Star Wars
This is to be honest my very first time writing a Star Wars fic here, so bear with me on this. But fear not, I have seen all six of the movies at times whenever I had the chance and has great storytelling of the master himself, George Lucas who is the father of Star Wars aha so hopefully with these parody fics of this maybe it could go well.
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Wars or anything, they belong to Disney already, which was used to be George Lucas sadly. But he'll always be the original guy of this awesome sauce stuff to me :)
Episode XX:P-
Where Are The Salt Flakes?
In a time of great peril, when the whole Galaxy is in a peril...debt peril since Kylo Ren who is at times should've been mature and be professional on everything hadn't been born with a huge bump he suffered as a baby lmao but theres been trouble brewing between the Resistance and the First Order, that its so tiresome like finding a job in this stupid trouble of a recession, most of the sorry ones had to be employed to the Order since they were handing out free sweets smh. Also on the other side of the crisis, Rey a young woman who has sought dreams to become a reality show star struggles to get out of Jakku as she tries to hot-wire one of Unkar Plutt's coolzy gravity jumper bikes which were also stolen by rich Jawas from Beverly Hills. And so begins this stupid journey once more...
...On the other hand there are more plot surprises here but its too complicated so just read on on whats coming up...
Me: "Phasma, honey could you please turn on the heater? Its getting cold here for both of us."
Captain Phasma: "Yes, sir right away. *Winks eye at me and uses her armored self to retract the heat for both of us*
Me: "Thanks." *Winks eye*
Captain Phasma: "Dont mention it, darling." *Winks back*
Note: Sorry here, I just love Captain Phasma. Shes my new fave in this new trilogy thats unfolding as of late after 30 years of wait with Star Wars lmao
Parody Act 1: Kylo Ren? Sounds Like Kitchen Ren To Me
Aboard his stupid Star Destroyer, Salty Ren tries out a new kitchen ware which was handed to him by none other than the mysterious leader of the First Order, Supreme Leader Stokes.
"Hmmm, I gotta have this operational if I'm not gonna be hungry here..." Ren grasp his chin in front of the new gravity burner which was presented to him in his room. "Trooper! I want this on now!"
The Stormtrooper then nodded, but slipped on a peeled banana by accident and fell face first into the floor. "Ouch." He said
Kylo Ren then flustered and got up with hisses. "Goddamn it! No help around here!" The Salt Lord then approached towards the burner and off he went with a shiny toysaber which he wields currently since the First Order is low on battery stuff to power more on their military craft. Some military inflation there to save aha
"..." And he still looked at the gravity burner Stokes gave him.
And then proceeded to go to his seat and then another banana peel was present on the floor which caught him unnoticed. And slipped he went like he was on some ice-skating competition like a petite ballerina.
Kylo Ren was now Down-Lo Ren when he fell.
"Goddamn it!" He now enacted Child Tantrum 2.0 with his arms and legs being waved like an idiot as if he was on a kindergarten mat in school.
"Mom! Dad! I freaking hate you guys!" The Complaining Neighbor of the Salt hissed loudly, which echoed throughout the halls and hulls of his stupid toy Star Destroyer. None onboard were amused to his child moments.
*Star Wars End Theme begins*
Thanks for reading! More coming up if I can! And may the reads be with you :)