Comedy Hour
By: Kat of Pokemon: The Hokubu & Nanka Trek

A/N: OK. This is my first attempt at any sort of comedy, other than my Sailormoon/Pokemon crossover, "Princesses & Pokemon", and that was pretty bad. Please review and tell me if I should bother with the second one I'm planning. Please? Thank you! Arigato, ja ne!

Warning: Contains extreme silliness and idiosyncrasies.

The Legendary Beast of Lightning was sprawled out on his back in the middle of the Training House. The Training House sat just down the road from Rainbow Mansion; home of the Elite 4. He was snoring loudly, getting an evil eye from Suicune, who kept stepping down off her perch on the wall, poking him to stop his noise, then going back again. Each time she'd poke and prod him, he'd stop snoring. For the moment. As soon as she was again comfortably set on her wall perch, ready to drift off, the Thunder Beast turned on his buzz saw again. She growled and bared her teeth on the left side, puffs of mist spewing from her nose, and stood up again, hopping down with her long purple mane flowing behind her. She stopped right next to him, lifted her front right paw, and made it clear she'd had enough. She stomped down right on the center of his stomach.

"Yow!" he jolted in pain and sprang to a stand, "What was that for?!"

"For sounding like a camel straining for air!" she hissed and drenched his face, causing him to look like a wet rat.

He spit out a stream of water, "I do not snore," he started the age-old argument yet again.

"You do so! Ask anyone!" she spat, spraying him with a blast of water again, "You can even ask Ent-"

They were both cut off from their bickering by the sound of a crew of jackhammers, buzz saws and freight trains starting their work. But…It wasn't a work crew. Nope. It was Entei. The lion-like Fire Beast was curled up in the corner of the Training House, snoring twice as loud as Raikou had been. Suicune growled and Raikou rolled his eyes. They both walked over to him, each standing on either side, and glared down at him. They looked at each other, nodded, then looked back at him.

"Hey, Entei. You'd better wake up," Raikou poked his side, hearing him grunt a refusal, "No, I'm serious. There's a storm coming. A heavy rainstorm."

Suicune looked up and let out a series of Water Guns, allowing them to drop down on Entei like raindrops, "YEE-AHHH!" Entei went flying into the air, screaming at the top of his lungs before running around the entire Training Floor yelling, "Rain! Rain! I hate water!" he wailed, jumping and sliding under an awning and cowering there as Raikou and Suicune laughed at him.

"That was perfect!" Raikou cheered, falling over in hysterical laughter.

"Yeah! He fell for it so easily!" Suicune tipped over and lay out on top of Raikou, both laughing and pounding their paws on the ground.

"I will have revenge," Entei murmured, only serving to have Suicune and Raikou laugh harder.

"Su-Su-Sure you will!" Raikou fought out, "Oh, man! You're so gullible!"

"Rain! Rain! I hate water!" Suicune mimicked him and hopped around the Floor in blissful hilarity, "Oh no! I'm the great Beast of Fire and I'm petrified of a little drizzle!"

If anyone could have seen Entei's skin under the tremendous amount of fur gracing his body, Suicune and Raikou could have proved they thought he reddened significantly…And not because of his Firepower. They both just rolled around in laughter, their eyes starting to tear up.

"Ooh…" Entei growled, "Onena' these days…"

*^~^**^~^*

Entei was still sulking two hours after that horrendous joke, but he was just quietly devising pay back. He grumbled something to himself whenever Raikou or Suicune walked by; probably thinking up some clever little scheme to put them through. He was gonna ruffle their feathers-um-fur enough that they'd have bad hair-uh-fur days for the rest of the year. He was going to make it known that he didn't care for fun and games; especially those which required or brought about his interaction with water. He finally gathered himself a plan and wandered over to Suicune's wall, looking up at her.

"Hey, Suicune," he grinned only to himself, "What're you up to?"

She looked down at him and narrowed her eyes wearily, "Sitting," she answered plainly.

"You mean you're not conjuring a wind storm?" he asked innocently.

"Wind storm? No. Not me," she shrugged, "It must be Articuno."

