Dark of the Fall
In the year 219, Wei and Wu collaborated to defeat the legendary Guan Yu. During this time of alliance, a diplomatic stay leads to friendship...and one unforgettable night of passion. Cao Ren x Lu Meng, rated for explicit sexual content.
The game was over, but the man across the table did not yet realize it. He scratched his beard and pored over the array of black and white pieces, searching for some way out of the trap.
At last, Cao Ren tossed up his hands with a shrug. "That's it. I'm finished. This is why I leave strategy to others."
Lu Meng smiled. "Take some credit. You confounded me for a while."
"Perhaps you could consider that my specialty."
"I already do. Few others could have matched your leadership at Fancheng."
Cao Ren looked past him into a corner of the room. "Please, let us keep our minds off such unpleasant matters."
Lu Meng nodded and cleared the board for another round. With a thousand men to start with and every volunteer he could find, Cao Ren had defended the flooded, starving city from Guan Yu's armies until help came from the outside world. Most commanders of Wei would eagerly brag about such an achievement. Ren seemed to be haunted by it. His dark eyes, which revealed little of his thoughts, had clouded over even further like the cold gray waters that nearly swallowed Fancheng whole.
Apart from the occasional click of stones on the wooden board, the room was as quiet as a study. Other silent men would have set Lu Meng on edge. He found Cao Ren's taciturn nature refreshing. It was a welcome change of pace to spend time with a guest who preferred a friendly game of weiqi to boisterous carousing. Some of Meng's colleagues could stand to adopt a similar attitude, such as that silly pirate who hated to take orders and regularly ran into battle half-naked.
Fellow men of Wei could definitely take note. The heir to the throne, Cao Pi, would have complained about everything from the wine to the furniture in the well-appointed guest chambers in which they now sat. Cao Ren did not even care to display his status. He wore unadorned clothing made of plain fabric. His hair was gathered into its traditional bun without any headgear typical of a prestigious commander. Apart from occasions when custom called for ornate indications of rank, Ren had dressed in this manner throughout his diplomatic stay. It could be difficult to believe that he belonged to the same family as some of his arrogant and aristocratic relatives.
A well-planned sequence of turns forced Cao Ren into a corner that had him scratching his shaggy beard again. It looked soft, unlike the perpetual layer of prickles that Lu Meng had put up with since his teenage years.
What an odd path for his thoughts to ramble down.
Lu Meng tried to think of some possible next moves - anything that would keep his face its normal color - but his mind kept on wandering. Cao Ren was an interesting study in contrasts. In various regards, his presence reflected the solid nature of his battlefield might. The stocky, broad-shouldered man typically carried himself with the firm confidence of one who lived by rules and procedure. Yet the rock was not rigid. He pondered his next turn in a comfortable slouch, square chin resting on a fisted hand. There was a gentleness about the thoughtful set of his mouth, the calmly arched eyebrows, the narrowed eyes studying the board.
Those eyes lit up as he captured a spot that Lu Meng had not noticed before. "You thought you had me, didn't you?"
"Oh, it took you that long to find the opening? I was trying to let you win."
"Come on now." A laugh. "I would expect a better excuse from a strategist."
As Lu Meng looked for another trap - one that would do its job this time - he mentally replayed that perceptive move. Cao Ren had placed his piece quite delicately. One wouldn't expect such thick-fingered hands to be as dexterous as they were. Meng began to wonder what else they were capable of and forced his mind onto other subjects before the thought could develop any further. He focused on the game as if returning to war, and then he tried to hide that notion away as well. Wei and Wu would someday be at each other's throats once again. To pretend otherwise would be naive, and his military career had been long and arduous enough to cure him of such foolish hopes. This time of peace was therefore even more precious. No point in wasting it on concerns about the future.
Lu Meng finally decided upon a space. "You're better at this than you let on."
"Hardly. It is more a matter of stubbornness than anything else."
Stubborn was right. Zhou Yu and his army had taken an entire year to run this man out of Nanjun. It would be a sore subject of discussion for either, as Wei had lost Jiangling city and Wu had lost one of its finest when Yu perished afterward. Still, there was something to be said for Cao Ren's tenacity.
A familiar cacophony of bawdy lyrics and tuneless hollering echoed from somewhere down the hall. The disobedient and occasionally shirtless Chen Yao was out on the prowl with a gang of friends that he had recently recruited.
Cao Ren got up and shut the door, which somewhat dampened the noise. "Isn't it a bit early to be getting into the wine?"
"Not for those fellows. They stagger out of bed with pounding skulls and complain all morning. Somehow they forget this by nightfall."
"Give them time. They will learn to remember."
