PART 1:

July.

11:00 PM. (Electric Factory)

As the crowd moved slowly toward the exit doors, Blaine bounced on his heels and squeezed Santana's hand. "That was amazing! I can't believe that astronaut costume! And I can't believe he stripped down to those little white boxers. Seriously Santana, best 30th birthday present ever."

Santana couldn't help but grin broadly at Blaine's unfettered enthusiasm. "It was quite a show. I loved the dancers for Big Girl; I mean damn, that's not usually my... Blaine? Hellooo, earth to Blaine."

Blaine had slowed almost to a stop, craning his head to peer above the people in front of them. He started when Santana smacked his arm. "Oh, sorry! See those two guys up there, waiting for the light to change? I know that guy on the left. I mean, I don't know him, but I think he's a lawyer. I see him in Family Court all the time. He's so gorgeous, gah."

"You sure you don't mean the tall, muscular, ridiculously handsome guy on the right? Seriously, that guy could be a model. If I liked dick, I'd be all over that."

"Eh, he's so generic," Blaine shrugged.

"Do you want to say hi? I mean, in a second it's going to be awkward, if you don't."

Blaine made a decision, and grabbing Santana's hand, he pulled her toward them. When he reached the guys, he dropped Santana's hand and touched the arm of the one on the left, saying, "Hi there, excuse me, but don't I know you?"

The man turned, a bit startled, and then a look of recognition passed over his face and he smiled broadly at Blaine. "Oh, yes! I've seen you around Family Court, right?" Blaine nodded, and the man went on, "I'm Kurt Hummel, I clerk for Judge Parker."

"Ah, that makes sense. Blaine Anderson, I'm with Legal Services," he said, grinning like an idiot.

Kurt gestured to the man next to him.

"This is my husband, Jack," Kurt offered. Jack donned the weakest of smiles and nodded, looking bored.

Oh.

"It's nice to meet you, Jack," Blaine offered, making a valiant effort to hide his disappointment.

Jack nodded again with another fake smile, and then clasped Kurt's hand, gesturing with his head in the direction they had been heading. Blaine wondered if Jack was mute, or just supremely rude.

"We've got to run, but we should have lunch sometime," Kurt said, starting to walk across the street, being practically dragged along by Jack, "I'll call your office!"

Blaine waved and turned to Santana, who shrugged and said, "Maybe you can salvage this with a threesome?"

"Oh for goodness sakes, Santana. Not everything is about sex. He seems... cool."

"Uh huh."

August.

From: Kurt Hummel
To: Blaine Anderson
Subject: Lunch

Let's have some.

KH

From: Blaine Anderson
To: Kurt Hummel
Subject: Re: Lunch

oh gosh, i'd love to, kurt, but i'm really busy this week. maybe next week?

blaine

From: Kurt Hummel
To: Blaine Anderson
Subject: Re: Lunch

Ok, I'm holding you to that.

From: Blaine Anderson
To: Kurt Hummel
Subject: Re: Lunch

you do that. ;)

by the way, how about that homophobic client of mine this morning? i did not see that coming; you'd think he would've noticed he hired a gay attorney; i mean, i'm not exactly inconspicuous. and i love judge parker. "my dad says mean stuff about my mom and calls her mean names." "what names does he call her?" "i don't want to say; it's a bad word." "can you tell me the first letter?" "g." "g? i think you're going to have to give me a little more than that, kiddo..." she was sooo patient.

p.s. it's pretty sad that there are still kids who think "gay" is a bad word.

From: Kurt Hummel
To: Blaine Anderson
Subject: Re: Lunch

I know! I was so impressed with how you handled it. Very suave.

From: Blaine Anderson
To: Kurt Hummel
Subject: Re: Lunch

oh stop, you'll make me blush.

From: Kurt Hummel
To: Blaine Anderson
Subject: Re: Lunch

;)

September.

Friday.

1:00 PM. (Green Eggs Café)

Blaine swirled his fingers along the outside of his water glass, making patterns in the condensation, and took another in a series of deep breaths. "Just be cool," he thought to himself, straightening the already straight silverware on his napkin, "it's just lunch." He was fidgeting with his bow tie when he glanced up again, and then there was Kurt, walking briskly through the cafe doors. Blaine waved and smiled, resisting the urge to stand up and pull out Kurt's chair. "This is not a date," he silently chastised himself, "Stop being ridiculous."

