Fifth Grade

"Whoever lands the farthest wins," Fang announced. He was sitting on the floor a good distance away from where Lissa and I were swinging.

"I already know I'm going to win," I yelled, pushing my shoes into the sand to rise higher. Lissa stopped swinging. "Oh, c'mon, Lissa, you're no fun, why'd you stop?"

I felt my own swing start to lose momentum as I stopped pushing. Lissa got off her swing and walked towards where Fang was.

"I don't want to compete with Max, and anyway I'll get dirty," she said with a sneer. She sat down next to Fang.

"You're only saying that because you know you're going to lose," I shot back. Fang stood up and started walking toward the swing Lissa had just gotten off of. He sat down and started to swing himself.

"I'll do it." Fang half-smiled at me and then added in a whisper, "Lissa's no competition, anyway."

Lissa didn't seem to hear that and I smiled back at Fang. "You're on, Fangles! But don't be crying when you lose!" He shook his head and started to swing faster. I did the same, my feet pushing into the sand with as much force as my small legs could muster and then using my upper body to swing higher. I kept on going and going and then finally when I was as high as I could go I shouted, "On the count of three. One, two...THREE!" and I jumped off, letting go of the chains and propelling myself forward.

The air made the my hair fly around my face and I threw my arms out wide, as if I was flying. It felt so great to be suspended like that. There was so much freedom and I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to have wings and be able to fly, to be among the birds and the clouds. It all ended within a second and then I was nearing the ground. I put my arms in front of me protectively and then I hit the ground with a loud thump, throwing sand in all directions. I rolled to my side quickly. It didn't really hurt, but the sand was lodged into my skin and it was prickly. I dusted it off and then look to the side where Fang had landed. I frowned.

He was sitting down a few feet away, dusting off the sand from his hands and his clothes. I noticed he had landed a few feet farther than me, but he couldn't win me! When he wasn't looking I scooted back enough until I was sure I would win. He glanced back at me.

"Well, Fang, looks like you lost," I said smugly. I stood up and looked down at him. "I mean it was expected, but I just hope you don't feel so bad." I shrugged and smiled at him.

He glared at me with his black eyes for a few seconds and then stated, "You cheated."

I put a hand to my chest and gasped. I hoped it looked real. "You offend me, Fang! I didn't cheat at -" I was cut off by Lissa.

"Yeah, you did. You scooted back so that you could be farther," she said as she walked towards us. She held out a hand for Fang, but he didn't take it. I smiled a little on the inside, he still liked me more than her. But Lissa, that traitor! I thought we were all best friends! "Fangy won."

"There's no proof of this cheating. I'm leaving, my mom wants me to help her cook," I said and then turned around. I started walking away. My own best friend betrayed me for our other best friend. How dare she!

"You can't cook, though!" Fang yelled.

I turned around and glared at Fang, who was running towards me with Lissa a little behind. I crossed my arms. "Yes, I can...well...I'm learning."

Fang smirked. "You can't cook, Max, face it. You'd probably burn the whole house down if you ever tried."

Lissa started laughing and I glared at them both. "I don't like you guys."

"He's kidding, Max," Lissa said, still laughing. "We'll come with you and help your mom, too." She actually wasn't even home. I had lied.

"Didn't she make cookies today?" Fang asked. My eyes widened and I started running home. I heard Fang and Lissa running behind me as well.

"Yeah," I yelled as I caught sight of my house. "For that meeting at school tonight!" I knew she would make extras of her delicious cookies and they would taste so awesome.

I smelled the cookies as soon as I stepped through the door. "You guys are so lucky you're my best friends," I told Fang and Lissa as they walked in, their noses in the air.

"Yeah, we are," Fang said, grinning, and then we raided the kitchen.

Summer before Freshman Year

I couldn't do this anymore. It was too much for me. Day after day, the same tortures, the agonizingly painful droning and boredom. The harsh rules, the sound of scratching on paper, the irritating company; it's all so pathetically inevitable. School.

Why, oh why, must summer break be over? Not only that, but I had to start high school. The place where you're either highly successful or doomed to be a nobody; where people are tested to their breaking point. I didn't want to go. More than anything I just didn't want to go. But I had to.

