This has been rattling around in my head since, OLTL ended and ABC and Prospect Park trashed what was left of my fav couple. This is my take on how to fix this mess. At this point, no idea who owns what but, I know it ain't me.

August 4, 2011

"Natalie, I'm home", John said as he came thru the door with a bag of take out in his hand. Setting both his keys and the take out down he called, " Liam…Liam where are you buddy." Looking thru the dining room into the kitchen, and not seeing anyone, he made his way to the stairs, "Hey come on, I brought some take out from Rodi's…..Natalie?"

"I'm here", she said from the top of the stairs.

"Are you hungry? I brought us something to eat….where's Liam?"

Natalie couldn't fight the smile that broke out on her face. "He's with my mom for the afternoon. I thought we could use some time to ourselves" she said nervously. "Is that ok?"

"Is that ok? That is more than ok. Come here." John slipped his arms around her and kissing her softly then pulling back just enough to place a small kiss on her forehead. "I love you", he said.

"I will never get tired of hearing that, I love you, too. And…." taking a deep breath, she said, "I have some news."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yup."

"Ok well, let me get some plates and we can talk while we eat because, I have plans for you later" he said, his smile growing wider. He couldn't image what he would be without her. They had been through so much together and now that all of the pieces had finally fallen into place, they were happy. If anyone would have told him that day he walked into Crossroads that this woman would be the one he would spend the rest of his life with, the one to be the mother of his child, he would have said they were crazy. He wanted her, yes, from the moment he saw her. From the second she opened her mouth and he looked into her eyes.

"Uhm...Christian said you were looking for me?"

"You're Natalie?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Well, if I didn't have a reason before…I got one now."

"Really?" she grinned, "And what might those be?" She asked, knowing full well what he had in mind. She loved this man, more than she thought was possible. What they had was so much more than what she thought was possible. She loved Christian and Jared both. Completely and totally but, while they were both gentle and kind souls, their touch never burned the way John's did. She could feel him in her soul, way down deep.

"Are you gonna take your shot?"

"Right now."

"Well, that's a surprise but, we should probably nourish ourselves first. We'll need the energy", he smirked. Lowering his mouth to her, he deepened the kiss.

"Alright, enough of that for now", he said as he pulled away. "We can finish that later; first, we need to eat. I'll go get some plates, you sit down. I'll be right back."

"Ok", she smiled.

Hearing the flap on the mailbox bang closed, Natalie went over to the door to retrieve the mail.

"Hey, you wanna beer", John asked from the kitchen.

Taking a deep breath, and thinking of the new life inside her, Natalie said, "No thanks, can you grab me a water?"

"Water?" He asked returning to the living room with plates, forks, napkins, a beer for him and her water.

"Yeah", she said. "Just sounds good right now." She smiled imagining the look on his face when she told him her news. Liam had been a surprise, completely unplanned. One they weren't even sure they were ready for. This baby, they had talked about even though she never thought it would happen so fast.

They hadn't been in their new house very long, when they spent one afternoon christening almost every room and John had told her about a dream or a vision he'd had the night of his accident. A dark haired boy and a red headed girl. He was ready for another he had said. She couldn't have been happier.

"Is that the mail?" He asked, "I'm waiting on some information from Harrisburg on a case."

"Yeah, I don't see anything like that, just bills, bills, bills….and this package for me. Huh, I wonder what it is." It was a large manila envelope with no return address on it.

"Well, you won't know till you open it", John said reaching for their lunch and opening the bag.

Natalie carefully opened the end and pulled out the contents.

She read the note, and then read it again and her stomach dropped.

-Natalie, thought you deserved to know what kind of man John McBain

really is. Love always, Uncle Todd.-

She slowly separated the note from what was clearly a picture. She couldn't breathe, she thought her heart stopped and she could feel it breaking. She couldn't speak and she couldn't look away. Her brain didn't want to believe what her eyes were seeing. Thoughts were flashing in her head quickly and incompletely. What...who is this…is this real…what am I going do…this can't be right…is there more than this…

"Natalie, what is it?" John asked standing up. "Hey, are you ok? Sweetheart, what's wrong?"

She looked up at him, the tears on the verge of falling, she still couldn't speak.

"Natalie, what is it?" She shook her head, trying to clear her mind to speak, never breaking eye contract with him. She shook it again as no words came. Looking at him, she slowing turned the photo around. His face fell.

"I can explain", he whispered. All she could do it stare, the tears had started to fall and she could do nothing to stop them. She couldn't move, she was paralyzed. Had she even taken a breath yet? Her heart was shattered.

Finally she managed, "You can explain?" in a broken voice.

"Where did you get this?" He asked, had Sam sent it to her? No, she wouldn't do that would she? He wanted to tell her, he HAD planned on telling her, just not yet. It wasn't the right time. He reached out to take the papers out of her hand and she drew her hand back quickly.

"Is this real? Is this true?" She whispered. He could see the pain and betrayal in her blue eyes. Her beautiful blue eyes he could get lost in for days, begging him to tell her it wasn't true. The sadness, radiating off of her in waves.

"Yes, it's real." He said lowly.

"Oh my god", she cried, she breathing coming now in pants as she tried to get a grip on her emotions, "Why?"

"Natalie, it's not what you think."

"Did you just seriously say that to me?" She scoffed.

"Listen to me, I was drunk, very drunk and I missed you and I wasn't thinking straight." As much as he wanted to turn away from the look on her face in shame, he couldn't. This wasn't right; he should have told her sooner.

"So you were drunk and horny and….what….thought you would substitute me with some random slut?"

"No, no it wasn't like that. I meant to tell you, I just…"

"You just what….forgot? You just haven't gotten around to it? What?" The anger was starting to set in now that the shock was wearing off.

"Ok", he said slowly, "Let's just sit down and talk about this. It didn't mean anything, I promise you."

"Oh, you promise me", she scoffed. Trying hard not to break down, Natalie looked back down at the picture in her hand. "She's very pretty", she said evenly.

"Not as pretty as you."

Looking up, she glared at him. "Stop it, just….stop…" She shoved the picture and the note into his chest and started to walk away.

"Wait, sweetheart, please…can we talk about this?"

"Why, what is there to say", she said her voice breaking and not turning around to face him.

"I never meant for this to happen. I never meant to hurt you. I never, ever wanted to hurt you."

"But, you did", she whispered. "Do you love her? Do you want to be with her?"

His heart was breaking with the sound of her voice, so sad, so defeated and hating the fact that he'd forced her to ask him that question. He hated that he made she doubt him. "The only woman I want is you, the only woman I love is you", he told her. "You healed me, and I can't live without you. Please just…let's talk about this" He said to her back, he reached for her to turn her to him and she flinched.

"I'm sorry, please let's just-"

"I need to go", she said interrupting him.

He didn't think his heart could have sunk much lower but, it did at those words.

"What? Go where?" He asked.

She closed her eyes as fresh tears started to fall. She could barely get the word out, and he barely heard it as both of their hearts were breaking so loudly.

"Away." She ran up the stairs.