"Sorry I'm late, Judge Parker wanted me to go over the afternoon list with her again," Kurt said as he slid into his chair and tugged at the light scarf around his neck. It was unseasonably warm for September in Philadelphia. "In other words, she wanted to make sure she can move through the cases quickly enough to be able leave by about 3:00 today." Kurt rolled his eyes and shrugged good-naturedly, "Must be nice, right? Meanwhile, I'll be there until 5:00, prepping Monday's cases."

"Well, when you're a judge, you'll have a brilliant law clerk who outlines all of your cases, and you'll be the one leaving early for the weekend."

Kurt's eyes crinkled as he laughed. "Me? No thank you. I could not wear the same old robe every day. Besides, I don't have the patience for that level of frustration. You, on the other hand... dealing with all the craziness of free legal services, day in and day out? I think you're more judge material."

"Me? Nah. I'm more into mediation and negotiation. You know, helping parents to set aside their anger and spite, and focus on making the best decisions for their kids, hopefully in a way that makes everyone comfortable. That's the most satisfying part of the job for me. Judges don't have the time to try to soothe or please anyone, let alone everyone. And I don't really have an authoritarian bone in my body."

Kurt smirked at Blaine, unconvinced, and said, "I don't know, Blaine, you always seem pretty damn in control in my courtroom."

"Well, I'm nothing if not a performer," Blaine admitted with a grin, and then realized something. "Wait, you've watched me? I mean, I know you're in and out of the courtroom sometimes, but..."

"Of course I have," Kurt said, with a dismissive wave of hand. "Everybody knows Blaine Anderson gives great oral argument," he added with a wink.

Blaine giggled – giggled! And then went for his water, feeling pleased and a little bit bashful. He took a long sip, and when he looked back up he saw Kurt's face had broken into an easy smile. "Well, in any case, I could never run for judge. The internet makes things way too easy to find."

"Oh, really! How scandalous." Kurt leaned his elbow on the table and rested his chin on his hand, "Tell me everything."

"I have to maintain some kind of mystery, Kurt, or you'll grow bored with me and move on to someone younger," Blaine said, quoting Camp, batting his eyelashes and donning an innocent expression.

"You know I'm going to Google you the moment you're out of my sight, right?"

Blaine groaned.

"So, a performer, ay?" Kurt said, letting him off the hook for the moment. "Tell me more about that. I bet you were that guy who got the lead in all the high school shows, right?"

"Well..."

3:00 PM.

Blaine scowled at his phone, which was open to a blank text message. In the hour since he and Kurt had parted, he had composed and deleted half a dozen texts, but had thus far managed to restrain himself from sending one. He was utterly captivated by Kurt, with whom it turned out he had much in common, including their high school theater/glee club backgrounds, and queer activism in college leading to an interest in advocacy, and, as such, law school. But Kurt, though flirtatious as ever, was still wearing his wedding band, and married is married. Right? Right. Blaine told himself that he wouldn't initiate any texting conversations, and resolved that he definitely would not flirt with him anymore, unless Kurt gave him some indication he wasn't as romantically attached and unavailable as he appeared.

Lost in these thoughts, Blaine startled when his phone buzzed in his hand.

K: My judge just left to go to Ross. Inexcusable shopping choice. And why I still need to be here is a mystery.

B: and an injustice, kurt. shall i grab my superhero cape?

K: And come rescue me? ;)

B: of course.

Well, ok, maybe a little flirting was harmless.

5:00 PM.

K: I've finally been sprung from this joint - hallelujah. When are you next in court?

B: i was just thinking of calling it quits for the week as well. let's see, monday morning i have a child support conference.
B: what are you up to this weekend? my friends are going to gay bingo tomorrow night (question: what is better than drag queens on roller-skates? answer: nothing.) and then out afterwards to tavern on camac.

K: This weekend? This weekend is my 15 yr high school reunion.
K: Catholic school. I keep "forgetting" about it. My best friend from high school, Rachel, is coming in from New York and making me go because she's afraid to go alone. God help me.
K: No pun intended.
K: And no, I'm not Catholic (and Rachel is Jewish – long story), but when I was chased out of public school by a homophobic jerk, it was less expensive than other private schools in NJ.

B: oh wow, that sucks. um. well, i went with a friend to her 10th hs reunion last year as her date - her husband stayed home with the kids. it was fun!
B: but it also wasn't my school... or a catholic school. (i'm guessing your reunion won't have an open bar?)

K: Yeah no. We are leaving our spouses home as well. I think I'm blocking it out of my mind until tomorrow night. I need to figure out what the hell I'm going to wear...

B: maybe you should wear a catholic schoolgirl uniform. you like plaid. (yes, i noticed your spec case.)

