. "You look..."

Logan raised his brow when Kendall paused, searching for the right word to describe this change. "...Older?" The brunet attempted to provide an adjective for him.

"Yeah." Kendall laughed, rubbing the back of his head. "Are you ready to go?"

Logan nodded, picking up his bags and following Kendall out to his car. "So where's James?" The pale boy questioned as Kendall took his bags from him, dropping them in the trunk of his car.

"Uh...James got tied up with a prior engagement, but he's really sorry he couldn't make it." The blond pulled the excuse straight out of his butt.

"Oh," Logan nodded. "He had a date didn't he?"

Kendall looked up, looking surprised. He had forgotten that the boy in front of him was practically a genius. "Yeah," He admitted with a sigh. "but he really is sorry."

"Uh huh." Logan dropped his last bag in the trunk, stomping to the front of the car and climbing into the passenger seat.

Kendall sighed, slightly hating James for putting him in this situation and half hoping his date sucks. "Alright," The blond huffed, shutting the trunk and hopping into the front seat. "Where are you headed, Logan?"

"I don't know." The younger boy shrugged. "James was supposed to take care of all of that. But I assume he forgot about me..."

"No, no, no." Kendall was racking his brain again. "James didn't forget. I forgot. He wanted you to stay at our place with us." He smirked as an idea formed in his head. "In fact, he said you could have his room. He'll take the couch."

"Hm..." Logan hummed in thought the sound drowned out by the rumble of Kendall's car starting. "That was uncharacteristically kind of my brother." He pointed out.

"James is fully of surprises."

"Why do you insist on sticking up for him?" Logan sighed.

"Because I'm his best friend." Kendall said gently, easing into the LA mid-morning airport traffic. "And you're his brother. I know James doesn't have the best attitude about everything," He ignored the bitter chuckle that Logan let out and continued. "but if we can't find the good in James, then who will?"

The pale boy looked to the older boy with disbelief. "James has good in him?"

"Yes!"

Logan shrugged. "I guess. You know him better than I do." He mumbled.

Kendall sighed heavily, that feeling of annoyance returning once again. "You don't think it's a little weird that I know James better than you do?" He glanced at Logan to gauge the smart boy's reaction.

"No, you're his best friend."

"But you're his brother. That doesn't bother you...even a little?" Kendall continued, trying to get some sort of reaction from the brunet.

"Not at all." Logan turned to face the blond with a glare. "And if you're going to spend the entire summer trying to get me and James closer together, then you can forget it." He turned back in his seat, crossing his arms and glaring out the window. "That's not why I agreed to come here."

"Then why did you come?" If he wasn't here for James then what other reasons would he have to come? Last he heard, Logan wanted to be a doctor and had already been accepted to dozens of schools. What was for him in LA other than his brother?

"To get my mom to stop bugging me about it, and I figured I'd just hang out with you...if that's okay?"

Kendall's heart broke a little at the question. Passed the physical changes, Logan was obviously still the shy little middle school kid who was insecure about being wanted.

James and Kendall had both been kids of families that a deadbeat dad walked out on (though James had gone through it twice). It's why they were such good friends; they came from similar backgrounds. He remembers Katie going through the same fears as Logan when they were younger after their own father left. She was too young to understand that their parents' marriage breaking up was not her fault and instead thought that her father left because he didn't want her.

As they got older, Kendall was there for her and able to explain to her that it wasn't her fault. Because of this Katie grew out of the apprehensive behavior. It was clear that Logan did not.

"Of course we can hang out, but...wouldn't you'd rather hang out with James?"

"No. I told you I have no interest in James." The brunet replied stubbornly.

Kendall sighed once again.

Why did the two brothers have to be so stubborn?

…

"Here it is!" Kendall announced as he ushered the younger boy into the apartment. "Your new home for the next...how long are you staying?"

"Two and a half months."

"Two and a half months!" Kendall faked glee as he said this. "Yay..." He whimpered slightly, already hearing the siblings' petty arguments in his head. He made sure to put aspirin on the grocery list as he walked by the kitchen. "And your new room is the first door on the left down that hallway right there." The hockey player pointed in the direction of James' bedroom. When the short boy didn't respond, he looked up to see Logan too engrossed with studying the apartment. He watched Logan walked around for a while, taking in the pictures on the walls and the furniture. "What do you think?" Kendall asked after a second of silence, making the short boy jump slightly.

"It's nice." He shrugged. "It doesn't really look like you though."

"That's because it's not." Kendall chuckled. "When it came to decorating anything outside my bedroom, James just told me to stay out of his way."

Logan laughed to himself. Kendall thought he heard him mumble something about 'classic James' but ignored it. "You didn't mind James taking over like that? I mean, it's your apartment too."

The blond shrugged. "It's just my first apartment. I'm eventually gonna move out. Maybe head to New York and play for the Sabres." He said with a thoughtful smile.

Logan grinned as well. "That sounds awesome."

"Yeah, you and James could come visit me." He offered with a hopeful smile.

He was slightly disappointed when Logan turned his head downward, hiding his expression from the older boy. Suddenly the door opened and James walked in, then there was silence. The air was thick with tension and swirling with all kinds of emotions, making this possibly the most uncomfortable the three men had ever felt. Kendall stood awkwardly in the kitchen as two brothers stared the other down.

"Logan," James broke out in a smile, looking overly excited. Kendall couldn't tell if he was actually happy to see Logan, or if he was just trying to cover up his jackass move with a little phony compassion. He was hoping for the former. "How have you been?"

Logan crossed his arms, glaring at his older brother. "Do you care?"

The pretty boy began to sputter, looking offended at his brother's question. Logan rolled his eyes at the behavior. "What?" He placed his hand over his heart, making the most ridiculous cry face Kendall had ever seen. "That hurts, Logan." James said softly.

The genius' eyes narrowed further, not even bothering to dignify the display with a response. "I'm gonna go lie down." He picked up his bag, heading to James' bedroom.

"Okay!" James' large smile was back. "You rest up buddy because the next..." He looked to Kendall.

"Two and a half months."

"Two and a half months?" The tall boy cleared his throat and continued on, voice slightly higher pitched like when he was panicking. "It's gonna be great!" When the sound of the door shutting was heard down the hall, James turned to Kendall. "Two and a half months?" He repeated, expression now showing how much he dreaded the situation. "Why for so long?"

"He's here for the summer." Kendall explained. "Your mom wants the two of you to bond but unfortunately he grew up to be just as stubborn as you."

James shot a glare at the blond. "I'm not gonna comment on that." Kendall rolled his eyes. "But you're gonna help me keep him busy, right?" James was pulling that stupid pouty face again.

Kendall sighed. "Yes," James did a rejoiceful fist pump followed by a short lived happy dance. "But that doesn't mean I'm going to spend the entire summer with him. You're not going to dump him on me...again!"

"When have I ever dumped Logan on you?"

"Every time you had to stay home with him, you would call me over and then run off on a date!" James' face twisted as he tried to think of a time that didn't occur, but Kendall continued. "I'm serious, James. I'm not Logan's brother-you are, and if you're not careful, you're gonna lose him." He warned. "Do you really want to lose him James?"

Kendall found comfort in seeing James' face soften, sighing sadly. "Of course not. He's my baby brother and I care about him."

"Then tell him that!"

"How can I? We've never gotten along and we don't have anything in common."

"How do you know? Have you ever actually tried to get to know him?"

"...No." The tall boy answered meekly.

What was previously annoyance was now replaced with a feeling of sorrow towards the two brothers. "You two should fix that." He suggested.

"How do I do that?" James asked desperately.

"Geez, James, do I have to come up with everything?" When James only continued to look at him pleadingly, he groaned. "Taking him out for the day. Have lunch with him, see a movie or something." He provided.

