Irreplaceable

Chapter One

John laid face down on the couch. 3 damned years of being alone. He sobbed into the pillow that rested underneath him. "Sherlock..." he mumbled "Come back..." He looked at the photograph of his dead colleague that sat on the desk. His mobile that was resting on the couch arm started to ring. "Call from: Sherlock". John threw the phone at the wall and curled into the fetal position. Someone who'd found his phone probably, or a friend of his. The phone stopped ringing after a minute.

Only a moment later a text message was received. "New Text Message From: Sherlock" the phone read. John Watson was hesitant to read it. He opened it. "Come downstairs. SH" it read. John had no time for his idiot friends trying to cheer him up by dressing up like Sherlock and taking him out for coffee. He wanted the real Sherlock. His Sherlock. The one he fell in love with all those years ago.

He remembered that first time they met. Looking into his blue eyes. Hearing the intelligence in his voice. His fingers brushing against John's ever so slightly, sending a chill through him. John got up and slowly made his way to the bedroom.

He opened the drawer to his bedside table and looked at the scarf, the one John had bought Sherlock as a Christmas gift. The photo he had of the two of them. A button that had fallen off of Sherlock's coat after the fall. And lastly, the small black box that held a gold engagement band. He was going to present it to Sherlock on his birthday, he was going to finally tell him how much he loved him. Sherlock never payed any attention to John though, not in that way. John slammed the drawer shut and began to sob into the pillow on the bed. He rolled over so he was laying on his back, and sobbed louder, covering his mouth. "Sherlock please!" he begged as he stared out the window, "Please! Come back! Please!" He fell to the floor, on his knees, sobbing on the ground.

"Idiot, I'm fine." Sherlock spoke as he leaned against the door frame of John's room. John turned to look at him. He was utterly frightened as he stared at Sherlock Holmes, the one who had died 3 years ago, stand in the door of his bedroom.

"That's not possible." John muttered. "You're dead."

"Obviously I'm not. I was just hiding."

"Why?"

"Various reasons. None I can tell you." Sherlock said as he crossed his arms.

John quickly stumbled to his feet and hugged Sherlock hard. "I've missed you so much!" John pulled back quickly and punched Sherlock across the face. "Never, ever leave me again!"

Sherlock fell to the ground and looked up at his former flatmate. "John! What was that-"

John cut him off, "You left me! For 3 years! With no one to talk to! No one to look forward to seeing! I was alone! For three damned years!" John sobbed.

"John... I had to, you think I wanted to?" Sherlock said quietly.

"Well, no of course not... But I'm still mad at you for leaving for three years! You couldn't at least tell me you were alive?!"

"John, I wanted to, but I just couldn't. It's just something I couldn't do. I'm not even supposed to be here today."

"Where were you?" John asked, "Where in the damned world were you that you couldn't even call me?"

"I can't tell you. It's confidential." Sherlock frowned. "I really wish I could tell you."

"Oh so now you're keeping secrets from me? Who am I going to tell, Sherlock?!" John snapped back.

"I... I don't know." Sherlock mumbled.

"Then tell me." John insisted, "I'm not going to tell anyone."

"I was in hiding in... a disclosed location." Sherlock whispered. "From Moriarty's men."

"Oh... Why are you whispering?" John said as he helped Sherlock up. "It doesn't matter just never leave me alone again." John pleaded as he pulled Sherlock into a hug.

"I... I won't. God, John, pull yourself together. Why did this upset you as much as it did? I thought you'd be over it by now."

John looked Sherlock in the eyes. He had finally stopped crying. "Because I love you."

"You-"

"I love you. Like love you, love you. I love you like a boyfriend. I want to be yours. I always have." John spilled.

"Oh... I... Wow.." Sherlock gulped, "Why did you never tell me? The better question is, why didn't I know?"

"I never told you cause you don't feel the same." John sighed.

"Who said I don't feel the same? I do. I was afraid to tell you for the same reason. "I came back here for a reason, John." Sherlock confessed. He fumbled in the pocket of his trench coat briefly before pulling out a box similar to the one in John's bedside table, and handed it to John. "That's it. That's the reason. I came to tell you I love you."

John opened the box to see a silver wedding band with an engraving on the inside. 'To John Hamish Watson, Love Sherlock.' John gasped and looked up at his newly confessed lover. Tears threatened to fall from his eyes. "Sherlock..." He ran back to his bedside table to get the engagement ring he had bought all those years ago and handed it to Sherlock. Sherlock opened the box and smiled at the ring below and slipped it on his left ring finger. John did the same with the one Sherlock gave him. Tears of happiness rolled down their faces. They stared in each other's eyes.

Slowly, tenderly, Sherlock leaned down and kissed John, his had cupping the blond's cheek, the other on his back. The kiss was passionate and slow, and soon John began sucking on Sherlock's upper lip. Sherlock let a moan slip out as he pushed John onto the bed, never breaking the kiss.

They went like this for a while, hands exploring each other, lips intertwined, tongues flicking. Sherlock began to take off his coat, scarf, shirt... It was all very overwhelming for John...

John slipped off his cardigan and continued kissing the detective, slowly and passionately. Sherlock began unbuttoning John's over-shirt and lifted his undershirt over his head... "Wait." John protested. This was all moving very fast for him, "I'm not ready."

"What do you mean you're not ready?" Sherlock questioned.

"I just don't think I'm ready to have sex with you yet." John confessed, "I'm sorry. I love you though."

"Its alright, I understand," Sherlock lifted John's head and kissed him tenderly, "Why don't we sleep a little? It's late."

They looked over to the clock. 10:33 pm. "Alright, stay with me all night.. Please, be here in the morning." John mumbled.

"I'm not going anywhere, John. I'm here." Sherlock laid down, John next to him, cuddling into his shoulder. Sherlock wrapped his arm around his lover. "I'm not going anywhere, darling."

"Thank you." John fought tears, he feared this was all a dream or hallucination, but yet he was happy. He had the man he loved again. "I love you." he mumbled as he drifted to sleep in Sherlock's arms.

"I love you too." Sherlock finally said as he kissed John's forehead and fell asleep as well...

To be continued?