"Oh boy, I don't know. It's blowing that great big thunder head right this way…"

"Thunder head?!" she shrieked, lunging down and bolting under the awning where Entei had hid before.

Entei started laughing and Suicune peeked out from under the shade to see it was bright and sunny in every direction, "That's rich!" Entei bellowed sarcastically.

"It is not!" she crawled out and stood up to glare at him, "That wasn't funny!"

"Sure it was!" Entei smirked, "You ran so fast! You should have seen her face!" she started walking away and he walked backwards in front of her, showing her the face she made, "It was-It was-It was just like this!" he copied her.

"Shut up!" she pushed past him, "Just wait until you try a stunt like that with Raikou. He'll get you back."

"Yeah right," he sat down and waved his paw at her as she walked away, "Just like you did, I presume?"

"Shut up!"

*^~^**^~^*

"What happened to you?" Raikou looked Suicune over as she sat down in the corner.

"That jerk Entei, that's what," she spat, "He told me there was a thunder head coming at me. Can you believe him?!"

"Well…We did kinda scare him before," Raikou admitted.

Suicune frowned and glared, "Are you taking his side?"

"I'm taking my own side. If he got you, he'll be after me next. Good thing I know there're no Onix around here…"

"He'll rig something up, I bet. Something that'll scare your fur right off your skin."

"Knowing him, I'm sure. It's revenge, remember? It could be anything," he shivered and peeked around the door, "I just hope he doesn't get to borrow Bruno's Onix."

"Quit it with the Onix stuff already!" Suicune snapped, "Just be prepared."

"I don't think I could be any more prepared."

"That's what you think," Entei laughed, hopping down into the hole he dug.

He crawled around and under Raikou, sticking something over his paws and pushing upward to push it up right in front of his fellow Legend. He heard a loud, long scream of a roar as the Dugtrio puppet sent Raikou through the roof. Raikou hated Ground and Rock-type Pokemon. Raikou wailed and jumped behind Suicune, shaking in utter fear.

"Save me, Suicune!" he wailed.

"Oh, come on! It's just Entei!" she walked over and pulled the puppet from Entei, by means of biting and pulling; Entei waved.

Raikou's right eye narrowed before he sauntered over and sent a static jolt through Entei's leg, "That was not funny!" he shouted as Entei sat below the ground, laughing despite his paralysis.

"Yes! Yes it was!" the sparks of thunder rolling around him didn't seem to faze his snickering, "That was perfect! The way you screamed was great!"

Raikou and Suicune glanced at each other, then glared at Entei. He just kept laughing and rolling around as the paralysis slowly wore off. Raikou shook his head and stomped off, puffing at him. Suicune rolled her eyes and filled in the small hole Entei had made when he'd played his little trick. Entei sat down there, kicking and screaming, for another five-ten minutes before slowly making his way out the other end of the hole. He was still snickering, but not nearly as hard as he had been.

He made his way down the hall under the bleachers and was just rounding the corner to his section when he heard laughter; loud, hysterical laughter. It was high-pitched and chilling, sending cold bursts up and down his backbone. He paused to shiver momentarily before slowly peeking around the corner. A cold blast of air washed over him, causing him to actually shake from the chill. He shook even harder as a dense fog filtered around him. He started looking frantically side to side, but saw no one.

"R-R-Raikou?" he choked out as he heard slow and steady footsteps from down the hall, "S-S-Suicune?"

The laughter came again, nearly scaring him out of his skin. He could now see something moving in the mist. Something tall and well built on two legs. It was much too tall to have been one of his fellow Beasts, and it couldn't have been both of them together, as no Beast could walk on their hind legs. He backed away slowly, trying desperately to keep from running like a maniac.

"En…tei…" came the course moan.

"WAH!" Entei turned tail and took off back the way he came, screaming wildly as the high-pitched laughter echoed down the hall behind him.

*^~^**^~^*

Entei came flying out of the door leading to the hall beneath the bleachers. Raikou and Suicune stared blankly, as he was screaming at the top of his lungs. He sat down while running, coming to a sliding and spinning stop beside them. He panted and choked, heaving from his run.