"Right!" James turned to go to his room.

"But James!" The brunet stopped. "This isn't about you. Do something he would like."

"Right." James turned to run off again but made a u-turn back to Kendall. "What does he like exactly?"

"James!" The hockey player glared.

"Give me something."

Kendall groaned, rubbing his face in frustration. It was sad how little James knew about Logan...and it kind of worried him how much he knew. After years of James dumping the younger boy off on him, he had picked up a thing or two (more like everything) about him-from his favorite food to which comic he preferred: DC or Marble? He knew all his likes, dislikes, and all of what he called bad habits. The blond wondered if James knew any of that. "Books." He spat out.

"Books?"

"Yeah, Logie loves to read. He's read the entire Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings series twenty times, cover to cover. He loves them both but he likes Harry Potter just a little bit better."

Kendall watched the brunet's eyebrows come together, one slightly quirking in an unreadable expression before he turned around to go find Logan.

…

Logan put down his medical book when he heard a series of knocks at the door. "Logan, can I come in?" He heard his brother ask from outside the door.

Logan rolled his eyes at the question James always asked just before he came in. No matter what answer he received in response, he would come in anyway. Whether he does it because he's rude or he does it because he thinks that just asking was courteous enough was something that a person as analytical as Logan has never been able to figure out. "If I say no, will you come in anyway?" He asked.

"Duh." James said as he entered the room with a shrug.

Logan glared at the brunet, though he couldn't say anything. It was James' room after all. "What do you want?" He mumbled curtly, raising his book back to his eyes to read.

"The question is, little brother, what do you want?" James grinned.

"What are you talking about now?" Logan's eyes never left the book.

It almost seemed like he wasn't interested in what James had to say to him. Something the tall brunet found absolutely ridiculous. "I'm talking about you spending the entire day with me, your awesome big brother, James." James wiggled his fingers over his face and then held out his arms as if presenting a prize...because in his mind he was.

Logan finally looked up, taking a good look at the older boy. "No thanks." He said turning back to his reading.

James' smile fell. This is the second person to ever turn down a chance to hang out with him. That first person was Carlos, and after a year of asking him and totally not begging-James Diamond didn't beg-he finally got a date. If he could do that, he could do this. He was James. He was the face. He could do anything.

Except math.

"But it'll be fun. You like reading, right?" Logan's eyes peaked over the top of the book at James. "I'm sure there's a book store or...library around here...somewhere." James trailed off with a shift of his eyes.

Logan continued to eye the taller skeptically. "Did Kendall put you up to this?"

"No! No, I really want to get to know you better. We are brothers after all." James said with a blithe smile.

Logan continued to study his brother. He seemed to be sincere, but with James you could never be so sure. "Okay, fine." The genius finally gave in. "But Kendall has to come with us."

The unreadable expression was back on James' face. "Why would Kendall need to come?"

"Just in case you see some hot girl and decide to ditch me. This way I won't be alone."

James had actually felt hurt by this as his brother climbed off the bed, brushing past him as he walked to living room. He shook off the feeling briefly, following his brother out of the bedroom. "We'll meet you in the parking lot." James told Logan. When the short boy was gone James turned to Kendall with a dejected look.

"We?" Kendall raised a brow at the brunet. "James, this was supposed to be your alone time with Logan."

"He won't go unless you do."

"Why?"

"Because he likes you better!" James exclaimed stomping away, slamming the apartment door open as he left.

Kendall was shocked by James' sudden outburst, but he couldn't fight the smile that came to his face at the sound of the underlying jealousy in the pretty boy's tone.

…

"You're not even giving him a chance." Kendall whispered to Logan as they sat in the coffee section of the book store. James was somewhere deeper in the shelves of books, looking for his missing little brother.

"I told you that I had no interest in giving him one." Logan whispered back harshly with a glare. "But you keep trying to leave us alone together."

"Because I can tell you want to get along with James, and he wants to get along with you." Kendall frowned when Logan rolled his eyes at him. "Listen to me, Logan." The blond caught the younger boy's attention by taking hold of his hand. "James wants to get along with you. Him inviting you out was his way of trying to do that. He's trying, Logie. Doesn't that count for something?"

The genius' eyes trailed from their connected hands to the blond's eyes. "I-I guess so." He whispered.

"Please stop pushing him away. It hurts him, and it hurts me to see you guys like this."

Logan sighed heavily. "Okay, okay." He gave in, a small smile tugging at his lips. "You're a sap, you know." He laughed.

Kendall laughed with him. "I am not."

"It hurts me to see you like this, waaah!" Logan did a whiny, over exaggerated version of what Kendall said.

The hockey player laughed out loud at it. "I don't sound like that." He said through his laughs.

"You so did." Logan grinned.

"There you guys are!" James sighed when he finally found his best friend and brother. "I've been looking all over this place for you." The pretty boy's gaze shifted downward to the interlocked hands resting on the table. Logan and Kendall's eyes followed his, falling on their linked hands. Kendall's eyes widened at the thought of how it must have looked to James. He quickly moved his hand to grab his cup of coffee and take a sip. "Did you ditch me?" James continued, turning to Logan.

Logan glanced at Kendall who found his drink very interesting at this moment. "No, I just came to find Kendall." He shrugged. "Do you...want to join us?" He offered.

James and Kendall were both a little surprised by the short boy's question but didn't voice it. James nodded, pulling up a chair beside Logan. It was awkward for a moment, no one knowing what to say in order to start a conversation or at least clear the awkward air.

"So," Logan spoke up first, again shocking the other two. "Kendall told me you have a boyfriend now."

James felt heat travel to his face as he scratched his head awkwardly. "Carlos isn't my boyfriend." He mumbled. "We only had one date."

"But you want him to be your boyfriend." Kendall replied with a smirk.

James didn't deny it, only blushed harder. "Aw, Jamie's got a little crush." Logan joked, pinching the taller brunet's cheek with a giggle.

"Stop it." James pushed the hand away, the blush ever present on his cheeks.

"Tell me about him." Logan poked his brother in the side. "I wanna know who makes former ladies man, James Diamond, blush."

Kendall smiled as he watched them interact with one another, and how easy and natural it looked. It was everything it was supposed to be; they just needed a little nudge.

"But who doesn't like peperoni pizza?" James asked with a laugh.

"I don't." Logan laughed next.

"But why?"

"The peperonis give me heart burn!"

"You're too young for heart burn."

Kendall continued to smile from his spot on the couch, barely paying attention to the hockey highlights playing in front of him. The activity going on in the kitchen was worth highlighting more than this (and if looked like a fight would break out he wanted to be able to nip it in the bud).

"Since when don't you like peperoni?"

"Since always."

Kendall grinned wider at the sound of more laughter, he let his gaze drift away from the TV to the brothers in the kitchen making their own pizza for dinner. But what was most important to Kendall was that they were making it together. "Alright, fine. At least tell me you like mushrooms." James said, pulling the bowl of mushrooms out of the refrigerator.

"Love them." Logan said, popping one into his mouth.

"Me too!" James grinned at the shorter brunet. "Now we have a pizza." He said as he dumped the whole bowl full onto the layer of cheese and other chopped vegetables.

Kendall's nose wrinkle a bit. "Guys, I hate mushrooms."

"Well, then you can come in here and make your own pizza." James told him as the two stuck their tongues out at him.

He would have been annoyed if it wasn't so adorably brotherly. He did roll his eyes, going to the kitchen to start his own pizza. Logan was smirking at him as he started pulling out the ingredients for his dinner. The blond chuckled, poking his tongue out at the brunet. Logan giggled at him, turning his attention back to his and James' pizza.

"Okay," James said loudly, making the other two jump. "I think we're done here so..." James was interrupted by the sound of his phone going off. He checked the caller ID, seeing Carlos' name flashing across the screen. "Uh..." He looked to Logan nervously.

