At times, Fay wished to be a bird. Birds were fast flying and so very free. They were not bound by duty or knowledge or the obligatory burden of being a part of something much greater. The gulls could glide over the oceans and fly high over the mountains; do whatever they desired.
Simplicity at it's finest.
The magician wished for flight; to spread his wings and just fly away, leaving the world behind him. Fay knew of different worlds, he himself had the ability to travel between them, but was forever bound by the chains of obligation set in place by his king (and the man in shadows who had saved him and cursed him for eternity at the same time). The chains did not release him, even as he traveled between the worlds; it wasn't something he could easily escape. The chains teased and tested him, allowing him to have that small bit of freedom, but eventually, they would pull taut, and bring him crashing down. .
When Fay had started traveling with the Princess, he had sometimes wished to be Makona. The small creature had a sort of knowledgeable innocence which made the blonde adore it far more than he thought he could, and perhaps envy it as well, for something that Fay himself never truly got a chance to experience. Its' kindness and gentleness was something the magician could hardly understand: how such a small creature could touch the hearts of so many people. He wished for an opportunity to do such a thing(not realizing at the time that he didn't need to become Makona to do it). But Fay also knew that Makona had a twin that lived with the Witch, and that really wouldn't do, since Fay could never bring himself to replace the brother he loved more than anything and couldn't find a way to let go.
In between wishing to be Makona,, or a bird, or the millions of other things he wished to be, Fay wished to become a cloud in the sky. So pure and light and passive and free, but completely untouchable; invulnerable to the many things trying to get a hold of it. And even with that, still existing and there. It was something that the man knew he would never be able to achieve on his own. However, clouds were dirtied, more often than not, by fumes and poison and the ignorance and mistakes of mankind. Just as he was, already.
And then they reached the city in which acid rained down from the heavens. Everything changed; the chains suffocated him and Makona lost it's innocence and Fay started wishing to simply not exist. To disappear from the world, all of the worlds on which he ever existed; to simply vanish. Then he wouldn't have to face the gut-wrenching agony and consequences of his own actions, nor would he have to face the sickening reality of the ninja's decision. He wouldn't have to watch her suffer, the only one who stopped him from simply willing himself out of being.
Fay could continue wishing, but he was far too wise and far too old to believe that these wishes would be granted, (no matter how many times he could wish upon the shooting star) or that he would act upon granting them (wish on a thousand! It wouldn't make a difference.). They would remain part of a distant and foggy daydream that he would allow himself once in a while.
Because these wishes were simply distractions from what Fay truly wished for, which was the one wish that could not be granted at any cost.
Fin
I find myself missing the Fay-angst.
Comments and criticisms very welcome :)