"What happened to you?" Raikou's head fell to the side, but he received no answer, "What's wrong? Meowth got your tongue?"

Entei just sat there in front of them, staring blankly, "Hellooo in there," Suicune waved her paw in front of his face, "Entei?"

"Huh?" he suddenly snapped back to reality, "What?"

"Raikou asked what happened to you…" she glanced momentarily at Raikou, who shrugged.

Entei nearly fell over by the look of his face, "I j-j-just saw a ghost," he gagged.

Raikou and Suicune sat there staring at him for a minute before bursting into hysterical laughter. Entei's jaw dropped, as he couldn't believe they were laughing at him. He knew what he saw! He saw some freakish apparition in the hallway under the bleachers in the Training House in Rainbow Metro. What was so hard to believe about that? Still…Suicune and Raikou didn't seem to show any concern that their current residency could, in fact, be haunted.

"I'm serious!" Entei shouted over their snickering, "I saw a ghost on my way to bed!"

"Yeah right!" Suicune waved her paw at him, "You've been eating too many fireflies! They're illuminating your imagination!"

"It's not funny!" Entei snapped, "I saw a ghost down that hallway! If you don't believe me, go see for yourself!"

"Fine. We will," Raikou and Suicune walked away snickering, Entei trailing slowly behind.

A few minutes later, they'd reached the corner leading to Entei's section. It was silent. Dead silent. No laughter, no voices, no mist, no ghosts. Entei looked around blankly as Suicune and Raikou turned to look at him, faces serious and annoyed.

"Now…" Raikou fumed, "Aren't you happy you dragged us all the way down here for nothing?"

"But…But…But…" Entei's jaw quivered, "There was something down there with mist and…and…and voices and laughing and…and-"

"Enough," Suicune cut him off, "Knock it off. What you saw was probably just some dust from a Pidgey flying around. Get over it," she walked around him.

"If there really was something here, which I seriously doubt there was, it's gone now," Raikou shrugged, "Lie down and get some sleep. In the morning you'll have forgotten all about it."

Entei started jumping up and down like an annoyed three-year-old not getting his way, "But I know I saw something! I know I did!"

*^~^**^~^*

Suicune pranced down the hallway, grumbling to herself about how stupid male Pokemon could be. As she continued along, she heard a 'knock-knock-knock' on the wall. She stopped and stared at the wall, tilting her head to the side. 'Knock-knock-knock' it came again. She raised a paw, looked side to side, then returned it with a 'knock-knock…knock-knock'. It was silent for a moment, so she did it again. 'Knock-knock knock-knock-knock' she hit twice, then three times, awaiting an answer. It came quickly afterwards. 'Knock-knock'. She shivered and looked down the hall. A soft, scentless mist was now covering the floor, flowing from around the corner and traveling nearer. She backed away as there came a scratching, clawing sound on the ground and on the walls and a cold rush of air hit her face. She started shaking and kept backing up, but found the fog just kept moving at her. The scratching was getting louder as she moved away and something rounded the corner in front of her. Two long arms were stretched out, creating the scratching on the walls, and it scuffed its feet, scratching the ground. Suicune nearly jumped right up through the roof as she spotted two glowing red eyes.

"Sui…cu…ne…" a hard groan escaped the thing in front of her.

"YAHH!" she lunged a good six feet into the air, nearly smacking the ceiling, and flew back down the hall, hysterical laughter shrieking away behind her.

*^~^**^~^*

"AHHH!" came a high-pitched wail from down the hall.

"AHHH!" Entei returned as a figure blurred by speed rounded the corner and jumped at him, "What are you doing?!" he growled as Suicune jumped behind him and ducked down.

"I believe you, I believe you, I believe you!" she shrieked and shivered, "I believe you about the whole ghost thing! I just saw one down the hall to my room! Save me, save me, save me, save me!"

"Why'd you come down here?! He may have followed you! Why'd you lead it to me?!" he slapped her over the head with his bulky paw.