Logan looked at the phone then back at James. "Go on, answer it. I can handle putting the pizza in the oven." He encouraged with a soft smile.

James smiled in thanks, running off to his room to answer the phone.

"You know, you can thank me now." Kendall smirked.

The genius let out a short laugh. "For what?"

"For getting you and James to bond. Admit it, you're having fun with him." The blond nudged.

"I admit, I've missed out on a lot with James." Logan held his hands up with defeat. "So, thank you O Smug One." He bowed to the tall hockey player with a smirk of his own.

"O Smug One?" Kendall quirked a large brow at the name, his smirk widening. "I like it; it's fitting."

Logan laughed. "Of course you would think so."

"Why is that?"

"Because you're smug."

Kendall paused, his smile slowly falling as he realized how close the two of them were standing together. Logan's smile disappeared as well, leaving the two just staring at each other. "We can't do this." Kendall said softly.

"Do what?"

"This." The older boy gestured between them.

The corners of Logan's mouth turned upward in a small smile. "What is this..." He repeated Kendall's gesture. "exactly?"

Kendall paused to think. "I'm not...sure."

They didn't say anything else, only continuing to stare at each other, waiting out the other's next move. Logan's heart sped up when he saw the taller boy slowly leaning forward. It took all of his strength not to just lunge forward and close the remaining gap between them. He didn't want to freak Kendall out. The blond had to do this one his own, at his own pace, even if it was an agonizingly slow one.

The brunet's eyes fluttered shut, sighing happily when their lips finally fitted together, moving easily as if they had done it their whole lives. Logan moaned softly. Kendall lips were the softest he had ever felt. He knew he could kiss them forever if given the chance.

Unfortunately the moment was cut short, Kendall gently pushing the genius away when the door to James' room opened and James reappeared. "That was a short call." Kendall squeaked before clearing his throat.

"Yeah, Carlos, just wanted a schedule a second date." James grinned at the two boys.

"That's great James!" Kendall sounded over enthusiastic about the news but he hoped that James wouldn't be able to tell. "Isn't that great, Logan?" He turned to the still slightly dazed teen standing with him.

The plate boy blinked, mind still hazy from the kiss. When he realized someone was talking to him, all he could do was nod as a dark pink hue dusted over his cheeks.

…

He doesn't know what he was thinking. He had known Logan since he was still in diapers. He watched him grow up. He babysat him for crying out loud! What on Earth possessed Kendall to kiss his best friend's little brother?

Besides those perfectly plump, pink lips turned into a slightly crooked smile as he stood there, just begging to be kissed-

He was a creep, Kendall decided. He was some freaky, cradle robbing, weirdo who went around forcing himself on people way younger than him. Granted, there was only a four year difference between them, and Logan was eighteen. According to the United States government, Logan was an adult and old enough to make his own decisions. That kiss wasn't all his fault, after all. Logan could have pushed his away at any time if he didn't want it. In fact, he was almost encouraging the blond to do it.

But he was still James' little brother.

That fact alone was enough to make Kendall keep his distance from the genius. Luckily it wasn't that hard. Some times he could make it out of the house before either brunet was awake and up to catch him. Sometimes James would keep Logan busy throughout the day-another reason he was glad they were getting along.

Other times he would stay out late, hiding out at different friends' apartments until late at night when he would be able to sneak in and go to bed without question.

As he crept into the apartment he sighed in relief when he saw that the couch was vacant, which probably meant that James and Logan were still out for the night. Tonight would be easier than he thou-"Ah!" Kendall let out a high pitched (but still very manly) scream when he entered his bedroom, flipped on the light and saw Logan sitting on his bed...waiting for him. "Logan!" Kendall breathed, trying to recover from his scare.

"I think this is my favorite room in the apartment. It's definitely more your style."

"What are you doing in my room?" Maybe he wasn't the creepy one after all.

"I wanted to talk to you." Logan climbed off the bed, standing in front of the older male with a glare. "You've been avoiding me for a month!"

Had it really been a month? It felt so much longer. "I haven't been avoiding you."

"Now you're lying."

"Look, Logan, I just wanna get some sleep." Kendall moved past the brunet to get to his dresser.

"Fine." He heard the subtle squeak of his mattress and turned around to see Logan sitting defiantly on his bed.

"Logan." Kendall groaned.

"I'm not moving until we talk. Why don't you want to talk about the kiss?"

"Where is James?"

"On a date. And don't change the subject." Logan continued to glare at the blond. "Why are you avoiding me? Is it because we kissed and you don't know how to tell me you like me...or you don't know how to tell me you don't like me?" Logan's voice took a sad tone as he asked the question.

"It's not that."

"Then what?"

"Because you're a kid!"

"I'm not a kid!" Logan groaned. "And there's no way you really think of me like that."

"How do you figure that?"

"Because you kissed me." Logan stood again slowly moving towards Kendall. "And you want to do it again. I can see it in your eyes-how every few seconds they travel to my lips before you look away. You think about just as much as I do." Kendall's gaze darted away from the brown eyes, not able to deny the statement. Logan cupped the blond's cheeks, bringing his eyes up to meet his own again. "Let me prove to you that I'm not a kid." He whispered, leaning forward and pressing their lips together.

Kendall was hesitant at first, arms slowly circling around the short brunet's waist as the kiss grew deeper. Logan licked along his bottom lip, asking for permission which Kendall gladly granted. It was a little weird that Logan had control of the kiss, but he wasn't complaining. It was actually kind of a turn on.

The tall boy suppressed a small grunt of protest when the younger boy pulled back. "Well...?" His brow quirked inquisitively.

"You're...definitely not a kid." Kendall breathed, a small smile coming to is face. Logan chuckled, pecking the blond on the lips. "James is gonna kill me." He sighed, leaning their foreheads together.

"Let's not think about that right now." Logan said, pulling the taller boy with him as he backed up to the bed, pulling Kendall on top of him as he laid back.

"Logie..." Kendall fought his own urges to jump the boy, because damnit, Logan was sexy like this, but he couldn't fully forget that the brunet in front of him was his best friend's little brother. "We can't." Kendall groaned when Logan began kissing down his jaw, to the crook of his neck.

"Why not?" Logan looked up to the older boy with wide, innocent eyes, driving Kendall insane.

"It wouldn't be right." He pushed the short boy's hands away. "You're only doing it to prove a point."

The hands were back, tugging at his shirt. "But I want to."

Kendall sighed, feeling his restraint weakening as those eyes continued to bare into him. "I can't do this to James."

"What does James have to do with it?"

"You're his little brother and he just got you back! I can't take you away from him-not after I pushed you together."

"Kendall, you're not taking me away." Logan said firmly, taking the apprehensive boy's face in his hands again.

"But James will think so."

"No he won't." Logan protested. "James isn't the over protective big brother type. Please, Kendall, you don't know how long I've wanted this." The genius pleaded, continuing to place light kisses over the older boy's face.

Kendall continued giving small protests, the younger boy ignoring every one. He finally gave into Logan and himself, moving to capture the plump lips in a passion filled kiss.

...

Kendall was now fully dressed again. He looked down at the sleeping brunet in his bed, running a hand through the mused hair. He still couldn't get over how beautiful the younger boy was and determined he was to prove his maturity to him. He smiled at the idea of the genius learning that from him.

The blond chuckled, lifting the genius into his arms and carrying him to the next room. He set him down gently on the mattress, trying to get his pajamas on without waking him. Logan groaned, shifting in his sleep. "Kendall...?" He slowly opened his eyes to view the older boy.

Kendall shushed him gently, petting his head again. "Go back to sleep."

