So I was on tumblr and someone (negritaaa) said that they would love to read a Samcedes fic with Without You from Rent. So I decided to write a song fic because this idea got me inspired. I know I have been ignoring my story Dime a Day, but I promise a nice update soon. Hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee
Read, Review, and Enjoy!
She started thinking about him again. Sam. Her ex-boyfriend. Her friend. Her first…No he would never be that. She had Shane, her sweet, caring, and loving boyfriend. When Sam left her in the rain that July day, Shane was there to pick up the pieces. He gave her space whenever she cried or whenever she looked into the distance at something. Something. What did she look at? Or better yet, who did she look for? He would never be back. He would never return to pick the pieces up; to start over. The Troubletones turned into her outlet to get away from Shane and her thoughts that revolved around Sam. She absentmindedly started to hum a tune from one of her and Kurt's favorite musicals that she would watch with him all the time when they hung out.
Without you,
the ground thaws,
the rain falls,
the grass grows.
She headed to the bathroom to brush her hair.
Without you,
the seeds root,
the flowers bloom,
the children play.
The stars gleam,
the poets dream,
the eagles fly,
without you.
She walked out the bathroom to spot her special teddy bear on her bed. It wasn't just any bear, it was Calvin, the bear he won for her on that memorable night at the carnival.
The earth turns,
the sun burns,
but I die,
without you.
She smiled at the bear but then frowned. It had been months since she talked to...Sam. Was it that hard for her to say his name? It shouldn't have been. When she closed her eyes at night, the first image she would see was him, not Shane. She was beginning to believe that this was a sign. However, she ignored it. She ignored it like she ignored the painful feeling of her heart being crushed. She was just stressed. That was it, this headache that was forming was just pure stress. She needed to lye down.
Without you,
the breeze warms,
the girl smiles,
the cloud moves.
He saw her. Like every day for the past few weeks since he came back to Lima, he saw her. She was so far away from him. She stood by her locker with Santana and Britney, smiling at them. She looked so happy. She looked beautiful. She was always beautiful. Sam watched as she turned her attention to him, who was all the way down the hallway. He smiled at her and she quickly turned back to Santana, ignoring him.
Without you,
the tides change,
the boys run,
the oceans crash.
The crowds roar,
the days soar,
the babies cry,
without you.
He missed her. He missed her in his arms. Those summer nights when they would go to the forest preserve, much to her dismay since there were mosquitoes, and sat by the small streams to get away from the real world and just enjoy each other's company. He would wrap her up in a purple blanket that he found cheap at a thrift store and kissed her, making sure she kept "warm". There were days they would sing together while cooking in the kitchen so that his family would have a home cooked meal for once. He also missed the days were they would sit on her couch "watching" movies. He smiled at that thought. They never really got through a whole James Bond movie without his hand all the way in her shirt, not having enough of the smooth skin she produced for him. He even thought about that day at the carnival. That time at the tilt-a-whirl; The way she gripped onto him and hugged him close. The way she looked up at him when she realized what she did, and the moment when he kissed her. After that moment, he easily got her a teddy bear which he insisted that she name Calvin so that instead of thinking about the average Calvin Kline models, she would think about him as her personal one since he would never forget that time in her bedroom.
The moon glows,
the river flows,
but I die,
without you.
She was shocked when she saw that the only spot left was next to Sam at Glee club. She looked around and saw that everyone was avoiding her gaze. She signed at walked up to the very back of the bleachers and sat down next to Sam. Since his return, her whole life started to turn upside down. She didn't know where to turn because he would be there, smiling, declaring his war for her heart again. It was too late though. She was with Shane. It became her mantra every day and every night. You are with Shane. You are with Shane. You are with-
"This is a surprise. What brings you to sit next to me?" Sam smiled down at her.
"This was your doing isn't it?" Mercedes whispered.
Sam looked away from her to glance around the room. Mercedes watched as Finn and Rory gave him a thumbs up and Santana smirked. She heard Sam's unforgettable chuckle and turned back to look at him.
"Looks like New Directions decided to help me without really telling me." Sam said to her.
"I don't want them to interfere."
"Interfere with what? To be honest, there is nothing to interfere with since I don't need them to win your heart."
"My heart is not a trophy Samuel."
