Yep, another of my Alternatives stories, this one based off the episode New Earth.
New Man, New Feelings
Rose had kissed him. Oh, sure, at the time she had been possessed by Cassandra, but that wasn't wholly the point. Rose had kissed him.
He knew. He knew from when Cassandra had been inside his own head. While he had managed to keep his own thoughts locked away, he had been able to pick up on everything Cassandra did or said. Even whatever Cassandra thought.
And she had thought and said quite a bit. Rose liked his new body. She found it sexy. Cassandra had thought the same thing. But to suspect it and then have it told to him from a third party was hard.
He had loved her not too long ago. Even when she was being immature and selfish, he had loved her, and he had hated the thought of losing her. He still hated the thought of losing her, but he was no longer in love. He didn't think he'd ever be able to love her again. Her character wasn't one he'd be able to hold that type of deep affection for. Not in this incarnation.
He couldn't tell her that, though. If he told her, she'd either try twice as hard to get him into her bed (she had tried hard enough already, especially using the 'jealous of another man' angle) or she would leave and right now, he still needed her in his life. He was still trying to figure out who he was, and that was much easier with the person who helped him through the regeneration.
Not that it was actually Rose who had helped him through the most of it. That had been Jackie. The same Jackie who had slapped him senseless that one time, had a total turn of heart because of his sending Rose back home, in doing the right thing for all involved. It was still something he was trying to wrap his mind over.
Rose had, as he had told her right after just waking up, abandoned him. Jackie had been the one to care for him through his regeneration sickness. Sure, Rose had helped, but given the talks he had with both Jackie and Mickey before he and Rose had taken back off to time and space travel, she was too busy whining over him instead.
How was it that Mickey and Jackie, the two who barely knew him, hadn't been half as fazed and had taken him as the new Doctor without any troubles, while Rose, who knew him, was too busy sulking that he was lost, when he had been right there. Jack wouldn't have been fazed. He missed Jack. Poor Jack...
Shaking his head to clear it, erasing thoughts of that time not so long ago from his mind, the Doctor brought himself back to what really mattered right that second.
Rose had kissed him.
She was interested in this body, in the same sexual way she had desired his last.
He was no longer in love with her, and while he may be a bit more...promiscuous since the War, he wasn't interested in her sexually either. Plus he didn't have sex with Companions anyway. Standard rule he had for himself, that one, even though sometimes he was tempted to do so.
He felt himself gaining a headache, thankful that right that second Cassandra was once again back in Rose.
He was sitting next to the Face of Boe, while waiting for the rest of the cures to be handed to him. He had no idea if this plan of his would work. He didn't think it should, but he usually got lucky on things like that.
All he knew was keeping busy wasn't helping his jumbled thoughts.
Rose had kissed him.
"Doctor, here," Cassandra in Rose stated, giving over the last of the cures, and he strapped them to his body, noting the glint of desire in brown eyes.
"Good!" He didn't even bother forming a more wordy answer, just took off for the nearest elevator and opened it.
Cassandra was soon gripping onto him tightly, screaming in his ear. Then he jumped down after giving her instructions on what to do.
When he felt the cure water start to pour over his suit, he urged in the diseased 'Stock' and hoped his plan worked.
He had been ecstatic when it had, bouncing around and feeling happy for the first time since his last regeneration. Cassandra in Rose seemed more awkward than anything else, and he could understand that. To both Cassandra and Rose, he wasn't like this.
But for the first time since regenerating into this form, he felt like he was truly being himself. He felt real, he felt good. He felt like he could do anything, and it was all right. And then Cassandra decided to die, which was the right choice for her, the right choice in the end. He knew the cycle would repeat itself, but at least he knew that in the end, Cassandra would do the good thing for herself and others around her.
The only one who hadn't changed by the whole experience was Rose.
Even then, that wasn't true. Rose had changed, but only in the fact that she felt awkward and unknowing about whether or not he felt he was kissing another woman when she had kissed him.
In the end, he came out of that little adventure with the same thing on his mind since it happened.
Cassandra was just an excuse. Cassandra was acting on both her own loneliness at not being able to touch anyone, and Rose's feelings for him.
It truly had been Rose that had kissed him.
And he was truly glad he hadn't kissed her back.
