Chapter 1
Once upon a time, after the fifth Harry Potter book, which was kind of alright, there lived a brave young strapping lad, known by the name Neville Longbottom. He lived in a magical world, which was actually the same world as our world, but he knew about secret hidden magic stuff, like potions that make you fart chickens. The wizards were mostly the same as us non-magical folks, with the same kinds of problems, but instead of taking Viagra, they cast "engorgio mio junkulus." It was time for our young hero to return to school for a bright new fresh zippy school year…but when the others saw him, they noticed there was something different about good ole Neville Longbottom. But what could that be…?
a/n
So this is super def a neville!centric ficcy, just a plot bunny that kicked me in the shins so bad I had to drop out of 3 classes to write this chappy. Please vote for your faavorite coupling, I'll conswider anyone not actually who's role in the movie was not played by an actor who made an appearance in the Sweeny Todd movie.
Tune in next chapter to find out Neville's secret!