THE LEGEND OF NYAN CAT

CHAPTER 1

It all started when nyan cat was only an ordinary kitten living in a pet shop, until he was bought by a bratty little 5-year-old named Bernie and a mother (who was secretly a witch) that always gave Bernie whatever he wanted.

"I want that gray cat," said Bernie. "If I don't get what-!"

"You have EVERYTHING already, sweetie," she scolded. "I will never do what you say st-!"

Bernie gave his nastiest glare to his mother. Then he intentionally fell down and began kicking and screaming and crying in front of everyone. Soon the passersby were all looking at the two.

One random girl (about 2 years younger than him) asked why he was crying. "Did your mommy forget to change your diapers?" she asked. "My papa said one time my grandma also did that when mama was a baby."

"HEY!" The girl's mother frowned at her husband and daughter.

"Shut up, brat," Bernie screamed at the girl. "I'm not a baby, nor do I wear DIAPERS!"

"Bernie," said the astonished witch. "Swearing is bad, especially when you tell people younger than you to shut up!"

"But you just said it," her son cried. "You're so mean!"

The witch had enough. They were making such a big commotion her head was aching. "All right," she finally said. "Bernie, you can buy the kitten if you promise to be good."

"YAY!" Bernie said, getting up and wiping his (crocodile) tears.

At home, after they finished eating dinner and talking to each other in the kitchen, Bernie was thinking of a name to call nyan cat. "I know," he yelled. "I'll call him Nyanie!"

"Nyanie is a bad name, it sounds like nanny," the witch explained while washing a teacup. "And name the kitten a normal name."

"But I like the name," he complained. "The other names are too ordinary and BORING."

"Nyanie is even more boring than the others," she replied. "How about Paws? Or Cuddly?"

Before Bernie could answer back, something SO unrelated made him forget about Nyanie. He remembered he was craving pop tarts a while ago. Good thing they had bought some ready-made pop tarts at the supermarket near the pet shop for a few dollars.

"Mommy, where did you put the groceries?" he asked. "I think I'll have dessert tonight."

"Right over there at the corner," she said. "I bet I can read your mind. You want pop tarts."

So Bernie got the bag of food, tossing the canned goods covering the box of pop tarts. He ripped it open, got three, and began munching on one.

Then nyan cat walked into the kitchen to see what they were doing. Since young kids sometimes have crazy ideas, Bernie quickly sandwiched the cat between two of his other pop tarts. Nyan cat became furious, so he scratched Bernie so badly he was bleeding all over. The witch saw everything, making her mad too. So she got her wand from her secret porcelain unicorn figurine. She just removed the head and there was the wand. Then she chanted a spell.

"Make this nasty creature be abnormal, make him have a body of a pop tart most unusual. Let him say NYAN, and his stay at Earth I ban. Let him poop rainbows, let him run in space, and let this curse stay until he pays what he owes."

So the pop tarts began to stick to nyan cat's body permanently, and he was starting to say nyan instead of meow. Some weird magical force pushed nyan cat out of the house, leaving a hole on the roof. Then he uncontrollably pooped an endless rainbow.