K: Blaine!

B: i'm teasing! (kind of. i really think you could rock a kilt.) but anyway, i'm sure you can wear anything - people will be in jeans.

K: No plaid skirts! Maybe on Halloween. I'm going to wear some tight ass jeans, for sure.

B: ok, now you're the one teasing!

K: ;)
K: Ok ok I'm going home now - behave yourself this weekend!

B: you too! have fun at the reunion.

K: I'll try. Hopefully being back there won't give me any surges of teenaged angst.

B: just remember, you're a big bad lawyer now ;)

K: Ok coach, I'll keep that in mind.

Saturday.

8:00 PM. (Gay BINGO)

K: Shoot me.

B: that good, huh?

K: Everyone here is awful, and some girl is trying to pick me up. She's telling me how she thinks the All-State commercials "with the black guy" are insightful as far as the current economy. I'm in a circle of hell.
K: What a waste of a good outfit.

B: wow that sounds dreadful. what did you end up wearing?

K: Plaid skirt, white oxford knotted at midriff and thigh highs.
K: I'm kidding - Tight jeans, tight black shirt. Boots.

B: kurt!
B: the only way that could have been better is if you had whispered it to me instead of texting it. ;)

K: Troublemaker!

B: me?!
B: you're the one describing your sinful outfit choices.

K: True ;)

"Earth to Blaine," Santana said, snapping her fingers in front of his face, "Up on the table!"

"W-what?" Blaine sputtered, looking around and seeing all eyes were on him.

A drag queen with a huge pink wig and matching pink leg warmers rolled up to Blaine on her skates. "We called O-69, and youuuu forgot to stand up and fake an orgasm! Up on the table, honey, and give us all a one-man show!"

"Oh, fuck."

11:30 PM. (Tavern On Camac)

B: did you survive?

K: Barely. And I mean barely.

B: come shake it off?

K: I'm at my Dad's in New Jersey.

B: well, that's not very far away! come sing with meee! :)

K: Ha! How's Tavern?

B: hot, sweaty, crowwded, booooozy... good piano player tonight! he's doing a disney medley right now. kuuurt, i wanna beeeeee a part of your woooooorld.

K: Oh boy, you're a mess! The Little Mermaid? Really? And how do you know I still sing?

B: because your voice is just soooo lovely kurt, and it would just be soooo wrong if you've given up singing. please tell me you sing, kurt. kuuurt. please.

K: Well, since you said "please."

B: i need to hear you sing.

K: We'll see. ;)

B: Kuuuuurttt come singgg!

Sunday.

9:00 AM.

Blaine stirred and squeezed his eyes tightly before squinting them open a few millimeters to investigate how much it was going to hurt to open them fully.

It wasn't too bad, but he was definitely hung over. He reached over to his nightstand and grabbed for the bottle of water, congratulating himself for being smart enough to place it there before he passed out last night. After a couple of swallows he replaced the cap, rested the bottle along the back of his neck, and reached for his phone.

Re-reading the texts from last night, he felt a twinge of embarrassment that he had all but begged Kurt to come out. He shook his head at himself before realizing shaking his head was a bad idea. Queasy, he pulled the top sheet up over his head and went back to sleep.

3:00 PM.

K: Wanna visit me in chambers tomorrow morning after your child support hearing?
K: Sadly there will be no fetishy costume get-ups there, only boring work clothes.
K: Unless you count the Judge's robe, but she'll probably be wearing it.

B: yes of course i want to visit, there is nothing boring about your work clothes, and the robe totally counts. :) my hearing is at 9:00, so i'll text after.

K: Excellent. How are you? Did you have fun last night?

B: the roller-skating drag queens were pretty spectacular, and i ran into a bunch of my undergrad friends out at tavern. and, i'm mostly recovered from a wicked hangover. did you have anything resembling fun?

K: Aw, poor puppy. :( I would say my night was a little more repressive than fun, but I was on friendship duty, so it's ok. I don't know what would have helped except perhaps copious amounts of liquor and a total change of population - more hot guidos, fewer bloated vanilla suburbanites.

B: ha! well, a state of altered consciousness generally makes uncomfortable situations more bearable. social lubricant, as they say.

K: Yeah, there was nothing lubed about last night. Everything about it was painful, and not in a good way ;)
K: It's ok though. I'm about to go recover with a nap and a shower.

B: naps & showers are nice, but i always prefer a bath after a painful situation.

K: I was just about to clarify that I was probably going to take a bath instead, but I didn't want to over-text.

