The End Of All Things.
As she laid on the table she looked up at the theatre lights, she had been in theatre thousands of times how had she never noticed how bright the lights were? She felt every one in the room staring at her exposed stomach she had never felt this vulnerable she felt more sweat beading on her forehead, a hand swiped across it and wiped it away "its ok Jac, its all going to be ok" Jonny whispered leaning his head down to where hers was laid, she always looked at him for reassurance but for the first time she couldn't see the cool calmness that she usually saw in his eyes, he looked just as horribly scared as she felt. He sat and stroked her hair looking into her eyes and trying to smile this should be the happiest moment of their lives but they both felt the sadness that flooded the room.
"Right then guys lets get started" Mr T said from beneath his surgical mask as he headed towards Jacs swollen abdomen, Mr T usually sounded happy and carefree but Jac was sure she could sense an air of panic in his voice. Jonny carried on stroking Jacs hair looking over to Mr T and then back to Jac, the room was full but so eerily quiet, The epidural meant all Jac could feel was a slight tugging at her abdomen and then when she felt an unusual pressure she held her breath knowing this was the moment that she hated herself for dreading, Jonny looked over at Mr T and watched as he pulled the tiny baby into the world "as predicted its a girl" Mr T announced as he handed the tiny girl to the neonatoligist, no cries filled the room " is she alive?" Jac asked in a voice that was no more than a whisper. Jonny had not been able to take his eyes from their daughter in the 10 minutes since her birth but hearing Jacs question he turned to answer with a small smile on his face " she's alive Jac, she is alive and she is beautiful, they are just giving her some help breathing but she is alive. You did it" he leant down and kissed her forehead as tears of relief escaped both their eyes, the fight had only just really begun but this felt like a massive victory already. Their daughter only weighed 5pounds but she was already beating the odds.
Jonny walked into the room and sat next to Jac's bed, they were both exhausted. Jac looked at him sadly, he had never seen this side of her, she looked like she could just break any minute. He took her hand in his and looked in to her beautiful blue eyes and gently he began to speak "they have had to tube her, she was struggling and they felt she needed a break but she is taking her own breaths as well" Ric and Elliott are with her now to assess she is goin for a CT then they are going to make a surgical plan and meet with us first thing in the morning" he let go of her hand for a moment and fumbled in his wallet "now for the good bit, she is exactly 5pounds, she has a tiny tuft of dark hair right in the middle of her head, she hasn't opened her eyes yet, I think she is waiting for you" tears slid down her cheek as he said that " and one of the nurses took this picture for us" he held the picture and they both gazed at the life they created, he climbed onto the bed next to her and pulled her body into his, at that, moment she let go of everything and for the first time in years let every barrier she ever had go and sobbed into his chest, she felt like the tears would never end she felt she would drown in the sorrow she let go of. In the exact space of time neither of them could remember why they weren't together.