There was one upside to all of it: I got to go with my two best friends. Lissa, with her glossy red hair and bright green eyes, will probably be popular, not only because she's naturally pretty, but because she can play volleyball like it's no one's business. She's nice, sure she gets a bitchy attitude every now and then, but I've known her since forever and I could honestly say she was like the sister that I never had (okay, so I had Ella, my half-sister, but she was only ten and I really couldn't talk to her like a real sister just yet, without getting into the topic of prepubescent boys and whatnot).

Then there's Fang. Fang with his incredibly dark brown eyes, so dark they looked black, and his midnight black hair that fell to just below his eyebrows. I didn't know how he'd fare in high school, but no matter what, I knew he wouldn't leave us. I'd known him almost as long as Lissa, he moved here when he was nine years old. During that time me and Lissa were already best friends. When we met him, we just took him in. He's tall and lanky and he doesn't really talk a lot, but when he does it's usually important. I wouldn't have him any other way.

The only problem is that I'm starting to feel weird about him. Whenever I talk to him, I get kind of nervous and I start blushing, which is totally unlike me, especially with Fang! Every time we accidentally touched, I felt a shock go through me, and when I looked at his lips, I wanted to kiss him. Sometimes the urge got to me so much that I had to leave the room just so I could take a few breaths. So what does that mean? As much as it pained me to admit it, it meant that I had a crush on one of my best friends and he didn't even know it.

I sighed and rolled over in my bed. Well, my unrequited love was of no importance at the moment. The only thing that mattered was that school was starting the next day. I groaned. Why?

Just then my door flew open and I shot up faster than a balloon can pop. Lissa stood at my door in sweats and a t-shirt. She had bags upon bags in her hands and she was looking at me with wide eyes and a huge smile.

"High school starts tomorrow!" she yelled, running across the room, and dropped the bags at her feet. "Can you believe it? I'm so happy. I want to make a big impression, you know? And I thought, 'Well, what better way than to go with a new wardrobe!'" Lissa and I had always been tomboys, dressing with basketball shorts, sweats, t-shirts, hoodies; comfortable clothes, basically. Though she was always more careful about being clean than I was.

I looked down at the bags and nodded my head towards them. "What's in there?" She rolled her eyes, smiling, and bent down to open one and started taking really colorful things out. I grimaced when I saw all the tank tops, shorts, skirts, and fancy shirts. "Oh, please tell me you did not just spend all your allowance on some stupid clothes." I picked up up one of the shorts, noticing it wasn't really more than a strip of fabric. Lissa snatched it out my hands.

"Yes, I did and I'm going to go try some of this on so you can see that it wasn't a waste." With that she took the shorts, a tank top and this other little weird thing and left the room, going to the bathroom to change. I sighed and laid down on my bed again. I didn't know why Lissa was trying to change how she looked. Well, she was always going on and on about how she wanted a boyfriend. Maybe that's why. Not many guys want to get with tomboys.

For the second time in that same hour, I shot up when I heard my door open. Instead of Lissa, there was Fang. My heart sped up and I was suddenly aware of what I was wearing; ugly basketball shorts and an over-sized jersey. My dirty blonde hair was also horribly put together in a messy bun and I probably still had the imprints of my pillow on my cheek from laying down for so long. I knew Fang had seen me like that before, but I still felt a little embarrassed. I decided to ignore the feeling since I couldn't do anything about it. I smiled and he walked over to the bed and sat down. He took one look at all the bags on the floor and gave me a questioning glance.

"Lissa," I stated. He furrowed his brow since Lissa wasn't much of a shopper. We were like that. We knew what the other was thinking without really having to say anything. I continued, "I don't know either, I think she wants to fit into the high school persona or something so she went out and bought a bunch of new clothes." I shrugged. "It seems like a waste to me."

"You guys don't need to change just to fit in at high school. You're perfect just the way you are," he said as if he were stating a fact. Even though he was referring to me and Lissa, my heart couldn't help but to give a little jump when he said we were perfect.

Instead of expressing my thanks, I punched him. Hard. I know, I'm such a flirt (sarcasm). I hate myself sometimes. He winced and then grinned.