Lu Meng took another turn. "I hope so." Chen Yao was quite reminiscent of Gan Ning, a brash and erratic marauder who had cleaned up his act and grown into a skilled leader. As in Ning's early days of service to Wu, Meng had his doubts about the former brigand's potential. "Yao cares greatly for the thrill of the fight, not so much for the responsibilities of a soldier. Still, he does show sense once in a while."
"Any sense at all is enough for a start."
"Do you believe so?"
"I once acted as he did, a long time ago."
Lu Meng couldn't stop a surprised laugh. "You? I would have never guessed."
Cao Ren shrugged. "I went to much effort to leave that boy behind."
As the game proceeded, Lu Meng tried to imagine his opponent as a young ruffian. It was difficult to picture this placid man swaggering around with a barrel of bravado and a barely reined temper. Curiosity finally got the better of him.
"May I ask just how you misbehaved?"
"Responding to insults with fists. Following the lead of a cousin who seemed to command respect by intimidating others. Above all, acting from impulse rather than measured thought."
Lu Meng nodded. "That sounds familiar."
"Strange, was it not? To demonstrate power, I picked on the weak. To find my own way, I tagged along with someone far less sensible than my elders. I only learned strength and independence when I developed a habit of thinking before doing."
"Certainly. Such restraint is part of maturity. Yao does not understand this. From what I gather, he fears that he would become a dull old man like me."
Cao Ren laughed. "Is that how he refers to you?"
Lu Meng smiled wryly.
A direct look. "I assure you, you are anything but dull."
The game went on in silence as Lu Meng turned that last line over and over in his mind, capturing spaces without paying much attention to the board. Tokens blurred into images of Cao Ren riding alongside him on horseback and sitting nearby during meetings and meals, leading Meng to wonder if the envoy wanted more than friendship. Wary of reading too much into cordial intentions, he had shelved this dangerous hope.
Until now, when Cao Ren's liquid eyes had pierced through him with an unmistakable glimmer. Young warriors sometimes showed this sort of light in their open faces, a desire beyond simple admiration for a trusted mentor. The expression was not much different in the eyes of a grown man.
"Are you feeling all right?"
His discomfort wasn't that apparent. Was it?
"Why do you ask?"
Cao Ren indicated the table with a grin. "It appears that you let me win after all."
That was it. Nothing more, nothing less.
Or maybe not. Those once-guarded eyes had been left vulnerable. As Lu Meng studied the board and realized that Cao Ren had indeed won, he could feel them yet again. And he would go mad if they continued on like this.
Regardless of what came of this encounter, both men had more than enough discretion to keep it quiet. That was all the prudence they needed. Kingdoms would rise, and kingdoms would fall. Tonight, there was only companionship, contentment, a candle defiant against the dark of impending winter. Better to allow it a chance to shine than to agonize over what might have been.
"Care to quit while you're ahead?"
"Sounds fine to me."
Cao Ren began to gather the game tokens. He pushed the black stones into a pile and accidentally swept most of them off the edge of the table. With surprising agility, Ren jumped out of his chair and dropped into a crouch to pick up the spilled pieces. His yi gaped open, revealing the shadow of hair on his sturdy chest.
Lu Meng gaped along with it. When Cao Ren lifted his head with a knowing gaze, he did not look away.
Ren replaced his game pieces on the board and then strode off to slide the door bolt into place, brawn of shoulder and hip apparent even in his comfortably fitted clothing.
The men faced each other.
Lu Meng got up the nerve to speak just as Cao Ren grabbed him in a tight embrace. Meng froze. Wide-eyed and open-mouthed, Ren jerked back as if burned. They stared without moving for a good few moments until Meng took hold of Ren's thick neck and pulled him in for a kiss.
This time, Cao Ren was the one who stopped in surprise. And then he returned the favor with gentle awe, clinging to Lu Meng as if he would otherwise fall over. His lips were soft, as was his bristled beard, and he became bolder as Meng slid a hand up to cup his cheek and touch the delicate whorl of his ear.
Between Cao Ren's burly warmth and deep kisses rich with after-dinner wine, Lu Meng stirred beneath his robes. He flushed, knowing it would only become more obvious. His face burned even more when he felt Ren react in kind. The men fumbled at each other's sashes until their yi slid off and puddled on the floor. They clutched together once again, hands roaming away from necks and shoulders to trace collar bones and skate over rough curls of hair. Shy fingers dared to stroke sensitive nubs that stiffened in response.
When the remaining barrier of cloth seemed unbearable, Lu Meng reached for the ties on his companion's pants. Cao Ren pulled away just long enough to stop him.
Instead, Ren put a hand on Meng's back and guided him into the bed by the far wall. The sheets had been freshly dried earlier that day, and they still carried the crisp scent of early frost.