B: over-texting is acceptable if it's about you being hot, wet, and naked.

K: What a filthy mouth! I see I'm going to have to keep an eye on you.

B: i think i'm going to like being kept an eye on.
B: and besides, you're clearly in possession of quite the dirty mind yourself.

K: Me? Nah, I am as pure as the driven snow, I assure you.

B: your fingers are crossed behind your back.

K: And toes.

B: of course.

Monday.

8:48 AM.

Sweating beneath his too-heavy coat, Blaine balanced his dripping umbrella and briefcase in one hand while keying in the code to the attorney lounge with the other. All the while his phone was ringing incessantly in his pocket.

Before he could finish pressing in the last number, the door opened inward, and a short female attorney in an unfortunately shoulder-padded orange skirt suit and enormous frizzy red hair greeted Blaine with a "Happy Monday!" as she stepped aside to let him in and skipped out, the heavy door thudding shut behind her.

Seeing he was alone, Blaine dropped his briefcase on the couch, shrugged out of his heavy coat, and hung it, along with his umbrella, on the coat rack to dry. Surveying the damage to his hair in the closet mirror, he dug for his phone that had begun to ring again, answering, "What can I do for you, Santana?"

9:17 AM.

B: i look like a drowned rat!

K: Me too - this weather is insane. It's September Blaine, and I'm sweating. I hate sweating.
K: What room are you in?

B: well, i was over in the support unit, but neither the opposing party nor the opposing counsel are here yet, and one of my colleagues is stuck bc of a tree on the train tracks, so i'm going to babysit her client in cr c.

K: Well that's nice of you.
K: BTW I have the most trashy of litigants fighting in my hallway.

B: rainy days & mondays...

9:31 AM.

K: Just stuck my head into C didn't see you.

B: maybe you didn't recognize me bc of the drowned rat look i'm sporting in lieu of my usual dapper appearance.
B: or it could be bc i was back in support. :) i got an agreement, so i'm finished and going to the attorney lounge... or to you... are you in chambers?

K: Come see me in my courtroom. Judge P isn't here yet. Shocker.

Blaine walked straight through the waiting area for Courtroom B, smiling and nodding politely at attorneys scattered around the room amongst the litigants, but heading purposefully for the courtroom door. The room was full of scowls and dripping umbrellas, and he did not want to be pulled into a conversation with another attorney right now. He slipped through the door and pulled it shut behind him.

"Hey there, mister," Kurt called out from behind a pile of files next to the Judge's chair.

Blaine couldn't help the wide grin that spread across his face. "Hey yourself. How are you on this beautiful morning?" he said, jokingly. He strode up the center aisle and hopped up onto the table on the plaintiffs' side, leaning back in a stretch, his feet dangling below.

Kurt chuckled and replied, "Glad I keep an extra pair of shoes under my desk, or I'd have been sloshing around with wet feet all day." Seemingly finished with organizing the morning's files, Kurt stepped down off the bench, but stayed behind the waist-high barrier between them.

"How far is your walk?" Blaine asked.

"Only ten minutes or so, but it's far enough in this weather."

"How is it you walked ten minutes in this downpour and still look flawless?"

"Oh, stop," Kurt scolded, but Blaine could tell he was pleased.

Blaine couldn't help himself... "Stop? You sure that's what you want?"

Blaine drew in a deep breath as Kurt's surprised eyes locked his.

"Blaine Anderson, what am I going to do with you?" Kurt breathed out.

Blaine ducked his chin down and cocked his head to the side, looking up at Kurt through his long eyelashes, and unconsciously licked his lips. "What do you want to do with me?"

9:53 AM.

B: fuck this, i'm taking off my vest. how is it this hot?

K: I'm finally cooling off.
K: You have such nice teeth!
K: Apropos of nothing.

B: why thank you... i was actually thinking about your very attractive lips when we were so rudely interrupted by the arrival of your judge.
B: and non-sequiturs are ok. :)

K: Don't tease me so early in the morning!

B: no? i think you like being teased in the morning.

K: And I hate my lips; they're so thin. Yours, on the other hand, are thick and delicious-looking.

B: you are so very wrong. your smile does all sorts of things to me.

K: Does it?

B: come on, you know you're gorgeous.
B: by the way, between the two of us, i think we are wearing every shade of grey available in men's clothing today.

K: Yes, and that bow tie you're wearing would look great with my outfit; I'll have to borrow it.

B: if you're lucky.
B: i have to go be a lawyer now. talk later. ;)

1:10 PM.