"You're right. It's not a trophy. But it would mean the world to me if I had it back since most of mine is still attached to yours."
"Maybe you do need their help. They could help you lay off the corny pick-up lines."
"But you love it." Mercedes didn't respond. She just looked straight ahead to the front of the classroom and tried not to smile. He was still himself. He hadn't changed a bit. Smoother? Yes definitely. Hotter? Well he was always hot. But with his new mature air he modeled, made him even more than he actually was. She always had chills thinking about it.
The world revives
Colors renew
But I know blue,
only blue,
lonely blue,
within me blue
He was upset that he couldn't touch her. Hug her. Kiss her. Her soft lips. Her plump soft lips that he dreamed about every night since he first saw her. She never knew it, but the first time he ever saw her, she glowed. It was over a year ago when he first joined the Football team. He saw her on the bleachers laughing with her friends. He was talking to Finn and Mike when he saw her. Like he was calling to her with his mind, she looked up at him and smiled. He hoped she could truly read minds so that she could hear him say hello to her. She looked at him confused and then smiled shyly as she looked down at her hands. He knew they couldn't be together. At east that's what he thought. He was a football player who needed a cheerleader on his arm. Boy was he wrong.
Without you,
the hand gropes,
the ear hears,
the pulse beats.
When she got home from school that day after singing with Tina, Rachel, and Santana to Mr. Schue about an option to propose to Miss. Pillsbury, she ran to her bedroom and started to cry. Why was it always Sam? She was sick of him. She was sick of Shane. Heck, she was sick of everyone in New Directions. She slammed her door and jumped on her bed, face down. She grabbed her pillow and screamed. How could this be happening to her? She had a plan. She was going to be with Shane and have a family and win herself a Grammy. She had everything set. She was starting to forget about him. She turned to her left side and saw Calvin. Reaching out for him, she started crying again. She pulled him into a hug, bringing her back to those July days and nights when she cried her eyes out when she wasn't doing applications for Stanford, NYU, and some of her other top schools. Something snapped in her mind like it did when she sang earlier. Why, out of all things that were pushed back into the debts of her closet, did she keep Calvin out? He was an important memory when it came to Sam. It brought back thoughts of the tilt-a-whirl and the love she saw in his eyes when he looked at her. She leaned her head down to Calvin's and there she smelled the faint scent that was purely Sam. Without realizing it, she cried harder than she has ever cried before and hugged onto Calvin tightly.
Without you,
the eyes gaze,
the legs walk,
the lungs breathe.
When Rachel sang her song in Glee, his mind was only on Mercedes. He turned around to look at her and was surprised to see her looking at him, smiling. His heartbeat started to race but his face was serious. She had to realize that to him, she was his past, present, and future. She was the one that when you heard a love song, that was the first person who came into mind. She understood him. She laughed with him, not at him. She never wanted him to change who he was. To her, he was perfect. They belonged together just like the song said.
The mind churns
The heart yearns
The tears dry,
without you.
Life goes on,
but I'm gone.
Cause I die,
without you.
When Mercedes came out of the girl's locker room, she saw Sam waiting across from the door. He looked up and smiled at her.
"Good job today." He said walking towards her.
"Yeah you too Sam. That was a great idea." She told him as she headed towards her locker with him in tow.
"You know it was all for you."
Mercedes stopped and turned around to look at Sam.
"I mean sure I gave the idea to Mr. Schue to do this, but this was all for you as well. It's not a proposal or anything, but it was a gesture of love from me to you. I just wanted you to know that I'm gone without you. Without you, life may go on and everything, but a little bit of me dies without you and your heart. I may be only 18, but I know love when I see it."
Mercedes stayed silent as she stared at Sam. She was still stuck on when he said her favorite line from Without You. She gathered herself together and went back to walking to her locker.
"I'm not giving up 'Cedes. I love you too much to let you slip through my fingers." Sam said. Mercedes didn't realize that she was wearing a shy smile on her face. Sam always remembered that smile. It was his favorite since it screamed 'You have me hooked and I can't believe it'. She closed her locker and told him that she would see him on Monday. As she walked to her car, she started to hum the last few lines of the song until she smiled even wider at the last line. Because Sam was right, she couldn't live without someone like him by her side. She would just have to take things slowly until she was able to admit out loud that he already had her heart. That it had always been his to begin with.
Without you