Logan nodded, slowly leaning up to brush their lips together. Kendall smiled at the gesture. He stayed until Logan's breaths evened out again. He quietly left the room, in case James had returned in the middle of the night and was now residing on the couch. The blond was surprised to find the couch still vacant of a certain brunet, especially at this hour.

Kendall shrugged, not too worried about his friend, figuring he'd return soon.

He actually didn't mind it. The emptiness of the apartment gave him time to think. He went to the kitchen and began the process of making coffee. He hadn't slept at all last night. A small blush came to his face, realizing that was partially Logan's fault.

He couldn't believe he actually did that. He was probably the worst friend ever for it. It was wrong on so many levels that the blonde hockey player was almost sure he broke a law somewhere in there. He already broke the bro code. He might as well be put in jail. James was his bro, and Logan was his James' brother. It was practically incest! What he did was wrong.

But it felt so right have Logan in his arms. Their bodies fit together perfectly in every way possible. Everything about Logan was intoxicating and amazing. The feel and taste of his soft skin, his voice, his laugh, his smile, how he knew something (if not everything) about everything. No matter how wrong his head told him it was, his heart was telling his otherwise.

Kendall must have been zoned out for a while. His cup of coffee had gone cold and now the sun was fully shining through the windows, a sign that at least an hour had gone by. "Good morning." A small, tired voice came from down the hall.

Kendall looked up and smiled when Logan approached him, rubbing his eyes tiredly. "Hey." He watched the genius go straight for the coffee pot. "How'd you sleep?"

Logan flashed a small smile. "Good." He said taking a sip of his coffee. His brows came together when he took a look at the older boy. "You've been thinking, haven't you?"

The blond chuckled. "Yeah, I have."

The brunet looked hesitant. "...You don't regret last night, do you?" He asked slowly.

Kendall nearly choked on his cold coffee at the question. "No! No, of course not." He said quickly. Logan visibly relaxed at the blond's words. "I'm just worried about what James will think."

"We could always...not tell him." Logan suggested with a small smirk.

"I don't know..."

"Just until you're ready and you think you think he could handle it, then we'll tell him." Logan wrapped his arms around the taller boy's neck. "Sound like a plan?"

"Hm," Kendall moaned thoughtfully as the younger boy began placing peck after peck on his lips. "I guess I have no choice." He chuckled.

"Not really." Logan agreed, pulling the older boy into a deeper kiss. Before the kiss could grow too heated, Logan was pulling away. "Do you want to know a secret?" Kendall hummed, continuing to kiss down the brunet's jaw and neck. "I used to have the biggest crush on you." He confessed with a blush.

He could feel Kendall's smirk against his skin. "I've got a confession...I knew."

Logan pulled back, staring at the blond incredulously. "You knew?" He squeaked.

"Yeah, you were kind of obvious." Kendall laughed. "You would always stare at me like I was the best thing that ever happened to you." Kendall's brow rose and his smirk grew as he studied the younger boy's features. "Kind of like you are now."

Logan's eyes widened, blush deepening, causing Kendall to chuckle.

"Kendall!" The door swung open and the two in the kitchen jumped apart. "Kendall, I have to talk to-oh, Logan, you're up." James paused his frenzy upon seeing his little brother in the kitchen along with Kendall.

Logan gave a small wave, bringing his coffee cup back to his lips in hopes of covering his blush.

"Uh, James, where were you all night?" Kendall tried changing the subject.

"I went to a party with Carlos. It ended late, so I just crashed at his place." James shrugged.

Kendall and Logan's eyebrows rose.

"Nothing happened!" The tall brunet exclaimed, heat rising to his cheeks. "We haven't been dating that long and I respect him way more than that." Kendall coughed, his coffee going down the wrong pipe in surprise. Logan bit his lip, finding more interest in the bottle of cream on the counter. "Oh, good. You made coffee." James sounded grateful.

"Sorry, man. Logan finished the rest." Kendall smiled apologetically, pouring his own coffee down the drain in the sink.

"Logan drinks coffee?" James laughed. "Aren't you like twelve?"

Logan was the only one who noticed Kendall wince. "I'm eighteen, James." He said with a forced smile, though he wasn't humored by the comment.

"Well, you're my baby brother. You'll always be twelve to me."

"I'm gonna go shower." Logan quickly changed the subject, seeing the guilt ridden look on the hockey player's face from the corner of his eye. "Are we still hanging out today?"

James nodded, though Logan was leaving before he answered. When the bedroom door shut, James turned to Kendall with a serious look. "I have to talk to you." He said lowly.

Kendall looked up worriedly. "About...?"

"When I went to the party last night, I ran into some guy. Apparently, he saw us at the bookstore a while back and, get this, he asked me for Logan's number!"

The blond had to suppress the natural urge to glare as jealousy ran through him. "And...what did you say?"

"I told him no." James said, tone indicating that it was the obvious answer. "Can you believe that?"

"Well, James, Logan isn't a kid anymore. People are going to notice."

"He's still a kid to me." James glared at his friend. "I lost so much time with him when we were younger that it's hard to process the fact that he's eighteen. When I look at him, I still see a twelve year old. And I'm going to protect him like I should have done then."

Kendall was feeling a mix of emotions as James said this—pride in his friend for wanting to stick up for Logan, but nervousness was the most prominent of them all. "B-but Logan's a smart kid."

"Yeah, book smart. But he's still pretty naive. If someone took advantage of him and hurt him..." James let the sentence hang, the threatening tone was enough to let anyone know that the end results wouldn't be pretty. "I just want to make sure that never happens."

Kendall gulped.

…

Kendall felt really guilty about sneaking around with Logan. Not only was he keeping this huge secret from his best friend, but he didn't feel like it was fair to Logan. Of course, when he brought it up to the genius, he claimed that it was just fine. He was happy just being with the blond, even if it was in secret.

No matter how many times the younger boy told him, it didn't help rid him of the guilt he felt when he had to push the brunet away when James entered the room or how he had to wait until the wee hours of the night when James was surely asleep in order to make love to his secret lover. He just couldn't bring himself to face the tall brunet and confess to having a relationship with his little brother.

The blond would never admit this, but he was slightly afraid of what the pretty boy would do to him if he found out.

Kendall could also tell that, despite his constant words of reassurance, Logan wanted the sneaking around to end. He could see the slightly envious look in the brunet's eyes when James announced he had a date with Carlos or when the older boy brought his boyfriend around and would act all boyfriend-y with him. Logan wanted Kendall to be able to hold his hand, or for them to go out in public, or at least be able to curl up on the couch together without fear of James walking in a catching them.

That was all hard to do seeing as James always seemed to be around lately. It was easier when James was out on a date. They were able to time it just right so that they looked totally nonchalant by the time James came back. Now, he rarely went out with Carlos anymore. He would always bring the Latino over the apartment and the four of them would spend the evenings together as a group.

Logan was getting frustrated.

The hockey player sighed as he watched the movie play on the TV from his place on the floor, a good distance from Logan who was seated on the far side of the couch, James and Carlos cuddled up together right between them. Kendall stared almost longingly at the genius.

Let's just say that Logan wasn't the only one feeling the affects of James' sudden company.

The sound of almost inaudible buzzing had Carlos wiggling out of James' arms to pick up his phone. After seeing who it was, he quietly excused himself and left the room. Kendall sighed again, standing to his feet. "I'm gonna head to bed." He announced.

Logan shot him a weary yet pleading look, probably to convince him to wait it out until Carlos was gone and James went to bed. Kendall shrugged, simply to say it wouldn't happen tonight. His heart clenched with guilt as Logan turned his attention back to the TV with a pout. "Good night." He called over his shoulder, receiving two murmurs of good night in return.