As she was about to hit him back, they saw a flashing light at the end of the hallway. It was coming from around the corner and each flash showed a shadow moving down the hall toward their corner. Entei and Suicune sat up straight and pressed their backs up against the wall. The scraping sound was there again as whatever was approaching got closer. They started whimpering as the shadow got bigger…And bigger…And bigger. As it started rounding the corner, they both screamed.

"What's all the yelling about?!" Raikou snapped as he looked around the corner, his jagged tail grazing the wall and sparks flying from his sides to light his way, "I was trying to sleep, ya' know!"

"Raikou!" Suicune sighed, "I just saw Entei's apparition! Down the hall toward my room! It was big with glowing red eyes and long, stretching arms and mist and laughing and groans! It was just like-"

She stopped short as she saw Raikou glaring at her, "You're both being idiots. Why, might I ask, am I the only rational one around here? For the last time! There's no such thing as g-"

He cut himself off on his own accord and looked down slowly. A whitish mist was billowing around his feet. Entei and Suicune heard him swallow as he turned around slowly. The fog was coming from the way to Suicune's section and was getting thicker and covering the floor more completely. Raikou started twitching and backed up a bit. A low moan echoed through the hallway and everyone shivered. A cold blast of air washed over them, chilling even Entei to the bone. Their eyes started tearing up in fright as whatever Suicune had seen started closing in on the corner. It rounded it, bright red eyes glowing violently and arms sliding along the walls to create a screeching similar to that of fingernails on a blackboard. When they saw it, the Beasts shot up straight, backs pressed up against the wall. Their fur and tails shot straight up and they screamed bloody murder.

"HEEELP!" they wailed and ran forward.

They kept their heads down and bolted forward, running along the walls and zipping out to the sides of that…thing. They just kept screaming as they ran, sliding down the hall and away from that thing as it laughed its high-pitched laugh at them. They found the closest door and ran out onto the training field, panting and gagging for air.

"What was that?" Raikou fell flat on his stomach to the ground.

"I have no idea," Entei fell over on top of him.

"I don't think we want to know," Suicune completed to pile by laying on both of them.

"Be…easts…"

"Huh?" they all looked slowly upward, "AH!"

Hissing laughs filled the entire darkened arena. The Beasts jumped to a stand and looked around at the mist filtering in the doors of the Training House. They screamed as that thing from the hallway perched on top one of the dormant spotlights on the back walls. It jumped off and soared straight for them. They split apart, running off in different directions as it landed on the light opposite the one it'd come from. It dive bombed again, flying straight at them after they regrouped. The Beasts wailed and ran for the awning they were so used to hiding under. They ducked down and cowered there as that thing flew for them again.

In the distance, a Dodrio called out its cry of dawn. They heard a gust of wind and felt a blast of cold air. Looking up, they saw nothing. They mist was gone. And so was that thing. They crawled out from under the awning and looked around blankly. They then looked at each other, sighed deeply and collapsed again.

*^~^**^~^*

Later that day, they tried asking the Elite 4 about it, but they couldn't get a word in edgewise from all the laughter. Jason thought they were crazy, Luri thought it was hilarious, Will thought it was cool, and Lance couldn't stop laughing long enough to say. The Beasts pouted away from Rainbow Mansion and sat in a circle in the center of the training hall.

"Well…" Entei started, "Now that the Elite think we're crazy…"

"Maybe we are…" Suicune shrugged, "Maybe we imagined all of it…" she looked up and saw her companions glaring at her, "…Or maybe not…"

"I've never heard of this place being haunted. Have you?" Raikou looked to the others.

"Only by us," Entei shrugged, "There are many Legends involving our death and resurrection by the Rainbow Winged Phoenix Ho-oh. Some of which pertain to this place."

"Yes, but we know we're not haunting ourselves!" Suicune flailed without cause, "Whatever that was is bigger than us! Twice our size even!"

"Calm down," Raikou tried to calm her, "What we've got to do, first of all, is find out what's causing all this."

"That's a lot easier said than done," Entei drooped, "It could be anything…What do we know about it?"

"Not much," Suicune muttered, "We know it's big enough to scratch the walls and to scratch both at once."

