Chapter One

Glancing up from my book I saw him. These days I just couldn't stop seeing him. And once I had stolen that first glance there was no way I could tear my eyes away from him.

It wasn't that he had just arrived in my life either. I had known him for ten years. Since we were eleven and started school together. He had been my best friend ever since he'd saved me from a terrifying troll that had wandered into the girl's bathroom and attempted to club me to death.

He was my Harry and I loved him.

But then there was Ron.

He had been my other best friend and the three of us had been inseparable. Until recently I had been Ron's girlfriend, for three years. We had started dating in our seventh and final year of school and at first it was fantastic. But then boredom set in and we stuck it out as long as we could. Ron wanted to be off playing Quidditch all the time while I had been stuck at home working. After school finished and the war had ended Ron's talent as a Keeper was spotted and he signed for Puddlemere United. Whereas I had decided to buy my very own bookshop, and had been spending every waking moment trying to get it exactly as I'd dreamed before opening. The long hours required for both our jobs had been the undoing of the relationship, but it was Ron's affair with one of the team's beaters that had been the final nail in the coffin! Harry had been caught somewhere in the middle. Ron expected loyalty from his best friend, but as Harry had plainly pointed out, he hadn't shown any to me so why should he expect it without question. Ron had stormed out of their shared house and hadn't been seen since. That was three months ago. Harry had been my rock. He had been there for me just as I had when he'd split from Ron's sister Ginny the winter before.

We eventually decided that it was pointless for us both to live in separate houses even though we spent a lot of our spare time together and so I moved in to Grimmauld Place with Harry. The house was so big that the two of us rattled around like two pennies in a money box. We may have not seen each other all afternoon but we always ate and spent the evenings together. Sometimes we'd stay in and watch television or listen to music or read and other times we go out dancing or go for a meal or to the cinema. We rejuvenated our friendship and became closer than ever.

I first realised that my feelings had changed when I found myself daydreaming about him. When the shop was quiet I would will him to walk through the door just because he missed me. Of course he was at the Ministry every day so in reality I knew that was never going to happen. I could dream though, right?

"Hermione…are you alright?" Harry's voice brought me back to the present.

"Sure, just dreaming, you know me Harry!" I confessed, blushing slightly.

"Anything I should know about?" He teased seeing my pink cheeks.

"If it was, I would tell you." I shoved my head back into my book to try and hide my obvious embarrassment.

"Would you?" He pressed.

My head shot back up and I looked him straight in the eyes. "Of course, why, what do you mean?"

"It's just that you've been different lately."

What? Different! I have been any different!

"What do you mean?" I repeated.

Harry just looked at me…he was uncomfortable I could tell. And I wasn't helping by blowing things all out of proportion.

"Nothing really, 'Mione, honest." He backtracked, obviously not wanting to get into anything.

I put my book down on the table and gave him my full attention. "Harry, look I'm sorry for being like this but you brought it up. I don't understand what you're trying to say that's all."

"I don't mean anything by this but you've just been a bit distant that's all." He finally came clean.

I can't hide the fact that I was shocked by his remark, but I forced myself to keep calm so we could get to the bottom of it.

"Distant?"

"Sorry, 'Mione. It's just sometimes you seem to be off in your own world and I feel a bit redundant around here." He explained.

"God, I'm sorry Harry, I hadn't even realised I was doing it. Why didn't you say something before?"

With a wry smile he answered, "Why do you think?"

I sighed, "I'm not that bad!"

"Look if you're missing Ron it's only natural. I mean you were together for three years you're bound to miss him."

I couldn't believe what Harry was saying. Why on God's earth would I miss that cheating, selfish pig when I spend every day with the sweetest most thoughtful man I was ever likely to meet?

"Harry you really don't understand women do you?" I smiled.

"No it's not something I'm famous for that's for certain!" He agreed light-heartedly.

"Why would you think I'm missing Ronald?"

"Well I don't know really." He muttered. "When you're in one of your daydreams you get all embarrassed and blush. I just assumed that you were thinking about Ron."

"It's definitely not Ron!" I started, then before I could stop myself I added, "Do you not think that I could be interested in someone else?"

I couldn't hide my frustration at having just admitted to that. Why couldn't I have just left well alone? I always end up digging myself into a great big muddy hole without any hope of being able to worm my way back out of it. Fuming, I stood up and practically ran out of the lounge and straight up to my own room.

Not long after I had slammed the door behind me and had flopped face down on my four poster I heard a gentle tapping at my door.

"Come on Hermione; don't be like this…I didn't mean anything by it. Look I didn't realise that you had met somebody new that's all!"

I sighed deeply and called back, "I haven't met anyone new."

The door creaked open and Harry poked his head around it. "So it's someone you already know then?"

I nodded, ready to admit defeat. Maybe it was about time to come clean about exactly how I felt for him. The thing was could I say it?

He knelt down in front of me and took my hands in his. "I'm interested in someone too." He confessed, a huge grin appearing on his handsome face. His green eyes were glittering with excitement as he told me that her name was Louisa and she was also an Auror for the Ministry. He had finally plucked up the courage to ask her out on a date for the following night and wanted to tell me beforehand. I can't deny that my heart plummeted about twelve feet as he spoke the words. I got lost in my own silent despair, wishing that I had never said anything about being interested in someone and berating myself for believing that I could tell him how I was feeling.

"So come on then 'Mione…I've told you mine now you tell me yours."

My mind whirred with the events of the evening and I couldn't think of anything to say.

"Erm…it's just, someone that comes into the shop quite often." I lied. My mind unable to think of a feasible excuse.

"But you said you already knew him?" Harry questioned. Trust him to actually take notice now.

