Summary: Reid Garwin shouldn't need to look up advice on the internet on how to catch the girl of his dreams. But Reid Garwin was desperate and at the end of his rope.

A/N: My sad attempt at humor and romance, haha. Just an idea I had in my head and it wouldn't go away. I definitely spit this out in just a day. It might be revised later. My Reid might be a little out of character, but I like to think he'd be really awkward and not know what to do and do things that just aren't Reid if he was truly and seriously interested in someone. Don't forget to review! I want to know what you guys think. Can't improve without some criticism. Enjoy!


howtogetagirlfriend . com

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Reid Garwin sat in the far end of the library, looking up occasionally to make sure that no one he knew had entered. He made sure to get a seat in the back so that no one could see what he was viewing. And even if they did he would just deny it, because Reid Garwin didn't need to look up advice on the internet on how to catch the girl of his dreams, or what steps to follow to get their attention, or how to let them know that he cared. He didn't need any that. He was Reid fucking Garwin! Women fall at his feet when he walks by, they swoon when he gives them that sultry wink and ever so slight nod of the head, they freakin' drop their panties at a lick of his lips! He was a god, a sex god. No girl could resist his charm. He could get anyone that he wanted.

But who was he kidding? There was only one girl that he wanted and he had no idea how to get her. Usually there was no work involved in getting a girls attention. But it was becoming clearer to him day by day that he would have to work harder than ever to get this girl's attention.

This girl was different. Either she didn't know who he was (and come on, seriously? everyone knew who he was) or she just wasn't interested.

Her name was Arielle. And she was perfect. The moment he laid eyes on her all the other girls he used to chase around became nothing to him. All that mattered was this girl. He wanted to have her, to hold her, to comfort her when she would get sad, to just let her know how much she means to him.

But he had no idea how to do that. He wasn't really the expressive type and he had no idea how to approach her.

He tried talking to her once; you know the usual pick up line about his grandma. But all he got was an 'ew' and a roll of the eyes. I mean, he thought it was a really nice compliment. He loved his grandma.

So here he was lost and without a clue, looking at various self help sites and articles on how to charm women.

He scrolled the page quickly glancing through the various steps before aiming and clicking his mouse on the printer icon. The printer beside him roared to life and a single page printed out.

He quickly closed the window and grabbed the sheet, folding it and shoving it into his pocket. With a quick glance around the library one more time to make sure no one saw him, he quickly left the library.


Reid stared at his reflection in the mirror. He wanted to look flawless for Arielle. He only had one class with her today and he wanted to look absolutely perfect. He looked himself over top to bottom once more.

Clothes perfectly pressed and signature fingerless gloves?...CHECK

Irresistibly sexy, bad boy expression? …..CHECK

Reid turned around in front of the mirror to get a view of his back side.

Best looking ass this side of Ipswich? …. Pfft, please. As if you had to ask.

"Dude, what are you doing?" Tyler stood leaning against the door to the bathroom, toothbrush hanging from his mouth.

Reid quickly straightened himself. His face going into a sneer to cover up the embarrassment he felt from getting caught checking himself out in the mirror. "You done yet?"

Tyler glanced at the clock and back at Reid. "We have 30 minutes. What's the rush?" he said while going back into the bathroom to spit and rinse his mouth.

Reid looked back at the mirror. "I want to get there early." Arielle always got there early.

All the noise in the bathroom from getting ready stopped. A shocked Tyler stuck his head out and stared at Reid in disbelief. "Since when?"

"Since today." He sounded affronted.

Tyler stared at Reid some more. "Are you feeling okay?"

Irritated, Reid rolled his eyes and snatched up his bag. "If you're not coming then I'll just leave without you."

He heard Tyler say his name but paid no attention to it and headed out the door to his first class.


Start off simple. Introduce yourself. This lets her know who you are.

Reid entered the classroom, scanning the room and seeing only a few students with their heads buried in their textbooks, but immediately spotted Arielle in the top corner of the auditorium on her computer.

He wiped his hands on his pants. His hands were suddenly sweaty and his heart was beating so loud he thought it was going to burst through his chest. God, what was this girl doing to him.

He swallowed once trying to get rid of the dry feeling in his mouth and climbed the stairs two at a time.

Arielle was absorbed in her work, her fingers flying over the keyboard, apparently working on a paper. She didn't hear Reid approach her.

Reid placed a hand on the empty chair beside her and cleared his throat.

Nothing.

Evidently she didn't hear him, so he cleared his throat again.

Nothing.

Reid was never one for patience …or manners, and he really hated being ignored whether it was intentional or not.

The annoying clacking of the keys being pressed on and the girl of his dreams not paying any attention to him was starting to grate on his nerves. His right eye twitched as he cleared his throat one more time, a little more forceful and louder than necessary, some students even turning around to see what his problem was.

But still he got nothing. That must be one damn good paper.

"Hey!" he shouted, stunning not only her but everyone else in the classroom. At least that damned clacking stopped.

