Author's Note: I feel I must apologize in some way for this story. It was late but the muse wouldn't stop pestering me and my fingers couldn't type fast enough to keep up. I realize that Kagome isn't entirely in character, but I did try. Any and all critiques and/or suggestions are most welcome.
Disclaimer: Takahashi Rumiko is the creator of Inuyasha and is the copyright holder. My muse, which often operates independently of me (insert tears here), borrowed the characters for its own entertainment.
ڿ
The Last Shikon Priestess
ڿ
I have to destroy the Sacred Jewel. It's the only way to free Midoriko and end the threat to innocent humans and demons. But there's just one problem.
I must a make a pure, unselfish wish.
In the time I have traveled with Inuyasha, Miroku, Sango and Kirara, and Shippo, I've been trying to think of a wish that would be unselfish. Ask for all the victims of Naraku to be revived? Wish for peace between demons, humans, and half-bloods?
All this power and I don't know what to use it for. There's something funny about that.
I have to hurry, though, because I just know there is a demon out there ready to become another Naraku. I won't risk a repeat of our journey. It's time for Sango and Miroku to enjoy a life together, for Shippo to have something resembling a childhood - and for Inuyasha to stop being injured protecting us. Which brings me back to the all-important matter of finding the right wish.
I've been wondering about the definitions of selfish and unselfish. Selfish is gaining while giving nothing, right? So unselfish is gaining while giving something of equal or even greater value? All the possible wishes I think of, all the musings of my friends – family – involves me simply gaining. I must sacrifice something to make the wish that will forever dispel the Jewel. And I believe I have the answer. I haven't told the others because saying it aloud makes it real. It shames me to think I would rather maintain the constant threat of injury or death than act on my answer, to be aware that I had a way of making them safe and instead chose to stay.
Because that is what I must do. I have to return to my own era and wish for the Sacred Jewel of Four Souls to destroy itself, also destroying the connection between modern Japan and feudal Japan. I will be cut off from my feudal family for good.
Oh God, I want to stay with them! I can't imagine a life without Shippo proudly showing me a new trick he created, Miroku flirting with Sango and Sango slapping him back while hiding a pleased smile, Kirara rubbing away an itch using a tree, and Inuyasha— Inuyasha keeping his eyes open, ears pricked, and nose sniffing for danger to keep us from harm; my protector. I'll miss Kouga and Rin and Sesshomaru and Kohaku and Myoga and Kaede and all the friends we've made! But leaving Inuyasha is the greatest agony.
I want to be his wife. I love him. I love him so deeply that I would kill myself for him if necessary. In a sense, I'll be doing exactly that. Demons can live for hundreds of years, but Inuyasha is half human... I want to hope he is alive five hundred years from now, but...
I know Inuyasha will be beyond pissed when he discovers this final page of my diary. I'm leaving it here so that he will know why I have done it.
Inuyasha, I am so sorry. It tears at me to do this, but I have made my choice. I can't be selfish, not when it comes to your life. Please forgive me for... I can't stay, but I am leaving this paper so you have something physical to cherish besides the prayer beads that I will never now be able to remove. You will always have my heart. Please do not be lonely. And don't you dare get in silly fights with Sesshomaru or Kouga! I WILL know and I WILL s-i-t you until— well, maybe not. Make sure Shippou is safe and raised well. And check up on Sango and Miroku once in a while, too. Please?
I have so much to say and not enough room on the paper. I've dragged this out as long as I can. Alright, Kagome, face up! Stand straight! I will be strong!
Love to everyone,
especially Inuyasha,
Higurashi Kagome