"I'm not joking. I like you how you are. You don't need to change at all."

Something about the way he said that gave me hope and I started blushing. I turned away a little, trying to hide my face, but I noticed him grinning.

Just then Lissa walked in.

My shock was very noticeable, but I don't think it was as much as Fang's. His eyes went wide and he sat up straighter. His mouth was hanging a bit open and I could tell that he was gripping the bed sheets a little too tight. Something in his reaction worried me, but I was too shocked by Lissa's appearance to really analyze him.

We didn't dress provocatively; it just wasn't us. We were the tomboys who scoffed at the idea of dresses and makeup, but when Lissa walked in with her creamy pale legs and smooth long arms all exposed, she looked like she'd been dressing in short shorts and tank tops all her life. She completely owned the outfit. The weird thing she had taken turned out to be a vest that she wore over the tank top and it completely made us notice her extremely small waist. She had let her red hair down and she just looked so pretty, model-worthy, even. I couldn't stand it. This wasn't the Lissa I knew, but at the same time, I could tell it was who she wanted to be.

She walked to the only mirror I had in my room, the vanity, and looked at herself. After a few moments of just looking at herself back and forth she turned to us and asked the dreaded question: "How do I look?"

At the same time that I said, "Weird," Fang answered, "Great," his voice slightly hoarse and cracking a bit.

Something about his response not only made my chest hurt but let me know that some things were going to change and I probably wasn't going to like it.

Junior Year

It was an early, Friday morning in mid-October and I was nearly dying from all the running I'd been doing. Try-outs for track didn't start until January, but my time for the mile wasn't nearly as good as I wanted it to be and I couldn't run longer than three miles at a time. I needed to work on that, so I'd been running everyday before and after school. Sure, it meant waking up earlier and staying after school later, but I really wanted to meet my goals. And besides that, running helped me relieve stress.

It was my junior year and school was only getting harder, what with trying to keep up in those honors classes I had stupidly enrolled in and starting to look into colleges. It was too much pressure. I was just glad that I had my friends to fall back on.

I was still best friends with Fang and Lissa, even though we'd made more friends. Fang had Iggy, Lissa had her weird, nearly twin Brigid, and I had Nudge. Iggy had strawberry-blonde hair and pale blue eyes and he was hilarious, sexist a lot of times, but he was cool to hang with. Brigid was incredibly annoying, but I tolerated her because of Lissa. She looked almost exactly like Lissa, they were the same height, they had the same hair, and they even acted the same sometimes. She was also constantly hitting on Fang, but he rarely ever acknowledged her. It made me proud. Nudge had mocha-colored skin and pretty brown curls and she was possibly one of the most optimistic, talkative, girly girls I'd ever met, but she made me laugh and she was a great friend. We had our own friends, but no one could take the place of our friendship.

Fang, Lissa, and I hung out every weekend. Most of the time we played sports, even though Lissa had pretty much abandoned all physical activity once she became one of the more popular girls, or we went to the movies upon Lissa's request. Lissa usually sat out when we played soccer, since she didn't like it. I loved it. Fang would always do these tricks and my favorite was when he kicked the ball between my feet and he'd put one arm around my waist as he side-stepped me. Those fleeting touches made me happy, even if they meant nothing to him.

Sadly, Fang and I had seen no progress in our non-existent relationship. Or better yet, we had made no move to actually initiate one. Fang never seemed to be interested in me. He'd had only one girlfriend during our entire high school career, for two months during freshman year, and then they broke up. He didn't really like her, in fact she was the one who had asked him out. I had laughed at that and called him a pansy and he had just glared before tackling me into the ground. I'd had guys ask me out every now and then, mostly beefy jocks, but I didn't like them.

Fang always got protective during those times. One time, sophomore year, the quarterback of the varsity football team,m Dylan, had asked me out and I didn't know what to say. It was the one time I had found someone other than Fang attractive.

"Why would you want to go out with him?" Fang had asked as we sat on the grass after a short game of soccer. Lissa had already left because she had a date. "He's too old, anyway."

I bumped him with my shoulder. "He's a senior, he's not that much older."