B: i just walked three blocks to my car - only three! and i am drenched to the skin. i swear the rain is coming in sideways.

K: You are very distracting today.

B: why is that?
B: my teeth? my lips? i can't help it that you make me smile.

K: I need to get over my schoolboy crush here. I'm married! I have to behave.
K: You are quite charming, though.

B: are you worried you might misbehave?
B: we haven't even touched each other, kurt - not even a handshake, did you know?

K: Yes, I'm aware. I need to watch myself.
K: Sigh.
K: Why do you make me feel like this?

B: i feel it, too.
B: confession: it started well before we first spoke to each other, when i saw you from across the room at a continuing legal education course last spring.

K: Really? What course?

B: the pbi one on lgbt family law. i saw you walking across the room and i was floored.

K: Fuck - that's flattering!
K: It took you long enough to have lunch with me!

B: yes.
B: well.
B: i wanted to, but you know, i'd get butterflies in my stomach whenever i saw you, so...

K: Oh.

B: so i waited for you to insist.

K: And insist I did. Sigh.

B: listen kurt, you don't have to worry about me. i am an extremely well-behaved boy, and i do what i'm told. i will respect your boundaries and keep my hands to myself.
B: and besides, i don't just want to get in your pants.
B: our chemistry is off-the-charts, and flirting with you is so much fun, but i genuinely like you, too. so we'll hang out and control ourselves. deal?

K: I hate having to control myself.

B: well, what is the alternative?
B: would you rather someone else control you? ;)
B: actually, i bet you'd rather control someone else. ;)

K: Don't start that! And stop being insightful.
K: There are no alternatives; I just have to wait out my crush.
K: This is just one of those times I wish I had a day-long pass.
K: P.S. - Why I'm being so forward with you is beyond me...

B: honesty is always a good place to start a friendship.
B: but i think you better keep your hands to yourself.
B: because, kurt – even if just your fingertips were to touch mine? all bets are off. i won't be able to stop.

K: No, no, no! A no-touching rule will not work! I already feel like it's weird that we don't hug. Friends hug.

B: ok, ok. you're probably right, we're going to have to touch eventually. i'm actually rather affectionate by nature. hmm ok, we can negotiate that one.
B: by the by, what's a day-long pass?

K: Day-long pass to do whatever I want and not have it count in the real world of consequences.

B: oh. well.
B: for once i am glad to be sitting stock still in traffic. i am in no fit state to walk into my office, let alone face my secretary. she always knows when something's up.
B: i didn't mean it like that!
B: oh god.
B: i feel a bit like an awkward teenager right now.
B: all i did was think about touching you, and what we could do with that day-long pass, and...

K: I'm right there with you. I'm... worked up, and I've got nowhere to go. I'm stuck behind my desk! Thanks a lot, Blaine.
K: And don't text and drive!

B: you're welcome. ;) and driving implies movement – i'm sitting still.

K: If the car is on, and you're not in park, you're driving. Put down the phone right now.

B: ok ok, yes sir, mr. bossy pants

1:35 PM.

B: i'm parked now.
B: about that day-long pass? it sounds lovely in theory, but the problem would be worse once we'd know what we're missing, i venture to imagine.

K: Yeah, I know, I know – I was thinking about it all weekend.

B: oh reeeally. what were you thinking, exactly?

K: I was thinking of all sorts of wicked things. Things that I need to stop thinking about while I am at work, Blaine.

B: i'm intrigued, and i will get it out of you eventually. but i guess i'll drop it for now, on account of your being in your office.
B: by the way, my car windows keep fogging up. am i really breathing that heavily?

K: You're killing me over here, Blaine.

1:50 PM.

K: Are you in your office yet?

B: nope, i'm sitting in my car in the parking garage writing notes in a file, and trying to cool down enough to walk inside.

K: What music have you been listening to?

B: my katy perry playlist

K: seriously?

B: don't get me started; trust me, you'll regret it.
B: by the way, i keep picturing all of our shades of grey clothing strewn all over my floor.

K: Jesus Christ, Blaine.

7:00 PM.

B: i'm walking out of my office. do you want to talk on the phone?

K: No way, I just got myself a little under control. ;)

B: oh yeah? how did you do that?

K: Dark chocolate and very cold water. How about you?

B: i am heading to the gym where i will be working out my frustration on a punching bag for what i imagine will be a very, very long time
B: and then i will be going home to jerk off for what i imagine will be a very, very short time

K: Fuck, how did this happen? You were barely on my radar before three days ago.

B: that's a lie.

K: I know. Shh.