He looked around the classroom at everyone's shocked faces and muttered a 'sorry' before turning back to Arielle who was staring at him with wide eyes, taken aback by his sudden outburst. Her fingers hovered over her laptop.

"Uh…" he realized he just shouted at her and reached up to scratch the back of his head in embarrassment. What should he do now?

Her wide eyes narrowed into a very impressive glare. If looks could kill Reid was pretty sure he was going to drop dead in a few seconds.

"Can I help you?" she said through gritted teeth.

He swallowed, he'd stick to the plan and introduce himself. "I'm Reid," She just stared at him, so he continued. "Garwin. I'm not sure if you know who I am but—"

"I know who you are." She interrupted him. She looked like she was slowly getting irritated. Why was this guy even talking to her? Didn't he have someone else to go chase after.

Reid smirked. So she knew who he was. That's not a surprise, everyone knew he was. This wasn't going to be so hard after all.

He got a cocky grin on his face and licked his lips. "Oh, so you know who I am, huh?"

That got him a roll of the eyes. "Do you need something?"

He straightened and pointed to the seat next to her. "Just want to talk. Is this seat taken?"

"Yeah, it is."

Reid turned around to see a girl walk up to them. It was the girl that always hung with Arielle. Kathryn was her name.

She moved around Reid and tossed her stuff on the desk, flopped down in the chair and looked up at Reid.

Seeing that his chance of talking with Arielle was ruined and the fact that Kathryn looked like she was going to rip off his head, Reid decided to back off. "Alright, well, I'll just talk to you later." He turned around and walked to his own seat.

He collapsed into his own chair and buried his head in his hands. This wasn't going the way he planned. Maybe he shouldn't have shouted at her, but on the bright side he got her attention. On to step two.


Once you get her attention, kick it up a notch. You need to get noticed. You need to develop a female magnet body language. The seduction gaze is the perfect way to draw a girl in. Try watching a few George Clooney movies to get the right idea. Once you've got that down, lock eyes with her and smile.

Reid stood in the video store. He couldn't decide between One Fine Day, with some chick named Michelle Pfeiffer, or Spy Kids, that looked like it was something for children, but the video store clerk swore that George Clooney was in it, but it just didn't look very romantic.

He made up his mind and placed Spy Kids back on the rack. One Fine Day definitely seemed more romantic. Now all he had to do was head back to the dorms and pop it in the DVD player. He would have his seduction gaze perfect for tomorrow when he saw Arielle again in class.

With a confident smile on his face, he walked up to the register to pay for his rental. Oh, he would have her eating out the palm of his hand by tomorrow.

**O**

"Reid, what the hell are you doing?" Pogue was looking back and forth between his best friend and the hole that was bound to appear in the back of a poor girl's head from all the staring Reid was doing.

They were in their 7th period. The professor was 10 minutes late and in about 5 more minutes they would be free to leave.

"Why are you looking at Arielle?" Kate asked from her seat next to Pogue. She kept looking up at the clock and then to entrance of the classroom, hoping the teacher wouldn't show up so she could leave early and she and Sarah could have that shopping day they had been planning for the last few weeks.

"Mind your own damn business." Reid murmured not breaking his gaze from the back of Arielle's head.

"Whatever." Kate sighed, she really didn't care what Reid did. Apparently he liked the girl, but he was going to scare her off if he kept staring at the back of her head like he was some psycho.

Arielle kept glancing back over her shoulder at Reid. She could just feel his eyes on her and it was creeping her out. She wrapped her sweater tighter around body hoping that would help with some of the uneasiness she was feeling from the constant gawking.

"You're scaring her." Pogue whispered sharply. He was seriously worried about his friend. It was like he just suddenly went off the deep end. "What is your problem?"

Tyler looked over at Pogue, "He's been acting like this for the past few days, constantly staring at Arielle, and looking at some sheet of paper that he refuses to show me. I walked in on him watching George Clooney movies last night."

Pogue mouth dropped open in disbelief. Reid? Watching George Clooney? Did he even know who George Clooney was? His hand immediately went to Reid's forehead.

"Back off man, I'm fine." Reid hissed while pushing Pogue's hand off his forehead, and then immediately going back to the back of Arielle's head.

Arielle turned around, her patience had just ended. "What!" she stood up and looked at Reid, "What do you want?"

Reid looked at her. He mentally recited the step in his head, 'Lock eyes and smile.'

Everyone held their breath and watched the silent exchange between the two.

He got up from his seat and stood eye level with Arielle, locking eyes with her. And smiled, what he hoped was a seductive smile. But from the horrified look on Arielle's face, it must've come off a bit on the scary side.

Reid silently cursed. Maybe he had shown too much teeth. But that couldn't be it, he had practiced all night! Three hours in front of the mirror, practicing his seductive gaze and smile! He did everything George Clooney did and he was hotter than George Clooney! Why wasn't she eating out the palm of his hand?

"Your friend needs help." She said to his group of friends, grabbed her things, and left. Kate was laughing, while Tyler and Pogue just stared in disbelief. Reid sighed and fell into his chair. Another failed attempt. He should've gone with Spy Kids.