"It's two years," he pointed out. "He's seventeen, he's going to want to do some things that you aren't ready for."

I looked at him pointedly. "How are you so sure I wouldn't be ready if he wanted to do some of those things?"

He glared at me. "You won't."

I glared back. "It's possible I will." I wasn't saying that I was going to go far with Dylan, but it irked me that Fang was trying to control what I did.

"Max," he said, exasperated. He ran his hands down his face. "Promise me that if you do go out with him, or any guys you go out with, you won't do anything you're not ready for."

I smirked and said, "Maybe."

"Max," he said sternly.

I sighed exaggeratedly. "Okay, fine, I promise I won't. I probably won't even go out with him." I shrugged.

He smiled and then said, "Okay, and also, you won't do anything that only married people should do, until you yourself are married."

I blushed furiously and then burst out laughing. He joined in after a while. I ended up not even going out with Dylan, but that conversation with Fang always stayed in my mind. I always wondered why he made me promise that; whether it was because he thought of himself as my brother and he was just being overprotective or if it was because of something else.

I didn't go out with Dylan because I already knew who I wanted, only it was so difficult to find a way to get Fang to actually notice me in that way. I didn't know what to do.

Nudge got to me and started to dress me differently, meaning tighter jeans and 'cuter' shirts, but other than that, I really made no effort to change how I looked. Fang had once said I was perfect the way I was, so I saw no reason to change that. But when I really thought about it, I sometimes wondered what it would be like if I started to dress more like Lissa. I wanted to see if I could get the same reaction out of him as Lissa did that one time freshman year. But I didn't want that. I wasn't like that, and I didn't feel comfortable wearing those clothes.

Lissa did, and she dressed like that everyday. I liked to think that that was why she always had a boyfriend. From the first week of freshman year to now, she'd always had a boyfriend. She broke up with them pretty fast, but she always had one.

I was nearing my second to last lap when I saw a flash of black out of the corner of my eye. I stopped running and took out my earphones. I turned to see Fang walking down the steps leading to the football field.

He'd changed so much these past few years; not personality wise, but he'd started to lift weights so he was so much more muscular. Not enough to say that he was buff, but he did have muscles and every part of him was toned. I knew because that summer we'd gone swimming and I'd gotten a good look at his six-pack. Unfortunately, so did all of Lissa's preppy friends, since it was her pool party. He'd only become more good-looking, but I was glad that he was still him.

He called me over.

I started doing small lunges so that my muscles didn't cramp and made my way over to him.

I still got that feeling in my heart whenever I saw him, like it was beating too fast and it'd burst out of my chest if I didn't take a deep breath. I tried to calm my heart down when I got closer. I looked into his black eyes and noticed he looked a little nervous.

I raised an eyebrow and motioned for him to follow me to the bleachers. We sat down, unbearably close, so close his leg rubbed against mine.

"What are you doing here so early?" I asked him, taking a swig out of my water bottle. "School doesn't start for another hour and a half, or have you finally decided that track is the superior sport?" I teased. Fang only played football and soccer, he thought track was pointless.

"I knew I would find you here," was all he said. He started biting his lip. It was weird, he rarely ever showed this much emotion, but whatever it was was making him really nervous.

"Why were you looking for me?" I decided to go with an easier question.

"I...need your advice, I guess." He looked down and started fidgeting with the end of his shirt. I was so confused and worried. Why was he acting like this? And why the heck did he need my advice? I was horrible at giving advice. I can't even give myself advice.

"What's wrong?"

He waited a moment before answering. "Nothing's wrong, I just need to ask you something."

Here it is, I thought, my heart racing. He's going to ask me out. Of course he is! I should have figured it out, that's why he came so early so that he could find me alone and that's why he's so nervous. I couldn't help but think that maybe some of my efforts had paid off. I know I didn't try to really put myself out there to get noticed, but I tried doing things like holding Fang's eyes longer than necessary, or touching him whenever I could, or even smiling at him for no reason, hoping he would understand. I also tried to be less rude to him, though that was definitely a great feat. Suddenly I was nervous, too.

He stayed silent again, so I nudged him and said, "So what's so important that you needed to ask me about?"