Prompted by a shove on his shoulder, Lu Meng obligingly rolled over on his side. Cao Ren curled up behind him and stroked his flat stomach, allowing fingertips to slide under his waist band now and then. Teasing him. Tormenting him. And finally flitting over his cloth-clad bulge, cupping and handling him until he groaned with impatience.
The attentive hand turned its focus to Lu Meng's pants, undoing the ties with deft efficiency. Meng writhed free of the garment as Cao Ren shuffled out of his own. The sheets were cool against his bare skin until Ren drew close and ensconced him once again, toying with a thatch of fur before sliding further down to stoke the growing heat.
Cao Ren tugged and tantalized with silken expertise, his own arousal stiff against Lu Meng's rear. Maintaining a tenuous grip on his composure with thoughts of history texts and mathematical problems, Meng pressed back into his companion as if to signal the strange openness he was feeling, the void that needed to be filled.
He nearly lost control again when tentative fingers ventured near that needful and wanting place. They found no resistance and slipped inside, bringing an appreciative gasp. The fingers patiently explored as he arched into their wondrous friction.
Somewhere through the haze in which Lu Meng's only clear thought was a prayer that the fingers would never stop, they withdrew, leaving him frustratingly empty. Before he could voice a complaint, strong hands grasped his hips and guided him back against the press of something thicker and warmer and far more insistent. A firm thrust and he was full again, stretched wide to the brink of pain. He endured for the sake of the flame engulfing him from the hardness, the weight of an arm wrapped around his torso, the powerful leg bumped up behind his. And when he opened even more, he yearned to take in his companion until he overflowed. He was falling, drowning, and all he could do was lace his slender fingers through Cao Ren's sturdier ones, melding even further to the man who was substantial as the earth itself.
A surge swelled underneath him, a gentle rise becoming a tidal wave. Lu Meng hung on for the ride, soaring higher and higher in a primal crescendo. The wave exploded into blue spring skies where he drifted on the wind, a delicate ribbon among lacy clouds. From somewhere far below came a strangled shout and a hug that squeezed the rest of the air from his body.
The men lay sweat-slicked and entwined, too spent to do much else but bask in the last remnants of twilight as they drifted off to slumber.
Cao Ren woke in some dark and quiet hour, his body still aglow with the embers of sweet memory. Fervent embraces, sensual tightness, crashing release as Lu Meng shuddered and melted along with him...he must have been dreaming, plagued by the same unattainable fantasy of these past few days. The embers flared up, nearly rousing Ren once again, when he felt the weight of another in the bed.
Moonlight streamed through the window, pure and silver on the features of the man resting next to him. Cao Ren brushed back a lock of wavy hair for a better look at the finely carved lips, the chiseled nose, the eyes that somehow betrayed their intelligence even when asleep.
Lu Meng stretched, squinted, lazily opened his eyes. He reached over and took Cao Ren's hand. Squeezing fingers now and then, the men lay side by side in a peaceful silence that seemed to convey everything necessary. Even when they shuffled close into the casual drape of each others' arms, there was no need to speak.
At last, Lu Meng said the inevitable. "I had better leave."
Cao Ren nodded. "I understand."
Lu Meng pushed back the covers and climbed out of bed, sinewed and elegant in the dim light as he gathered his clothing. He pulled his pants up past lean hips, tied his yi in place over his hair-shaded chest, and messily redid the bun that had fallen out over the course of the evening.
Few would be around at this time other than soldiers on watch, who were more concerned with staying awake than with the nocturnal activities of their leadership. Yet it never hurt to be cautious. Lu Meng felt redolent with the musk of passion, and he feared it would be apparent to anyone he encountered.
The customary wine jug sat in the corner. Lu Meng uncapped it and splashed some of the contents on his clothing. Some might frown upon drunkenness, but it would be better received than the sort of diplomatic relations he had just enjoyed. After one last glance at Cao Ren softly snoring in a moonbeam, Meng padded out into the hall.
"Hey! Old man!"
Lu Meng jumped, even though the whisper belonged to someone who would not be bothered by his ruse.
Chen Yao appeared from a pocket of shadow. "Isn't it sorta past your bedtime? More like...a lot past your bedtime?"
"Yes, which is why I am on my way to sleep."
"This is funny. You of all people..." Yao sniffed, approached, and wrinkled his nose again with a smirk. "Thought you told me not to stay out late drinking."
Lu Meng arched an eyebrow in response. "And I thought you told me to live a little."
"Yeah, I did. About time you listened, too." Chen Yao playfully nudged his supervisor. "Now go get some sleep or you'll be sorry in the morning."
"Aye aye, captain."
Back in his quarters, Lu Meng slipped into bed with the thought that he would not be sorry at all.
weiqi - The Chinese name for a strategic board game commonly known as go.
yi - A wrap-style Han Chinese upper garment with an open front, crossed collar, and wide sleeves.