Commentary 7.7.12: I started this fanfic way back in late 2007 - despite a lack of updates, I have every intent to finish it. There's a lot of stuff in here that's outdated or just plain reeks of early fic syndrome, but I'm not rewriting it - too much work, too little interest. There's a lot of stuff in here I'm not proud of anymore, but it's also my earliest half-decent effort, so it isn't going anywhere.
One day I'll finish it. One day.
"Where are we?" asked the voice of a lonely young Kenny McCormick. He looked to see a wheelchair near him, the shape of a short large-headed boy unconscious in it. He crawled off the dirty ground to the chair. "Timmy, no, please, Timmy, no don't die, you can't, not now, Timmy, no-" he said, as memories of yesterday filled Kenny's mind.
"I wonder what the future will be like, guys." said a curious Stan Marsh. "I'm going to be a TV Talk Show host!" said the obnoxious voice of the boy known as Eric Cartman. "Oooh, I bet Stan'll marry Wendy!" said Kyle. "And he'll fuck her too!" joked Cartman. "Shut the fuck up you guys." said Kenny's muffled voice. Stan wasn't laughing either.
"The future will be much different." said Kenny. "How do you know?" asked Cartman angrily. "Well, we can hook up a Time Machine to Timmy again." said Kyle. "Thanks, sir OBVIOUS!" said Kenny, who was on the ground in a second due to Kyle's swift punch in the groin. "Stan, finish him!" and then Stan stepped on Kenny's leg.
Suddenly the sound of a wheelchair was there. Timmy was standing, his strawberry-blonde hair waving in the wind. "Timmeh!" he says. "Yes, greetings Timmy." says Cartman. "Can I persuade you, to let us see THE FUTURE?" asked Cartman, holding a wad of cash.
"TIMMAH!" says Timmy. Cartman then took out a small computer chip and put it on the wheelchair. "Timmah!" as Timmy reached for the button to move the chair, Cartman grabbed it. "Wait. Kenny go with him." said Cartman. "Why me?" said Kenny's muffled voice.
"Pffft, you're expendable. I can't send Kyle because he's a jew, they'd kill him and we wouldn't get a report." said Cartman, who then yelped as Kyle punched his groin. "What about you?" asked Stan. "Same reason as you - We have more important matters to attend to!" said Cartman.
"Ready?" asked Kyle. Kenny's muffled voice returned, "Ready! Send this motherfucker to 2027!" said Kenny, just as Kyle pulled the wheelchair back far enough and let it go. At a great speed it hurtled forward and disappeared in a vortex of space.
Now, Kenny was in the future, sitting next to Timmy. "Timmy, please, no, don't die, please, no, Timmy." said Kenny, kneeling by his fallen friend. "T-t-timmeh." said the boy's voice. Kenny cradled Timmy's head. "It's okay, Timmy. It's okay. You're going to be alright!" said Kenny, forcing back a cry.
Kenny finally looked at his surroundings. There was fog, and he was on cold, wet, white ground. He must be on a Tundra. "HELLO? HELP! MY FRIEND IS DYING! SOMEONE FUCKING HELP ME!" he cried. Kenny looked, and saw nothing. He continued screaming for help.
The minutes felt like long, grueling hours, until finally, he heard footsteps. "Hello? HELLO? WHO ARE YOU?" cried Kenny. He looked at an average-sized man, clearly wearing a brown coat, and blue pants. He wore a blue hat with a red puffball on it.
"Stan?" asked Kenny. The fog cleared a bit, revealing the face of Stan, but he was older. He must be in his twenties now. "It..it...it worked..." said Kenny, before he fell face first into the snow, falling unconscious next to Timmy.
Kenny awoke on a soft surface. He was almost naked, but he felt his underwear, and a warm blanket coiled around him. He looked up to see the face of a woman, probably in her twenties, with long, black hair, and a pink beret.
"Who are you?" asked Kenny, half-heatedly. "Holy shit, it worked! It's me, Kenny, you know, Wendy." said the high-pitched voice. "Me and Stan got married years ago." said Wendy Marsh. Kenny looked over to see Timmy in a bed covered by a warm blanket being cared for by Stan. "Where are we?" asked Kenny.
"I's 2027, and you're at the Marsh family home." said Wendy. "Well, Marsh and Broflovski." she added. "Kyle moved in with us, he couldn't stay with Ike, because Ike didn't want his 'abusive trash' by his children, or so he says."
"Go Timmeh Go!" said Timmy. "Is Timmy still okay?" asked Kenny. "Well, yes, he has a few bruises. He was fine though. Just crippled as usual." said Wendy. "Is Shelley here?" asked Kenny. Wendy waved her head. "No, she moved in with your family. You see, she married Kevin, and they got good jobs and-"
"Did it help they didn't have another mouth to feed?" said Kenny. Wendy gave him a dirty look. "Timmy's hungry, honey." called Stan. "Ask Kyle." said Wendy, annoyed. Kyle's voice, a bit deeper, came back. "Dammit, took them a while to come."
Kyle walked in with a tray, on which was cereal. "Timmah!" said Timmy, as he began eating it. "Libalaw libalaw Timmah!" said Timmy. Kenny smiled. "Hey Kyle." he said. Kyle looked over, "Oh, hey Kenny." said Kyle.
"So, what happened to fatass?" asked Kenny. "Easy." replied Stan. "He went to Hollywood and did exactly what he said he would, until...". There was a brief silence, before Kyle rolled his eyes angirly and said, "The Jew episode. They cancelled his show after Episode Thirty aired, and now he lives alone."
"What happened to Liane?" asked Kenny, smiling as he called an adult by their first name. " She died from a drug overdose about a year ago, right before the episode. Ever since then Cartman's been a gothish kind of guy." said Stan. "And what happened to me?" asked Kenny.
There was a long pause. The silence disturbed Kenny. Kyle's jewfro and his long red hair, turned away. Wendy gave a sad look. Stan simply was lost in space. "Uh-oh, I don't like the looks of this." said Kenny. Stan and Kyle turned sad as well. "Oh my god, they killed me." said Kenny. They all nodded.
To be continued...