Sleepless at 2am
My hands feel the urge to strangle you.
The time creeps up again, and my eyes snap open. My body is cold with sweat, and I look at you, so loose and relaxed on the other side of the bed, you blonde hair spread out around you. My own fingers could testify to how soft that hair was. How supple your muscles were. The feel of you was still burned against my skin.
I lay there for a few moments, trying to recall what I had been dreaming about as I stare at the clock. It glared the time at me. Always the same, always around this time. My dream, of you, soft in my hands, my legs straddling your hips, your eyes closed. And that goddamn rose no where in sight.
But I can't bring myself to understand that lie.
I turn, fixated on your face as it glows in the city lights. Your expression is so peaceful. Much the same as my dream. I've said I wanted to kill you. But now I questioned how far I really wanted to go. Of course I love you. It's something I repeat, a mantra. I'm scared that it's not the truth. It makes me want to strangle it from you, hear you say those words.
My fingers twitch, and I grip the sheets, afraid. You're there, so vulnerable. I almost can't stop myself from moving. After all I hate you. That's how I shall justify it. I've always hated you. You make me burn beneath my skin. You keep spilling tea all over my embroidery. I'm sure, it will be a brighter world when you are gone. I hate you.
Wouldn't it be nice to believe that?
I had a dream where I took you by the throat. I remember the way your breathing had sounded. Here, in real life, it sounds much better. So soft and steady. Soon to be harsh. A breeze ruffles the curtains. I close my eyes. I don't want to look. After all, I hate you. I squeeze. Tight. Your hips jerk, and I feel your eyes on me. But I don't want to look. If I hate you, I have to stand strong by that.
I dig in with my nails, wishing I could squeeze tighter, wishing the tears would stop. I get the sudden feeling I don't even remember what my dream had been about. I look at you, my face hot. Yours is red from the sudden rush of blood. Your hands rub my sides, pull me down for a kiss. Are you a fool? Do you think I want to taste you? I hate you.
I truly believe that after this is over, sleep will come.
You keep kissing me. And now my cheeks can testify to the softness of you blonde locks. Now my hips can vouch for the pleasure your fingers cause. Now my legs will know something of your warmth. You....I don't want to lose you. But if I have to, would I rather I take your life with my own hands? I'm afraid. So very afraid. I hate you. That's my justification.
Your face glows in the light, and you glance at the clock, and whisper softly in my ear "It's 3am, Mon Cheri, go back to sleep." You're not afraid that I'll try it again. Your hands are cool, calloused from sword hilts and gun handles. Mine are the same. You hold me tight against your naked skin. I hate you. But at least you relieve me of these nightmares.
If I see you dead. It'll be my heart left broken.
OWARI
I hope you enjoyed, I'm not used to this couple. It was based off Rin Kagamine's Meltdown, which is disturbing in it's own right. Reveiw please!