Title: Countdown
Author: Katy (Darwin's Ape)
Beta: Mel, who kicks arse (and also writes damn well - La Corneille - http://www.fanfiction.net/profile.php?userid=91878). All mistakes, however, are mine.
Rating: PG
Category: Hastur/Ligur - Angst
Archive: Wherever, just tell me, OK?
Disclaimer: Shockingly enough, they're not mine. This is why it's called *Fan*fic. The good stuff belongs to Pterry and Gneil and if either of them objects in any way, consider this fic erased from living memory. Literally.
Notes: There isn't enough H/L fic around. Instead of reading this, go write some yourself, you lazy sod.
Message for the OOC Police: Yeah, point taken - so write some yourself and
show me how it should be done.
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I loved you. I *love* you. Maybe now, as the oceans begin to boil dry, it's finally safe to admit to that. What entity would be watching for one demon's sinless thought at a time such as this?
Maybe it was safe to admit my love the second that bastard took you away from me. If no one, nothing, spotted how much it hurt to know I'd lost you forever, they would not, could not, have picked up on a mere admission of love. When I knew I'd never have the chance to hold you and be held by you, to see every emotion I've ever felt reflected in your eyes, I thought my pain would cripple every creature near me. As usual, I was wrong.
He needed only one bucket of Holy Water to obliterate the reason I Fell. Did you know that? Did even part of you suspect that I was too pathetic to choose my own side? Not that I saw any difference between them, save for the fact that you were on one and so weren't on the other. Of course, now neither side has you any more.
As far as I know, that is.
Where *do* we go when we die? Heaven? Not you, not me. Hell? I looked for you there. So do we live on in children's dreams and bored housewives' fantasies? Or are we nothing at all? Oblivion can't scare me then: not if it's the side where I'll now find you.
And still my thoughts turn back to that bastard…
He and his angel postponed today's battle for a while. Do you think they suspected, as they danced so prettily around each other's feelings, that it would take fewer than a hundred years for the course of events to right itself? Do you think they would have cared, knowing that all the delay would cost them was a few minutes with the first Antichrist and the death of the one being I didn't believe I could exist without?
I don't care who wins today, Ligur: I'm still counting the seconds from the moment I knew I'd lost.
---Fin---