Chapter One: Random Stupidity

Disclaimer: I do not wish/or really do own anything Harry Potter-ish. Besides my books. Which really aren't my work. So that was stupid. Oh well. You get the point.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I can't stay with one thing at once, I know. This fic is about Lupin and his troubles of being a werewolf and such. This is the random stupid chapter, there is OOC, I warn you, and random stupidity, as stated twice before. I will add more chapters to this, but they will be about different situations. This is kind of a bunch of one-shots put together. This chapter is three one-shots put together. Aaand, the first one-shot thing is inspired totally by my good friend Fluffy! So yeah. Hope you like it. And I hope you REVIEW. Oh, and I will be updatingchapter two for A Life's Debtvery soon!- Padfoot

Remus was flipping through the Daily Prophet when a certain article caught his eye. It was about…

"A new Anti-Werewolf Legislation?" Sirius read over his shoulder, walking into the kitchen and getting the orange juice out of the refrigerator. "I've been wondering when the Ministry would start that up… I mean, working for a werewolf! Or even with one! The horror!"

Lupin shot him a look. "Just tell me you're kidding."

Sirius looked at him seriously. "Of course I'm not. Half-breeds should be locked up!" He laughed softly to himself, and then, when he realized that his friend was not laughing with him, he shut up and told him that he had nothing against werewolves, of course.

"It's was issued last night by," he read more into the article, "Delores Umbridge. You know what?" He didn't wait for Sirius to reply. "I'm going to go to the Ministry right now to give that woman a piece of my mind." He stood up as if he was going right then.

Sirius looked at him disbelievengly. "Did you ever listen to your mother? Never go rampaging into the Ministry of Magic before breakfast!"

Remus sat back down. His face fell. "Pass me a glass."

And so Remus Lupin and Sirius Black sat silently at the kitchen table, drinking their orange juice and thinking of the best way to attack Delores Umbridge for her injustice against half-breeds.

They had agreed that apparating to the Ministry was simply the easiest way to get there. When they arrived, however, there were signs everywhere labeled "NO WEREWOLVES – By Order of the Ministry of Magic." These made Lupin feel even more uncomfortable.

"This is really weird," was all he had to say.

As people were pouring into the giant room to go to their daily jobs—there was a group of at least five people just standing in a corner under a giant "NO WEREWOLVES" sign.

"Yeah," agreed Sirius. "Hey—I wonder why those guys are just standing there." So Sirius pulled Lupin all the way over to where the people were standing.

It turned out that the "NO WEREWOLVES" fliers had some fine print.

"Sorry Moony," Sirius sighed. "But this sign here says that all werewolves must be tied up at this post while their owners are at the Ministry."

"What!"

"Sorry, but it's the rules." Sirius then pulled a long piece of rope out of his pocket and tied it around the werewolf's neck, then tied the other end tightly around the wooden post where other people were tied up.

"But—You can't just leave me here!" Lupin called after him as he walked away.

A little boy poked Lupin in the leg. "Yes he can." He said quietly. "It's the rules. I came to work with my mummy today and she tied me up."

"That's nice," Lupin tried to get as far away from the little boy as he possibly could. He ended up standing next to another man a few years older then himself.

"Hey," was all the man said before looking away.

Remus Lupin had never sunk so low before. To be tied up at a pole in a public area was probably one of his worst experiences. (Apart from the incident in the Forbidden Forest with the fox… but that's a different story.)

It was getting harder and harder for Remus to find a job, but he still needed one and was still looking. There was a current opening for a bartender in one of the bars in Diagon Alley. So, Lupin thought he might check it out.

The woman serving people at the counter gave him a packet of papers to fill out before he could get interviewed for the job.

"Just fill it out and give it back to me later—it's just kind of personality questions and stuff," she wasn't a great help.

The questions were pretty easy, just things like… what are your views on the current muggle protection rights… why do you want this job… the packet went on and on. He ordered just a water, as he was working on the packet right there in the bar, and continued on.

However, when he was halfway through with the questions, there was a question he just had to stop and stare at.

57. Are you in any way assoiated with werewolves?

Oh great, he thought to himself. He knew that he wouldn't be able to answer that question. He would have to put yes, but if he did, he wouldn't be able to get the job.

Remus just stood up, took his packet, and threw it away in the trash can. He didn't really want to be a bartender anyway.

Being a werewolf. He thought. It sucks.

Knock, Knock, Knock.

So Lord Voldemort was back and it was Remus Lupin's job to inform as many people as possible about his return without the Ministry figuring out the Order of the Phoenix's plot. Remus's suggustion was to stop door-to-door, and, since he was the one who pointed this idea out, it was he who would get to try it first.

A middle-aged woman answered the door, "Hello?" She asked skeptically, clearly not expecting anyone to knock on her door that day.

"Yes, Hello, my name is Remus Lupin," he introduced himself, "I was just going to ask you—do you read the Daily Prophet on a daily basis?"

"Er.. when I get around to it, yes," she answered, still looking puzzled. "May I ask why you are here?"

"I'd like to talk to you," explained Lupin, "Your front poarch will be fine, it's only for a few minutes."

The woman agreed, and offered him one of her chairs on the fornt poarch in front of her home for him to sit in. And so Remus began to tell her about the return of the Dark Wizard to her the best way that he possibly could.

She took it all very well and respected him and what he had to say. She claimed that she did always doubt that Voldemort really was gone, and now she really does believe that he is back. The woman agreed to tell her friends and family about it; but then, when Remus was just about to leave, she seemed to remember something.

"You're that werewolf that was in the Daily Prophet a few weeks ago, aren't you?" she asked him, and his face fell. That was an unfortunate article towards the back of the paper.

He gulped. "Yes," admitted Lupin.

She stood up so abruptly that it startled him. "Well, then I don't believe anything that you just told me!" she yelled. "You're one of those half-breed freaks that talks nothing but lies! Go! Get away from my house!"

And so with that, Remus ran from her yard until he was sure that he was a good distance from her.

Well, he told himself as he began walking back to Grimmuald Place, I think that went well.

You read it—You loved it—Now review it!

Told you it was dumb. - Paddy