A/N: *crawls out of hole* here have another shitty experiment. also is this the crash and burn WCC we just don't know
If there's a god, could He please just show up?
Please, god, if you can hear me, kill me now. I don't think I can survive in here much longer. I can't see or move and there are weird tubes and I'm scared. I don't know how long I've been in here. How am I alive? How long has it been? I can't even remember what outside looks like.
This place is hell. I signed up for hell. Stupid, stupid, stupid, why didn't you believe them? Why didn't you fight back when they shoved you in here? Why didn't you do anything? Why didn't you back out after the first volunteer never came back? Stupid. If you'd just thought for a second, you wouldn't be in this mess. But you didn't because you thought it'd be fun and now look you're going to die alone, forgotten and unloved.
That's why they accepted, you know. Because you're a nobody. Easy to get rid of. Stupid, all of you were! You and everyone else in that group were nobodies that no one outside would remember if they disappeared. That's why. Useless, worthless members of the city. That's why they wanted you, offered the job to you, said that the volunteer work would end up getting you money. Well, was it worth it? Was money really fucking worth it?
Wait, wh- the box is moving...moving? Is something lifting me? Hey! Let me out! Hey! Can anyone hear me? Put me down and let me out! I'm still alive, please help me. Get me out of here! Please, someone, anyone!
"The Vital Apparatus Vent will deliver a Companion Cube in three, two, one..."
And, oh god I'm being dropped, and what if the cube breaks and- or...no, I'm floating? Something caught me...? There's a muffled sound, like a buzz. What is that? No wait, there's footsteps- someone's carrying me. Someone carrying ...someone alive! Hey, you, person! Help! Can you hear me? I gotta try to move, gotta kick the sides of the box-! Hey, hey, please, give me some sign you can hear me, person!
"The Enrichment Center reminds you that the Companion Cube will never threaten to stab you and, in fact, cannot speak. In the event that the Companion Cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice."
Wha...that voice is wrong! I won't stab you, person. I don't even have a knife, let alone the strength to even try to stab you. And I can speak. I can! Can't you hear me? Hello! This is me, speaking! Hellooooo! And y-you know, person, you should listen to me. This place is dangerous, is hell. That voice'll try and kill you. Can you hear me? You gotta listen to me if you can; don't trust that voice, it's lying.
Person...?
I'm moving around a lot, and things are bouncing off my cube...they sound like bullets...are you doing that? Are you using me to block those? Not that I'm offended; total opposite, in fact, I just...well, I'm happy to know I can help you, even if you can't hear me. What did the voice call me- a Weighted Companion Cube, right? Seems I'm living up to the name...
I wonder what you're like, person. How'd you get stuck down here? Are you a scientist? A employee? A doctor? Some full time worker? You seem pretty smart, since you haven't died yet. And you seem kind too. You caught me when I fell, and now you're sitting on me and I can hear you patting me. I wish I could feel that. It's been so long.
I wonder what you look like. I bet you are beautiful.
Oh, we're moving again, alright. Where are we going? I mean, not that it matters much, but where are we- oh, you've s-stopped walking. Are you okay, person? Do you need to sit? I'm here to be a seat if you need, I guess. Don't overwork yourself!
"You did it! The Weighted Companion Cube certainly brought you good luck."
Person?
"However, it cannot accompany you for the rest of the test and, unfortunately, must be euthanized. Please escort your Companion Cube to the Aperture Science Emergency Intelligence Incinerator."
What...euthanized? Emergency intelligence incinerator?! Don't incinerators burn stuff? Oh god, I don't want to be burned! Person, don't do it. The voice is lying; you can keep going with me. It'll be fine. We're supposed to stick together, right? I'm a Weighted Companion Cube, it's in my name. How can I be a companion if I'm dead?
Funny, to think not a hour ago I was wishing for death...
"While it has been a faithful companion, your Companion Cube simply cannot accompany you through the rest of the test. If it could talk - and the Enrichment Center takes this opportunity to remind you that it cannot - it would tell you to go on without it, because it would rather die in a fire than become a burden to you."
No, no I wouldn't rather die, the voice is lying! I'm sorry, person, but I want to be a burden- goddamn it, I want to live! I want to see outside again. I want to see you! And meet you and talk and have adventures outside of this place! Please don't put me in there.
Oh, oh, you're setting me down, and sitting next to me...are y-you crying? Please don't cry, person. There's no need to cry. Because we are both leaving this place together. I swear. Neither of us is gonna get incinerated anytime soon. I promise. Please stop crying...oh god I wish I could hug you...
"Although the euthanizing process is remarkably painful, eight out of ten Aperture Science engineers believe that the Companion Cube is most likely incapable of feeling much pain."
Well, I don't want to find out! And shut up, voice. You're not gonna get my person to euthanize me faster or whatever it is you think you're trying to do. Since I'm not getting incinerated. So just...just shut up and let's agree to not find out if I'm incapable of much pain.
"The Companion Cube cannot continue through the testing. State and kicks statutory regulations prohibit it from simply remaining here, alone and companionless. You must euthanize it."
Shut up shut up shut up! The voice is lying, it's tricking you, don't listen! God, person, if you can hear me please don't do this. I don't want to die. I want to help you get out of here. I know you can get out of here. And I want to help you and go with you and just please don't do this.
"Destroy your Companion Cube or testing cannot continue."
No! Don...y-you're picking me up with the buzzing thing. You're moving. What are you doing? Have you found a escape route? I bet you did, you smarty. I knew you could. You're really great that way. Ah, does it feel warmer to you...? That's not...right...why is it so hot?
No. No. You're not- I thought we were friends! Partners! Don't do this, please don't do this, I don't want to die! Help, please, just break open the cube and get me out of here. Just get me out of here! Help! Get me out of he-
"You euthanized your faithful Companion Cube faster than any other test subject on record. Well done."