"That it laughs like a spastic Aipom," Entei added.

"That it likes to frequent the hallway mostly."

"That it uses mist to conceal itself."

"That it emits cold air."

"That it has glowing red eyes."

"And that it disappeared at dawn," Raikou put in.

"All the symptoms of a classic ghost," Entei grumbled.

Suicune flopped down and crossed her front legs under her chin, "So…What do we do?"

The other two Beasts facefaulted.

*^~^**^~^*

Raikou inched his way down the hall, walking as a Krabby does; sideways. He'd take a step, looked frantically side to side, then repeat the process over and over again. Little did he know it wasn't going to help him in the slightest bit. A cold blast of air came down from above, pushing his fur downward. He gagged and looked up, staring into the bottom of the bleachers. The mist was falling from the seats, dropping down around him. He whimpered as his skin started to crawl. He heard a shrill, hysterical laugh from down either side of the hall and one from above. Before he had the chance to look up again…

"Rai…kou…" a dry dirge sounded from above him.

His eyes went up, then his whole head followed. High above him, up by the ceiling, floated that thing. He twitched as it dropped to the ground beside him and stepped closer, eyes bright and angry red. He whimpered and moved away, but it kept lurching closer and closer. He was going to run, but the smoke was coming from both ends of the hallway. He kept backing farther and farther down the hall, approaching the mist behind him. He stopped backing away and ducked down as the thing jumped at him. He put his paws over his face as it soared overhead, drifting around the corner. As he opened one eye and pulled his paw from it, he watched the fog slowly disappear. He sighed and sat up, leaning against the wall.

"All right," he muttered, eyes narrowing, "I've had enough of this."

*^~^**^~^*

"Remind me again," Suicune shuttered, "Just what are we doing? And why?"

"We're going to find out just what that thing is," Raikou commented and walked along the hall.

"You got that right," Entei nodded firmly, "I can't stand not knowing anymore! I can never get any sleep!"

"Well…What are we looking for?" Suicune was all full of questions today.

"Anything that may help us identify just what this thing is," Raikou told her, scanning the hall, "This is where I saw it last night. See what you can find."

All three of them started searching the hall. They walked around slowly, carefully sniffing the ground. They found no scent whatsoever. The mist could very well have played a factor in hiding the culprit or culprits' scent or scents if, in fact, it or they was or were alive. A tad complicated, ne? Raikou kept looking around about where he'd been standing and spotted his first clue. Feeling a bit like Scooby-Doo, he watched the glowing blue object on the floor, eyes wide. As he picked it up in his clawed paw, the glowing stopped. Was that…Was that a blue feather? What happened? It vanished…

Suicune sniffed the floor to the left of Raikou, seeing something bright flashing on the floor a few feet ahead. After sniffing around a bit more, just to be sure, she walked up to it and nudged it around. It was bright and red and sparkling like live glitter. She picked it up and the sparkling stopped. A red plume? Hey…Where'd it go?

Entei was pawing at the ground to Raikou's right, wondering if there was something maybe buried that produced the mist. He wasn't having any luck and hung that idea up right away. He was about to turn around and say he'd found nothing when he spotted something shining in the pile of dirt he'd made. He reached out and pulled it out, staring at it as its glowing ceased. A bright yellow quill? But…As he held it…It disappeared.

"Did anybody else see that?" all three asked in unison.

*^~^**^~^*

The next day, the three Beasts stood in the center of the Training House, looking about nervously. They were waiting worriedly around for their little friend to show up again. Just as they started their second game of odds and evens, which was kind of interesting, having paws and not hands, a light mist billowed between them. They shivered and took a stand, backing into each other. Apparently, their spirit friend had some buddies on the other side, as this time, he wasn't alone. A pale white figure was standing on top of each light. One moaned, one shrieked and one laughed. The Beasts each faced a different direction and backed into each other, choking and shaking in a circle. The three things lifted off and soared downward.

"Here they come," Suicune crouched and covered her head.

"We're all gonna die," Entei gagged and tried to back away, but the other two wouldn't allow him to.