He wasn't asleep. He couldn't sleep. The guilt was keeping him awake. Why did he have to be such a coward about this? It's not like he was he was fucking Logan just to fuck him. He actually had feelings for the brunet. Surely James would understand that. Although, that didn't take the fear that James wouldn't understand out of his heart.

The blond squinted when the door to his room cracked open, letting in light from the hallway. "Kendall?" Logan's voice came in a whisper. "Are you still up?" He asked, quietly closing the door behind him.

"Yeah," Kendall sat up, only to be pushed back down when Logan jumped on top of him. He chuckled as the genius kissed him repeatedly. "Missed you." He mumbled between kisses.

"I missed you too." Logan rolled beside him, immediately cuddling into his side with a small sigh.

Kendall wrapped his arms tightly around the younger boy, truly having missed the contact. "What happened with James and Carlos?" He doesn't know why he asked. He didn't actually care. Maybe he just wanted to hear Logan's voice.

"Carlos got that part he tried out for." He mumbled into the hockey player's chest. "James was so happy for him that they started making out." Logan chuckled. "I don't think they even noticed that I left."

Kendall laughed, knowing how it felt with James' previous dates. It was awkward, but only for the unlucky third wheel. "That sounds like James."

"Mmhm." Logan snuggled closer to him, making the blond smile. "Carlos wants us to go to some big cast party they're having for it."

Kendall's brow quirked with interest. "Really?" He felt the brunet nod. He released his hold on the younger boy who made a small noise of protest. "Do you want to go?"

"Not really..." Logan was confused by the taller boy's sudden excitement. "Why? Do you?"

Kendall shrugged. "Why not? It might be fun."

"Maybe, but do you know what would be more fun?" Kendall shrugged. "Letting James and Carlos go and us spending the night alone here." Logan said, Kendall catching the suggestive undertone of the idea.

Kendall smirked that smug smirk. "So you'd rather spend another night at home then to go out on a date with me?"

Logan's eyes widened, and even in the dark Kendall could see the spark of hope and excitement in them. "A date? Like...a real date?" He tried not to let his excitement show through his voice, but it was difficult. He was really excited.

"Yep."

"So, we can hold hands?"

"Not in front of James or Carlos...or around too many people."

"Okay..." Logan dragged out the word, because there were sure to be a lot of people everywhere. "Can we kiss?"

Kendall's face twisted. "It's probably better if we didn't."

"Can we at least sit together?"

"Not too close."

"Kendall!"

The blond quickly shushed him, clapping a hand over his mouth. He waited tensely, in case James had heard him. When he deemed it safe, he turned back to the brunet who was now glaring at him. He removed his hand, smiling sheepishly. "Okay, we can hold hands and sit together, but we have to be super careful." He warned when Logan's smile returned.

"What about kissing?"

"This is Hollywood and James knows a lot of people and a lot of people know James. If anyone sees us and James finds out..." Kendall sighed. "I just don't want him to find out from anyone but us."

"I get that, but..." Logan made his eyes wide and innocent and poked out his bottom lip. "not even one kiss?"

Kendall smiled a bit, finding Logan's pouty face a lot cuter than James'. "One kiss." He caved.

The bright smile he got in return was totally worth the risk of getting caught.

…

The count down to the party was a slow one. Maybe it was nerves from the idea that James might catch them. Maybe it was impatience to finally have his first date with Logan. Every time the party was mentioned, he looked to the brunet. He could see the contained pure enthusiasm in the big brown eyes. The more he saw it, the more he thought the slow moving week was due to impatience.

Finally the night of the party came. The music was loud and the mansion the party was being held was packed with people. "Logan, stay close to me so you don't get lost." James had to yell over the music.

"James, I think I can handle..."

"I'll stay with him, James." Kendall interrupted. "You go have fun with Carlos."

"Are you sure?" James' brows came together in uncertainty.

"Positive." Kendall reassured the pretty boy with a charming smile.

James still looked unsure but then there was a tugging at his arm. "James, come on, Logan's a big boy." Carlos flashed a grin at the younger brunet before moving his attention back to James. "He'll be fine with Kendall." The Latino started pulling his boyfriend away, his protests only being drowned out by the music.

Kendall turned to Logan who was full on grinning now that they were alone.

The smile didn't last long. Kendall was too busy watching for James that he didn't keep any of his promises. He flinched away every time the genius made a move to hold his hand, he all but ran away when he thought they were too close, and now instead of dancing with him he was busy looking over his shoulder every five seconds to make sure James was nowhere nearby.

"Would you stop it?" Logan yelled, catching the paranoid blond's attention. "James is nowhere around."

"You don't know that."

"I do know that you're being paranoid for no reason. So what if James finds out? You never know, he might be happy for us."

Kendall shook his head, finding the boy's optimism cute but couldn't help but think he was also a bit wide-eyed. "I don't think so, Logie." He finally said. "James has gotten really protective of you lately. He won't be happy to find out something like that about his baby brother."

Logan rolled his eyes. "God! I am so sick of everyone treating me like I'm a kid."

"But you are a kid Logan!"

"A kid that you fucked!" The genius glared at him. Kendall immediately shushed him, making the brunet's eyes narrow further. "Don't shush me. No one is around. No one cares!" He turned to the crowd around them. "Kendall and I had sex!" He began yelling repeatedly.

Kendall's eyes widened in panic, clamping a hand over the younger boy's mouth hurriedly as he dragged him away. He shot sheepish smiles and casual heys to people who gave him odd looks as he brought the boy to one of the empty upstairs rooms in the mansion. He finally let go when the door was shut and locked. "What is your problem?" The hockey player screeched.

"You're the one with the problem. You think everyone at this party is gonna turn around and tell James that we had sex!" He shouted the last part, Kendall cringing as it echoed throughout the room.

"Damn it, Logan! This is why I didn't want to do this." Kendall glared at the younger boy. "I knew from the start that this was a bad idea. And, you know, maybe James was right about you."

"That I'm a naive kid?" Logan shrugged, James' words like water off a ducks back.

"No, that you're a brat."

Silence filled the room after that. Kendall regretted the words as soon as they left his mouth. His heart filled with guilt when he saw Logan's expression morph to one of anger and hurt. He looked like he wanted to punch the blond but at the same time wanted to bust out in tears. He honestly wouldn't blame his for doing either. "Logie..."

"I have to go find James." The brunet said quickly, bypassing Kendall to walk through the door.

Kendall collapsed in a near by chair, groaning into his hands. Logan was probably off to go tell James everything so that the brunet would come up and kick his ass. Not that he didn't deserve that and more for hurting the younger boy the way he did. Tonight was supposed to be the night to make up for that, but instead he made it worse.

He should give the teen a little more credit though. He was young but he wouldn't go around 'tattling' just because he was mad. No, he was probably just telling James that he wanted to go home. But James was probably still having fun with Carlos. He knew that James wouldn't hesitate to take Logan home if he asked, but the blond would feel horrible about everyone having to stop having a good time because of him.

Kendall sighed, deciding to go downstairs and find Logan to take him home. Maybe they could talk on the ride back or once they were alone in the apartment. Possibly both. Kendall was willing to endure hell and back to make things right with Logan.

The thought should have scared him more than it did.

He walked down the stairs, the party still in full swing. There were people chatting up presumably important people in order to make their careers successful. Other people were chatting up the opposite sex (some even the same sex) in order to entice them into dates or maybe just a quick fuck. The majority of the crowd was still dancing to the upbeat club music playing through the giant speakers. The hockey player stood at the top of the stairs, trying to find James, Carlos, and especially Logan in the crowd.

When he spotted a brunet doing jazz hands over his face, he quickly moved down the stairs, heading toward his best friend. "James!" He yelled, tapping the tall boy's shoulder.

"Oh, hey, man." James greeted with a wide smile.