He took a deep breath and then blurt out, "I want to ask Lissa out."

My heart could have stopped right there and I wouldn't have noticed. I didn't know what to say, that's not what I was expecting, at all. I looked ahead to the opposite side of the football field and the other set of bleachers, normally reserved for the visiting team's fans, where the sun was beginning to rise. It was a creating an effect where the clouds turned into beautiful shades of purples, pinks, oranges, and reds. It was so beautiful. And I wanted to cry. How could something that looked so beautiful, so peaceful and majestic, and that could make the world feel so warm and opening, be here in front of me when all I wanted to do was curl up and cry because of this stupid situation I was in?

I stayed silent for a few seconds longer until I realized that Fang was waiting for a response. Without looking at him, I said, "That's not a question, and she has a boyfriend." I know. It was stupid to say that, I should have said something like, 'I like you, Fang! Ask me out!' but that would've seemed creepy and desperate.

"No, she doesn't, she dumped Marco two days ago," he said, with hope in his voice. It nearly killed me to hear it.

"I didn't know you liked Lissa," I said, trying to keep the depression that was settling into me out of my voice. He would've seemed suspicious, then.

He sighed and leaned back into the bleachers. "I have, actually, for quite a while now." Twist the knife a little deeper, why don't you? "At first it was just a crush so I didn't make it known, but a few months ago I started to really like her."

He leaned forward, putting his elbows on his knees and rested his chin on his hands. He looked straight forward so that all I could see was his black mess of hair and his slouched shoulders. I ached to bring my hand up and to touch him, but I couldn't. Not now that I knew he liked our best friend and he wanted to be with her, not me.

"I love her fiery red hair, and her pretty green eyes," he sighed again, and I could tell he was lovestruck. "I think, really, it's the hair that did it. I don't know why, but I really love the red hair." I couldn't speak anymore. It was too much. I felt like if I didn't get out of there, I would burst into tears and then what would I do? Fang would get freaked out and ask what was wrong and I wouldn't be able to tell him, no matter how much I wanted to.

Why wouldn't he like Lissa? She was perfect for him. She was the adequate height, not like me who towered over all the other girls at 5'10 and she had the perfect complexion and she was beautiful enough for him. I had ugly dirty blonde hair with split ends, where she had lustrous red curls, that Fang apparently loved, and I had dull brown eyes, to her shining green ones. She was also outgoing in a different way from me. Whereas she was usually always sweet and liked by a lot of people, I was rude, causing a lot of trouble, and people tended to hate me the second they met me. We were nearly opposites, and it was no wonder he picked her and not me. I don't even know why I had even thought he would go out with me, when Lissa was around.

"So, Max, do you think I should ask her out?" he asked me, in his beautiful deep voice.

I took a deep breath and tried to muster up some good feelings for him. It was hard. "Fang, if you really like her, I don't know what you're doing out here with me." I tried smiling. "You should be at your house getting ready for school so that you could ask her the second you see her. I know she'll say yes. We've all been best friends forever, and I bet she likes you the same way. She'd be stupid not to like you."

I tried smiling again and was glad to see that Fang believed it because he smiled back. A real smile, not the half-ones he usually shows. He really, actually wanted her, and that only broke me more inside.

"I hope you're right, Max. I've known her for a long time, but she changed so much these past few years that I feel like I'm getting to know her all over again, so thanks," he said with real joy. He stood up and I followed. He hugged me, which caught me off guard since he wasn't a hugger, but I quickly hugged him back, not wanting to miss out on the opportunity.

"Yeah, alright," I pushed him off of me and grinned. "Leave now, so that you can get ready to ask her out, or I'll have to tell her myself as soon as I get home." I smirked and he rolled his eyes.

"See you later, Max," he called as he went back up the steps, that time he went back with a new energy, determined.

I yelled out, one last time, "Aww, Fangles is in love!" I heard him chuckle as he walked away.

When I saw the last traces of him leave, I finally sat down and let the tears fall uninhibited.

One thing was for sure, I'd waited too long, and now it was too late.

Disclaimer: I do not own Maximum Ride or anything that comes from it.