Play hard to get. Don't be too available. Women love it when you act like you're not interested.

Reid didn't have a chance to try out the advice until late afternoon the next day. Finally, he made his way behind Arielle and a group of her friends as they made their way down to the cafeteria.

"Hey Arielle!" he called and was surprised she stopped and looked over at him.

"So… are you going to the Nicki's tonight? Not that I care…just asking…" he tried to act nonchalant.

Arielle looked confused. "…I wasn't planning on it."

"Oh, I see…well then, I guess I won't see you there…not that you'll know what you're missing." And with that he walked away leaving a bewildered Arielle in his wake.


When talking to her be sure to use her name frequently. Women love to know that you have their full attention and are speaking directly to them. It's not only music to her ears because it means you're focusing on her, which makes her more comfortable.

They were in AP Physics, and Reid found himself paired up with Arielle. Today was his lucky day. He thanked every holy and unholy thing he could think of.

He glanced at Arielle, who looked like she was less than thrilled to have Reid as a partner. "So, Arielle," he said conversationally. "Nice weather we're having," Reid winced. He had been trying to say something cool that would sweep her off her feet. "Um… Arielle," he added somewhat lamely.

The girl rolled her eyes and tried to focus on the assignment in front of them.

Reid cleared his throat and started again, "Arielle…"

"Please shut up."


It had already been a week and Reid was nowhere closer to girlfriend. He was already halfway through his list and still had nothing to show from it. He hadn't even gotten a smile from his special lady. Shouldn't he have been seeing some progress?

As a last resort, he decided to seek out some help.

"I really just don't know what to do anymore." Reid confessed to Sarah.

He went and seeked out Ipswich's most famous couple for a little love advice. Because, the ones he got from the internet weren't working and he was really out of ideas. He really liked this girl but didn't know how to tell her.

"Oh Reid," Sarah sighed as she looked over the list Reid had printed out. "You can't look to a list to help you figure out how to approach women. This girl is obviously different from the ones you usually chase around."

"But I'm Reid Garwin! She should be lucky that I'm even paying any attention to her!." He shouted, he was getting fed up with all of his hard work getting him nowhere. "Why won't she notice me!"

Sarah gasped at his outburst, appalled that he would say such a thing as someone should pay attention to him for the sole fact that he was Reid Garwin. "You are such an asshole sometimes!"

Reid's eyebrows shot up to his hairline. Did sweet innocent Sarah just call him an asshole? Was she even capable of saying mean things?

"You're conceited, arrogant, rude, mean…."

Apparently she was.

"…inconsiderate, a jerk, you're not loyal at all, untrustworthy—"

"Sarah." Caleb nudged his girlfriend trying to get her to calm down.

She sighed, realizing her mistake. "Look Reid, I know you're not used to feeling….emotions, but you can't expect Arielle to like you just because you're Reid Garwin. That might work for all the other girls but it won't work on her. And you don't need a stupid list to tell you what to do either. Just be honest with her. Try showing that side to Arielle and I'm sure she won't be able to resist you."

**O**

Sarah's words rang through his head over and over again throughout the entire day.

He liked Arielle, that's a fact. He wanted to be with her more than anything. He had to work to get her and maybe that's what was so attracted to her. He usually didn't have to work to get anyone.

He chuckled at the thought of the way he acted the past week. He must've alarmed everyone. He wondered if that's what love did to you. He guessed it just made you crazy.

He spotted a flash of Arielle's red bag that she carried everywhere with her. She was just walking out of a classroom, most likely her last class of the day.

He followed after her, maneuvering around people until he reached her. He placed a hand on her shoulder to stop her ad spin her around.

"Arielle."

She sighed. "What now, Reid."

He smiled. "I'm here to apologize."

She raised an eyebrow. Apologize? She thought Reid Garwin didn't apologize. And he didn't. She must be really special then.

"Apologize?" she prompted him to go on.

He sighed and shoved his hands in his pockets. "About this week. I know I've been acting strange. But the truth is…that I like you. A lot actually. And I just didn't know how to react. It was new to me. I don't usually have feelings…at all."

Arielle smiled at him and shook her head. He really was cute when he wasn't going all psycho. "Apology accepted."

"And you can make it up by taking me to dinner." Arielle looked up at Reid.

"Like a date?"

She look thoughtful and then nodded. "Like a date. I think we should get to know each other and see where it goes from there."

Reid smiled again. He didn't think he had ever smiled this much before. This girl is definitely a keeper and was worth all the trouble he went through.

Most women have heard all the old pick up lines and while compliments are very nice and will help her notice you, it will take something special to help you stand out from the crowd. So if all else fails, just be yourself. Don't be afraid to be honest with your special lady. She will love you for it in the end.

Howtogetagirlfriend . com

A/N: It's done! Sorry it was so short. It was supposed to be longer but I didn't keep half the stuff I had in there. All the tips I actually found on dating websites haha. Don't forget to review.