Carlos stood behind him, sending a large smile also. He felt kind of bad that he wasn't able to return it. "Are you having fun?" The Latino questioned.

Kendall was about to respond sarcastically, saying he was having a blast when he realized...

"Where's Logan?" James voiced before he could think it. The hazel eyes searched through the sea of people for his brother.

"You mean you haven't seen him?"

Carlos and James' smiles fell as Kendall asked this. "Why would we have seen him? He was supposed to be with you!" James' panic voice was back.

Carlos placed a hand on the brunet's bicep. "James, calm down. I'm sure he's fine." He tried to reassure.

"Fine? Carlos, my little brother is lost in a strange house, in a strange neighborhood, in a strange city! And you want me to calm down?" Kendall had never actually heard the pretty boy's voice reach that octave of panic before.

"Yes," Carlos gave James a firm look. "It's okay. We'll find him."

They devised a plan to split up and search the entire house for Logan. Carlos would check all the bathrooms and downstairs bedrooms and closets. Kendall would look through the large crowds of people, asking if anyone had seen the genius. James was to check the upstairs. Kendall didn't mention that Logan wouldn't be up there because he was just upstairs with the brunet. He wassn't sure how that would sound to his friends and it wouldn't hurt to look twice.

Though he didn't miss the glare he received from James before they split off.

…

"I can't find him anywhere." James sighed when they all met up outside the party. It was a lot easier to communicate when they didn't have to yell at each other. "Who knows what happened to him? How did you lose him, Kendall?" James directed another glare at his blond friend.

"James, we're not going to get anywhere by blaming Kendall." Carlos tried to calm his boyfriend down once again, but James still had an icy glare aimed at him. "We have to focus on finding Logan. What happened before you lost him?" Carlos looked to Kendall for an answer.

Kendall couldn't tell them the whole truth but he couldn't lie either. Lying wouldn't help them find Logan, but telling the truth wouldn't get that look off James' face. "He...said he was going to look for James and he walked away." The hockey player shrugged.

"That's it?"

Kendall bit his lip, nodding.

"Then he still has to be here, right?" Carlos asked optimistically. "If he was looking for James then he wouldn't have gone anywhere else."

"But where? We searched everywhere and couldn't find him." James looked worried, tired, and frustrated by the whole situation.

"Look again. He has to be somewhere." The short boy said.

The other two nodded, going back into the party to continue their search. Kendall continued to ask people if they had seen the genius, possibly going into too much detail when describing him (he was getting some odd looks from people). Carlos looked in all the downstairs rooms again. James sighed, making his way back up the stairs. He had walked in on several couples, apologizing and sometimes congratulating. He couldn't help the relief he felt every time he opened the door to a room filled with obscene noises and found his little brother not to be there. This was bittersweet, for that also meant he still hadn't found the brunet.

He got to the last door, listening for any kind of sounds. All he heard was soft gasps, but not of the profane sort. He twisted the knob and entered the dark room. A shaking body laid on the bed. It was obvious now to the pretty boy that the person inside was crying. "Logan?" He asked. Seeing the chocolate brown eyes, brimmed with tears, look up at him had his heart aching and his fists clenching. He wanted to punch the lights out of whoever was the cause of the tears streaming down his brother's face.

Putting all angry feelings aside-for now-James climbed onto the bed, bringing the younger boy into his arms. Logan began crying harder into his chest, and all James could do was whisper calming words to him. When the sobs turned to hiccups, James thought that maybe Logan had become calm enough to talk to him. "Logan, what happened? We've been looking for you everywhere."

Logan sniffed. "I walked around for a little bit, then I came up here."

"You told Kendall you were coming to find me." When the genius whimpered, James pulled him closer to his chest, rubbing soothing circles in his back. "Why are you crying? Did something happen? Did someone hurt you?" James felt his anger rising again at the idea of any touching, even looking, at his brother the wrong way.

Logan shook his head, another sob escaping. "No one wants me." He whimpered.

James' brows came together as he said this. "What?"

Logan was crying again. "No one w-wants me." He said louder. "Not my dad, not you, not even..." He cut himself off as loud sobs left him, and heavy tears spilled down his cheeks once again.

It finally dawned on James what the teen was saying, and he could feel his heart snapping in half. He never knew how insecure Logan was. How scarred his dad leaving and James' negligence had made him. He held the brunet tighter, feeling a ton of guilt crashing on him as he realized that he had a hand in breaking the young man in his arms. "I'm sorry, Logan. I really am." His own tears were gathering in his eyes.

Logan's body continued to tremble as he cried. "Why doesn't anyone want me?" He whimpered.

"Don't say that. A lot of people want you." James continued to rub the teen's back, hoping it would help ease him.

"Then why did my dad leave?" He hiccuped.

James' eyes narrowed, remembering the first man their mom had dated and fallen hopelessly in love with after her first husband (James' dad) had walked out on her. She had even changed her name from Brooke Diamond to Brooke Mitchell. James still didn't think it fit.

James was happy for them, of course. His mom had finally found a guy that made her happy like his dad did. He would bring his mom flowers on random days of the week. He took her out, leaving James with a babysitter those nights. He wasn't always nice to James. The man never hit him or anything, but he never treated James like his son. But back then, he didn't care. He finally had a family again.

He became even more excited when his mom announced that she was expecting. He couldn't wait to have a little sibling to play with and watch out for. But shortly after Logan was born, Roy Mitchell took on more hours at work. He spent less time at home, and less time with James' mom. Logan barely got to know his dad, but still looked up to him. Looking for a way to impress the man in any way a four year old could, even deciding to become a doctor, just like his dad.

Roy never even blinked.

James still remembered the summer Roy suddenly disappeared. They couldn't reach him on his cell phone or work phone and when James came home from summer school he found all of Roy's stuff gone. Brooke was devastated. Logan didn't stop crying for a week.

Suddenly, with the younger boy in his arms, tears streaming down his face as he cried his eyes out was all too familiar.

"Logan, Roy was an asshole. He was mean and wasn't even very smart. You wouldn't have liked him anyway." He smiled a bit when he felt Logan laugh through his tears. "And as for me...I didn't know I was hurting you. I guess that's not an excuse, but I do want you Logan. You're my baby brother. I love you and care about you so much. I wouldn't have run all over this mansion looking for you if I didn't." Logan sniffed lightly, moving his gaze up to look at his brother. "God, Logan, I didn't know what happened to you. I thought anything could have happened. I was worried sick."

"You were?"

"Of course I was!" James couldn't believe Logan even had to ask. "We all were-me, Carlos, Kendall..." James lifted the brunet's gaze when he looked away. "We all care about you. Roy and whoever this other guy is are idiots because they missed out on the opportunity to have the smartest, most amazing boy be apart of their life."

"Thanks James." Logan managed a small smile, wiping his tear stained face with his sleeve.

"Who was he anyway?" Logan raised an inquisitive brow at the pretty boy. "The third guy. Who is he?"

Logan blushed. "Oh, no one."

"Come on, tell me." James prodded.

"He's just..." Logan felt tears brimming in his eyes again. "This guy I really liked doesn't like me back."

James' expression softened. "Logan..."

"Can we go home now? I'm feeling kind of tired."

James nodded, standing up from the bed and guiding Logan back downstairs. He texted Carlos and Kendall to meet them outside and the two showed up within seconds. "You found him!" Carlos smiled brightly. "Logan are you okay?" His expression turned to concern as soon as he took notice of the young boy's puffy red eyes and flushed cheeks.

"I'm fine." He mumbled keeping his eyes away from Kendall's which were staring into him, making the pale boy uncomfortable.

"We should probably head back to the apartment. It's getting pretty late." James said, pulling Logan closer to him.

Carlos nodded following the two brothers to the car. Kendall stayed just a beat behind the group, sighing heavily before following as well.