"Well yeah, he is a regular customer." I argued.

Harry grinned, "Sooooooo! When are you going to ask him out?"

My jaw must have dropped right onto the bed as his words sunk in. "What? Never!"

Harry gave me a look as if to say 'if I can do it you can do it!', "Oh come on 'Mione…what would it hurt just to ask?"

"Well for starters, he could laugh at me and say no!" I replied, letting my head fall forwards onto my hands.

"Why wouldn't he say yes? I mean, you're smart, you're funny and you're beautiful…what more could a guy ask for?"

It was at that very moment when my heart stopped beating, albeit only for a second. He thinks I'm beautiful!

"Thanks Harry," I mutter, avoiding his piercing green eyes, "it's been a long time since anyone's said such nice things about me. And it's the first time anyone's called me beautiful! So even if it was just a line I'm going to hold you to it and never ever let you take it back." Joking was the only way I could have responded without bursting into tears of both happiness and sorrow.

"I've always thought you are beautiful and I always will." Harry confirmed, getting back to his feet. "Well guess I'd better hit the sack, I need my beauty sleep. Goodnight Hermione."

"Night Harry." I smiled at his retreating back. Oh Lords!

The following evening I decided to go and visit Neville and Luna instead of sitting home alone waiting for Harry to come back after his date with Louisa. I knew I'd never stand a night on my own anyway, but knowing that Harry was out with another girl was just a nightmare.

I apparated into Neville and Luna's large neat garden and sighed, how I wished I had just told him last night. Before he'd mentioned her, then maybe it would have been me with him now instead. After all, he does think I'm beautiful! Blushing I knock on the heavy wooden door and wait only three or four seconds before Neville opens it and grins at me.

"Hermione, hi, come in come in."

"Hello Neville, how's things?"

"Not two bad, considering." He replies shutting the door behind me.

"Considering what?" I ask, concerned.

"Well I've been meaning to tell you this for a while only I haven't seen you and … well … Luna's left me…for Ron."

Being stuck for words wasn't something I was famed for but Neville's straightforward statement had rendered me speechless.

"I thought you might take it badly, that's why I've been putting it off."

"Luna…"

Neville nodded.

"…and Ron?"

"I know, it sounds weird doesn't it. But we weren't getting along that well anymore…it was for the best really."

"Wait a minute…was this before or after he left me?" I enquired, suddenly finding my voice again.

"That I don't know. She had been acting strangely for about a month or so before you two finished, I think, but whether that had anything to do with it or not, I couldn't tell you."

I could tell that the whole business had affected Neville, even though he wouldn't admit it, and for the first time in ages I was really angry at Ron again. Although on the plus side I seemed to have forgotten about Harry and his 'friend' briefly.

"Oh Neville, its okay to be upset you know. I won't tell anyone." I whispered, pulling him into a hug.

"Thanks Hermione," He wrapped his long arms around my back and we just stood there comforting each other.

After what seemed like hours we moved apart and Neville said, "Why don't we go for a drink, I haven't been out for weeks."

I nodded in agreement, "Let's go."

We arrived at the Three Broomsticks five minutes later raring to drinks ourselves into oblivion. It was a quite busy night and we had to fight our way to the bar. Once we had our drinks we headed for the only empty table to drown our sorrows.

Six Firewhiskeys later I was comfortably numb.

"So, where's Harry tonight?" Neville eventually asked me.

"He's out on a date!" I told him with an undertone of bitterness which he immediately picked

up on.

"Oh, dare I ask who with?" He tested.

"Oh, some floozy from the Ministry. She's an Auror too and he just fancies the pants off her!" I ranted and took a long drink from my cold glass.

Neville raised his eyebrows questioningly but said nothing. He knew me enough by now to know that once I got going it was better not to interrupt.

"It's just typical that is. Who was it who supported him when Ginny dumped him? Who has stood faithfully by his side for ten years without question? Who was stupid enough to move in with him so he wouldn't be lonely…and then fall in love with him?" I let my head fall forward onto the table, it was wet with spilt drink but I didn't care. I hadn't even realised what I'd said until Neville questioned it.

"You're in love with Harry?"

My head flew back up. "What? Don't be stupid, Neville, of course I'm not in love with Harry! Whatever gave you such a silly idea?"

"You just…"

"What I said was…I actually said…what I meant was…" I struggled to find a feasible cover up. If I'd been sober it wouldn't have been a problem but, as anyone could tell you, a little bit of alcohol does wonders for my inhibitions. Eventually I gave up trying. Neville isn't stupid; he knows exactly what I said and what was meant. I am in love with Harry Potter.

"Oh sod it. Yes Neville I am. I am in love with Harry."

The silence that followed was somewhat uncomfortable. I instantly regretted even going out let alone letting my deepest secret out of the bag. Saying it out loud just made it sound like such a big deal and I just knew that Neville would not let something this big lie.

"So what are you going to do about it?" He finally asked me, folding his arms across his chest.

"What do you think?" I challenged, "Nothing."

"What have you got to lose?"

I laughed, "Everything! He's my best friend Neville, do you honestly think that even if he didn't feel the same that things wouldn't change?"

"Well, have you tried dropping hints?" He suggested.

"Of course I have, telling him is the only thing left."

"Then do it!" He urged me, grabbing my balled fists from across the table.

I could feel the tears welling up into my eyes. "I can't. It's just too big a risk for me to take. I couldn't bear it if he didn't say the same back. You know me Neville; I'd never survive something like that!"

"Well in that case there's only one other thing you can do." He stated, confidently.

"And what's that?" I enquired with a sigh.

"You'll have to make him jealous."