Welcome to My Humble Home
By: Zero_Starlight
With a ding and a whir of machinery, the elevator doors slid smoothly open, and a unicorn colt poked his head out.
Looking around the small room, his charcoal black mane falling slightly in the way of his liquid magma coloured eyes, he tentatively called out.
"Zero? Where are you man?"
The colt nearly collided with the ceiling when a voice called out from a corridor off to the side.
"I'm in here Sharky!"
Following Zero's voice, his hooves click-clacking along the smooth stone floor, he soon found himself in a large room, split into two halves.
The left halve featured a stone fireplace, and a variety of comfortable chairs. What caught Sharky's eye and made the author in him gasp, was the sight of the floor to ceiling bookshelves, filled with hundreds of thousands of tomes, a few battered volumes as thick as an average sized tree trunk. Indeed, quite a few seemed to be made of actual tree trunks.
The other halve of the room was made up of a row of furnaces and chests, and a workbench that sat beneath a warm light, saws, hammers, screwdrivers and quite a few tools that Sharky did not know the names of hanging from recesses on the bench.
On the left side of the room stood Zero Starlight, his mirrored aviator goggles hanging around his neck, a cigarette hanging from the corner of his mouth, and a bemused expression on his face.
Zero had yet to notice him, and Sharky took a moment to look him over. Zero was usually in a perpetual state of motion, so it was harder than most would think to go over the finer details.
He was about the size of Sharky, if the latter was to stand on his hind-hooves, a feat reserved mainly for Pinkie Pie's personal use, and his hair was jet black, with pure white creating a ring around his head. He wore baggy black cargo pants, a grey t-shirt, and padded his way around the library area in socked feet.
Sharky coughed lightly, and Zero snapped his focus to him. He grinned at the colt, and tapped the page of the book that floated above the deep black and purple pedestal. The book closed with a rustle of old parchment, and Sharky could have sworn he saw strange white sigils floating into the book from the surrounding shelves.
"It's good to see you buddy!"
Sharky smiled at this. Zero was one of the only humans left in Equestria, but he didn't let that effect his attitude. He was perpetually excited and always happy to help others. Come to think of it, Sharky couldn't think of any time Zero hadn't gone out of his way to help somepony else.
"So, how's Red Heart?" Zero asked, motioning Sharky over to one of the comfortable chairs.
"She's good. She wanted to come along today, but she got called in for an extra shift at the last minute." Sharky replied.
"Another extra one? Jeez... she had better be getting paid for overtime." Zero said, a slightly confused look dominating his expression.
Sharky sighed at this, "You know how she is. Never accepting extra pay..." He noted a Cheshire cat grin spreading across Zero's face. "What?"
"You pop the question yet?" Zero's grin grew wider still at Sharky's flustered reply.
"Come on man! Why can't you just leave me alone about that?"
Zero shrugged, palms up in a gesture that said, isn't it obvious?
"It's fun and, frankly, kinda hilarious."
Sharky pointed an accusing hoof at Zero.
"I don't see you proposing to Twilight!"
"I'm also not sleeping with her." Zero pointed out. "Yet..." He added as an afterthought, a smirk on his face.
Sharky threw his hooves up into the air and let out a snort of annoyance.
"You're impossible, you know that? Whatever. What did you call me here for anyway? I hope it wasn't just to take jabs at my ego. AGAIN. If so, I'm leaving, I have a two metric tons worth of rap recordings that are just begging to be worked through."
Zero laughed, and stood up, motioning for Sharky to follow him.
"Come on. We can talk as we walk."
Sharky opened his mouth to protest, but closed it as Zero turned the corner and disappeared into the next room. He sighed, before getting up and galloping quickly after Zero.
"Zero! Where are you going! Hey! Wait up!" Sharky called. Following Zero was beginning to exhaust him, and it didn't help that Zero was always just disappearing from his sight. It was ridiculous, to say the least, he specialized in rapping, not running around. That was Zero's speciality. Along with advanced particle physics, astronomy, botany, nuclear dispersal research, applied quantum breakage... Lava shook his head, the list was far to long for him to go on, and if he didn't watch where he was going he'd just end up running into a-
*Wham!*
...wall. Cradling his muzzle in his hooves, Sharky called out.
"Zero! Wait up! I fink my snout is bwoken!"
Zero leaned around the corner of the hall, an eyebrow cocked at the unicorn.
"Don't wook at meh like dat. If you hadn't been going so fast, I whouldn't 'ave run into dat wall."
Zero responded with barely controlled laughter, barely controlled being snorts and coughs attempting to cover up the chuckling.
"Wats so funneh?" Sharky asked, his nose still cradled in his hands. At this, Zero gave up and rolled on the floor laughing, tears streaming down his face.
"Say," He paused to laugh again, "Say, Mary Had A Little Lamb." Zero prompted, attempting to control himself while Sharky repeated the phrase.
"Bawy had a widdle Wamb."
"Are we there yet? I've had enough of the immaturity you're showing me here." Sharky complained, glaring at Zero, who was peering intently through a pane of glass into a darkened room. Shaking his head, he continued on, giving Sharky no reply.
"Wait up man! Seriously, where are we going?" But Zero had already disappeared into the darkness.
