Disclaimer: I own neither One Punch Man nor Fairy Tail. And I hate it when people add a "funny" comment on this legal bullshit.
P.S.: The second sentence is not intended as a joke. Seriously, stop it. And please stop using the few Japanese words you learned from the anime. I'm not using German either.
A/N: Well, now that everyone knows, let's proceed with my note! I didn't upload, but why? A few words: exams, driving lessons, vacations, political activities. Until the end of February. In March I will return to my schedule, but around Easter I am on vacation, so yeah. Nothing much to say, still have to think how to continue my other stories. Got great ideas.
This story is one (of a few?) parodies on the "Lucy gets kicked out etc"-stories. I know, there are great stories out there, but a lot of horrible excuses of a story, too. I will exclude the lack of grammar, structure and vocabulary those pathetic pieces of text provide, and instead just use the usual scenario. And no, I don't hate other authors. I just hate people at the moment. And I'm just pissed off. I know, you want to be creative, but please, please read it twice before posting it! Well, here goes my "story". Enjoy!
It was a sunny day in Fiore. The sun was shining bright, everyone was happy, especially at the mage guild Fairy Tail. It was three months after the Edolas Incident, and they were still celebrating Lisanna's return. Only one person wasn't happy: Lucy Heartfilia, the guilds celestial mage. She felt left out, and considering the fact that no one would talk to her or accompany her on a mission, she was right. She thought that her dire situation was the worst of her life, but she would be proven wrong.
"Hey Luce!" Natsu approached Lucy, a big grin on his face; he was followed by the rest of Team Natsu and Lisanna. "W-what is it, Natsu?", asked Lucy, a little confused that someone spoke to her. "Well, we thought you should leave the team. You're weak and we always have to save you. We'll stick with Lisanna instead." Lisanna gave her a little, maybe apologetic smile. "Y-yeah, sure.", said Lucy with a shaky voice, tears dwelling in her eyes. She stood up and went to Makarov's office. She knocked and entered without asking for an answer.
"Lucy? What do you want?", asked Makarov surprised. "I wanna leave Fairy Tail." "What?!", exclaimed Makarov. "I wanna do it so I can become stronger...", said Lucy in a low voice. Makarov stared at her, thinking. "If you want it, I can't stop you." He sighed and made her mark disappear. Before he could say anything, Lucy left and ran out of the guild, crying.
‑
After she arrived at her apartment, she started drawing various pieces of clothing out of her drawer. She packed a bag and left, leaving a note to Fairy Tail. She boarded a train to Era, far away from Magnolia.
‑
The train had come to a halt. Lucy left the station and looked around; Era sure was isolated. A crater still showed the ruins of what had been the council once. She sighed as memories of previous adventures came up. Lucy turned around and strolled through the nearest forest, aimlessly. After a few hours she found a pond and sat down. Thoughts of her former guild surfaced, and she started to cry. Five minutes had passed, when she heard a low yet feminine voice. "Why are you crying?", the voice asked. Lucy frantically turned around, but she couldn't see a single person. "Who are you? Where are you?", she asked scared. "Me?", chuckled the voice. "My name is Silvana, and I am a dragon." Something moved behind the trees and a dragon entered the clearing. It was huge, it scales had the color of autumnal leaves. "What is your name, girl?", asked Silvana. "L-L-Lucy.", whispered Lucy scared.
Considering she hadn't been killed yet, Lucy gathered all the courage that was left and asked the question which should change her life forever. "Can you train me to become a dragon slayer?"
‑
Two years had passed. Fairy Tail was still the strongest guild in Fiore, and nobody had missed a certain blonde so far. Natsu was chatting with his team, when suddenly the doors of the guild were slammed open and a hooded figure stood in the entrance. The figure looked around and ran towards Natsu. The pink haired dragon slayer looked confused at the mysterious visitor, until a glowing fist connected with his face and sent him flying.
"What the fuck?! What was that for?", asked Natsu and stood up. "Natsu Dragneel, I demand you to fight me!", said the cloaked person. "Alright!", yelled Natsu. They left the guild and got ready for an all-out battle.
‑
The guild had gathered and already begun betting on the victor. Natsu was the favorite, since just a handful of people bet on the aggressor. "I'm all fired up!", yelled Natsu and lit his fists, leaping at the person. "Forest Dragons Roar!", yelled the hooded person, and a vortex of plants was shot from it's mouth, hitting Natsu. He fell down, bruised. "You're a dragon slayer?", he asked. "I am, and I am...", the hood was lifted. "...I am Lucy Heartfilia!" Everyone gasped.
"Lucy?!", yelled everyone. "You're a dragon slayer?" "I was trained by Silvana, the Forest Dragon. Your pathetic flames can't defeat me!", said Lucy. "Are you stupid? Wood burns!", spat Natsu. He sent a roar towards her, which she nullified with her own. "Are you stupid? Forests aren't simply made of woods, you flame brain.", taunted Lucy, causing everyone to chuckle. Embarrassed Natsu ran towards her. "You can't defeat me!", screamed Lucy. "Forest Dragons Bellow!", she chanted and hurled a giant attack towards Natsu.
‑
After this incident she entered the guild and instantly became a S-Class wizard. Apparently she had learned a lot of other magics and was one of the strongest mages of all time, you know how that shit goes.
A/N: Yeah, this story has a hell lot of flaws, but I don't give a fuck, or to say it with someone else words: "A quantum computer calculating a thousand years isn't even close to the numbers of fucks I don't give."
Why it is that way? Well, first, I am tired. Second, I am tired. Third, it fits this type of story perfectly. Too tired to continue this slightly important note. Good night.
P.S.: If somebody uses Japanese again, I'll use German!
P.P.S.: I am todernst!
P.P.P.S.: Forget it, that was a lame joke.
P.P.P.P.S.: How many 'post' can be before the 'scriptum'? That's fucked up.