…

Logan shuffled out of the bedroom with a yawn. "Morning." The brunet stopped, seeing the blond sitting on the couch. He looked tired, like he had gotten no sleep at all. Logan felt like he shouldn't have been so happy about that. But he spent hours crying over the older boy. He felt less pathetic knowing that Kendall wasn't takening the fight well either. "Can we talk?" He asked, eyes pleading and looking desperate.

Logan was hesitant, unconsciously backing away from the blond. He didn't want to talk to Kendall now. He wasn't ready. The hockey player was probably just going to make an offical end to the relationship. He wouldn't want to be with a brat. "Where's James?" He asked.

"He went with Carlos to get breakfast." Kendall answered quickly. "Look, Logie, I know you're mad at me. But James told me everything and...you have to know that it's not true."

Logan crossed his arms insecurely, still not able to look at the older boy. "I think you made it pretty clear when you called me a brat." He wasn't being childish. Maybe just a bit bitter.

"But you're not! I was just upset." Kendall explained, arms flailing desperately. "I was stressed from the paranoia of James catching us and then you got mad at me and..." Kendall sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I don't think you're a brat, and even if I did, I'd still want you...b-because I love you."

Logan felt his eyes widen. "Y-you do?"

"Yes," Kendall practically laughed. "Now I'm just worried that the only reason you wanted me was because I was the only guy in your life who gave you any attention. Which...would make the last thing I said really embarrassing because you don't feel the same..."

"No, no, no! Kendall, it goes so much deeper than that. You have no idea." Logan stopped the taller boy's ridiculous ramblings, launching himself into Kendall arms. "I'm not confused. Not even a little. I've been in love with you for years." He confessed.

"Really?" Now Kendall sounded insecure.

"Something the O Smug One didn't know, huh?" Logan joked, causing Kendall to chuckle. "I love you." He said softly.

"I love you too." Kendall leaned down, capturing the brunet's lips in a slow, tender kiss.

They both felt like a great weight had been lifted from their shoulders, in fact letting out sighs of solace when their lips met. Before the kiss could get too heated, the front door swung open and James' voice had them jumping apart. "What the hell?" The pretty boy screamed.

"James!" Kendall's eyes were wide from surprise and the fright of the seething brunet standing at the door, his boyfriend standing behind him, trying to catch his attention.

"James. James, calm down." Carlos tried to sooth.

"Calm down?" James' voice was still loud and angry. "I walked into my apartment to see my best friend sucking face with my little brother. How can I calm down?" He stomped over to the couple, glaring straight at the smaller in stature blond. "I mean, I had my suspicions already but I didn't want to believe it."

Kendall gulped at seeing the absolute fury in the brunet's eyes. "James, it's not what you think." Logan cut in, stepping between the two friends. "Kendall wasn't forcing himself on me or anything. I wanted the kiss."

"See, James? It's all good!" Carlos tried to calm the pretty boy down again.

"Wait," James continued to frown. The wheels in his head were turning as he thought. "So...you like him?" The tall boy asked his brother, pointing a finger towards Kendall.

Logan gave a small nod.

James' gaze drifted to Kendall before going back to Logan. "Is he..." James didn't have to complete the sentence before he got his answer from the look in the genius' eyes. The brown irises implored the older boy to have mercy on the blond. He knew James would be mad when he found out about the two of them, but he would be furious to know that Kendall was the cause of the pale boy's emotional turmoil last night.

Kendall took a step back. James eyes were on him then, fists clenched at his sides. The usually soft hazel eyes were blazing with fury as he stared into the green eyes before him. "James..." He started calmly, hoping to get a word in to stop the tall brunet before he could act on his emotions.

He didn't get a chance to complete the thought, the pretty boy's fist colliding into his jaw put a stop to all words. Logan gasped when Kendall fell to the ground from the shock of the punch. James may look pretty, but he had a pretty good left hook.

Carlos immediately ran to James, holding him back from doing anymore damage. James continued to struggle against his boyfriend's hold, shouting a whole array of threats and insults at the blond on the floor. Logan went to Kendall, making sure he wasn't too hurt. He was holding his jaw, groaning in pain. The future doctor could see that a bruise was already forming on the afflicted area, but his jaw wasn't broken. Some swelling, soreness, and a nasty bruise to show for it-tops.

Too involved with Kendall, Logan barely registered Carlos begging James to calm down and the sound of his brother stomping away. He finally looked up from examining his love's face when the front door slammed shut. Carlos was still there, looking stressed and under that, a little rattled. He probably wasn't used to seeing the brunet so angry and it scared him slightly. "Are you okay?" Logan asked him.

Carlos looked to him, eyes shining with worrisome tears. "I'm fine." He sighed then chuckled. "What are you asking me for? Kendall's the one who got punched."

Logan let out a small chuckle, looking to Kendall who looked just as upset as everyone else. The genius assumed it was for different reasons than his own, just as Carlos' were unlike from his. "He'll be fine." He gently stroked the blond's cheek. "It'll just hurt for a while. Could you get some ice and wrap it in a towel?" He asked the short Latino.

Carlos nodded, running off to the kitchen to do as told. Logan continued to eye the bruise, poking it with his finger. "Ow!" The previously speechless Kendall hissed, directing a small glare at the teen. "That hurts." He whimpered.

"Sorry." Logan chuckled.

Kendall eyed the shorter boy curiously when the smile still remained on his lips. "What are you all smiley about?"

"Just..." Logan laughed at himself, not able to take his eyes off the black and blue flesh. "I didn't know James cared that much." He poked it again, causing Kendall to wince.

"I told you he did." Kendall smiled as well.

Logan nodded. "Right, as always, O Smug One."

Kendall smiled with satisfaction.

Logan poked him in a jaw to wipe the look off his face.

…

Kendall sighed, untangling himself from his boyfriend's hold to go answer the door before the knocking woke him up. He opened the door to see Carlos smiling kindly at him as always. But this smile was different, more sympathetic. "Did you find him?" He asked quietly.

Carlos nodded. "He's at my place. He asked me to come over here and get some of his stuff." He paused, looking sadder. "He's still really upset."

"I figured." Kendall sighed sadly. "Alright, come in. His room is down the hall." He directed the Latino down the hall.

He sat back beside Logan, the brunet immediately snuggling into his body when his warmth returned. Kendall smiled at the crooked smile that adorned the young boy's features as he slept. After a few minutes Carlos emerged from the back, a duffle bag filled with James' clothes slung over his shoulder. "You should talk to him." He said.

"James isn't going to talk to me. He didn't even come to get his own clothes." Kendall frowned.

"I know, just give him some time. Let him cool off a while and then try to talk to him. I know you don't want to lose your best friend, and Logan just got his big brother back." Kendall nodded in agreement, hating the idea of being the person to tear apart the relationship the two brothers just built. "In the mean time, I'll talk to James. I'll try to convince him to come over and talk."

"Thanks Carlitos." Kendall smiled appreciatively.

"No problem. I hate seeing friends fight."

…

"Why are we here?" James' face seemed to be twisted into a permanent scowl as he and Carlos approached his apartment.

"You said you missed Logan. So we're here to see Logan." Carlos smiled, seeming extra bubbly than usual, making James' eyes narrow further suspiciously.

It had been at least a week since James temporarily moved in with Carlos. He had since apologized to Carlos for scaring him. Carlos forgave him on the condition that James talked to Kendall about what happened. The pretty boy agreed, not able to say no to the puppy dog eyes his boyfriend had given him. He promised he would, in due time, but James made very little effort to attempt to make contact with his old room mate. He never returned the blond's calls or his texts.

At this point, Carlos knew that James was just being stubborn and wouldn't talk to Kendall without a little push. That's where they found themselves, outside the door of 2J. "I know he's home, Carlos." James crossed his arms.