"I should certainly hope not," Raikou twitched and sweatdropped nervously.

The ghostly things dive bombed them with a full blast of speed. Suicune jumped up and let out a long shout, dodging the one flying for her. More mist billowed from behind it as it soared through the air. Entei and Raikou dove away, rolling to the side and letting out wails and screams.

"We're all gonna die!" Suicune shrieked, "We're all gonna die!"

"Stop that!" Raikou snapped at her.

The high-pitched wails and shrieks of their visitors hurt their ears and sent chills down their backs. As one approached Entei, he tumbled away and started running like a maniac. Suicune was again screaming, bolting away from one trailing behind her. The one following Raikou was laughing evilly. They managed to chase the Beasts under the awning by the wall and let out their nastily snickers yet again. The Beasts screamed long and hard, ducking down and covering their heads with their paws. After a few seconds, a cold breeze washed over them and the laughter got louder, yet was not as high and shrill. They looked up, seeing the spooks surrounding them. Then it hit them; red, yellow and blue.

"Oh man!" one of the 'ghosts' laughed nastily, "You guys are so gullible!"

"You fell for it hook, line and sinker!" another giggled, "Scaredy-Beasts!"

"I can't imagine you guys at Halloween!" the last grinned, "One boo and you'd soar!"

"You three…" Raikou growled deeply, "That is not funny!"

"Yes it was!" all three bellowed.

"It most certainly was not!" Suicune hissed, "You could have killed us!"

"You almost gave me a heart attack!" Entei puffed, "I could have been scared to death!"

"Oh…Calm down," one waved his arm-or rather, his wing at them, showing blue feathers, "You guys just fell for it way too easy!"

"Shut up, Articuno!" Suicune fumed, "That was a real cheap trick you played!"

"Nah!" Zapdos' yellow and black wings were exposed when he stretched, "It was great! Right, Molty?"

"Yeah, Zappo!" Moltres cheered and ruffled the feathers on his neck, "You guys fell for it like a sleeping Snorlax rolling into a pit of Ekans!"

"You guys pulled it off really well, I'm afraid to say," Entei slouched low, "How?"

"It was a great plan!" Zapdos smirked, "First, Arty here laid some dry ice and misted the area. Then Molty and I blew it where we wanted it to go. Then Arty would cover himself in mist and bubbles, light up his eyes, and go after you!"

"Then we'd sit down the hall behind you and Arty and shriek and laugh and giggle…Call out your name. Rai…kou. Sui…cu…ne. En…tei."

The Beasts growled as the Birds started laughing, "I'd spread my wings and walk along, making myself look twice as big!" Articuno spread his wings and flapped them, "And I'd throw Icy Wind at you and dig my claws in and scratch the walls! And you guys bought it so easy!"

"That's not funny," Raikou muttered lowly, "You could really have done some damage."

"Liven up!" Moltres waved his wing.

"Yeah! Live a little!" Zapdos smiled nastily.

"Get a life, most of all!" Articuno started giggling.

"We can't liven up, live a little, or get a life; we're already too dead."

"Who said that?" Suicune looked around worriedly.

"You mean it wasn't you?" Articuno asked wearily.

"No. Come on, guys! Quit playing around!" Entei snorted.

"It wasn't any of us. Honest!" Zapdos shook.

"No. It was us!"

Both the Beasts and Birds turned and looked up into the bleachers, spotting two bright white eyes staring down at them. The eyes were obviously part of a full figure. A very, very large figure. All six of them screamed wildly until hearing a familiar laugh. A deep, evil laugh. A thud and the sound of boots caused them all to shut up immediately as the prankster walked out from behind his Pokemon, followed by the three others who had been providing back-up speech for him.

"LANCE!"

Luri, Will, Jason, and Lance's Dragonite stood beside him, laughing evilly at the scowling Legendary Beasts and Birds.

*^~^*End*^~^*

Notes
Well…That was fun, wasn't it? Kind of strange, very different and all around weird! But, weird is good, so this must be…Or at least it should be. Is it? Why not be nice readers and review and tell me? Thank you! Arigato, ja ne!

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