"Zero! Zero...?"
He stumbled into a door, and felt around for a handle, pulling it open and entering. The door swung shut behind him, plunging him into deep darkness. He thought he heard a rustling and suddenly the lights came on, revealing a...
Giant cake?
"What...?" Was all that Sharky could think to say, and he felt it was a fairly good question.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHARKY!" Yelled Pinkie Pie, the party planner having exploded in a flurry of icing, sparkles, streamers, and a small orchestra from the cake.
With a flourish, the band began a very energetic rendition of happy birthday, and from behind the cake came the population of Ponyville, singing along.
Well, most of Ponyville, that is. Ditzy had decided to be the 1% and simply barrel through the cake, a large chocolate chip muffin clutched to her chest.
"INCOMING MUFFINS! :3" Ditzy yelled, vanilla icing trailing behind her as she stopped dead in front of Sharky and bowed, presenting the muffin as if it was a holy object.
"Ummm... thanks?" Sharky said, still quite stunned.
"Don't question it, just eat the muffin and smile." Zero said, leaning beside the light switch near the door.
Sharky stared for a moment, lifted the muffin to his mouth, and without moving his gaze, took a bite.
"Let's get this party started!" Pinkie yelled, as she and Zen broke into song.
"Welcome to the planet... Welcome to existence... Everyone's here, everyone's here, everybody's watching you now, everybody waits for you now... What happens next? What happens next? I dare you to move!"
"I dare you to move! I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor, I dare you to move, I dare you to move, like to today never happened, today never happened before..."
"Welcome to the fallout... Welcome to resistance... The tension is here, tension is here, between who you are and who you could be... Between how it is and how it should be, yeah, I dare you to move!"
"I dare you to move! I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor, I dare you to move, I dare you to move, like to today never happened, today never happened before..."
"Maybe redemption has stories to tell, maybe forgiveness is right where you fell... Where can you run to escape from yourself? Where you gonna go? Where you gonna go? Salvation is here!"
"I dare you to move! I dare you to move! I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor, I dare you to move, I dare you to move, like to today never happened, today never happened, today never happened, today never happened before..."
"Enjoy the party dear?" Red Heart asked, leaning in and planting a kiss on Sharky's cheek.
"Yeah. Can't believe I actually forgot about my own birthday..." Sharky replied, nuzzling up against Red Heart.
"Oh for cryin' out loud, get a room you two!" Zero put a hand to his chin, looking thoughtful, "Actually, I think I have a room open over in the west end of the facility..."
Twilight gave Zero a shove, "Come on Zero, it's Sharky's birthday, cut him some slack today, please?"
Zero rolled his eyes and planted a kiss on her cheek. "Whatever you say Twi." Twilight giggled. "Seriously though, Sharky, Happy Birthday." Zero said, grabbing two drinks from the bar, nodding his thanks to Shaken Stirred. He passed one drink to Sharky, keeping the Strawberry Daiquiri for himself. He held his glass up in cheers.
"To Sharky. The one stallion who can put up with me." He took a regulated sip of his drink while Sharky downed his own.
"Light weight." Sharky jabbed as he finished his drink, signalling for another.
"You ever try one of these things? They're as cold as all get out." Zero pulled a cigarette from his back pocket and lit it. He took a drag and blew the smoke out.
"I thought I told you to stop smoking." Twilight said, regarding Zero's cigarette with disdain. "They will kill you."
Zero shrugged. "Old habits die hard."
Twilight gave him a look. "You don't have old habits to remember."
Zero smirked. "Point." He took the cigarette and tossed it into a nearby trash can, the contents of which spontaneously combusted, causing a small column of flames to burst out. "Consider me done."
"Your pockets beeping, by the way." Sharky pointed out.
"So it is." Zero replied, pulling out his cell, and tapped a few buttons. He sighed.
"What's up?" Twilight asked, having noted his sudden change in attitude.
"Oh, nothing really. Just someone cashing in a favour." He shrugged. "Sorry Sharky, but I gotta bounce. I owe this guy, and I don't go back on my promises."
Sharky nodded. "It's cool. Hey-" He put a hoof on Zero's hand. "Thanks for throwing me this party. You can be one hell of an ass sometimes, but you always do right."
Zero smiled, and turned to Twilight. "Think you can hold down the fort for me? I told Shake n Stirred to close the bar at two, but I really doubt that will stop Pinkie."
Twilight laughed and leaned in, placing a kiss on Zero's cheek. "Sure thing. Love you."
"Love you too. Later." And with that, Zero walked away. Twilight turned to Sharky and Redheart.
"Well, I'm going to find a nice, quiet place to read for a bit, but if you need anything, let me know." Twilight headed for a nearby door.
Redheart twisted and turned to face Sharky. "So... Zero told me you were planning to ask me something...?"
END
Authors Note: *Devious Smirk* Anyway! A early Birthday present for my friend Sharky, as I will be unable to post when his actual birthday comes around. I hope you enjoyed it buddy, and I hope you enjoy your special day. We all love you. Some in more ways than others. *Looks pointedly at mare form of Red* Remember to comment, favourite and give him tons of love, and I'll see you in the future. Zero out, BOOP!