"Yet, you still came here." Carlos stated curiously as he knocked on the door. Obviously when James mentioned missing Logan, he meant he missed Kendall as well but was too stubborn to admit it.

They both waited until the door was opened by Logan. "Carlos, James!" The genius said happily, giving both men a hug. "Kendall, it's Carlos and he brought James." James' frown deepened, seeing that Logan was extra bubbly today too. Perhaps the prospect that the two tallest boys' friendship would be mended.

Kendall appeared from the kitchen, looking hesitant as he approached James. "Hey." He said softly.

"Hey." James mumbled in response.

There was still slight tension in the air as the two friends stared everywhere but at each other. "Uh...Logan and I are gonna go downstairs and wait for you guys in the lobby." Carlos spoke up, slowly backing out of the room and pulling Logan with him.

When the door shut Kendall looked up, taking a deep breath before he spoke. "You're mad at me." James made a noise, only confirming the blond's statement. "You have every right to be, but...dude, you can't be mad forever. Logan's forgiven me. Why can't you?" Kendall's voice held a pleading tone.

James slowly turned his gaze to Kendall, his glare still in place but not nearly as intense. "Kendall imagine some asshole breaking Katie's already fragile heart, and finding her crying alone. Tell me that if you held your baby sister in your arms as she cried and told you that no one wanted her, would you forgive the guy who drove her to the point that she was that insecure with herself?" James feigned curiosity as he asked this. "Could you, Kendall?"

The blond bowed his head, knowing he would have done far worse to a guy that did that to Katie.

"I just...can't believe you of all people did it." James continued. "You're my best friend in the whole world, Kendall. We've been through a lot together, and I've always had your back like you always had mine. I trust you with my life and everything in it." The brunet took a deep calming breath as his voice began to shake with emotion. "But now, every time I see you, all I wanna do is punch your lights out because all I can think about is Logan crying in my arms that night."

Kendall nodded. "I get it." He shrugged. "But...could we ever get back to what we were?"

"Maybe..." James shrugged as well. "But you're gonna have to do a lot to gain my trust back. I'm not as easy as Logan. He likes you." The blond nodded again, fulling understanding where James was coming from. "And one more thing."

"Anything."

"...Do you really like my brother?"

"I love him." Kendall responded immediately.

That brought a small smile to the pretty boy's face. "Good." He turned to move toward the door with Kendall trialing behind him. "But if you hurt him again," James turned around suddenly, eyes once again narrowed at the blond. "I'm gonna do a lot more than punch you."

Kendall nodded dumbly, for the first time, truly afraid of the brunet.

"So...?" Carlos prompted once they saw the two enter the lobby.

"Is everything good again?" Logan shot a worried glance at his boyfriend.

"It's fine." James reassured his boyfriend, slipping an arm around the Latino's shoulders.

"It's not exactly the way it was before, but we've got plenty of time to work on it." Kendall was about to wrap an arm around Logan. When he caught glimps of James' glare, he lowered it back to his side.

"That's great!" Carlos kissed the tall boy's cheek, showing that he was officially forgiven.

"It is." Logan grinned. "But now I only have a few days left in LA before I have to go back to Minnesota." He said somewhat sadly.

Kendall frowned, suddenly remembering that he did indeed have a limited time with the genius. "We should make the most of it." He said optimistically. "What do you wanna do, Logie?"

That's how the group found their way to the roof of the Palmwoods, watching the sun set.

…

"It was great meeting you, Logan." Carlos said, hugging the younger boy tightly.

"You too, Carlos." Logan hugged back just as tight. The foursome stood in the airport, saying goodbye to the visiting teen. None of them wanted to see the genius go, but he was starting college soon-a fact that James still hadn't quite accepted. Logan promised to come back and see them every chance he got. No amount of promises made the goodbye any easier. "Make sure to take care of James." He smiled when the tan boy released him.

"You know I will." He grinned, wrapping his arms around the tall brunet's torso.

James chuckled, hugging his boyfriend close. "Have fun in school, little bro." He ruffled the short brunet locks, smiling wider at Logan's glare.

Logan rolled his eyes at his big brother's antics, deciding not to fret about it. He then turned his gaze on Kendall who had remained silent for most of the morning. They just stood there staring at each other, not sure how to go about a satisfying goodbye with James standing right was watching the two closely and had been ever since he had finally moved back into the apartment.

They still didn't get any real alone time together. James and Carlos joined them on all their public dates, and when they stayed in the apartment, James was always 'looking over a script' in the kitchen, or 'studying' in his bedroom with the door wide open so he could hear everything going on in the living room (the only room he allowed these apartment dates to take place).

Logan was just happy that Kendall didn't have to push him away every time James came in the room.

But all that left him with the desperate need to touch the blond. Logan looked to Carlos, the Latino catching on quickly. "Come on, James." Carlos began pulling the pretty boy away.

James continued to watch them as he allowed Carlos to drag him to another part of the airport.

Logan looked back to Kendall with a large smile. "Hi."

"Hey." Kendall grinned down at him.

When Logan leaned forward to kiss the hockey player, Kendall cleared his throat awkwardly, eyes darting to James' glare and back to Logan. The genius rolled his eyes, but otherwise stepped back to put more space between them. This put Kendall and James back at ease. "Now I wish I had applied to some colleges out here like mom told me to." Logan mumbled.

Kendall smiled with empathy. "You could always transfer." He suggested hopefully. "Get your associates in Minnesota and then come back here and finish up."

"So...this wasn't just a summer thing for you?" He asked hopefully when he heard Kendall's plan to get him back to LA.

"Logie, I got punched in the jaw for you." Kendall laughed. "I'm pretty sure this is more than a fling."

Logan quirked a brow at him. "Only pretty sure?"

"More than sure. This is for real, Logie, I promise." The older boy guaranteed with a dimpled smile.

Logan nodded with a blush. He was seriously considering transferring now. "I'm gonna miss you a lot, you know." He said softly.

"I know. I'm gonna miss you too. But I'll call you everyday, so keep your phone on you."

Logan chuckled. "I know. I will." He looked up at the blond, all his love and adoration for the hockey player shining in his eyes. "I love you."

"I love you too." Logan moved to kiss the blond again. Kendall made another noise of protest, eyes once again darting to James who's eyes never left the couple. He instead held out his hand, Logan chuckling when he saw it. He grabbed the hand, shaking it with a sneaky smile. "What are you..." The question was cut off by Logan pulling the older boy by the the hand into a forceful kiss. Logan didn't realize how much he missed the soft lips until they were once again moving with his own, taking control over the kiss almost immediately. The genius wasn't sure how he was going to go back to Minnesota without the blond because he was positive he wouldn't be able to go long periods of time without kissing these lips again.

When Kendall licked along his bottom lip, and began teasing and pressing against all his sensitive spots, he knew he could do this forever.

"Alright, you two. That's enough." James' voice cut in, effectively killing the moment.

The couple pulled apart, slightly out of breath but grinning hugely. "You're gonna get me killed." Kendall laughed, catching James' glare from the corner of his eye.

"You'd die a happy man."

"Very happy." Kendall leaned down, giving the genius another peck. "Call me when you land."

Logan nodded, knowing this was it. He turned around, adjusting the strap of his carry-on as he moved toward airport security. Before he passed, he gave one final wave to his brother, friend and boyfriend, who waved back with sad smiles. His heart was aching as he walked further and further away from the group. He didn't know what would happen after he boarded that plane. Would everything change? Would Kendall keep his promise to him? He wasn't a fortune teller. He didn't know what his future held and part of his hated not knowing.

When his phone vibrated in his pocket and he saw the I miss you already text from a certain blond hockey player, he knew that whatever the future had in store for him would be no problem with Kendall beside him.